"Tsurumaru-dono, good afternoon."
"Hmm? Is it Ichigo? Have you returned from the final Sortie?" turning his gaze towards the soft voice calling to his name, a smile was drawn on Tsurumaru Kuninaga's face upon finding the light blue hair standing next to him, "So, how was it?"
"We have successfully completed the last mission. At last, the war with the Historical Revisionists is over," returning the other's smile, Ichigo Hitofuri settled down next to him, "What about you, Tsurumaru-dono? Weren't you assigned on an Expedition?"
"Likewise, our team has also accomplished the final task. In fact, I have just returned not so long ago," replied Tsurumaru calmly. Returning his gaze to the Citadel's large pond before him, several cherry blossom petals seemed to fall onto the water surface one after another.
At his composed gesture, the blue hair was prompted to do the same. For a short while, the two of them remained in tranquility.
"…It's finally time, isn't it?" all of a sudden, Ichigo Hitofuri broke the silence, "Tomorrow, we will not be able to see this scenery ever again."
"Yeah."
"The Master would have to return us to where we are supposed to belong. I wonder if our soul will remain in the swords and live on…? It's quite curious."
"That's true.
"Tsurumaru-dono," his golden eyes looked at the other's, "Don't you feel anything at all?"
"Hmm? Whatever do you mean by that?"
"Although I am glad that we manage to accomplish our purpose for coming here, I feel miserable to be separated from my brothers. I'm very happy that I can live together with them like this, but once we are returned to our respective places, we might not be able to see each other again."
"…"
"And…" he continued, now casting his gaze down, "Even though we aren't bound as a family, when I think that tomorrow I will not see Tsurumaru-dono again, I…"
"Do you feel sad that you can't see me anymore, Ichigo?"
"Don't you, Tsurumaru-dono?" the blue hair returned his question, but instead of answering, the crane pulled him into his arms and embraced his so tightly that Ichigo thought he might suffocate.
"I feel so miserable," contrary to the composed tone he'd been using up till a few moments ago, Tsurumaru's voice sounded restrained, "But as strange as it might seem, at the same time I feel happy that you say that. Have you come to love me back, Ichigo?"
"Of course I have!"
"Can you tell me that you love me?"
"I love you," with a face full of certainty, the blue hair looked up at the man in front of him, "I love you, Tsurumaru-dono."
"And so do I. Ichigo Hitofuri, I love you so very much."
Their lips met each other's as they engaged in a tender, yet passionate kiss. Their eyes, shining with the same gold color, gazed at each other's as though they were locked until the crane softly touched Ichigo's face.
"If we are born in another life," he whispered in a gentle voice, "Are you still willing to be my lover?"
"Of course. I sincerely wish for us to meet again," replied the blue hair; a sad, yet loving smile drawn on his face.
"Then, it's a promise," Tsurumaru kissed the back of his lover's hand, "If we are ever to meet again, I will propose to you with exactly the same words I have said to you in this life. At that time, I hope your feelings for me have not changed."
It was already sunset by the time Tsurumaru arrived at the building where Ichigo lived. As he parked his car and dropped off the ride, he looked around to find no journalists lurking around the vicinity. And yet it only meant that they managed to hide themselves well. In a few minutes, he was sure there would be articles online about him visiting his "rumored lover" again.
"There's no way they'd miss spotting my car here."
The white hair paid no attention, however, and headed to one of the apartments on the first floor upon stepping out of his ride. Closing his eyes while inhaling a deep breath, he lifted one hand and knocked at the door.
"Ichigo, are you home?" he called, "It's me."
It took awhile until he finally heard the door being unlocked from inside. Slowly, the figure of the blue hair peeked out from the small space of the opened door, looking up at him timidly.
"T-Tsurumaru-san…?"
"Yo," the vocalist showed him a subtle smile. They had only parted ways this morning, but it felt as though he hadn't seen Ichigo for a long time. At the same time, a wave of guilt struck him right in the heart when he recalled the photos in the article Ookurikara had shown him awhile ago.
He didn't need to ask why this young man didn't even dare to step outside; from his working place until back here, Ichigo had literally been chased down by the media like a hunted animal.
"Are they… Are they still here? The journalist, I mean," still in a small voice, the blue hair asked.
"I didn't see any of them when I arrived, but I bet they're hiding around here somewhere," the vocalist shrugged his shoulders before looking back at the person in front of him, "Anyway, could you please come out for a bit? I have something I need to tell you."
"But the journalists…"
"They're gonna try to eavesdrop either way, so it won't make any difference," Tsurumaru forced a laugh, "Also, I have a feeling you might kick me out after listening to what I'm going to say, so it's better to just talk outside."
"I-I could never—"
"Ichigo…" the vocalist called him in a gentle, yet seemingly desperate voice, "Please?"
Not expecting to hear his pleading out of the blue, Ichigo was taken aback. His hands were still clutching at the doorknob as he contemplated, but after a brief pause, the young man finally came out. Nevertheless, knowing very well that what they were doing and saying was most likely being watched left him fidgeting restlessly as he stood before the white hair.
"Umm… So… What would you like to talk about, Tsurumaru-san?"
"Yeah… There are two things, basically," the vocalist sighed; an apologetic smile was drawn on his face, "First of all, I'm sorry to drag you into all this. If it wasn't for my irresponsible act, you would never have been exposed to the media. Not like this, at the very least."
"W-Why would you apologize over something like that? You didn't do any wrong."
"I have been warned to be careful with what I do in public, and yet I blindly followed my feelings. As the result, I made you went through such horrible experience."
"But I—"
"You picked up the call from Hasebe this morning, right?" Tsurumaru asked, "Did he tell you not to meet me again? Is that why you didn't speak a single word even when I was asking you?"
"N-No, that's not it," Ichigo shook his head, "He only asked me what we were doing last night."
"And? What did you tell him?"
"I said you were tired after the concert and you had to drive me back home, so I invited you to spend the night in my house. Otherwise, it would be dangerous if you kept driving under that condition," the blue hair responded; his brows knitted together as he tried to explain, "But afterwards he told me that a lot of articles have been spreading around, claiming that we are going out. That's why I thought…"
He hung his head down.
"I thought… Your career is threatened because of me…"
After all the troubles he'd gone through, still Ichigo didn't blame him although both of them knew very well who started all this mess. Had he not held himself back at that moment, Tsurumaru might've rushed at the blue hair and squeezed him in his arms.
"…You're too nice," in the end, the vocalist only sighed once more, "Even though you have all the rights to say it was I who hugged you all of a sudden."
"Certainly, I was surprised. But you mean no harm, so you are not at fault."
"Yeah… About that, there's still one more thing I want to tell you—" Tsurumaru stopped himself midway. Turning back to face the narrow yard and streets, he opened his mouth and spoke without holding back. "I know you guys are there. Come out now, there's no more need to hide."
At his remark, it didn't take long for several journalists to finally show up from their hiding places; some of them had even gotten quite close to record everything the both of them had been talking about. Ichigo shrank back immediately upon seeing those people closing in, but before he could run back into his apartment, the vocalist caught him by the wrist.
"Wait."
"But these people, they're—"
"I know. I want them to hear this, as well, so it doesn't matter."
Bewilderment appeared on the blue hair's face and he didn't hide it. At the same time, Tsurumaru noticed that all the reporters were paying full attention to every single word he said; some even appeared to be making notes even though their colleagues already had a camera ready. Inhaling a deep breath one more time, he let go of Ichigo's hand and looked at him.
"I come here to fulfill a promise I made with someone a very long time ago," he said to him, "By doing this, I know I might bring down the band I've built together with my friends. By doing this, I know I might get the agency into trouble and more importantly, disappoint the fans who have been supporting us. I know I might be risking my own career as an artist, however…"
He stopped there on purpose. Despite knowing very well that everything he'd said and done would be aired for all to see not long after this, he held out his hand towards the blue hair in front of him, gazing into his eyes with a determined look.
"Won't you be my lover, Ichigo Hitofuri?"
There was a pause. Neither Ichigo nor any of the journalists raised their voice, but Tsurumaru could see all the reporters having the same dumbfounded look on their faces. They must've not expected to hear him saying such a thing, but the white hair paid no more attention to them. Instead, he remained staring at the young man before him who stood petrified as if he was nailed to the floor.
"…W-What…" upon discovering his voice back, the blue hair stuttered, "What are you saying, I…"
His breathings grew restless; his golden eyes not focusing. He seemed to be looking back at the white hair standing in front of him, but at the same time it looked as though he was looking at something else.
"W-What is this…? Why am I…?" surprised and confused, his body began to shake as he covered his face with both hands.
Nevertheless, Tsurumaru said nothing. He simply took a step forward, pulling the blue hair into his arms who strangely put no resistance when he was being held.
"That's how it is," the vocalist looked at the cameras directed at him, "This is enough, isn't it? I apologize to everyone for acting so selfishly, but may I please ask you to kindly stop questioning and chasing him from now on? I will answer everything you want me to later, so… Please, just leave him alone. He is a very important person for me."
After saying that, Tsurumaru brought the blue hair back into his own apartment and closed the door behind them, not caring how those reporters would react to what he'd just said. Once they were inside, he wrapped his arms around the man in his embrace and kissed the top of his head without saying anything.
"What's with these tears? Why… Why am I crying?" Ichigo's voice trembled as he kept his face buried on his palms. From the gaps between his fingers, several teardrops began to fall from his eyes. "Tsurumaru-san, what… What did you do to me?"
"Shall I tell you a story?" instead of answering the other's question, the white hair loosened his hug and circled his hands around Ichigo's waist, "A very long time ago, I was taken in my sleep by people who desired to have me in their possession. It made me afraid to fall asleep at night, because I was worried someone might kidnap me again."
Looking up at the ceiling, the vocalist continued despite the bewildered look staring at him.
"But then I met someone. He also had his fair share of trauma in the past, even worse than mine, so I thought I had to protect him from the recurring nightmare haunting him every night. However, do you know what this person told me then?"
Ichigo didn't try to hide his confusion, but still he remained quiet and listened to what the man in front of him was saying. Upon being faced by that question, slowly he shook his head.
"It's alright, Tsurumaru-dono. You are safe here. No one is going to take you away. I will not let them to," the white hair repeated the words said to him in the far past he'd recalled, "Funny, isn't it? I tried to protect him, but he protected me instead. And yet it made me felt even more insecure, because if someone were to take me away in my sleep, it meant I would be separated from him."
"…Then…what happened to that person?"
"Can't you guess?"
"Huh?"
"We had to separate, me and that person," Tsurumaru chuckled, "But on our final day we made a promise. I told him…that if we were to meet again in another life, I would propose to him with exactly the same words."
He wiped the traces of tears away from the blue hair's face, gently kissing the back of his hand before gazing into those gold-colored eyes.
"Won't you be my lover…Ichigo Hitofuri?"
Ichigo's eyes went wide. Even though Tsurumaru had brushed away his tears, those clear droplets began to roll down his face again. It appeared that the young man was attempting to talk, but when he opened his lips, he only ended up choking on his own breath.
"I… I don't understand…" he stuttered, "I don't understand what you're saying…"
"Ichigo."
"Tell me," he grabbed the vocalist by the collar and looked up at him, "Tsurumaru-san, just…what is happening to me?"
Tsurumaru didn't answer his question, but caressed both sides of his face instead. In the next moment, his face drew closer until their lips met.
"…?!"
"I'm glad," the white hair smiled happily while rubbing Ichigo's lips with his thumb, "If you cry this much for me, does that mean your feelings for me haven't changed?"
"What are you—?"
"I love you, ichigo," not letting the blue hair to finish his words, Tsurumaru held him tight, "Back then and now, my feelings for you remained the same. All the songs I've written… Every single one of them… I made them while thinking of you, even when we hadn't met in this life."
Again, he pulled the blue hair into another kiss. He could feel the body in his arms jolted when he carefully slipped his tongue in and entwined theirs together, but Tsurumaru didn't stop. He still remembered each and every single place, where and how he should touch, and even though Ichigo was still struggling at first, his resistance stopped the moment Tsurumaru stroke the back of his hair and teasingly slid his hand down to his nape.
"Nnggh, mmph!"
"Are you feeling good?" the white hair asked between their kisses, a meaningful smile was drawn on his face, "Here, you like it when I touch you like this, right?"
Still covering Ichigo's mouth with his, Tsurumaru slipped his hand into the back collar of the blue hair's shirt, stroking the area around his nape and upper back. He could feel the young man shivered and clutching even tighter at him, and it didn't take long until he lost strength in his legs and nearly slumped down to the floor had the vocalist not been holding him.
"So it's still the same after all," said white hair while chuckling happily at Ichigo's reaction, "Does that mean, at the very least, your body still remembers me?"
In a swift, yet gentle movement Tsurumaru switched their position so it would be the blue hair's turn to be leaning against the closed door. The later appeared to have finally gotten a hold of himself, but still perplexity remained visible on his face; his eyes were reddened and appeared slightly swollen. To this sight, Tsurumaru kissed the traces of tears from his cheek.
"Sorry," he returned the blue hair's gaze with an apologizing look, "I didn't mean to scare you. It's just… It's been such a long time, so I…"
He didn't continue his words. However, to his surprise the young man before him touched his arms despite his fingers quivering from nervousness.
"I… I don't understand…" Ichigo said meekly, "I've only known you recently and we're both men, but…"
"But?"
"But…" with his face turning red all the way to his ears, the blue hair softly bumped his head against Tsurumaru's chest, mumbling in a voice so small the vocalist almost missed it, "But for some reason, I don't feel any repulsion when you're holding me."
"Ichigo…"
"I-It's weird, isn't it?" he immediately added while gripping tight at the other's clothes, "Even though I don't know who you are to me or who I am to you, I—"
"Is that a yes?" not waiting for his companion to end his sentence, Tsurumaru peered at his bashful face, "Does that mean I have permission to touch you now?"
"W-Wha—"
"It's okay if you don't remember now," he kissed the blue hair's fingers, "As long as you don't hate me, it's enough."
From those slender fingers, Tsurumaru showered him with kisses all the way up his arms. Ichigo flinched when the white hair reached the side of his neck, and as he shut his eyes tight, he didn't realize that the buttons of his shirt were being opened one after the other. By the time he noticed, the vocalist already placed the palm of his hand on his bare chest.
"T-Tsurumaru-san!"
"Don't worry. I know what I'm doing."
While nipping at his collarbone, the vocalist's fingers lightly pinched the soft, pink-colored buds protruding on the surface of the other's chest. They became hard as he played with them, and at the same time he placed one of his legs between Ichigo's thighs; his knee nudging at the sensitive part that the blue hair couldn't help but moved his hips involuntarily to the stimulation.
"Ah!"
"How is it? I'm not wrong, aren't I?"
"S-Such a thing, I'm—"
"And next would be…here," catching the flustered Ichigo by the arms, Tsurumaru turned him around and embraced him from the back. He kissed his exposed nape, nibbling at them while caressing his body all over to divert the blue hair's attention from his attempt to strip him off his clothes little by little. When the vocalist started licking and biting at his shoulder, however, Ichigo flinched as though he'd come to a realization and he gripped at Tsurumaru's hands.
"W-Wait," he said almost in a panic, "Not that…please…"
"Not what?"
"…T-The back…" in a timid voice, Ichigo looked down, "Could you please…not look at my back?"
"Ah…" the white hair appeared to recall something. But instead of stopping, he nibbled at the other's ear that the blue hair shuddered, "Don't worry. I know what it is."
As he said that, he kept taking off Ichigo's clothes despite the young man's fruitless struggle. It didn't take long until his back was entirely exposed, and on the surface of his skin were several spots where the color was different from the rest of his body. If one were to only have a glance, they almost looked like scars from healed burn-wounds.
"This is what you mean, right?" said Tsurumaru while stroking the different color, "Is it a birthmark?"
"…It's hideous," the blue haired mumbled, not even wanting to see the other man in the eyes. As he said this, he curled his body as if to protect himself.
"It's not hideous. I think this is proof that you're the same Ichigo Hitofuri that I remember," with a chuckle, the vocalist kissed those irregular spots on the blue hair's back, "But enough playing. Don't you think we should start to get serious?"
Tsurumaru wrapped one arm around the other's waist, pulling him close that Ichigo's back was pressed against his torso. With his free hand, he began to unbutton the blue hair's pants and slipped his hand in, slowly rubbing the half-hard member without holding. Just when Ichigo was just about to cry out, he covered his mouth and whispered in his ear.
"Mind your voice," he said in a low, husky voice, "Those journalists might still be out there."
"Mmmngh! Nnngh!"
"Hehe, I know, I know. You're feeling it right?"
He could feel the other's heat rising in his hand as the blue hair arched his back; his hips shaking as if his legs could give away at any moment. Deliberately, Tsurumaru pressed his own against Ichigo's backside, hinting to the young man of what he was about to do. From his reaction, Tsurumaru knew the blue hair understood and that was when he slipped in his fingers into that place.
"Tsurumaru-san—?!"
"This place needs to be prepared, doesn't it?" to the other's surprise, the vocalist teasingly wriggled his fingers inside, inviting gasps of breaths to escape those soft lips, "I wonder if your special spot here is still the same, too… Shall we start?"
At this moment, it was nearly impossible for Ichigo to form any words without making it scatter into incoherent moans. He looked back at the white hair; his eyes already moist and teary again albeit for an entirely different reason. Looking at the vocalist's golden eyes, similar to his, it looked as though he was trying to convey something. To this indescribable gaze, a subtle smile was drawn on Tsurumaru's face as he sighed, gently lifting the other's chin and pulled him into a passionate kiss once more.
"You're opening yourself up to me like this. Can I…at least get my hopes up?"
While the blue hair was distracted by his kiss and touches, Tsurumaru placed himself behind him, lifting up his hips. Being careful as not to shock the young man, he slowly took his fingers out, replacing them with his own heat. Truth be told, he was almost at the brink of his sanity, but still he pushed in as gently as he could, hugging the shivering body in his arms.
"Uwah— Aa, aah, kuh…!"
"Ichigo…" he called out the blue hair's name in a suppressed voice, gritting his teeth, "Are you okay? Are you in pain?"
"Nnnn… Nngh…"
He heard no answer from him. Ichigo was pressing his head against the door, clenching his fists so tight that his knuckles turned white. From the way he kept holding back his sniffles, however, the answer should've been obvious.
"Ah… I did it again…"
The vocalist could feel his heart sinking. He had seen Ichigo making this kind of face before. The first time he took him completely, the blue hair insisted to remain silent even though he was most likely hurting. They had done this so many times afterwards that Tsurumaru forgot the beginning was not as easy. He failed to consider that even though they might be the same person, the Ichigo Hitofuri in this life might never have done something like this before.
"Say… Is this your first time?" he held the person to whom he was connected with, "I'm sorry for rushing it. Should we stop?"
The blue hair shook his head.
"Are you sure?"
His question was responded with a nod. Exhaling a deep breath for the last time today, Tsurumaru prompted the blue hair to look back, pressing their lips together as he began to drive into him.
"…?!"
"It'll be alright," he whispered between their kisses, "I'm not going to hurt you."
"Nnn! Nnnggh!"
"Hmm? What is it?"
It felt as though Ichigo was trying to tell him something. He was desperately tugging at the arms holding him, trying his best to call the white hair's attention despite his current condition. When Tsurumaru slightly pulled back and stared at him with a questioning look, their golden eyes met.
"T-Tsurumaru…"
"Yes?"
"…I…I love…you…" clutching tight at the vocalist's hand, Ichigo entwined their fingers, "I…love you… I still do… Tsurumaru-dono…"
Along with his breathless whisper, even if it was just for a brief second, a faint smile was drawn on the blue hair's face before he resigned himself completely to the desire binding them together.
