A huge thank you to all those who have taken the time to review this fic. I'm glad you are enjoying reading my ideas about Lisbon's thoughts on life in Cannon River as she continues to think positively and make the best of her enforced new start.
I have rewritten and edited parts of this chapter so many times, I'm just going to go with it and move on to editing the next one.
Sadly I do not own The Mentalist, just the dvds.
08/20/13
Dear Jane,
I meant to write a few days ago but I took a short vacation. Yes I actually took some of my leave to go into the mountains and "experience the great outdoors" as the advertising brochures suggest. You know what a city girl like me thinks of open spaces but… I'm surprised to admit that it was wonderful, very peaceful and gave me time to think. I found a small family run hotel near the park and joined a small group following a couple of the trails they hand out to tourists, with experienced guides of course. You can do them on your own but I was not that daring. I suppose you might say I was carrying out background research for the forthcoming "tourist season" and perhaps you would be right. The guide told us there were bears around but we didn't see any, I'm glad to say. I've read the file but seeing one in its own territory that's another story.
The scenery was amazing and one afternoon the hotel owner suggested that I should drive a little way into the park towards the nearest lake, where there is a vantage point to watch the sunset. He said that as I was a first time visitor to the area I should go and watch a sunset. If I hadn't seen one here I was really missing out.
It took me a while to drive there as the roads were well signposted but of course unlit and far from straight. I got to the viewing spot, with its shelter and bench seat, looking out over a lake just as the blue sky began to fade to grey and then the most vibrant colours started to appear. The sky really did seem to be on fire; the colours fighting each other to see who would win; vivid golds, reds, pinks all jumbled up together, constantly changing with dark clouds moving amongst the colours and then absorbing them. The reflection on the water was truly amazing …and wonderful!
You know, while I watched I couldn't help but remember that night on Malibu Bluff. I know why you stopped there and in your letters you wrote that you were sorry for leaving me there… but I understand why you did. I really do. I found myself thinking the other night, that if that sunset I was watching was the last one I ever saw, then that would be alright because I had seen such beauty and perhaps I would never see its like again. Is that how you felt that night over two years ago?
Sorry Jane, you don't need to answer that I think I know what you would say? In fact… when I went back to my car I did check that I still had my phone, before driving back to the hotel, but of course I did. There was no one with me to pick my pocket!"
Teresa paused in her writing. She remembered watching till all the colours had gone, the sky turned dark, the moon rose and the stars began to appear. Reaching her car she had indeed checked for her phone and feeling it still in her pocket got in with a small laugh, took her keys out and then stopped with her hand on the key in the ignition.
"You have no idea how much you mean to me," she heard in her head, and moments later she was shaking and sobbing uncontrollably, still with her hand on the car key.
When she finally stopped she realised it was pitch black and driving back to the hotel was perhaps not the most sensible idea. She had a bag in the back of her car; it was advertised and handed out by the hotel as a walkers' survival kit consisting of water, chocolate, cereal bars, blankets, general first aid, flares for an absolute emergency and a torch. Apart from that Teresa also had a couple of apples that she had brought with her and of course her trusty Glock. In the trunk of her car was a rifle and as she remembered the information file on her desk about bears, she decided to retrieve that and keep it by her. Phoning the hotel she told them where she was and that she was safe, but had decided to stay out and watch the sunrise. She would return to the hotel in the morning.
Wrapping herself up in the blanket and enjoying the chocolate followed by an apple and half the water, she dropped the seat back and curled up to wait for the morning light, Glock and rifle ready to hand. "Poster girl for the NRA," Jane had once joked with her; she wondered what he'd think if he could see her now, alone in the middle of nowhere, wrapped up in a blanket with her weapons by her side and fully prepared for any curious bears that might be around.
Hours later she was surprised to realise that she had indeed slept, and woke up just as the first fingers of light crossed the sky. The sky was pale and grey until a thin ribbon of soft gold started to creep up behind the black outlines of the pine trees to the east. This gold gradually became pink and then red before a flare of the yellow sun began to appear in the gaps between trees. It was the dawn of a new day, a new chance at a new life.
Climbing out of the car still with the blanket wrapped around her she stretched her legs; her slight figure made her resemble a small child carrying their security blanket around with them. A few minutes watching the golden sun climbing above the trees she then finished the water, ate the cereal bar and the second apple. Teresa took a deep breath, turned her face to the warmth of the sun and felt calm, calm enough to drive back to the hotel.
"The Night Manager asked me to thank you for calling us last night. Are you alright, Ma'am?" the morning Receptionist asked her as she collected her key.
"Oh, yes, fine, thank you. You were right, that sunset was the most beautiful sight I think I have ever seen. It made me feel very emotional," she admitted. "I couldn't bear to come back without watching the sunrise too. Thank you for telling me about it. It's no wonder the tourists visit here each year."
"No indeed, Ma'am. Do you want me to bring some breakfast up to your room?"
"No thank you, I'll be fine. That survival pack is well stocked. On second thoughts, I'd love some strong coffee, then I'll just have a short rest and relax for the rest of the day."
"I'll see to that. Sleep well, Ma'am."
"I will and thank you once again."
Back in her own home and before returning to work the next day, Teresa finished her letter.
"So, Jane I have been a tourist in my own back yard.
Wayne and Grace were going to visit me in Cannon River, but unfortunately Maddie had a bit of a temperature and so they postponed their trip. It was a shame but we can meet up again in a couple of weeks after they've come back from visiting Grace's family.
I did make an apple pie and instead of having to share it with my guests I ate it myself. Well, not all at once. It was really quite good and with all the apples on the tree I think I'm going to have to do some more cooking. Either that or Milly can have a few bags of them again. The only problem is that everyone's apple trees are laden, and the locals are much better than I at creating recipes to use them up. The Police Office often has various offerings, especially from Officer Phelps' wife who is an excellent cook.
Officer Phelps; Joe, is my deputy, a local man, married to a local woman; Stacey. Thinking about it; everyone here apart from me seems to have been born and brought up in Cannon River. They say everything they need is here so why move away. When I first came here, I was worried that they would be suspicious of me as an outsider, but everyone was very welcoming and I got invited round for meals by different families almost every week. Last Thanksgiving I got three invitations and so as not to cause any offence, I refused them all. This was not accepted and my hosts got together and arranged the meal in the local hotel, each of them bringing a course. I didn't want or need to eat for days after. I think this year I might go back to Chicago and see Tommy and Annabeth. It will be good to spend some time with them and I won't have to offend anyone here by accepting one invitation and refusing others. We'll see.
After all the invitations I felt rather embarrassed that my cooking attempts were not in the same league as the locals but when I invited Joe and Stacey round, she told me not to worry about the main course and arrived with a huge steak casserole, large enough to feed the whole town in reality.
I had made a green salad and remembered how to mix the dressing my Mom used to make. I had also gone to the store out of town and bought a lemon tart that we had with ice cream. I suspect they knew it was not home-made but were too polite to say anything.
At the end of the meal Stacey told me to keep the extra casserole and freeze it, so I have enjoyed several more meals of it.
I hope the food you are getting is to your liking and you are eating well. Before you were taken away from our last meeting I remember you saying that you didn't mind the detention suite as long as you could make a cup of tea. Some of your teas had exotic and strange sounding names, perhaps you have some of them with you.
While I was in the mountains, with all that peace and quiet I did think that perhaps you didn't want me to write to you so… and as I hadn't heard anything from you…if that is how you feel, just let me know through Abbott. If I don't hear I will continue telling you about my new home town and how good life here is.
I do hope you are thinking carefully about the offer from Abbott then you can start rebuilding your life. I watched the sunrise and it made me realise that each day we have the chance to start afresh, to make a new start and go on.
Teresa"
The letter posted, Teresa was at her desk a few days later, drinking her third cup of coffee, when Henry's anxious voice was heard on the other side of the open office door.
"I'll make sure it's delivered to her."
Even though he was perfectly capable as her assistant, Henry seemed to worry about anything that was new to him and his voice would rise nervously. What was it Jane always said about a raised pitch… oh yes…it meant the person was lying. Not in Henry's case... he didn't have a dishonest bone in his body… just lacked self-confidence.
"Chief Lisbon?"
"Come in, Henry. What's the problem?"
Henry poked his head around the door with that slightly haunted look. How did the Chief always know when he thought there was a problem? She hadn't even seen him; it was a little unnerving really.
"This envelope has just been delivered, Chief." Lisbon tipped her head to one side and opened her eyes wide, which Henry had learned, meant she wanted him to go on. "It's from the… F… B… I," he continued almost in a whisper.
"O.K., Henry."
"It's addressed to you and marked Private and Confidential in capital letters. I'll bring it in, should I?"
"Yeah, that will be good, Henry. Thank you."
Teresa remembered when Abbott had first visited her in Cannon River and Henry had uttered the initials of the agency in the same way. She hadn't quite decided whether he was fearful of it, fascinated by it or simply in awe of it.
Henry reappeared at her door with the envelope in question and holding it at arm's length placed it on her desk.
"Thank you, Henry, I'll take it from here. You know…" she stopped herself from saying that two years ago she might have worried about the contents of a letter marked Private and Confidential, wondering at the contents and whether they related to a serious crime. Henry didn't need to know that. That was the great thing about Cannon River, serious crime was… non-existent really, certainly compared to Lisbon's past experience. Living in Chicago and Sacramento, she had never thought there would be places where life was this… gentle a pace.
"You alright, Chief?"
"You know … could you get me another coffee, I'd really appreciate that."
Henry nodded; "My Mom sent in some Dutch Apple cake, can I bring you a slice? She made it last night and it's real tasty."
Lisbon smiled, a warm smile that Henry knew was a rare event, and nodded. The Chief was so serious most of the time, although his Mom said she had lovely eyes and how surprised she was that there wasn't a "Mr" Lisbon.
"I'll get it now," and with that Henry disappeared back to the outside office and the coffee machine.
On his return just a few moments later he was surprised by his Chief's expression. Henry did not have a great deal of experience with women and the Chief, although small in stature had a commanding, if not frightening presence at times, but he could see something was very wrong. The smile had gone, there were three vertical lines above her nose and her eyes were red-rimmed. For a moment he thought she might be about to cry and he didn't think he wanted to be in the office if that happened. She had opened the envelope from the FBI and lying on her desk beside it were three white envelopes that must have been inside.
"Thank you, Henry." Her voice was almost a whisper.
"Can I get you anything else, Chief," Henry asked as he put the plate of apple cake and coffee mug carefully on the desk, trying very hard not to stare at her.
"No. No thank you, I'll just get on with my paper work. Can you close the door for me please, I need to concentrate on the figures for the next budget meeting and I might need to make some calls."
Once Henry had gone, Teresa's gaze fell on the three white envelopes all clearly marked with the handwritten single word; "UNDELIVERED".
She continued to stare in shock at the three envelopes lying on her desk:
"My letters. They haven't even opened them."
