Close.

I was close.

She paints her nails with rattlesnake venom. That's normal. Mind you it makes a spectacular colour. This amazing shimmering scarlet red. I may have to steal some from her before I leave. Apart from that she seemed dead nice. She had red hair which she wore in a plait that snaked down her back, and cowgirl attire. Like I said about Mr. Sir; stylish. She explained about the camp and how she was the all feared Warden.

"…just a pretence I uphold to keep the boys in line,"

I nodded politely as she told me about herself and how her and my mum got along when they were kids.

"So Rachel," she said in her amazing Texas accent "What have you been up to in your life?" she asked kindly. I paused, god my life was boring. I didn't have anything incredibly interesting to tell her, except maybe…

"Well I flooded a coffee shop with milk on my first day of work," I said munching on a cheese sandwich she had made me. She looked surprised for a moment and then smiled.

"Well then, I guess you'll fit in fine here then," she said "You'll get along great with the other criminals," she smiled. I hesitated for a moment, but I longed to ask her.

"Why didn't my mum tell me that this wasn't a summer camp?" I asked eventually. Aunt Lou studied me for a moment then shrugged,

"You probably wouldn't have come if you knew what it really is," she suggested.

"But why did she want me to come in the first place?" I wondered out loud.

"Let us not worry about that for now Rachel. Now that you're here, how long are you planning on staying?" I saw her eyes flick to my many suitcase which Mr. Sir and the guard had heaved in. But now I knew that instead of water skiing and chilling by the lake, I would be hanging with criminals and social workers I wasn't too thrilled about spending three months here.

"I don't know. I need to ring mum now that…the situation has changed, see what she has to say about it. After that who knows?" I worded my sentence carefully, I didn't want to offend my long lost Aunt after all this time and finally meeting her.

"Well," she said smiling and showing pointed teeth "If you ring her now the sooner we'll know," I nodded and walked outside to find some signal. Nearly falling into a hole I swore. That was close, I could've broken something.

Like my phone.

I dialled the home number and waited for it to pick up.

"Hello darling," answered my dad "How's camp going?"

"Put my so called mother on dad. She sent me to a detention Camp,"

"Oh I'm sure it's not all that ba-"

"Put mum on," I demanded across his reasoning.

"Hello dear," my mother's voice said "how are things?

"Oh perfect," I answered sarcastically "The criminals are treating me wonderfully and I discovered that if I don't get bitten by a deadly lizard I can always die from heatstroke and dehydration instead, so no worries there,"

"Rachel listen, you must under-"

"What were you thinking sending me here? It's full of crazy ass weirdo's and arsonists!" I cried saying the first crime that came to my mind. "You simply must come and pick me up this instant. I refuse to stay here any longer."

Stuff being rude to Aunt Lou, I was hysterical by now. Hearing my parents' voices in their nice air conditioned, lizard free home made me miss the finer, normal things in life.

"Listen to me Rachel. It's all for a good reason," she said. Oh this better be good, or else I was calling Childline.

"Oh do tell,"

"You know your Aunt and I had a minor fall out?" she continued. I snorted, doubting minor was the correct use of word here. "Well, it wasn't so minor. The family business we disagreed on. That was Camp Green Lake. Well kind of family business. Anyways, that camp means so much to her, and basically…I don't. If I turned up there and started trying to build the relationship that we both shredded into pieces, she'd probably hate me even more. Maybe even accuse me of trying to steal the business now that it is so successful." her voice was high pitched and hysterical, practically forcing me to understand.

"Right, that's all good and fine, but where does the 'lying to your only daughter and sending her to an all-boys criminal Camp' fit into all this?" I asked, with a hint of accusation still present in my voice.

"Well…because I so much want to be on speaking terms with my sister. I thought she couldn't refuse her niece in her time of need," (AKA my boredom) "so I thought you could maybe put in a good word for me while you are there. And you know, by the time three months is up, you'll have convinced her that I'm a trusting, loving person who only wants her as a sister and not as a potential business partner."

"So…I'm like…your secret weapon or something?" I asked trying to clear the air. I heard uncomfortable shuffling on the other end of the line.

"Yeah," she finally answered. "So what do you say? Will you do this for me? Will your give your mother her only sister back?" she asked, nearly pleaded. I thought about it. Three months in a hot animal/criminal infested desert with nothing to do except paint your nails with snake venom and dig holes, or three months at home, with whiny parents, an annoying little brother and nothing to do. Ooh tough one.

"Put Noah on mum," I sighed

"Why?" she asked uncertainly

"Because if I'm not going to see him for three months I'd like to say goodbye," I said giving in. I'd missed seeing him as he'd been at summer school when I caught my bus here.

"Oh really? Are you going to do this for me?" she asked beyond happily. After five more minutes of this I had convinced her that I was actually going to be a spy for her, I then spoke to Noah, then my dad, and returned back into the log cabin.

"Aunt Lou?" I called, she was nowhere in sight. Then she appeared in a doorway and smiled.

"Yes?"

"Change of plan. I'm staying. Is that still okay?" I asked. The plan would be down the pan if she had changed her mind.

"No of course not darling. You can stay as long as you wish. It'll be wonderful to have some female company." she answered sweetly. I inwardly sighed in relief, although I couldn't help thinking her sweetness was sarcastic "Now that you're staying, I'll get Pendanski to show you around." she said, and I wondered what a Pendanski was.

Turned out it was a very strange man, with, (surprise surprise) a cowboy hat on! He was jumping around and explaining things to me. I was half listening until he suggested I meet the campers. That got me nervous. I was bad enough meeting new normal people. I didn't know how I'd cope with new bad people. I took a deep breath and he brought me to the first tent. After a few more I was beginning to see a pattern emerging. He'd introduce me in the same way, they'd react in the same way, then he'd introduce them in the same way, then they'd react again in the same way. He stopped outside another and looked at me with what I imagined was his 'proud look' and said.

"I'm the counsellor for this tent. These boys are under my charge," he smiled a goofy grin. "They may not be perfect, but they're mine," I inwardly puked. How ridiculously soft was this guy?

"Okay," I said in a fake cheery voice. He was none the wiser.

"Welcome to D tent," he said pulling back the tent flap. "The D is for Diligence!" he called happily.