A/N: My thanks to everyone for reading and reviewing. Hope you enjoy the next chapter. We're currently at the night before Bounce. SA


Chapter 4 – Self preservation v collateral damage


Gibbs had finished up in the office and made his way home and down to the comfort of his basement, swapping his work clothes for jeans and a sweatshirt along the way. Reclining against the workbench, jar of Bourbon in one hand and the weight of what to do about his senior field agent in the other, Gibbs was—for a brief moment—unsure how to handle Tony's current attempt to 'fix things'.

He'd spent a while reading through Tony's lists back at the office. It wasn't the physicality of reading a few typed lines on a page that had taken much time, it was reading between the lines that took the effort.

It was the same with DiNozzo's reports. Clear, concise, simple but professional in execution; never wordy. DiNozzo didn't dally when describing his actions and the outcomes in his own reports and Gibbs had learned early on that not only did he have to watch out for what DiNozzo didn't say, but he had to watch out for what DiNozzo didn't write. There were numerous occasions Gibbs could remember where Tony had elected not to include small but nevertheless highly significant details. Details that threw a completely different light on the way a situation could be construed by those higher up the food chain. Sometimes Gibbs allowed the omissions to stand but not every time. Gibbs always knew, of course. He wrote the book on omitting small but highly significant details.

In fact, they were alike in that both of them had a way of being economical with the truth when it came to their private lives. Tony might have spouted a lot of crap about Monique, Jessica, Amber or whoever the hell was flavour of the week back when Kate was around, but recently there'd been none of that; or at least only half-hearted attempts at it. Gibbs knew he'd played on it specifically to annoy Kate back in the day, but it had tailed off when Gibbs had returned from Mexico. Since Jeanne Benoit, Gibbs hadn't heard Tony talk openly, to the rest of the team, about anyone close to him. In fact, McGee seemed to have taken DiNozzo's top spot on the 'player image projection' leader board; a fact that had not gone unnoticed by DiNozzo. Was Tony maybe a little jealous of his Probie?

Gibbs chuckled quietly to himself. DiNozzo kept his true private life very closely guarded. Allowing others to see only what he wanted them to see, or what he thought the others needed to see - same as Gibbs. Whilst that economy and control was great for undercover work, it wasn't quite so great for lasting friendship or health. He knew from personal experience.

DiNozzo had employed that economy to full force when his car had been blown up during his undercover operation for Jen. During the customary debrief session they'd glossed over the incident in the hospital mortuary where he'd been slapped around and both Jeanne and DiNozzo had been held at gunpoint. DiNozzo had been high on adrenaline when he'd made it into the office but as the day wore on, he'd become more subdued and the tell tale signs of physical pain made Gibbs suspicious.

When Tony had finally submitted his report there was a brief mention of the incident; enough to satisfy the Director, but not Gibbs. Gibbs had taken him to one side and asked him if there was anything else that wasn't in the report that he should know about. Tony had said 'No' and assured Gibbs that everything was 'in order' and that he was 'more than fine'. Gibbs had raised his hand at that but stopped as Tony had genuinely flinched. The stubborn agent finally revealed that he'd been hit on the head with a gun butt, and although he'd lost consciousness for only a few seconds, Jeanne had already seen to him and that he really only had a mild headache, didn't have any blurred vision, he wasn't nauseous and hadn't vomited at all.

Gibbs had sent DiNozzo home with strict instructions not to come in the following day. Tony hadn't argued with him which Gibbs took as testament to the toll the past couple of weeks had taken on him. In fact he'd only sent DiNozzo home alone on the proviso that he called Ducky or himself immediately if he experienced any of the usual suspects. He added the customary threat that if he did experience any symptoms and didn't call Ducky or himself then he needn't bother calling him ever again. Tony had smiled at Gibbs and muttered a 'Thanks, Boss' in return to the reassuringly familiar banter. It had always been so easy. They had always read each other well and understood each other's needs but now he really was unsure what to do and that worried him.

Damn Vance for sending his team away.

Gibbs took a sip of Bourbon and felt the burn as the liquid eased down the back of his throat.

His team.

That wasn't going to happen again. Know your enemy. Understand them. Get in their heads. Think like them; use that against them and take them down. Vance had timed his jab to perfection. Gibbs hadn't seen it coming and the blow had stung. Vowing never to let Vance find an inch of an opening, Gibbs had gone on covert attack through the muse of overt defence. Getting into Vance's head had proven difficult but he had his team back and he was making progress. Unfortunately, in order to protect his team he'd had to get even closer to Vance and that had meant he'd had to push his team further away.

It had been a concerted effort to protect himself and his team. As a Marine, Gibbs had experienced situations where his closest buddies had been killed; cruelly snatched from him without a moment's notice. Even knowing the inherent risks of combat, it didn't make those times any easier to live with. Still Gibbs hadn't been able to protect them all.

Flushing out a mole, disbanding his team was the Director's prerogative. But the sly convenience of an agent afloat position miles away from D.C. was just the excuse Vance had needed to wrench Tony off his team. There was no real reason for Tony to be posted afloat. He hadn't chosen McGee for that posting. McGee's talents had been needed elsewhere. Tony's talents could have been utilised on another team... but no, Vance had to post him alone on a ship, with limited personal contact with the outside world. Just what DiNozzo didn't need. Tony needed stimulation. He'd throw himself into something but after a length of time the drudgery and routine stuff bored him, especially when his talents were ignored and he couldn't use them to their optimum potential. When he got bored he became restless, and that was dangerous. Tony was a 'high maintenance' agent.

Abby had been a godsend. Her fervent badgering of him to get the team home had been a smarting reminder to keep his head focused and the end goal in sight - Tony, Tim, Ziva back in their rightful places. Her frequent mail runs had also kept Tony going and Gibbs was grateful, having had to take a back seat. A few personal conversations by satellite phone and the occasional official video conference for work related information had been all he'd allowed himself; purposefully keeping his contact to a minimum. The team leader hadn't wanted to let Vance see how much it bothered him to see Tony being confined that way. He still managed to throw Tony a few words of encouragement when he could. And he'd seen the subtle changes in Tony over the four months he'd been at sea.

That's why he'd backed off when Tony came back. Although the return of McGee and Ziva had been part of Vance's deal when they'd flushed out the mole, DiNozzo's return had been less certain. Vance had held out a little while longer and Gibbs had had to fight – hard. In the end, he'd taken a riskbounced Vance into making a decisionand it had worked. To shake DiNozzo's hand and see him sitting officially behind his desk once again; all of his team sitting behind each of their respective desks again – that had brought a lump to his throat.

But then reality set in. Gibbs hadn't liked that hold that Leon had over him and he knew he'd have to play Vance. So he'd backed off all of his field team. Not let himself get as close to any of them as he had done in the past. That had been hard to do; hard for Tony to take too, and it had obviously come to a head in recent weeks.

He'd just been trying to protect them. Protect himself.

But he had to keep them at arm's length. He couldn't afford or allow himself to get as close to his team as he had done in the past. Losing them had been painful and he couldn't lose them again. Vance's threat was always going to be there; he'd said as much. Although Vance had derived a great deal of pleasure from sending Tony off to sea, Gibbs had seen the gloat behind Vance's eyes and knew he'd enjoyed taking the team leader down in the process. Yes, Vance had punished Tony but he'd savoured punishing Gibbs more.

Gibbs couldn't risk losing his team again.

Maybe Tony thought he was bored with him. Maybe he thought he didn't care anymore. That wasn't the case. He just cared too much.

Tony had to be careful. Any excuse and Leon could and would transfer him. Gibbs didn't mind DiNozzo joking around; the odd humour was an essential coping mechanism in the team dynamic. The quip, his own roll of the eyes, the verbal 'can it' and then back to work. It was necessary, relevant, and he'd missed it. The main threat to their daily shot of 'DiNozzo' was Vance. Lately though, Tony always seemed to be in the wrong place at the wrong time – within earshot of Vance. It was becoming dangerous.

That was where Gibbs found himself now. Trying his utmost to protect Tony from Vance and trying desperately to protect himself from losing his team. Again. He didn't want Tony to leave but in his haste to keep his distance, maybe he'd pushed too far.

By ignoring the humour, sounding as though he wasn't interested, not acknowledging the usual Tony-esque behaviour, teasing and by throwing some of it back in his senior field agent's face (he knew Abby wouldn't be able to keep the attitude adjustment comment to herself and he knew Tony had spies that would let him in on the narcissistic comment) he hoped Tony would take the hint. Understand. He had faith that DiNozzo would work it out. Tony always did.

He trusted him. He trusted all of them.

TBC...


A/N: Next chapter... the day of Bounce.