"I'm suddenly not so hungry," Kol said, his eyes narrowing.
"Oh?" Bonnie's eyebrow raised. "And why not? Something make you lose your appetite? If it's what we just talked about, grow up, would you? That was the whole point of bringing it up again. Facing your issues and getting past them. Unless of course your entire sense of self-worth hinges on your penis, in which case, I feel really, really bad for you."
Kol stood up. He was grinning, but his fists were clenched behind his back. "Well, well, aren't you witty?" He asked. "I'm so glad I could provide you with some amusement, but I'm done. You just enjoy your shrimp and I'll be-"
"At home alone?" Bonnie asked. "Don't be ridiculous, Kol. You don't have to leave. I'm not trying to start a fight here. I just-"
"You're not?" Kol replied. "Well, you could have fooled me. Rubbing your great new life and your stupid, ugly boyfriend in my face every chance you get. I get it, you're happy. Congratulations. Can we just move on, please!"
Bonnie's eyes widened. "Well, all right. I swear you won't hear anything more about Roger from me."
"Thank you," Kol nodded, than sat down again, burying his face in his menu.
They sat in silence for a moment and then Kol looked up at Bonnie. "Is it because I'm a vampire?" He whispered across the table.
"What?" Bonnie leaned forward. "What do you mean? And do you really want to go blurting that out in front of everyone?"
Kol looked around. Only two tables around them had people sitting at them, one or two to a table. No one acted as if they had heard anything suspicious.
"No one heard anything," Kol said. "Now tell me, is the reason why you're so keen on dating Roger because he's a normal human like you and I'm a vampire. Not just a vampire, actually, an Original, one of the first vampires ever created."
"Well, good for you," Bonnie said, her voice deadpan. "What do you want me to do with that information? Throw you a parade?"
"No," Kol said through his teeth. "Just answer the question."
"My liking Roger has nothing to do with what you are, and incidentally, I'm not human," Bonnie told him.
Kol's eyes widened. "Excuse me, what? You're not human? You never told me this!" Just then, Bonnie put a finger to her lips as the waiter came by. "So what can I get the two of you?" He asked.
"The shrimp please," Bonnie said, handing him her menu. "And an iced tea, thank you."
The waiter then looked expectantly at Kol. "And you, sir?"
"Oh, I don't want anything," Kol replied, shaking his head.
"Well, all right," the waiter nodded. "I'll be back if you change your mind." He left and Kol turned back to Bonnie. "When were you planning on telling me this about yourself?"
"Never, frankly," Bonnie replied. "I've noticed that once I tell people about my powers, that's how they tend to define me and I don't like it. I like to be known for other things."
"Oh," Kol nodded. "Like being an incredibly rich supermodel?"
"And working on my Masters in social work," Bonnie reminded him. "Modeling just pays the bills. I really want to spend my life helping people. Some people find that endearing about me. Now let's think of your reaction when I told you what I wanted to do. You laughed."
"Well, I'm sorry," Kol said. "But honestly, I thought you were joking."
Bonnie rolled her eyes. "You really don't get it," she said. "I think I'd like to have you meet Roger sometime, I mean really meet him, so you can see how decent men treat their girlfriends."
"Are you gonna get up and stomp away in anger now, darling?" Kol asked her. "Remember, you've got shrimp coming."
Bonnie shook her head. "I'm not leaving. I even feel the two of us are capable of having a civilized conversation. Do you feel we are?"
Kol nodded. "Well, yes, of course." He paused. "So tell me about your witchcraft."
"That depends," Bonnie said. "Are you asking because you're interested and have nothing else is mind, or are you asking me because eventually you're gonna show up at my door and ask me to do spells for you?"
"No," Kol shook his head. "I'm genuinely interested."
"I don't know if I believe that," Bonnie said.
"Well, how are we supposed to get back together and have a mutually beneficial relationship if you can't believe that I'm genuinely interested in what you have to say?" Kol asked, trying not to sound frustrated.
"So the only reason you'll listen to anything I say is that you think it will make me want to get back together with you?" Bonnie asked. "I tell you what? How about we don't talk until I finish eating and then we go our separate ways until later? How many times do I have to tell you that I'm with Roger?"
"You can tell me as many times as you like," Kol told her. "But honestly, I don't think you're happy with him."
"How the hell would you know that?" Bonnie asked. "I'm plenty happy."
"There's not even a small part of you that wishes I hadn't done what I did so we'd still be together right now?" He prodded.
"Well, maybe a small part," Bonnie conceded. "A very small part."
The waiter brought Bonnie her shrimp and the two of them lapsed into silence after that. When the bill came, Bonnie began pulling money out of her wallet.
"Oh, no," Kol shook his head. "That's not necessary. You don't have to do that."
"Why?" Bonnie asked. "This wasn't a date or anything. I don't expect you to pay for me. And it's not like I ordered a lot." She paused. "Will you feel emasculated again if I pay for my own food?"
Kol grinned. "Please let me. So few things give me any sort of pleasure anymore."
"Fine," Bonnie said, putting her wallet back. "But you have to actually pay. None of that compulsion stuff."
"Fine," Kol sighed and reluctantly took out his wallet. Bonnie watched him pull money out of it with an eagle eye, making sure he took out the right amount and left a tip. "Thank you," she said after it was all over. "That was very generous, Kol. And incidentally, when would you be available to spend the day with Roger and me?" She pulled a brown-leather-bound appointment book out of her purse and poised her pen on a date.
"Wait," Kol said quickly. "You were actually serious about that?"
"Well, yes," Bonnie nodded. "Have you ever known me to say things I didn't mean?"
"Well, no," Kol replied. "I just hoped this was the first time."
"So, when can we see you?" Bonnie began tapping her pen against the page until Kol finally said, "Next week, all right? I'll see you and Roger next week. On Tuesday. Would seven in the evening be all right?"
"Yes," Bonnie nodded, scribbling it in. "Seven would be lovely. See you then, Kol."
"Oh, my god, Kol. You did what?" Rebekah asked her brother, trying really hard not to laugh.
Kol sighed. "I agreed to go over to Bonnie's house and spend time with her and Roger. She said it would be good for me."
"You're not actually gonna go, are you?" Rebekah asked. "Can you imagine how awkward it will be?"
"There might be some awkwardness, yes," Kol nodded. "But it's still time I get to spend with Bonnie, so that's a plus, isn't it? As for Roger, I'm sure that it won't be so bad to spend an hour or two with the man. I could teach him a thing or two."
"Well, if you're sure," Rebekah told him. "I'll be waiting by the door for when you come home early screaming.
"What are we talking about here?" Klaus asked.
"Nothing," Rebekah said.
"Oh, you can tell him," Kol told her. "I'm not ashamed of it."
"He agreed to spend time with Bonnie and Roger next week," Rebekah said. "Apparently, Bonnie thinks it will improve his character."
Klaus burst out laughing. "I don't know what to say about that," he said when he could finally talk."
"You don't have to say anything," Kol said. "I'll be meeting them Tuesday night at seven. I'm sure the two of you will be able to find a way to entertain yourselves while I'm gone?"
"Right on time," Bonnie said when the bell rang precisely at seven p.m. on the following Tuesday. "I don't know why that surprises me so much. Promptness was always something you were good at."
"Well, thank you," Kol said. He handed her a plastic box of chocolate chip cookies. "These are for you. I didn't want to show up empty-handed."
Bonnie grinned. "Well, aren't you sweet?" They walked into the living room and Kol looked around. "So, where's Roger?"
"He's not here yet," Bonnie said apologetically. "He called me a few minutes ago and said he was stuck on a business call. I'll get here eventually."
"So it's just you and me here?" He asked, trying not to look as eager as he felt. "Are you okay with that? Or do you want me to leave and return when Roger comes?"
Suddenly, Bonnie's eyes narrowed. "He's not at your house, is he? You didn't think up some fake job as a way for us to be alone together?"
"No," Kol said. "I don't even know Roger's number. Are you all right?"
"Yeah," Bonnie nodded. "I'm sorry." She sighed. "Well, let's sit down, shall we? We can watch Wheel of Fortune until Roger gets here."
They sat awkwardly beside each other in front of the television and watched the show in silence. When the doorbell rang, Bonnie jumped up to answer it, leaving Kol alone on the sofa. When she returned a few minutes later, she and Roger were arm in arm. They stood staring at Kol for a few seconds and then Roger shyly cleared his throat. "Bonnie told me that things have been kind of dead around here without me."
"Oh, yes," Kol nodded. "We've been waiting for you. You're the life of the party."
Roger flushed a little and then he and Bonnie sat down.
"Can I get either of you a drink?" Kol asked, gracefully rising.
"I'll just have a water," Bonnie said.
"I would like some milk," Roger said. Kol went to get the drinks and came to sit down a few minutes later. "So," he said to Bonnie. "Just what sort of things did you have in mind for tonight? Are we just gonna sit down and talk, or...?"
Bonnie looked at Roger. "What did you want to do tonight?" She asked.
"Let's go look in your board game closet," Roger said. He and Bonnie went upstairs and came back with Scrabble, Trivial Pursuit and Monopoly.
They started with Scrabble, and then halfway through their first game of Trivial Pursuit, Bonnie got up to go to the bathroom, and once she was gone, Roger leaned forward and asked Kol something very surprising.
"Look," he said. "I know Bonnie had this little get-together so I could be a good influence on you, but honestly, I would much rather have your help."
"Wait, what?" Kol asked.
"You said that night at your party that you and she used to see the world and go to shows and stuff. I want to become the sort of person that does that," Roger said. "Teach me, please!"
"Are you sure?" Kol asked, looking him over. "It's going to take a lot of work on your part. Are you prepared for that?"
"Yes!" Roger said. "When do we start?"
