Joss passed several homeless men and women who watched her wordlessly and none of them asked for a single dime. She saw a woman standing near a cart tracking her, but she ignored the redhead as she sat down beside her guy and he didn't even react to the subtle groan the bench made as she sat down. She eyed his profile for several moments, just grateful he was still alive. Something must have stopped him from what this man had most likely set out to do the night he saved her. Because no other explanation she could come up with explained why he took a subway all the way to Canal when this was the encampment he chose to stay at.

The silence between them was deafening and she couldn't take it any longer. "Did you really think I wouldn't find you?" she questioned as a way of a greeting. Her bum didn't lift his gaze or even acknowledge her presence. "I wouldn't be a very good detective if I couldn't find you."

She didn't get any reaction. He remained silent and his eyes remained downcast. Joss looked around and leaned forward on her forearms so she could see his face a little bit. However it was his eyes she truly wanted to see again. "You never gave me your name." she said gently.

That did get a response because he lifted his head, turning towards her, gripping her with his same unforgettable and intensely sad blue eyes. "Seems like the only time you need a name now is if you're in trouble, so am I in trouble?" he asked. She didn't comment on the fact that his breath smelled like alcohol and it was only one in the afternoon.

"You tell me, you're the one living on the street." she responded. He was quiet and her eyes searched his, trying to find anything in them besides the overwhelming pain that laid bare in them. When he didn't do anything she switched topics, hoping to get a response. "I wanted to thank you for saving my life," she said sincerely and he didn't even blink an eye. "And I want to return the favor."

"You think I need saving," he murmured.

She didn't respond to the bait, that yes he sure the hell did. "From the way you fought with those four dumb-asses I'd say you spent time in the service, but you don't learn to fight the way you did in the regular army. So I'd say you were Special Forces or Delta. I was in the service myself, seen a lot of guys that got lost and just needed some help."

His eyes bored into her, but before she continued, he spoke first. "And then there are those who did evil things, they are the real monsters that lurk in the shadows and don't deserve any help, tell me detective which do you suppose I am?" he wondered and the way he said 'help' told her he figured her out.

Joss eyed her hobo. Guilt was ridden across his face, while his haunting blue eyes weren't masking the pain he was in. They hadn't the night he helped her and they sure the hell weren't now. Joss felt like she was suffocating just staring into his eyes, he looked like a man that was broken and had no use for life anymore. She wondered if this man realized his eyes gave his secrets away. He felt like he was evil, some sort of monster, but she looked in the eyes of true evil and they didn't look like this man. If this man was truly the monster he believed himself to be then he wouldn't have saved her life. He would have let that man strangle her to death because what concern was it to a homeless man that was a monster who was on the verge of suicide?

"The former," she answered and she could tell she surprised him with the answer.

Her bum looked away. "You don't even know who I am," he said quietly. "But you've thanked me, now it's time you should go, Detective," he suggested.

She smiled. "That not so subtle hint to get me to go isn't going to work. I still don't have your name."

He exhaled. "John."

She snorted. "Sure it is, and my name is Tootie Ramsey."

Joss smiled when she was surprised with a soft half laugh that escaped him, which seemed to surprise him too, before it was gone and his expression was blank once more. "It's John," he said quietly.

Joss believed him this time. "My name is Joss Carter."

He nodded before he looked at her. "Now that you know my name, you can go."

"I want to help you."

"I don't want your help," he said dismissively.

Joss opened her mouth to tell him that it was too damn bad because he was going to receive her help whether or not he wanted it, but she felt another presence by them. She glanced up and saw the woman with the cart, reddish tinted hair, and a bubbled blue coat standing directly in front of them. Her green eyes were mistrusting.

"John is she bothering you?" the woman asked, eyeing her but directing her question to the man beside her.

She glanced at John who looked up and gave a ghost of a smile to the woman with the cart. "No Joan, she's not bothering me." Joss resisted a snort because had she been she was sure John could most certainly handle himself against her and didn't need the cart Queen for backup.

The woman still eyed her with a mistrusting look. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure," he assured softly.

The woman nodded as she slowly walked away with her cart. Joss glanced at John. "She seems…protective."

"Joan is a good woman, but just don't ever touch what's in her cart."

Joss nodded. "Wouldn't dream of it," she reassured him and she thought she saw his lips try to twitch up into a smile but didn't make it. They fell into silence and she realized he was going to ignore her in hopes that she'd leave. Fat chance. But before she had the chance to him that much her cell phone buzzed with a text. She glanced at him as she distractedly tugged it out, seeing it was from the captain requesting her presence at the precinct. She frowned. "I have to go," she admitted reluctantly.

"Goodbye, Detective," he said. And the way he said it, it made it sound so final.

Joss shook her head as she stood up, noting he didn't look at her. "It's not goodbye John," she countered and that did earn her a look. He glanced up at her, this time his eyes were a shuddered mask, and she smiled. "It's merely a 'see you later,' because I'll be back tomorrow," she stated. She reached out touching his hand and he flinched under her gentle touch making her wonder when was the last time he felt such a touch. But she didn't dare ask. His skin felt soft and smooth, it was nice, and she dropped her hand away from his when she deemed it creepy to continue touching his hand. He didn't know her from Adam.

Joss forced herself to turn and walk away from him, which seemed to take all her willpower inside her to do. She didn't want to leave him here. She had a stupid impulsive wish to take him home with her and it was insane because as much as he didn't know her from Adam, she didn't know him either. But she knew for damn sure one thing; he needed saving and it was only fair she was the one to do it since he saved her first.

She looked over her shoulder at him, seeing he had gone back to looking down at the floor looking like a lost puppy or something. She sighed and she turned to look back where she was walking and nearly jumped out of her skin, stopping abruptly because the cart lady (John had called her Joan) was standing there blocking her path to the exit.

Joss grabbed her chest. "You nearly gave me a heart attack," she said and the woman smirked.

Her smirk dissolved into concern. "Why were you here talking with John?" the woman asked.

Joss crossed her arms across her chest. "Why is that any of your business?" she asked instead. First she got some answers and then maybe she'd reciprocate.

It seemed she and Joan were in a standoff for a few moments because the woman clearly looked unwilling to share but then shrugged. "I'm taking care of him."

That sounded vague at best. "And what does 'taking care of him' entail, Joan?"

"You speak like a cop," she commented dryly.

Joss harrumphed. "That's because I am a cop. He helped me, he saved my life and I kind of want to return the favor," she said in a way of answering the woman's question as she pointed to her bruises around her neck and the woman's green eyes looked at her neck before looking back into her eyes. "If you're worried if I'm here on official business, I'm not. I am here because I want to be here for him," she said sincerely.

The answer must have satisfied this Joan because her stiff posture relaxed. "I found him one afternoon wandering around the streets of New York alone, muttering to himself that he was too late and she was gone. People were staring at him because they thought he was mentally disturbed, but he just looked devastated to me. But most people allow looks to deceive them, I don't. John was staggering and had a bloodied shirt on. I had a little money, got him a new shirt, and got him to follow me. I brought him here with me when the winter got too cold to be out in the elements," the woman explained.

Her phone buzzed with another text which most likely was from the captain asking where she was, but she ignored it. She'd take the ass chewing for being late, for more answers about John. "How long have you been taking care of him?"

She shrugged. "A few months, I'd say. I make sure he eats and drinks something besides alcohol all the time. Somehow he'll get money and buy me and the others food and water, but nothing for himself except for his Jack."

Joss frowned. How was he getting money? But she shelved that for figuring out later, or asking him point blank when she came back. And she was coming back tomorrow and the next day and the day after that until the end of time until she helped this man.

She smiled. "Thank you Joan, I appreciate the info."

She nodded. "I only ask of you, cop lady, that if you are only going to cause him more pain, maybe its best you leave him be and let him live out his life the way he wants to."

Joss shook her head. "I'm sorry I can't do that, I think John has had too many people 'leave him be' as you said, and I can't. Sometimes all a person needs is someone to believe in them," she murmured with a soft smile as her eyes drifted back to the man in question who was still looking down, before looking back at Joan. "I'll be seeing you again, Joan." she assured her as she sidestepped the woman and exited the homeless encampment without another word as she was lost in thought.


AN: Okay, can I say I hate how we never have gotten a single flashback of John's time being homeless. When Joan was introduced in Risk(I think that's the episode title) I was hoping to see flashbacks of how she took care of him. John eyed her warmly at the end of the episode. I get that the fake beard is a bitch applying to Jim's face but seriously that is a whole part of his life that's missing. Sigh. Just another thing to add to my list of irritating things the show has forgotten about. So I added some Joan to this, plus a little backstory to her as well. Hope you guys don't mind.

In the next chapter, John reflects on Joss ;D

Thanks for reading XOXOXOXOX