I was losing it. I was losing it in front of Kurt. I couldn't see straight. The night swam in front of my eyes. I was panting and shaking.
"Seb?" He sounded worried. I shook my head, trying to breathe. It would pass. I was already outside and that would help. "Sebastian? What's happening? You're scaring me. Should I get help? Is it asthma? Do you have an inhaler? Do you need to go to the hospital?" Scratch that, he was freaking out. I gasped at air starting to laugh through my tears and panic attack.
"It-it's okay. C-Calm down, Princess." I gasped out, "Ju-just give me a sec. Just ne-ed to breathe." I felt him relax next to me and he started rubbing my back. It immediately calmed me down enough to start taking slower breaths. I ran my hands through my now hopelessly messed up hair as I came down.
"Well that sobered me up." I attempted to joke but my grin fell flat.
"What was that? Are you okay?" I nodded.
"It was just a panic attack."
"Just? Seb, that was terrifying." That made me actually crack a smile. I rested a hand on his thigh heavily and shook him a bit.
"It is fine, Hummel. Don't be such a girl. I used to get 'em all the time when I was a kid. I can handle it." He bumped his shoulder against mine.
"What set you off?" I shrugged.
"The alcohol, remembering all the stupid things I did to you and your gang of misfits, trying to figure out why I wanted that forgiveness from you so much it hurt and then when I got it feeling like I didn't deserve it."
"Well what do you know; Sebastian Smythe has a heart after all." I laughed.
"Yeah well don't go telling anyone. I got a reputation to uphold remember?" He rested his chin on my shoulder and wrapped an arm around my waist.
"I won't tell. Our secret." His breath was warm on my neck. I could turn and kiss him. Kiss him so hard we'd both loose our breath. Press him down on to the porch and make him writhe. I might have been still drunk enough to do it too but once more Jeff felt like shouting at the top of his lungs.
"Hey! Kurty, Seb!" We turned to look at where he was sticking his head out the door. "Dude you gotta get back in here. We got a cake and a chocolate fountain and a twister board and pillows the size of Blaine!" We both laughed at that. "Come on! We're gunna shove our faces and then fight to the deaaaaaath!" He ran back inside the door slamming after him.
"Oh Jeffrey." I sighed. "He's like the fucking energizer bunny of bottle blondes." Kurt giggled.
"Be nice, you." He scolded, "Just because you aren't drunk and flopping all over me anymore doesn't mean you have to go back to being a snarky asshole."
"Awwww. But that is my natural state, babe."
"Liar. There is a good, sweet, kind man hiding in you somewhere Sebastian Smythe." He stood up and offered a hand to pull me up. I took it. His grasp was strong. I stood. "And I am determined to find him."
"You going to make an honest man of me, Hummel?"
"I can try."
"I look forward to that." He yanked me inside by the wrist. The boys where covered in chocolate. I laughed. "Jesus Christ you guys."
"Ug. Nuh uh. No way I am getting chocolate on this outfit. These jeans are designer."
"Don't worry, kurty." Jeff said, "I put down plastic on the floor so we can throw all the chocolate away before the pillow fight."
"My idea." Wes called out from the other side of the room where he was eating cake.
"Well. I am sitting on the couch where it is clean." Kurt exclaimed with a raise of his chin and stopped over to it and plopped down. Diva.
I watched him as he observed the others shoving their faces. To the casual observer his glare might be classified as judgmental but I saw that tongue reach out to lick his lip. Hot. So naturally I did what any teenage boy in the process of wooing their former frienemy would do. I went and got the Princess some chocolate. After picking out a selection of sweets I wandered over.
"Oh Kuuuurt." I sing-songed at him as I took my place next to him. He looked up to see me waving a chocolate covered strawberry in front of him teasingly. He zeroed in on it.
"Gimme. Gimme. Gimme." He made grabby hands at it. I chuckled and pulled it away bit to tease. He opened his mouth and tried to follow it to bite at it. God that was adorable. Finally I gave in and let him have it. He bit into it before taking it from my hand and finishing it off by himself with a moan. From cute to hot in one bite. Kurt Hummel what are you?
"Here I got you some cake too." I handed over the plate with my best disarming smile. He looked over at me as he took it.
"You weren't kidding about treating me like a Princess tonight were you?" I shook my head.
"Nope! You are Princess Hummel and I am your faithful servant." He giggled.
"I think you are still a little bit tipsy." He pointed at me with his fork so I grabbed it and stole a bite of his cake. "Hey!" He exclaimed stealing the fork back. "Worst servant ever. I should fire you."
"Aw don't say that, Princess." I fake pouted. "I'll even protect you during the pillow fight. I promise!" He giggled, setting aside his now finished cake plate and turning to me with a smirk.
"Mmm. My brave knight in shining armor." Fuck. I wanted to be his knight. I wanted to be the good guy. The hero. His hero.
"PILLLOOWW FIIIGHTTT!" I turned to see that the chocolate had been cleared away and that everyone was already armed with pillows of varying size. I stood quickly to protect Kurt and got a pillow in my face.
"Oof." I choked out as I caught it. I was about to sling it back at someone when I felt hands on my shoulders. I looked behind me to see Kurt standing up on the couch.
"Thanks for the offer, Seb." He said leaning over my shoulders to speak directing into my ear. "But this Princess can take care of himself." With that he stole the pillow I was holding and wacked me over the head.
"HEY!" I laughed as I ducked down out of his line of fire. He let out a war cry and jumped off the couch into the fray. I think I might be in love.
