Chalk Farm, 14 February

Another year, another Valentine's day alone. And it's all my fault, Barbara thought gloomily.

It was not that she was particularly fond of Valentine's day. Another commercial event, organized by the lobbies of florists, chocolate makers, cards sellers and the like she suspected. Still it would be nice not to be alone on that special day. All the more since a little voice at the back of her head kept reminding her that she could have had the best Valentine possible.

It's been three weeks since Lynley was back at work and he acted as if they had never had this conversation in his bedroom. Barbara didn't know what to make of this. She knew he wasn't the one to accept defeat so easily; she had seen him with Helen, he had used all his charm on her till she fell in his arms. Why wasn't he doing the same thing with her? Why was he accepting defeat so easily?

Because he doesn't really love you, stupid.

The explanation was obvious and simple but inside her she couldn't accept it.

Why do you care? You rejected his gift, you rejected his love when he offered it, the pesky voice insisted mercilessly. Do you wish you hadn't?

'I don't know!' she cried out loud.

Knock! Knock, knock!

The sound made her jump. One knock followed by two more rapid. Lynley's signature. What was he doing at her door in the evening? Quickly, she put the leftovers of her dinner in the fridge and gave the table a wipe. Her heart was racing in her chest

Knock! Knock, knock!

Louder this time.

'Havers?'

'Coming!' she yelled back.

She threw a circular look around the room - no knickers in sight – and went to open the door.

He was standing on her doorstep, his umbrella in one hand and an enormous bunch of red roses in the other.

'Good evening, Barbara.'

'Evenin', sir.'

'May I come in? The rain's pretty cold.'

'Sure, I'd never forgive myself if you fell ill again.'

'Thank you.'

'Give me your umbrella,' she said, seeing him struggling to close it.

'I'd rather you take the flowers, if you don't mind.'

'Who are they for?' she asked as he followed her inside.

Tommy certainly didn't expect that question; the most complete surprise was written on his face.

'They're for you, Barbara.'

'Me?'

'It would be boorish of me to come and see a woman with a bunch of flowers for someone else, wouldn't it? Happy Valentine's Day.'

Barbara's jaw dropped.

'Valentine…Me?'

Tommy smiled.

'Yes, you. I didn't think you would be so surprised; not after I opened my heart to you the other day.'

'And then you didn't say anything for three weeks! I thought it was over, chapter closed.'

Lynley had his eyes riveted on her, and she felt he was reading her soul, laying it bare.

'You thought I regretted telling you I loved you.'

She was about to protest when she realized it was pointless; he knew her too much.

'Yeah, it crossed my mind,' she admitted reluctantly. She put the roses down on her table a bit abruptly, creasing the delicate petals.

'You really have a low opinion of me.'

'What did you expect? You were so unsure of your feelings you used a trick to give me a necklace without me knowing who gave it to me.'

'Not one of my cleverest ideas, I must admit, but my feelings were true.'

'You're talking in the past tense,' she remarked acidly.

'Are true; my feelings are true. I wouldn't be here otherwise. '

She eyed him intensely during a long moment. Tommy barely dared breathe. Finally, she said:

'I don't want to hide. I don't want to be your toy, or the one you turn to when there's nobody better around.'

'Barb…'

'Let me finish. I'd love to be your Valentine, to go out with you but there'll be a time when you are ashamed of me.'

'No,…'

'Just keep quiet! You'll be ashamed of how I look, how I speak, how I eat my asparagus, whatever. You'll want to keep me hidden from your family and your friends. Don't. Never. If you don't feel good with me by your side, as your girlfriend, let's call it a day and go our separate ways. If you're not ready to be honest about you and me, forget it.'

By the time she finished she was almost as red as the roses. An awkward silence grew between them. Barbara started fiddling with the ribbon that bound the roses.

'Can I speak now?' Lynley asked.

She threw him a dark look but nodded her agreement.

'First of all, I will never, NEVER, be ashamed of you.'

'Wait...'

'Now it's your time to listen, Barbara. I never wanted to hide my feelings for you; I had planned more than the necklace but with the season's holidays and my bronchitis I didn't find the time before you found out about the emerald. I've never wanted to hurt you. I don't want you to be my toy, I want you to be my girlfriend. I love you, Barbara, and I want the world to know it. I promise to always be honest with you, for better and for worse.'

'No hiding?'

'No hiding.'

'I want so much to believe you…' she said in a cracked voice.

'Believe me then, believe me. I brought you something. Maybe it will convince you I'm sincere.'

From the inner pocket of his rain coat he took out a small case and handed it to Barbara.

'Another gift?' she asked as she took the case.

'An old one I improved.'

She opened the case and smiled.

'You had it cut.'

Inside the case, on a red sating cushion was her necklace. The emerald cut in a pear shape was sparkling with glints of the deepest green.

'It's beautiful,' Barbara said.

'Like you. Will you accept it now?'

'Are you sure you want me to? Everybody will know who gave it to me.'

'I do hope so,' he replied cheerfully, 'it may be helpful to fend off any other suitor.'

'I've no other suitor.'

She smiled at him.

'Would you help me fasten it?'

'With pleasure.'

He took the jewel from its case and put it around her neck as she held her hair away from her nape. When his fingers brushed her skin, she came out in goose pimples. Softly he kissed her neck and felt her body gave itself up to his caress.

When she turned around to face him, her eyes were glittering as much as the emerald.

'Thank you, Tommy. This is the best Valentine's day of my life.'

'This is only the first, Barbara.'

Gently he cupped her face and kissed her. Her lips were soft but she was a bit clumsy at the beginning. He put his arms around her waist and drew her to him. Gradually she relaxed and started to kiss him back. They stayed a long moment embraced in silence until Tommy said:

'I love you, Barbara.'

'I love you too. No more hiding then?'

He didn't reply and went to open the door. For a second Barbara feared he was leaving but he just stepped outside under the rain and shouted as loudly as he could:

'I'M IN LOVE WITH BARBARA HAVERS !'

He heard her chuckled in his back and he was happy. When he closed the door again, he knew he was at home.