"Gatsby, c'mon, kitty-kitty," I called quietly into the darkness and waited to ear the soft patter of his running feet. After five minutes he still didn't come.

Obviously must be upset with me over the screaming fiasco, I thought, shutting the screen door but keeping watch.

Cin had left already with a quick hug and a promise to call Sunday afternoon when she returned from the Cape. The guys hadn't ever shown, and Gatsby didn't seem to want my company. Stifling a shiver, I wrapped my arms around myself. I wasn't cold so much as unsettled. This disturbing dream thing along with that horror movie had me all messes up.

Unconsciously I searched the wooded area behind my house, checking between the low hanging branched that smelled of peppermint, their leaves soft as butterfly kisses.

Would he be out there? The man who watched me in the dream.

A noise like crunching leaves pulled my head in its direction. My heart beat fast like a thumping rabbit. Something moved. Opening the screen door, I stepped out onto the small terrace, "Here kitty-kitty," I called hearing the strangled fear in my voice.

The noise grew intense. I'd let the screen door slam behind me, and now reached back, grabbing the handle. Opening it, I put a hand to my throat.

If it is the man, what should I do? I won't be safe in the house. I so needed a cell phone.

I was about to turn when two guys stumbled out of the trees and fell onto the grass, laughing uproariously. A scream escaped my lips before I could stop it. I clamped a hand over my mouth, realizing it was just Micheal and Danial. That's what my eyes told me; the rest of me was frozen in fear. I wanted to laugh with them. They'd only been teasing; it's what they did. I'd done it to them on more than one occasion: snuck into their yard and scared them.

"You should have seen your face," Micheal said, rising and coming toward me. "I should've taken a picture." Tears streaming down his face from laughing so hard. Daniel was in a similar state. I still couldn't move.

In the dream, Liam had been holding the bloody heart, the heart of my true love. The brothers had been tossing it around like a football. And I'd tasted it. The remembered feeling of pleasure washed through me.

"How-how could you?" I stammered, tears filling my eyes and streaming down my cheeks. "You know I'm all alone. You could have been a psychotic murder." I rushed into the house, letting the screen door bang behind me.

I'd seen their stricken faces and knew they hadn't meant to do any harm, but I couldn't act rationally. Sobs wracked my body and snot dripped from my nose. I ran up the stairs past my parent's unused bedroom and the bathroom and finally stopped at my room. Flinging open the door, I launched myself onto the bed and buried my head in the purple pillows. A gigantic meltdown was coming. The dream had started it and the guys scaring me ignited it. Now there'd be no stopping it.

All my sadness, my loneliness, my pent up hurts and fears seemed to crash into me. Wave after horrible wave...

Why had my mother died? Why had my father remarried such a cold, uncaring women? Why did they have to leave me alone all the time? Why did my dad chose her over me? Why was I such a dork?

The questions went unanswered, probably always would. My life was what it was, and most of the time, I accepted it, even enjoyed it. Right now was not one of those times. I'd fallen into my enormous chasm of hurt and allowed myself to sink in.

"Hey, is there a pity party going on in here?"

At the sound of his rough voice I stiffened. There was a thud, and I felt the bed give as four soft paws jumped up.

"Gatsby invited me. I hope you don't mind if I join you?"

Two feelings swirled through my heart at once: relief and embarrassment.

Relief because I was glad he'd come and brought Gatsby so I wouldn't be alone.

Embarrassment because I was a blubbering mess and he'd see me, and I'd never be able to look him in the face again.

Casually wiping my eyes and nose on my pillowcase, I said, "Ryan, what are you doing here?"

The bed dipped as he sat. His warm skin so close to mine sent tingles through my belly.

"I told you Gatsby invited me, and I never miss a pity party, especially not one thrown by my beautiful best friend, Snowflake." There was laughter in his voice. He was trying to make me feel better, but that wasn't the point of a pity party. You weren't suppose to feel better. It was about misery, and that's what I wanted. Him saying I was beautiful just added to the many waves of hurt. It wasn't true, and having him rub that in didn't help.

"Go away." I said.

He answered by scooting closer, and I felt my body respond to his nearness. "I'll go away when I know you're feeling better. Master Splinter knows I'm here. He also had Micheal and Daniel on bathroom duty tomorrow. He wanted me to be sure to tell you that."

"Huh," was all I could utter, though I had to smile. "Serves them right." I sniffled.

He shifted his weight and pushed me over slightly, then I felt something fall over me. It was the quilt my mother made. Tears filled my eyes again and I squeezed them shut.

"Now, I'm just going to lie down next to you until you fall asleep. I've already locked up the house, but I'll lock the back door when I leave, okay?" I heard Gatsby growl, and the thud when Ryan dropped him to the floor. The bed shifted as he got comfortable.

Then the was only breathing.

He meant it. Ryan was just going to lie there with me. I took a deep breath and relaxed. It reminded me of our overnighters when we were younger, sleeping out on the trampoline in our sleeping bags. The four of them and I all started out at normal distance from each other, but by morning we'd slid into the middle, a pajama-clad mash up of arms and legs.

I'd always been the first to wake up and I'd lie there, listening to them breathing, and wish that was how we could be every night. Me and my brothers, sleeping under the stairs.

But my stepmother pointed out that they weren't really my brothers. They were boys, and all boys only had one thing on their brain. By the time we turned ten, the sleepovers had ended.

After a while, I fell asleep.

In my dreams there were arms wrapped protectively around me, my back turned against his chest, legs intertwined. I heard a whisper. "snow, my Snow. You aren'y alone."

My heart soared with happiness in the dream and I whispered back, "Ryan don't leave me."

"Never, Snowflake."