AN: I'm overwhelmed by all your kind reviews. This is the final chapter of this story but don't worry, I already have some other fics planned out. Please review. But most importantly, enjoy.
Lyrics are from Pearl Jam's "Just Breathe" (Fun fact: This song has always been one of my absolute favorites and I basically freaked out when they used it in the finale. And during what a scene, too.)
Shock. That had been the first. Then astonishment. Wonder.
Relief. It's not just me then. Desire. Longing. Always more and more and more. So this is how addiction starts. Pleasure and thrill and defeat and anxiety and exuberance.
And finally loss. The instant he had pulled away. The instant his lips had left hers.
Raymond Reddington's kiss had triggered an avalanche of emotions.
What do you feel now, Lizzie?
She had felt love.
Did I say that I want you?
Did I say that I need you?
He hadn't planned this. Had fantasized about it in the secluded corners of his mind. Had irrationally wished for it. Dreamed about it even. But he hadn't planned this.
Raymond Reddington didn't lose control. Raymond Reddington didn't succumb to his impulses.
But her closeness was intoxicating and her eyes were wistful and he was weak.
So he had kissed her. And she had responded.
And when he had finally pulled away and noticed the look on her face, he was certain. It's not just me then.
And Lizzie had whispered, "Let's go home."
Nothing you would take
Everything you gave
The crackling sounds of the fireplace encircled them; the soft cushions of the hazel leather couch enticed them to unwind. They sat close to each other, hands entwined. Exhausted, but awake. Once again silent. No words could have satisfactorily captured the events of the night. Their feelings. Their expectations.
The car ride back to the mansion had been uneventful, mostly. Liz had observed the passing city lights and Red had watched her out of the corner of his eye. He wouldn't let her out of his sight.
Neither had mentioned the kiss. Both had hoped for another.
The two of us have overcome so much.
"May I see them?" Liz's voice was barely audible, but echoed through the room nonetheless. Red flinched. Let go of her hand.
A question, at last. Yet not the one he was prepared for.
There would be no going back after this. She would insist on an explanation. And he would offer it and live with the consequences.
He owed her the truth.
Once again he was facing the prospect of Elizabeth Keen leaving and it scared him to death.
You can turn away and run from it. You can hide from it. And if you choose to do that, I'll fly away. Or you can face it, confront it. Engage it. And maybe- maybe prevail and rise above it.
With his eyes fixed on the ceasing flames in front of him- oh, sweet irony- he began dismantling the armor. His vest and tie. Finally, his shirt. Button after button. The white fabric hanging loosely over his shoulders now. He turned around.
"Go ahead."
Liz moved closer and carefully pulled the shirt off his back. Inhaled deeply. Prepared herself.
Her trembling fingers hovered over his short hair, the crook of his neck, his right shoulder. And paused. Red kept still.
Waited.
Anticipated.
When he finally sensed her breath on his burned skin, he felt shivers running down his spine. Felt his scars mend at the touch of her fingertips. Intimacy.
Liz explored every inch of the scarred flesh. Details, patterns. Every dent a revelation, every contact an apology. She could feel the intense throbbing in her wrist. A connection.
And then it stopped.
Why she had decided to walk down the hall towards Raymond Reddington's bedroom in the middle of the night was finally clear to her.
Under everything
Just another human being
The first time she had laid eyes on him he had been handcuffed to a chair. And she had been intrigued.
He had called her "Lizzie". She had corrected him. And he had smiled.
The first time she had laid eyes on him he had been Number Four on the Most Wanted List. And nothing more.
Now she was tracing the outlines of his pain and posing the inevitable question.
"You saved me?"
Silence.
"Red, did you save me?"
"Yes."
And she felt the room spinning and her world crumbling. Saw him turn. Looked into his worried eyes and ran her hand across his pensive features. Leaned in and gently pressed her lips to his- just the ghost of a kiss- and got up from the couch.
Stay with me
Let's just breathe
Life could have ended there and then. Red wouldn't have objected. But he was still alive, maybe more than ever, and he watched her walk down the hall. Reflected. And finally followed. She could never fully grasp the power she had over him.
He found her standing in the middle of his bedroom. Determined, expectant. And he began to wonder.
Maybe this was always supposed to happen. Maybe it had all led up to this. From the moment Red had surrendered the first time, to their dinner in Montreal, their handholding on the bench, the attack on the blacksite, his sacrifice, her pleading, his escape and return, her red dress, their dance in the embassy, the music box, to Red surrendering the second time.
Fate.
She was still here with him. In spite of his wrongdoings. In spite of his flaws. Of his sins.
All of his doubts vanished into thin air. All questions disappeared. She was all that mattered.
Liz was watching him. Tried to read his thoughts.
Didn't miss the twitch under his left eye. Didn't miss the flash of lust in his gaze.
And she took off her shirt and he took in the stunning vision that was Elizabeth Keen and the black lace and her glowing skin and he had to remind himself to keep breathing.
One step.
Two steps.
All distance gone.
And he kissed her with all the desire in the world. Picked her up. I have you. And lowered her to the bed.
Surrendered.
-THE END-
