Sarahamanda – Whoo, bet you like this chapter too! Thanks, hon.
The Lady Morana – Oh but, Snape has some problems in the last book too, doesn't he? Hmm…XD And he's just confused. His poor heart has been broken!
.Blood.Drop.Lolita. – XD Well they aren't ALL good, but thanks!
Okay guys, this took forever. Real life caught up with me a tad, but I think things are starting to simmer down.
Chapter FourWrong
Remus chewed on his nails nervously as they walked through the graveyard in Godric's Hollow. Severus walked besides him silently, and Remus was grateful he made no argument about visiting the graves. They both knew they wouldn't find Sirius sitting on James' grave in the middle of the day, but Remus just had to see them.
Severus glared at a man eyeing Remus. He was older, so he probably knew the connection Remus had to the Potters. He slipped his arm around the werewolf's waist, shooting the old man a dirty look. No one was going bother his poor Remus while he was in this state.
Remus barely noticed the arm. He stopped when he came upon the graves, and for a while they both just stared at it. Then Remus nodded once before turning and walking off, Severus trailing behind him.
Oooo0000oooO
"You really should have booked a room earlier if you were going to be picky. We're a very popular resort, you know. You are lucky it is the off season or you would need to order a month in advance." The snooty lady behind the counter said coldly, her pointed nose turned upwards at the two men.
"We can't sleep in the same bed. Do you have any idea how awkward that would be?" Remus snapped. No, the lady probably didn't. She just saw two poorly dressed men (Remus didn't have very much money for nice muggle clothes, and Severus had poor taste in muggle clothes). She didn't know they were ex lovers, or gay, or anything else. And probably wouldn't care if she did.
Fucking muggles. Severus thought angrily as Remus pushed over the money Dumbldore had given them. They were staying at a resort so it looked like a romantic vacation, rather then a hunt. They couldn't risk the Ministry finding out what they were doing, and it would be too suspicious if two teachers, who obviously knew Sirius Black, disappeared every weekend.
They took the elevator to the second floor, (Severus remembered how much he had hated them as a child) and found their room. It was decently sized, and Remus brightened instantly upon seeing the couch. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.
"Okay, so, tomorrow we'll go for a walk on the beach. Some simple spells and anyone watching us will see us walking all day, instead of what we're really doing. I've got some places I want to look already, and if we don't find anything we'll look in less obvious places on Sunday." Remus spoke as he took a pillow and the top cover from the bed and laid them on the couch. He sat down when he had finished and looked expectantly at Severus.
Severus blinked. "What are you doing?" He asked finally.
"Well first would be his parents old home, though I doubt he's there, Dumbldore asked us to look there. Then I thought we'd look-"
"No. I mean, what are you doing?" He gestured towards the pillow and cover.
"Oh. Well I figured, you know, that we couldn't sleep together…"
"Remus, you can't sleep on that tiny thing. You'll get a neck cramp, and it's to stiff to sleep on anyways. It's a big bed. We can share." He sat down on the end of the bed, staring at Remus.
Remus looked back for a moment then away and nodded. "Yeah, okay then." He said and got up, bringing the pillow and blanket over with him.
Oooo0000oooO
They took turns in the bathroom, then crawled into bed awkwardly, sitting as far apart as possible.
"Why do you think he wouldn't return to his parents old home?" Severus asked quietly.
"Because he hated that place with a passion. He would never want to return there." Remus replied. "He walked out of that house screaming nasty words at his mother, with her screaming them right back." He shook his head at the memory. "You can imagine how they felt about him running off with a male half blood werewolf."
"I see." Severus said, glancing at Remus who was sadly looking down at his hands. "I wish it was me."
"Huh?"
"I wish it was me that you ran away with the first time." He said quietly and Remus smiled, moving closer to the other.
"Really? You don't…regret being with me?" He asked.
Severus blinked. "Why would you ever think I would regret it?" He asked.
"Because…because of the letter." Remus whispered. "Because you slammed the door in my face and told me you hated me."
"What are you talking about?" Severus demanded. He had spent years wishing Remus would just come back. He had never slammed the door in his face!
Remus got up and went to his robes, pulling out a well-worn letter. It appeared to have been crumpled up, set on fire at one point put quickly put out, and had stains here or there, making the ink run.
It was hard to read, but it was definitely his writing. Actually, it looked a little messy, like he hadn't been that coordinated when he wrote it. It was insult upon insult, with a few threats between the lines. "I was drunk." He decided finally. "I got drunk often after you left. I wouldn't doubt that I wrote this." He threw the letter aside. "I probably meant it then, but I don't anymore."
Remus sat in bed once more and nodded. "I see." He said softly. They sat for a while, staring at the wall. Then Severus reached out, putting his hand on Remus's thigh. Remus looked over at him but suddenly he was being kissed, and he kissed back, and Severus wrapped his arms around the werewolf, pulling him closer. Their tongues met, the hand that wasn't wrapped around Remus slid up his nightshirt as he crawled on top of him.
"Severus, stop it!" Remus shoved the other man away and sat up, panting. Severus looked away, feeling ashamed of himself. "We can't."
"I know. I'm sorry. I don't know was possessed me." Severus said.
"It's not your fault. It's mine."
"What? What do you mean? I was the one attacking you, Remus."
"No…we can't have sex because I'm dirty, Severus. You shouldn't have even kissed me."
"Dirty? Did someone rape you?" Severus asked angrily but Remus shook his head.
"No one would rape someone like me, Severus." He said. "I need to go."
"What? You can't-" but Remus was gone with a loud crack, leaving a startled Severus behind.
Ohh, I don't think this was a very good chapter, but I'm glad I was able to write something.
