Chapter 4: 3D TV

Kitchen

"Well Marge, I'm off to work. I'll be using the memories of all the vengeful, possessive and demonic romance we shared this weekend to drown out the boredom of my schedule."

"Oh yea, I'll be doing the same…"

After kissing his wife goodbye, the kids entered the kitchen.

"Here are your lunches kids."

Not taking an interest in it, Bart said "The only thing I'm hungry for is revenge."

Rolling her eyes at his vindictive attitude, Lisa said "Oh Bart, if you're not willing to have a lucid conversation with him, the least you can do is NOT stoop to his level."

"And if you're not willing to help, the least YOU can do is stay out of it."

"Hmm point taken."

Nuclear Power Plant

Water Cooler

"So last night I ran into this hot chick who just happened to be a Buddhist." Lenny said to Carl.

"Oh did you ask her out?"

"Well, I…"

Before finishing the story, Lenny and Carl looked over to see Homer racing towards them. "GUYS! GUYS! Marge LOVED The Exorcist!"

Lenny smiled at his friend's success with the horror movies and replied "Way to go!"

"Yea, that's great Homer!"

After receiving a thumbs up from his friends, Homer began to explain "Yea, you know for a while there I was worried we weren't spending enough time together. She does all the cooking, I handle all the drinking, but there was never an activity we could share… until now."

Springfield Elementery

The Playground

Anxious to get things moving, Bart asked "All right Milhouse, you know the plan."

"You really think it'll work?"

Sure of himself, Bart replied "That kid claims to be a bully, and if there's one thing a bully can't resist, it's to cheat on a test… now go!"

Following Bart's orders, Milhouse went to approach Martin who he saw sitting on the bench.

Martin looked over to see his classmate reading and asked "What's that you're reading?"

"Oh just a copy of this week's test answers, that Damian was nice enough to give me."

Being the do-gooder that he was, Martin stood and said "As class president, I have no choice but to report this matter to Principal Skinner."

Milhouse then gave Bart a thumbs up as Martin walked off. The class prankster nodded his head and began to approach Damian.

How's it going Damian?

With an evil grin on his face, Damian laughed "Not bad, how's the comic business? Ha-ha"

Smiling with his hands behind his back, Bart nodded "Oh yea good one…I just came over to say no hard feelings."

"Or in your case shredded feelings."

"Right, and to show you I mean it, I'm going to give you that copy of my 'Awesome Answers' that I should have given to you for free before."

"Heck yea you should have!" Damian snapped, not hesitating to snatch the paper Bart pulled out from behind his back.

"Well enjoy."

After handing over the paper, Bart began walking away as Martin and Principal Skinner approached Damian.

"There he is Principal Skinner! With his stack of who knows how much plagiaristic information!"

With a frown on his face, Skinner eagerly grabbed Damian and snapped "All right young man, you're coming with me."

A perplexed look grew on the troublemaker's face as he insisted "What? But I didn't do anything!"

Not believing him, Skinner said "Now, now, save your lies for Teacher Appreciation Day."

Bart and Milhouse watched as Principal Skinner took Damian away "And that's how it's done Milhouse."

"Maybe. I still think we should have bought him a puppy."

Bus Stop

Lisa was walking home when she came across Grace. "Lisa!"

"Grace! Did you send in the petition?"

"Yes, but it could be a month before we hear from them."

A concerned look appeared on Lisa's face as she asked "Oh…The Tree Huggers aren't planning on staying tied down for that long are they?"

"Only the suicidal ones." Grace shrugged her shoulders, not finding it to be unusual.

"Oh dear."

"I just wanted to thank you Lisa. We never would have been able to perpetuate this much for saving the environment if it wasn't for you."

Amazed at the information, Lisa asked "Really?"

Nodding at the question, Grace said "You truly are a great friend."

The Simpsons

Kitchen

Marge was sitting and shaking at the kitchen table with fear in her eyes. Holding her coffee close to her, she was preparing to take a sip when she heard "I'm home sweetie!"

The drink spilled on the floor as Marge screamed "AHH!"

"Couldn't wait to see me huh? Guess what else couldn't wait to see us. These new 3d glasses I got for each of us!" Homer proudly showed his wife.

Staring at the new merchandise, Marge cautiously asked "Where and why did you get those?"

Flashback

Kwik-E-Mart

"Good afternoon Mr. Homer." Apu greeted his loyal customer.

"Hey Apu, just give me this 6 pack of Duff and 10 lottery tickets. One liberty bell (gasp), two liberty bells (gasp), d'oh!"

Seeing the disappointed look on his customer's face, Apu asked "If I may ask Mr. Homer, what would you do if you won the lottery?"

"Well, Marge and I have really been hitting it off with scary movies lately. Maybe I'd pay someone to film one at our place… or let me be in one!"

"Mr. Homer, if virtual terror is what you seek, might I suggest you buy these 3d glasses? Buy them while they're on sale now for only $29.99."

End of Flashback

Kitchen

Looking at his worried wife, Homer went on to say "I know how much you loved those movies, so I'm going to let you pick which gets to have the honor of being viewed by us first through these babies!"

"Umm… why don't we talk about it later? I think the kids just walked in." Marge eagerly left the room.

Seeing her race out, Homer replied "Great way to build suspense sweetie!"

Front Door

"Hey kids! How was school?!"

An eager smile grew on Bart's face as he replied "Awesome! Now I know why bad things happen to good people."

Lisa glared as she bluntly said "It's a way of life?"

"No, so good people like me can think of even better ways to get back at others." Bart said excitedly.

"Hmm… well, I'm glad your day went well."

After the kids ran upstairs, Homer walked in wearing the 3d glasses "Wow, with these glasses, it's like the kids are standing right beside me!"

Homer's Bedroom

"Oh baby, screw romantic-comedies. We're going to take romance and horror to a new level tonight… with "Romorror Films!"

Marge entered the bedroom as she asked "Who are you talking to?"

Homer turned to face his wife as he said "Oh, I was talking to the glasses. So Marge, did you pick a film?"

Marge stood staring at Homer holding Saw IV, Saw V, and The Exorcist "Uhhh…"

"I can't blame you for not being able to choose. They were all great."

Rubbing her neck, Marge nervously laughed and said "Oh yea, that's exactly it."

The eager man then pulled out his laptop from under the bed and said "So instead, we'll just test these awesome specs with this set of 1000 horror clips I found on YouTube."

" STOP! STOP! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!"

Laughing at her reaction, Homer said "Whoa baby, save it for when I hit play!"

"Homer, we have to talk."

"Can I still wear the glasses?"

Grunting at his inability to take things seriously, Marge muttered "Fine."

"Wahoo!"

"Homer, I love spending time with you, but I just can't take those movies. They keep me up at night, so all I want to do is sleep during the day. I can't sleep during the day though, because all I can hear is the evil voices from those horrific scenes playing in my head!"

Homer began to take off the glasses as he listened to his troubled wife.

"I still want us to do things together; I just want us to both be able to enjoy them."

Wrapping his arm around her, Homer said "Marge, we don't have to watch those movies anymore."

"Really?"

"All I need to make my romantic life complete is you."

"Oh Homie!"

After putting the glasses back on, Homer added "You know, you look even sexier in 3d."

THE END

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