A/N: I wrote this entire fic before S4 dropped, so Eve here is different from canon Eve.
"You seem happy today, Detective."
"Oh" – she sat up at her desk as Lucifer drew up a chair – "I had the best night. Yeah, I took Trixie and her friend with my new roommate Eve to the roller derby, and she loved it. How was your evening?""I watched the sunset."
"OK. That sounds… peaceful. Alone?"
"With Dad."
"Oh."
"Yes. It was a miracle."
"Scuse me?"
"The sunset was a miracle. From Dad."
"Yeah… I guess… I mean, I've definitely seen sunsets like that."
"No, Detective. This was an actual miracle. It was in the east," he added. "Sorry, I should have led with that, shouldn't I?"
"In the east? Are you sure it was east? Because your apartment is…" She pointed to the ceiling and traced a circle with her finger.
"I'm not a moron," he chuckled. "Yes, I nipped across to check the real sunset. I've never put much faith in my dad," he explained.
"Are you sure it wasn't a mirror? You do have a lot of them."
"It was outside the window, moving beyond the skyscrapers. Beyond," he said, raising a finger to stem her response, "not reflected in them. Unless you're suggesting there was a bloody great mirror on the hillside. In the sky." He thought. "Unless it was one of my siblings playing a joke on me."
"Do they do that a lot?"
"No. Not ever, actually. Not since I got kicked out of home."
"But when it's really bright, there is a kinda glow when there's cloud in the east, like a reflection, I guess."
"It wasn't a glow, Detective. It was the sun. You know, that big ball of fire in the sky? And before you say it, no it was not an air balloon, or a billboard, or a spaceship from the planet Zog." He sighed. "No wonder miracles don't happen as often as they used to."
"So it was…"
"A miracle, yes. A bone-fide miracle."
"Wow. That's…" She nodded. "And I saw the news this morning, and there was nothing about –"
"Well, it wouldn't be on the news, would it? No, only I saw it. Obviously."
"Uhuh."
"Miracles are very personal, Detective. They're between you and –" He looked her up and down and felt a pang of worry. "Maybe I shouldn't have told you. After all, it was meant to be just Dad and me." He glanced upwards. "Oh, well, no harm done," he said more cheerfully than he felt.
The Detective was tapping her pen thoughtfully on a file.
"You don't believe me, do you?"
"I believe that you… believe…"
"You know I really am the Devil – and yet you still don't believe this. You really are curious."
"Seeing is believing."
"Yes, and I know what I saw."
"OK. Fine. It was a bone-fide miracle. And – I'm really happy for you." She slipped into thought again. "Did he… speak to you?"
"Baby steps, Detective. Baby steps."
"OK. Well." She shook her head and laughed. "I guess if God and the Devil can get along – then there's hope for all of us."
"Right – one" – he held up a finger – "'get along' is a smidge strong. More like… It was a pleasant evening watching the sunset. And two… What do you mean?"
"'There's hope for all of us'? I don't know… It's just a phrase."
"You're really big on this hope thing, aren't you?"
"Isn't everyone?"
"Not me. I've been without any hope for eons and eons. And I've turned out all right. Way more than all right, actually. I'm positively a role model for the downtrodden and hopeless."
She gave him a look. It was steeped with scepticism, but she looked as Heaven-sent as ever.
"Detective. It isn't the only miracle I've encountered in the last few years." He watched her school her face into a question. "There's you."
Her face softened. "That's… sweet."
"It's true. You're a miracle."
She nodded sympathetically, and reached a tentative hand towards his arm. She didn't believe him on this one either, did she? But the more important question was, should he help her to?
-x-
Though Linda would probably wet herself trying to deconstruct it, he decided not to share the sunset miracle with her too, in case Dad got upset. But he did want to talk about the other miracle.
"She's a miracle to me," he ended. "And that's enough."
Linda was quiet, and he turned to look. If he wasn't mistaken – and he had to admit, he rarely was – it looked suspiciously like she was right in the middle of committing the sin of pride.
Because he'd thought of that, hadn't he? All by himself. And what's more, this time, he didn't have to ask to know it was right.
-x-
He watched the Detective prepare the coffee. She snorted. "The Devil is in my kitchen. I'm making coffee for the Devil."
"Are you going to say that in every sentence?"
"It's OK for you. You don't know how weird it is."
"I'm sitting in a human's kitchen. I'm having coffee made for me by a human."
"OK. Point taken." She fiddled in a drawer. "You know… No, you're gonna think I'm crazy."
"I'm the Devil, Detective. I think no one is crazy."
"Well." She brought over two mugs and sat opposite him at the breakfast bar. "When I was little, Mom and Dad would take me camping. It was so beautiful at night. Dad would point out all the constellations, tell me stories about each one. And when they were asleep, I'd sneak out and just lie there gazing up at the stars, I don't know how long, hours. I just never tired of it. I stared at them so hard, I used to think I could walk among them. I'd go back to school and tell everyone how I walked between the Bear and the Sickle." She laughed.
He let a moment pass in silence. "You're a starwalker?"
"I'm a … Really? That's a thi–? You dick," she said when he could no longer stop his straight face from crumbling. She flushed an adorable shade. "You absolute dick. Bad news for you you can bleed around me, cos I am so gonna kill your ass." She lowered her voice. "You're lucky Trixie's here, or I so would."
"Hah, urchins serve a purpose after all!" He drank to that. Shame it was just coffee.
"So you really can bleed… get hurt… only when I'm near? How near?"
"You may find this hard to believe, but I've never actually measured."
"There's a lot of things I'm finding hard to believe suddenly." She glared at him over the mug she was hugging. "And you're not helping."
"Apologies," he said, but was careful not to promise never to do it again.
"So that started when I shot you?" She squinted in thought. "That long?"
"That long what?"
She studied him, but said nothing.
"Mommy, I did another drawing!" The child hurtled into the room. Lucifer tensed. Did every small human have defective brakes? But she was headed for the Detective, clutching a sheaf of paper.
"Let's see, Monkey. Who is it?"
"Adam and Eve."
Lucifer peered. If you discounted Adam's disproportionately long arms, and their clothes – the fact that they had any – it was… "Uncannily accurate."
The Detective gaped at him, then back down at her offspring's handiwork.
"Most humans depict her as a blonde, which she most definitely was not."
"Eve helped me," said the child before turning and hurtling back to where she'd come from.
"Oh!" The Detective laughed in relief. "Oh, she just means my new roommate."
"Who looks like this?" asked Lucifer, pointing. "Does she have a perfectly smooth stomach? No navel," he explained at her bemused look.
"I don't know, Lucifer. Should I ask her – 'Hey, are you out of the Bible, like –'"? She stared up at him.
"Like Cain?" Lucifer finished for her.
She shook her head. "It can't be… it's just a…"
"Coincidence? In my experience, there's no such thing." He looked her up and down. "Not where you're concerned." But before he could think further, the child was back, coming to a frightening stop at his side.
"I did a drawing of Lucifer too."
He plucked the sketch from the small hand and feigned interest. The simplistic face contained an upturned semicircle so large it wasn't even preternaturally possible. But the crude figure was standing next to an equally crude one, with blonde hair in a ponytail and holding a gun in one hand and in the other a scribbly square that if you squinted at and had several clues you might just about guess was a police badge.
"Why am I there too, honey?"
"Because Lucifer is always helping you."
The Detective held Lucifer's gaze. He didn't realise the child was still there until the Detective spoke. "Munchkin, I think we'll have to make some room on the wall for these. What do you think, we'll do that later? Do you want me to fix you a milkshake?"
The child nodded and disappeared again. The Detective got up and busied herself at the counter.
Lucifer looked down at the substandard picture. The amateur way the smile went outside the limits of his cock-eyed counterpart's face. The way its balloon-fingered hand stuck out at forty-five degrees next to the other figure's identical hand, almost touching, but not quite. "Where are the horns and tail?"
He'd said it half-joking, but the Detective, holding a glass of frothy brown liquid, paused to consider him. "Trixie draws what she sees," she said, and left to tend to her needy offspring.
Lucifer observed the picture. He checked the doorway where the Detective had gone, then folded the paper in half, then into four – and checking the door again, he carefully slid the child's drawing inside his suit jacket.
-x-
"Patrick, pour the lady in white a martini – apple."
"You remember!" She turned a joyous smile on him.
"Of course. You never forget your first. Eve. How's it hanging?" From what he could see of her, everything seemed to be hanging very well.
"This place." She looked around in wonder like she'd never seen the inside of a nightclub before. "You've made your own Eden. In LA."
"Well, I try." Patrick brought her drink. "Where's Adam?"
She sipped. "He wouldn't be seen dead a hundred yards near a place like this."
"Ah yes, I forgot. The man who invented the word 'vanilla'. So you've ditched him?"
"Like I could! We've been married for God knows how long."
Lucifer rolled his eyes upwards. "He is probably counting, you know. What is this, then? The forty-century itch?"
"I heard you were here."
"Ah…" He faltered. "This isn't about me killing your son, is it? Because I had good reason. He'd killed someone I knew and was threatening someone else."
She gave him an even look. "You mean the son who murdered my other son?"
Lucifer regarded her for a second, then grinned. "Fair point. To old friends, then?" He raised his Scotch, and they drank, her smile matching his.
"Love what you've done with your hair, by the way," he said. "More revealing now it isn't down to your groin. Well, it would be, if it weren't for those pesky clothes. Back then, I practically begged Dad for a gentle wind. Gave a whole new meaning to the phrase 'a stiff breeze'. Ah – happy days."
"We can be happy again."
Lucifer smiled.
"Speaking of clothes," she went on, "I like yours, but… they just don't feel right, between you and me."
Lucifer grinned.
"Maybe," she said, "we can go somewhere… more private?"
"Eve. Your wish – as always – is my command." And he showed her to the elevator.
The doors hadn't even closed when she started to undo his belt.
"What are you doing, Eve?" he said, both exhilarated and concerned by her haste. "This is exactly what got us both into trouble the last time. Well, more specifically your invention of fruit-based splooshing."
"I don't recall you wearing a belt – or anything else – the last time." She slid her hands up as the elevator rose. "You know, clothes are actually really sexy. When they're taken off" – she undid a shirt button – "one" – and another – "by one."
"You didn't learn this from Adam, did you?"
"What are you implying?" She stopped undoing his buttons, removed her hands. "I haven't been with anyone else. Apart from you."
"You expect me to believe that? In all this time?"
"Hey, there's such a thing as porn." She put her hands back onto his chest. "I tried to get him to watch it with me." She looked at him sulkily. "He usually falls asleep. Once he stops laughing. Anyway," she said, "everyone on Earth is my descendant. It would be weird."
"Fair point."
"I've never been tempted."
"You've changed."
"I forgot what a devilish sense of humour you have. I'm glad all that time in Hell hasn't dampened your spirits."
"Oh, believe me, most of the people there are a riot. Yes, Genghis Khan may have struck fear into the hearts of his enemies while alive, but these days he slays with puns instead of arrows."
Thankfully, they'd reached his penthouse, and Lucifer made straight for the bar. His lips almost touched whisky when she pulled the glass out of his hand.
"Haven't you had enough?" she said. "Plenty of time for that later."
She spotted the bedroom. With a grin, she pulled him with her, practically tore his shirt off as they kissed, then pushed him onto the bed.
"Down girl!"
She grinned. "Don't mind if I do." And she slid down.
"Now," he said breathlessly, "I usually… prefer giv– Well, all right, just this once."
He gave as good as he got. Better.
"Wow," she said, not bothering with the bedclothes, as naked as the day he'd met her. "That was good. I mean better than I remember."
"I should think so," he said, caressing her, readying to go again. "I've had plenty of practice with your offspring." He stopped still. "I think I've just killed the mood."
She helpfully moved his hand down her stomach.
"Does anyone notice that?" he asked as he felt the absence of her naval.
"They think I've had cosmetic surgery. It's amazing what people will turn a blind eye to, even when it goes against everything they're told."
"Tell me about it. Seven years and only two humans on the planet believe me when I say I'm the Devil."
"Who's the other one?"
"Ah – that's right, you're the Detective's new roommate, aren't you?"
"She likes talking about you. Well, someone who shares your name. A nightclub owner, like you. But who is he? She doesn't talk about the real you. Why?"
"Because she doesn't know you're from the Bible?"
"Or because she doesn't know you?"
"Oh, she does. She's seen all my ugly bits now."
"Really? Anyway, it's three. Three humans believe you're the Devil. Four if you count Adam."
"Must we? Actually, I wasn't counting immortals."
"We're not immortal."
"What?" Lucifer stared. "What moisturiser do you use?"
"We can die, we just don't age. We were never meant to in Eden, remember? And we've been careful. Adam's very careful. Very."
"What exciting lives you must lead. How do you know you can die?"
"It's not like we haven't nearly, lots of times. This is where I got impaled skiing." She pointed to a scar on her left side.
"You can ski?"
"That was the last time. And this" – she held out her right arm, a red mark running down the length of the inside – "is where a carriage ran into me. That one got Adam really worried."
"Carriage? Don't you mean car?"
"No, a carriage. It was the horse that could have killed me. If it had been just a few inches to the side."
"Right," said Lucifer, wondering just how sheltered a life she'd been leading. It sounded like Adam had been keeping her in a prison.
"Adam said he was in a tunnel with a light, once. Thought it might be Heaven."
"Not unless they've been doing some serious landscaping while I've been away."
"Hell?"
"Tunnels, yes. Lights at the end of them? Not so much. Well," he said, getting up and putting on his dressing gown, "that was delightful! We really must do it again some time."
Her face fell. "Sick of me already?"
"Of course not, darling. I just…" He chuckled, tickled by her eagerness, but also a little disconcerted. He remembered how clingy she could get. Or was he misremembering, since they'd hardly had their pick of partners back then?
"You're tired of me talking about Adam, aren't you?"
"Actually, I'm wondering where he is… exactly?"
"He's the biggest homebody."
"Oh dear. Sad for someone who used to call Paradise home."
"He didn't want to come to LA. Or even America."
Now that she mentioned it, he noticed she still had much of the old Sumerian accent. Strange, after all this time. "Twat," he said, of Adam.
"He's my husband."
"Did Dad give you a choice? World's first arranged marriage, darling."
"He's loyal. Which is more than I can say for you."
"I'm not big on loyalty. Ask Dad. Anyway, you started… swelling up."
"I was pregnant."
"You know how I feel about small humans. It was frightening."
"Pregnancy isn't frightening."
"I was talking about the small human."
"I love him."
Lucifer was shocked to feel a pang of jealousy.
"I love you too," she said with a smile and, kneeling on the bed, she placed her hand on his face. "I guess I was made to love him, wasn't I? But I chose to love you."
Lucifer felt his mood returning. He threw off his dressing gown, wearing only a grin.
-x-
They slept all morning, and after lunch in his apartment caught up on some of the millennia they'd missed – she wanted to know all about Hell and the fun he'd had on Earth – followed by dinner on the balcony and another trip to pound town.
The next day, as it was a Saturday, he decided to treat her to some of the fun that party-pooper-pants Adam had denied her.
"Can't believe I'm saying this, but… enough about me. Today is all about Eve!"
"But can't we stay here?" she asked as he practically dragged her into the elevator. "We've been having fun, haven't we?"
"Get out there and live, darling!"
"I might die."
"Oh, you will," he said cheerfully. "One day. But what's important before you do is living."
Once he'd got her in his convertible and he'd settled in next to her, she started to relax.
"Hold on to your sunhat, darling." He sped through the streets, showing her the sights.
"You know how to live!" She hugged his arm while clinging on to her wide-brimmed hat. "Is this the longest you've been on Earth?"
"Oh yes. I'm retired."
She actually gasped. "You don't know how happy that makes me!"
He patted her hand as she gazed into his eyes.
"Where are we now?" she asked as they pulled into the airport.
"Well," he said, smiling as he spotted the private jet he'd hired, "if I'm to give you the best nights on the town, we shall have to get you some new glad rags. And where better than the best shopping experience the world has to offer?"
From the minute they landed in New York, he made sure they did all the best clichés. He dragged her from one to the next, then watched her face light up in joy as she tried on dress after dress in a succession of high-class shops, her bags increasing in number as the day went on. Her neck and wrists brightening with the finest jewellery. He was delighted that she didn't seem to tire.
When the evening came, and after dinner at the best restaurant in the city – he called in a favour in lieu of a reservation – he surprised her with tickets to the opera.
"Faust?" It seemed the smile she had been wearing all day was now permanently fixed. "You had to pick the one about you."
"Well, I was hardly going to plump for Joseph, was I?"
They almost had sex in the box. He managed to convince her to wait until the Penthouse Suite at The Mark – another favour repaid at short notice.
They made full use of its facilities, leaving divinity in every one of its five King- and Queen-size bedrooms.
The next day, he called in yet another favour. "Tickets to the New York Yankees!"
"Is that baseball? I didn't know you liked sport."
"Oh, I don't. Only water sports. But you haven't lived till you've seen this. Thousands of humans crammed together, all baying for blood. I mean, it's not throwing Christians to the lions, but beggars can't be choosers."
She was every bit as exhilarated as he'd hoped. And then – was this a sign from Dad? – the kisscam fell onto them. Actually, it was hardly surprising, he thought, admiring himself on the big screen. She was wearing the next biggest grin to his, and they were the best-dressed couple in the entire stadium. She didn't know what was going on, so he took her in his arms. What the hell.
He kissed her like the first time. When his Father had been powerless to stop it.
His whole body groaned under the eyes of all these humans. Every one of them outcasts because of his and Eve's tryst.
He couldn't bear it any more.
"Aren't we staying for the rest of the game?" asked Eve as he dragged her through the crowds towards the exit. The camera had moved on long ago.
Fortunately, he'd had the foresight to put the roof up on the car he'd hired, in case it rained that afternoon. It might have done, but they wouldn't have noticed, as they were busy making their own sport inside.
Dusk had fallen when he came back laden with tacos and shakes. She was lying on the car hood, looking up at the sky. "I thought of bringing ribs," he said with a grin, "but realised it'd be in bad taste."
She patted the hood next to her for him to join her. "Remember when you pointed them all out to me?"
"What?" He dumped the bag of nourishment on the passenger seat.
"The stars of course."
He stopped with one palm on the hood, cold against his skin except where his ring was. "That was a long time ago."
"Aren't you still proud of the light you brought? You've spent too long in Hell, in the dark."
"Yes, well, I'm retired now. As I said."
"So…" She reached for his hand.
He pulled it away and moved around to the driver's side. "We'll be late for our plane back." He got into the car.
"Already?" She sighed, but followed him, smiling as she tucked into a taco, sucking on a straw at the same time.
-x-
On the plane back to LA, she couldn't stop trying on all the clothes he'd bought her.
"Aren't you getting tired?" He certainly was. Whenever he got away from Hell every few decades, he always tried to pack in as much fun on Earth as he could before Amenadiel came a-calling. But it was as if Eve had spent millennia in Hell without a break.
She fell into a seat and gazed happily out of the window at the night-lit cities below.
"What second name are you going by, anyway?" He poured himself another drink.
"Adam decided on Gardner."
He snorted. "Never was the imaginative sort, was he? Gosh, he really is Mr Obvious. Should have gone with that."
"Are you all alone here?"
"On Earth? I had my best demon, Maze. She's gone back home. And there was Mum. She's gone too. And Amenadiel – don't know about him – he comes and goes when he feels like it. He's Dad's favourite, you know."
"You're his most beloved. Remember?"
He hadn't. Or he had, but remembered also how he'd thrown it all away. "Didn't I tell you all this the other day? Don't you know all about Maze from the Detective?"
"It's you she likes talking about the most."
"Right. I mean, who wouldn't? Look, just don't go asking her too many questions. Or she'll get suspicious. I've already planted a seed, unfortunately," he said, thinking of the child's drawing of Adam and Eve, which would now be pinned to the Detective's wall.
Eve gave him a playful look. "Remember the time we planted that apple core?"
He grinned. "Indeed. I don't think Dad was expecting you to put it there."
She considered him. "He envies you."
"Who? Dad?" He laughed.
"Because you just do whatever you want to do. How else do you explain why he lets bad things happen to good people?"
He stared at her over his Scotch with a dubious smile. "Somebody's become philosophical in their old age."
She shrugged. "Just bored. And he's afraid of you."
He chuckled. "Yes."
"That you'll reject his love again."
He stopped chuckling. "Eve, I think you've had too much excitement these last few days. Why not try to get some sleep, hmm?"
"You know why you and he never got along? Because, of all his children, you reminded him most of himself."
She'd crossed the line. "I am not like my Father!" He turned his head to rid himself of the sudden tension. The plane's engines hummed. "Enough talk of him," he said a second later. "Let's not spoil the whole evening."
He smiled as she tried on another hat and did a twirl for him in the aisle.
-x-
Five hours in the air, and still she didn't want to stop.
She dragged him down to the club, in the last throes of a boisterous night. "I remember when you only had eyes for me," she said as they passed a bevy of beautiful young women.
"Be reasonable, dear, you were literally the only woman on Earth." He ordered a whisky. "And I wasn't into men then. I mean, don't get me wrong, if you'd said no…" He smiled at a fitty who was approaching him with a familiar look. But the chap walked right by him. Lucifer twisted his head, only to see him slavering over Eve's dress. "The lady's not interested."
Eve gazed at him around the man's stubborn shoulder. He thought he saw her smile. "Who says?" And now she did smile as she raised her hand and drew her fingers through the man's hair.
"But he's your…" Lucifer gave up and turned back to the bar. Let her do it if she desired. He ordered another drink and tried to distract himself by figuring out how many greats separated them. But he couldn't be bothered with the maths.
He glanced back across the floor, once. And saw it was no longer just the two of them. Two more men had joined them, and they seemed to be vying for her attention, pawing her flesh and drooling over her dress. She was smiling at them, encouraging them. It was unseemly, and he felt a twinge of jealousy. He almost let her be – she appeared to be enjoying it – then he caught her laughing eyes slide in his direction.
"Now, look, I'm all for an orgy," he said, after striding over to their little party.
"Who are you?" said one of them.
"My boyfriend," said Eve. "He's super bad."
"Really?" said the same man, sizing Lucifer up. Clearly, he was a moron.
"Darling, they want me to go with them. Should I? They were quite… insistent." Eve tugged her dress up over her cleavage with both hands, and blushed at Lucifer.
"Were they now?"
He got hold of the moron by the neck and pinned him to the wall several inches off the floor. He clawed uselessly at Lucifer's hand. "When Eve tells you I'm bad, you really ought to take her at her word. Because believe me, you don't want to see just how bad I can be." Lucifer flashed his anger through his Devil eyes.
Satisfied with the fear in the moron's face, he dropped him to the floor. He watched him scurry away with his friends.
"Come along, darling." He took Eve by the arm. "At this time of night it tends to be mostly the dregs still hanging around looking for fun."
She slipped herself out of his hold. "Why did you just let them go?"
He stared. "What did you want me to do?"
"Don't you think they deserve to be punished?"
He laughed. "Punished for what? A bit of harmless fun?"
"Couldn't you smell it on them?"
"Smell what? Cheap aftershave?"
"They – you don't know what they said to me."
"Well? What did they say?"
She looked at the floor. "I'm embarrassed to tell you."
Lucifer laughed in disbelief, but she seemed serious. "Eve, darling. You've had an interesting experience with a bunch of morons. That's all. No harm done, hmm?" He lifted her chin gently.
She gave him a smile.
He returned it. "That's better."
"But you would have punished them if they'd tried anything, wouldn't you?"
He looked at the sincerity in her face. "You know me."
"I do!" Her smile lit her eyes. "I knew you would."
-x-
"Look at you, smartening yourself up."
"I'm due at the station, darling. I'm a consultant. They'd be lost without me." He buttoned up his shirt.
She was still naked. It seemed she preferred it that way.
"Wait here, if you like. There's plenty drinks, and Patrick can get you anything else you desire."
"But how long will you be?"
"That depends on how much I'm needed. Could be all day."
"You like spending time with her, don't you?"
He fixed his cufflinks and turned to her. "Dad put her in my path. We've been through this. I'm only playing along with it."
"Why?"
"Look, she's not to blame for Dad's need to be a control freak." He checked his hair in the floor-length mirror.
"Chloe wants you to be a perfect angel. She loves you for something you're not. I love you for who you are." She came up behind him and folded her arms around his chest. Then moved her hands down.
He watched her in the mirror. "Well… maybe they can cope one hour without me."
-x-
"What took you? You missed all the fun."
Lucifer turned to the Detective. "What fun?"
"We brought the would-be drug lords in. You know, the ones started the fire nearly killed Dan. We're trying to find out just how much we can lay on them. Bastards brought along their fancy lawyers."
"That's not why I'm here, is it? Didn't you say in your message you were interviewing someone?"
"Claire Foles's father-in-law. Finally turned up. I wanted it to be a surprise."
"Wonderful," he said in a level voice. "Is it my rebirthday?"
She gave him a bruised look. "Sorry I bothered." She frowned. "Everything OK? Good weekend?"
"Marvellous!"
"Listen, uh, I haven't seen you for a few days. Do you… want to come to mine tonight for something to eat? Trixie's at her friend's, and my roommie's visiting her mom."
"Her mother? Is she indeed?"
"So...?"
"Can't tonight. Sorry. I've got a d– appointment. With an old friend. A very, very, very old friend. Raincheck?"
"Sure. Anyway," she said, fiddling with her ponytail over her shoulder, "I have plenty of things to do while Trixie's not around. Dan helped bring them in."
"Hmm?"
"The gangsters?"
"Oh." He chuckled. "Did he do a Dan and race in there on his own again?"
"You're in a strange mood." She was frowning again.
"How?"
"Dunno. Mean."
"Not even close, I'm afraid. So, where is he? Foles Senior?"
"He's in there stewing–" She looked at the interview room.
"You mean he's in there now? What are we dillydallying out here for?"
"What, the Devil has people to see? Thought you'd be super excited with all these bad guys here today."
"Surprising how little you know me."
"Yeah," she said. "I'm beginning to wonder."
He flung open the interview room door. The sixty-year-old man at the table choked on the paper cup at his mouth.
"OK, Mr Foles," said the Detective as she took her seat, "we'll get straight to the point. As my partner here is in a hurry. Your neighbours said they saw you leave and return home alone the morning your daughter in law was killed. But you told us your son was with you the whole day, at your house, helping you clear out your garage. Why did you lie to us?"
"Because he wouldn't have an alibi otherwise–" Foles inhaled. "Dammit."
"Oh, well, that was easy," said Lucifer. "Can I go now?"
She glared at him. "Mr Foles, why do you think your son needs an alibi? Do you believe he murdered Claire?"
"No!"
"He had a motive, didn't he? When she got herself fired, his life was turned upside down."
"You don't have any evidence, do you? No prints, no DNA?"
She looked down at her notes in lieu of a reply.
"That's because he didn't do it."
"If you're so sure, then why lie?"
"He's my son. I love him no matter what."
"No matter what? Then you do think he had the motive? Mr Foles?" she pressed when he didn't respond.
"Sure, he said some stuff."
"Mr Foles, just because we can't get the DNA to match your son's, doesn't mean he wasn't involved. He could have had an accomplice. Anything you can tell us will help us find Claire's killer."
He stared at the table, taking large breaths as he thought. "Do you have kids?" When she didn't answer, he turned to Lucifer. "Do you?"
"Gosh, no, I despise children! But the Detective has one."
She gave him a hard look.
"Then you get it," said Mr Foles.
"My daughter is eight."
"You haven't hit the teens yet. That's the toughest time. An exercise in patience. Forgiveness." He looked at Lucifer. "It's tough, letting them go. But you have to give them their own space. Let them make their own mistakes. You have to be hard on them. So they can grow." He continued gazing at Lucifer as the silence lengthened.
"Does that forgiveness extend to murder?" Lucifer asked at last.
Foles blinked. "The alibi was my idea. He's all I've got. His mom ran off when he was young. She came back two or three times asking for money. He helps me out now, since my arthritis got worse."
"I'm sorry to hear that," said the Detective. "But your son is an adult now. And you're still protecting him."
"You'd do the same. Wait till your kid grows up. Just because they get older doesn't mean you stop loving them. You never stop loving them, no matter–" Seeing the Detective's sympathy was dwindling, he appealed to Lucifer again. "No matter what he's done, I'll never stop loving my son."
Lucifer glared back in disbelief. "Not even though he might be a murderer? Not evil enough for you?"
"He's my son."
"Then you're a fool." Red misted his vision for a flash.
"Lucifer!" She was staring at him. "Outside."
He left a lingering glare on the man before he followed her out.
"What the he– What just happened in there?"
"The man is an idiot. Defending the indefensible."
"I don't know where you're at today."
"Where I'm at?"
"What zone you're in."
"What zone?"
"Look, just stay out here and calm down, OK? Or go home. Or wherever it is you have to be."
She went back into the room. He didn't feel like going home, not immediately anyway. He felt fine.
He straightened his cuffs as he watched a group of men in suits, some blue, some pinstriped black, enter the floor, accompanied by police officers.
He couldn't help admiring the way they were clearly trying to butter up the cops, perhaps attempting to bribe them. He wondered about the officer, the traffic cop, he himself had bribed just before he'd met the Detective. He hadn't run into him again. Maybe he'd bought himself something too pretty to come back to work for. Maybe he'd got a taste for it – pretty things and bribery – he thought with a cold smile.
The door opened behind him. "Feel better now?" asked the Detective.
He snorted. "I've never felt better, Detective." He hadn't. He'd had an extremely pleasurable weekend. It was just the kind of thing he'd left Hell for. Funny that he'd lost sight of that, for some reason. Shouldn't she be happy for him?
"Well," she said, oblivious to his resurgent happiness, "a couple of days ago, Claire's husband admitted he was home alone all day till he went to the restaurant to start his shift that afternoon. Working on his screenplay. Hence why his father gave him an alibi. And it's doubtful he would have got someone else to kill her – if he had, he would have made sure he had a better alibi than that. And the money."
"Can he prove he was at home?"
"We're checking into it." She shook her head. "I wish he'd told us this earlier, him and his father."
"Could be another lie."
She sighed. "I see the pyromaniac drug lords are back."
She sized up the two suited criminals currying the favour of her colleagues. Wearing shades and slick smiles, they looked even more dapper than their expensive lawyers.
But their suits were clearly off the rack, Lucifer thought, smoothing down his own tailored one.
The Detective snorted. "Doesn't matter how charming and respectable they try to make themselves appear on the outside – on the inside, they're still monsters."
Suddenly cold, Lucifer stared after her as she walked away.
-x-
"Now, look," he told Eve in the club as the evening started to peak, "don't keep calling me your snake. That creature, you know, it just sort of started hanging around all the time. And then I didn't have the heart to send it packing." He went misty-eyed. "I wonder what happened to the poor little mite?"
"It bit me!" She pointed.
"On your boobies?" He grinned.
"Don't act like you don't know. You probably told it to."
"I don't speak snake, my dear. I'm the Devil, not Voldemort."
"Who? My serpent, then. It's apt. You can do wicked things with your tongue."
"I'd lay off the juice, darling, if I were you."
"I haven't been drunk for centuries. Adam doesn't like it."
"Adam this, Adam that. Do you do everything he says? You were like that with God, once, and look where that got you."
"Paradise?"
"Er – yes, well. Call it what you like. Hell, Paradise, what's the diffy?" He chuckled.
"This music's too loud. Let's take this upstairs."
He smirked. "I wish! Oh, you mean my apartment? As you desire."
But just as they were turning, he spotted a familiar face by the bar.
"Linda! What brings you to the best club in town?"
"I'm on a date."
"Oh. Oh! Not Daniel, is it?" He grinned, looked around the crowd.
"No. Blind date – well, I wish it had been. He's drop-dead gorgeous. But, it turns out, totally shallow. All 'me, me, me'. I get enough of that at work." She laughed at Eve, but she didn't get it.
"Well," said Lucifer, "good for you, shaking him off. Drop-dead gorgeous, you say? And suddenly free…" His eyes moved back to the crowd.
"Linda," Eve said as she considered her. "I don't think Lucifer's mentioned you."
"Oh," said Lucifer, ordering more drinks, "Linda's the other one. And my therapist."
"Other one what?" Linda asked.
"The other human."
"Other human what?" Linda asked.
Eve said as Lucifer gathered the drinks from the bar, "He doesn't talk about you as much as he does her."
"Her?"
"Chloe."
"OK. Have you and Lucifer known each other long?"
"Oh, we go way back. I popped his cherry."
Lucifer spluttered laughter and put a hand on her back. "TMI, Eve!" He felt himself go warm under the hot club lights.
"Oh. Oh!" exclaimed Linda, the penny dropping on the 'what' in the 'other human what'. "Eve. Eve, Eve? Of Adam and Eve?"
Eve's smile vanished. "We're not a double act."
Linda squinted. "Kind of are."
"Ladies, ladies!" Lucifer sensed the tension. "Let's not squabble." He looked between the two women he'd had the pleasure of. "Unless you want to."
"Darling," said Eve, "I'm getting too hot in these clothes."
"Ah –" He turned to Linda. "Not used to clothes." He chuckled. "Would you mind terribly if we love you and leave you?"
"Oh, um, sure. I'll get back to my date, if he hasn't found a better offer. Or if I can't find one. It was… nice to meet you, Eve. I'll see you tomorrow, Lucifer?"
"Oh, ah – yes, of course. Look forward to it!"
"I don't think she likes me," Eve said as they left the floor. "I don't like her either."
"Linda? She's a lovely human. One of the best I know."
"She doesn't smell right."
"Do you mean figuratively or literally?" He'd never noticed Linda smelling of anything. Except sometimes spackle.
They were barely out of the elevator and Eve was naked again.
He joined her on the bed.
"Now you see me – where are you?" She cupped his face in both hands.
He chuckled. "I'm right here, Eve."
But instead of undressing him, she caressed his face, working and pressing it with her fingers as if it were a creature in itself, a pet of hers, or a toy. She brought her own face closer to his. He thought she wanted to kiss him, but her mouth went to his ear, her warm cheek touching his, while one hand continued to stroke heat into his other cheek. "Where are you, my serpent?" she whispered.
"Stop!" He sat up, sending her falling to the side of the bed. He didn't need to ask her what she was doing. He knew all too well. He remembered now, with a sick feeling, as if he'd had to drag those ancient memories out.
"Why?" she asked, and he looked at her in disbelief.
"It's hurt people I know."
"But your face only hurts people who deserve to be hurt – that's what you used it for, in Hell, wasn't it? It never hurt me."
"That was before Hell, before any soul was there. You know what it meant to me before."
"That you thought you were a monster," she said as though it were merely a fact. "God made you feel like that, when he cast you out. I never thought you were. It didn't matter to me." She reached out to his face. Lucifer flinched away. She tried again, more gently, and this time he let her. "I want to see you, my love."
Lucifer was unable to pull his gaze away from her eyes as she petted his face. He felt her draw it out of him. He couldn't stop it. Even if he'd wanted to.
Her smile lit up his desire. "There you are."
