Token: Could you tell ur friend to stop looking creepy at the entrance? He's freaking out the other guests

Kenny: Don't worry our favorite gay is on the mission ;D

Token: But u are the friend u should go 2

Kenny: Sorry I can't hear ya

Kenny: Loud music and shit

Token: Bitch

Craig had plenty of reasons for not wanting to help Stan Marsh.

1- Stan was a whiny baby when he got drunk and depressed because of Kyle. And he drank when he was sad, so.

2- He wanted to spend the night flirting with his sexy boyfriend, not listening to Stan's speech for the 38650 time.

3- He was still pissed with Stan because he called him at 3 am in that same week.

4- He didn't wanted to go.

But Tweek asked him to go for a while because he felt sorry for Stan, so all of his excuses got stucked on his throat under a "just a second won't kill me". The things he done for his sweetheart.

"Are you puking?" Was the first thing he asked after finding Stan sitting under a tree on the entrance. The boy was wearing his trademark hat and a old shirt from the school's football team, wich he got out in the year before that one. Stan was that kind of person that looks like a random mix of human traits, wich gave shape to an alcoholic jock addicted to philosophy that wrote about life's absurdity on his spare time.

"This joke is not funny, you know? Is like joking about you and PDA." Stan shrugged, typing on his cellphone. "I'm sober. What you doing here, anyway?"

"Kenny told me to babysit you."

"I just want to be alone for a while, goddamit!"

"On a party?" Craig raised an eyebrown, staring at him. "C'mon Marsh, cut the crap and tell me what your super duper best friend did this time."

"Can't I be on a bad mood without having anything to do with Kyle?" Stan mumbled, hugging his knees.

"Yeah, but for you this is just called normal life." Craig sat at his side, deciding that he'd wait for a minute and then...

"A girl from my club told me that she saw Cartman and Kyle making out at the gym."

Ok, now there weren't a lot of things in life that could make Craig Tucker laugh, but that single quote made into the list without a blink.

"Are you on fucking drugs?" He asked, trying to breath and regain composure. "For real Stan, you really believe that those two would do something? What this girl told you exactly?"

"That she saw Kyle pinning Cartman against a wall! That makes sense you know? People say that hate could result on sexual tension, and Cartman did a lot of weird things with Kyle back when we were kids!"

"Ok, let's try to think about this rationally." Craig started with one of his most memorable quotes. "Pinning against a wall? Kyle was probably trying to kill him. They're friends for some weird reason that I'll never understand, but I don't think that goes all way over wanting to bang. You should ask Kyle and done, case solved." Stan was quiet for a while, until getting up and heading towards the house.

"Can you get me a beer so we can start the fun, Tucker?"

"Do it yourself, bitch."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

On the living room, a blonde teenager chocked on guilt while Wendy and Bebe accommodated at the couch. The dark-haired girl was wearing a purple sweater with a black skirt, while the blonde chose a red dress with a black jacket. The truth was, he didn't cared a lot for Stan's situation (that repeated itself almost every week), but he was in desperate need of advice, so that excuse appeared on perfect timing.

"So Tweek, what do you need from us?" Wendy asked, offering a gentle smile.

"I was...was...ngn... wanting an advice." His hands weren't shaking, but they were moving so fast on his lap that it probably looked like this.

"You kidding me? We should be the ones asking for advice baby!" Bebe laughed, waving at her current-boyfriend Clyde. "Teach me how to make my relationship with your silly friend last like yours!"

"And teach me how to pick a new boyfriend that doesn't have the hots for his best friend." Wendy added, and the girls giggled. The dark-haired girl broke up with Stan almost a year before, and the gossip around school was that the reason involved his preference towards a certain ginger.

"I'm not good at giving advice girls!" He moved his arms frantically.

"We're just messing with you, relax." Bebe explained. "Voice your problems and we'll help you!"

"Considering your blushing face I'd say that is something about sex?" Wendy guessed, and Tweek only nodded. "Just because you're gay, doesn't mean you have to talk with girls, ok Tweek? I'm sure that your friends could help you too."

"I know! But hm... The question that I have is about things that you...could... have more experience?" God, that was so embarassing. He could talk about dirty things for sure, but was usually when Craig was around or without giving too much detail.

"Ah he wants to know about being fucked." The boy gasped at how nonchalant Bebe sounded saying that.

"C'mon, you don't need to be embarassed, ok? Is better if you wanna know before doing it." Wendy reassured, offering him a soda can.

"Is just that I'm afraid on doing something wrong, you know? I looked online and even trained a little bit to feel less embarassed, but what if hurts a lot and I end up making Craig feel guilty? Once he accidentally slammed the door against my face because he didn't saw me and he spent the whole day apologizing! It wasn't even hurting anymore! And what if something really embarassing happens? It already happened today! God, I sound like a lunatic!"

"Relax boy." Bebe tried to confort him. "Is totally normal to be nervous with your first time. Guess we're all a little bit Tweek when it comes to this subject. Actually, let me tell you a secret: Last week, me and Clyde were on his bedroom and things were going towards the funny stuff. But then he got so frustrated trying to open my bra and failing that he started to cry and say that he was a terrible boyfriend and shit."

"That's so... Clyde." Tweek said, staring at the flamboyant boy that was currently dancing next to Tokend and Jimmy and wanting to give him a pat on the shoulder.

"I know right? Is kinda cute or I'm just really falling in love for that dummy." Bebe giggled, sending a kiss to her boyfriend.

"The point here is that we can't help you a lot since we're also virgins but is normal having worries and expectations." Wendy finished. "But come to talk with us whenever you want."

"Ah here you are." Craig interrupted, sitting next to his boyfriend. "Can I take the seat, mister?"

"I think is too late to ask." Tweek giggled, leaning towards his body.

"And I think this is our time to leave. Have fun, boys!" Bebe took her best friend by the arm, going to the kitchen. "Wendy?"

"Yes?"

"He really said that he was training?"

"Yes."

"#NaughtyTweekConfirmed?" The both girls grinned.

"Yes."