Sookie's POV

I feel like a Bon Temps High School linebacker has plowed into me and knocked the wind right out of me.

"Sookie," Bill's husky voice continues, "You must understand even though I was sent here by the Queen, I came to love you with all that I have in me."

My eyes are full of tears that are threatening to flood down my face, but I will them to stay put-I don't want to let him see me cry.

"When were you going to tell me?" I gasp. I glance at Eric and his eyes look stony as he glares off into the distance.

I can't believe it. After 25 years, I found a man that I could love, and I loved him with my whole heart-he'd been my first everything: my first love, my first lover, my first. I force myself to stop thinking. It's too painful and I need to hear Bill's answer. I want him to tell me he had tried to but Rene, Jessica, and Dallas had gotten in the way.

I want him to lie to me.

I tilt my head to look him in the eyes and I wait for a response. His eyes are full of anguish and he finally whispers, "I was hoping you'd never know."

At that moment I hate him. I hate Eric for making him tell me. I hate the Queen. But, most of all, I hate myself for being so naïve. How could I have let him claim me so easily?

A light bulb goes off, "The blood. Why didn't you tell me your blood would make me sexually attracted to you? You told me it would increase my libido, but you didn't tell me it would make me attracted to you," I shake my head as my thoughts race around, "Don't get me wrong, I appreciate you saving my life, but if a few drops of Eric's blood would make me attracted to him, what kind of effect would so much of your blood have on me? Is that why you didn't tell me; because you were trying to seduce me for your Queen?"

Now rage is building in me and my body is shaking with tension. I clench my fists so hard that my nails cut into my palms, making them bleed. The scent of blood makes Eric turn around to face me and I expect to find glee on his face. Instead I see a well of sadness in his eyes that reminds me of dawn on the rooftop just a few days ago.

"Get out of here, Bill! I rescind your invitation!" I watch as he is pulled to the front door by forces I may never understand. His eyes look helpless and I can't help but wonder if I should have given him more credit for not lying to me. As the door slams shut, I shut that train of thought down immediately. He was my first, and it was just a scam.

The tears finally begin to roll, and it's not long before I start sobbing. I wrap my arms around myself, and I promise myself to never let someone in again so rashly.


Eric's POV

I thought this would be delightful. I thought I would feel triumphant. Instead I feel remorseful, and I'm overwhelmed with compassion for her.

Godric's passing has me reflecting on my human life from a thousand years ago, and suddenly I am reminded of how I felt when I told my wife the worst news imaginable: our first child had died. It wasn't as shocking then as it is now, but expected news can still be bitterly painful. I watch as Sookie hugs herself and even though the news isn't nearly as bad, it cuts her deeply.

Maybe it's because I can feel her pain so tangibly, thanks to my blood being in her, but I need to comfort her. Words fail me as I try to think of a way to explain it's better that she knows-even though it hurts.

"I wish it weren't true." They're the first words I speak since entering Sookie's home. I'm bewildered to discover I mean it wholeheartedly-I would do just about anything to wash away her suffering.

She looks at me, surprised, and her sobbing stops.

I take one step towards her and I cup her left cheek in my hand. I tilt her head upward, towards mine, "You deserve much better."

Before she can respond, I lower my lips to hers and give her a light kiss, and then I turn to leave.


Sookie's POV

If I wasn't shell-shocked before, I am now. After I watch Eric leave I collapse onto the couch, bury my face in my hands and begin crying again. It's going to be a long night.