Hide might, possibly, be smitten.
It's ridiculous because he knows almost nothing about Kaneki beyond his name (and his love of books and that he has a horrible poker face and that he's almost definitely a ghoul), and there's the minor detail that the guy seems to want nothing to do with him. Or at least, he's been desperately trying to convince Hide of that ever since their first meeting, and Hide can't help but be intrigued.
Kaneki is striking and adorable and totally Hide's type; he would remember meeting him for sure. But Hide's existence seems to be both a source of pain and of relief to Kaneki, an internal conflict written on his face every time he so much as looks at Hide, and Hide wants to find out why. He can't help it. He's curious by nature, and Kaneki is a particularly attractive puzzle.
The fact that Kaneki really looks like he needs a friend is another motivating factor. Hide would do just about anything at this point if it meant wiping away the melancholy that clings to Kaneki like a second skin. Kaneki looks so much better when he's smiling. Hide has the image of Kaneki's fond, little smile burned into his mind and has already made it a goal of his to get Kaneki to look at him like that again, expression friendly and warm and startlingly lovely.
So far, he's managed to win three sincere smiles, as well as a wobbly grin as Kaneki tried not to laugh, and man, was his entertained expression cute. It was totally worth the hit to his pride. Hide's never cared about such a silly thing anyway.
He's practically bouncing on his feet as his eyes rove over the shelves, hastily trying to find the book he came here for before Kaneki decides he has somewhere he has to be. It was really lucky he happened to run him into here, and Hide doesn't want to test his good fortune by taking too long. Finally, he spots a familiar title, and letting out a triumphant "Aha!" he grabs it and gestures for Kaneki to wait for him as he pays for it.
Once done, the two of them leave and begin walking down the sidewalk side by side. Hide peers at Kaneki in his peripheral, noticing that his expression has once again become morose, shoulders slumped ever so slightly as if weighed down by something.
But by what?
"Thinking heavy thoughts?" Hide asks, unable to stifle the urge to poke and prod at this walking enigma, even if it's kind of rude.
'Kind of rude' is basically his defining personality trait, alongside 'nosy' and 'cute as a button.'
Kaneki blinks him, surprised. Then realization dawns as he goes over what he's just been asked, and rather than grow offended at Hide's prying, like most people do, inexplicably, Kaneki smiles. It's a tiny thing, a little sad, a little regretful, but undoubtedly wholeheartedly affectionate.
Hide finds himself flushing a little at receiving that smile again, pleased and flattered and confused at what brought it on.
"...Sorry," Kaneki offers, upon seeing his reaction, but unlike before, the smile doesn't disappear behind a mask of politeness. "You just- You remind me of someone," he explains, a little stiltedly. "My best friend, actually. You two-" Here, he stops talking entirely involuntarily, voice catching in his throat. He clears it and tries again. "You two are a lot alike," he says, and- Oh.
That smile isn't for him. Of course it isn't. He knew that, had never seriously considered that this perfect stranger could somehow harbor such strong fondness for Hide when they've only just met. Ahhh, he can't help feeling disappointed, though.
"He must have been important to you," Hide surmises. It doesn't take a genius to realize that something must have happened to the guy, but even Hide has enough tact not to ask about it.
"We grew up together," Kaneki reveals, eyes clouding over with fond memories, from the looks of it. "He was closer to me than my own family."
That says a whole host of things, right there, and it explains some things. He hadn't wanted to assume and had never intended to ask about it. He's aware he can get carried away with his own need to investigate and snoop into people's lives, and he's gotten better about it after being scolded one too many times.
But Kaneki didn't - and still doesn't - get along with his own family, and the (presumably) only person he considered close is no longer, likely because he isn't around anymore.
Suddenly Hide understands the careful distance, the anticipation of pain, the look in Kaneki's eyes when he smiles at Hide both like it hurts him and like he never wants to look away.
More than anything, Kaneki seems to be grieving. Grieving entirely alone, and Hide- well, Hide can't just leave him be. It's not the polite thing to do, or even the right thing. Kaneki will probably get over this on his own, in his own time, and maybe in a few months, he'll be ready to become friends with Hide without being reminded of this other guy.
Maybe all that's true, and he doesn't need Hide to do anything but leave him alone.
But- he can't. For some reason, he feels like that's the worst decision he could ever make. He can't shake the feeling that if he lets Kaneki go now, he'll go somewhere far away where Hide can't find him again, forever out of his reach. Even now, Hide keeps close physically, keeps glancing at Kaneki out the corner of his to make sure he's still there.
And back when he first spotted that head of blindingly bright white hair, back in the laundry room that first day, he'd felt like something had shuttered into place, like the restlessness he'd felt his whole life had finally settled down, like he'd finally found something he hadn't even known he'd been missing.
And he still feels that way.
He doesn't believe in love at first sight or soulmates, but there's no denying that he and Kaneki have some sort of connection. Maybe Kaneki feels it too, underneath the swell of grief. Either way, there's no way he's letting Kaneki get away so easily.
(Not this time.)
