Summary: We know they're made for each other but will they be able to make it work? Callie has security issues. Will she be able to work through them before she loses Arizona for good? Set before the baby drama.
Disclaimer: All things Grey's belong to Shonda. I'm just messing around in her playground. Katey is the only one that is an original creation of my imagination. Everything and everyone else is simply being borrowed.
Beta: Many Thanks to wicca678 over at livejournal for betaing.
A/N:I only have very basic medical knowledge and as a rule I try to avoid writing about things I don't understand. I apologise in advance if any medical references in this chapter don't make sense, I did some research before I wrote this chapter but google can only get you so far. I kept the medical stuff to a minium so hopefully it'll be fine.
Feedback is love! I always want to hear what you think. Your comments motivate me to keep writing and to improve.
A/N 2: Wicca678 won't be able to help me out for the next 1-2 chapters due to the Iceland volcano, so if anyone would be willing to be a temporary beta for me please message me or leave a comment. Thanks!
[Addison]
Since that night at Joe's five days ago Callie has been in her own little world, trying to figure out the best way to prove herself and her love to Arizona. We're sitting outside having lunch in the rare Seattle sunshine and she's off in her own world again. I get that it's really important to her and she wants to get it just right, but today has been really slow, add to that no conversation over crappy cafeteria lunch and you have very bored and somewhat irritated Addison.
"Are you planning to talk to me at all?" I question Callie as she stares off into space.
"Callie! Hey you in there?" I say as I snap my fingers in front of her face.
She jerks her head to look at me, a slight frown creasing her brow.
"What?" She questions impatiently.
"You're ignoring me and I'm having a really, really dull day. So I'm not in the mood to be ignored."
She gives me a 'you've got to be kidding me' look and goes back to her musing.
"I'll help you plan. Come on Cal I need an adult conversation! I've been around babies and Mark all day." I beg earning a laugh from her.
"Ok but no laughing at stupid cheesy ideas because if that's what it takes to get her back I'll do it." She warns.
I raise my hand
"No laughing." I agree with a smile, which she returns.
She opens her months to begin what I'm sure is an extremely long and fast ramble with just a hint of Spanish thrown in when a beeping rips though the air breaking any chance of a conversation. I look down at my pager and groan when I realise it's not mine breaking up our lunch early. She looks at me apologetically as she gets up from the table gathering the remains of her lunch.
"Fine but if I have to suffer through lunch by myself I'm coming over tonight to figure this out once and for all." I say, suddenly very annoyed with the salad in front of me.
"I'll see you at the end of your shift. Oh and go easy on the salad, it's not that bad." She replies laughing at me as she walks away to something I'm sure is much more interesting than salad.
Later that night...
After lunch the day didn't get any better. I had an afternoon full of charting, I kept reminding myself I should be glad because it meant no hurt mothers or babies needed to put them back together but it was just so hard to look past how boring charting is. I raise my fist to knock on the blue door in front of me and its flung open almost immediately.
"What are you doing here?" Cristina snaps.
"Nice to see you too." I say as I step past her into the apartment.
"I'm here to meet Father Christmas, what do you think I'm here for?" I reply raising an eyebrow at her.
"She's not home and you can't stay here, I already told Callie that I need the apartment tonight."
"Oh hey your here." Callie announces her presence as she strides through the open door.
"She was just leaving, just like you are." Cristina speaks up, sounding more irritated by the second.
"Wha... ooh right." Callie says, a smirk forming on her lips.
"Come on." She says looking at me as she turns and walks out the door. I follow quickly a little confused. Once we're safely in the hallway the door slams behind us. I raise an eyebrow questioningly at Callie.
"She has a date with Owen. He's making her dinner. That's just her weird way of showing nerves." She laughs.
"So where now?"
In reply she turns and unlocks the door in front of her. As I step into the apartment she's already heading to the fridge to retrieve a beer for each of us. I look across the room to Mark who is on the couch looking at us curiously.
"We're here to figure out how to get Blondie back." I answer the unasked question as I sit on the lounge chair near him.
"Ok." He replies taking the offered drink from Callie as she sits down on the other end of the couch.
[Arizona]
The familiar burning feeling hits me as I place the shot glass back onto the bar, it's almost comforting. Almost. I wave Joe down to replace the rapidly emptying bottle in front of me before swigging back the remaining dregs of my beer. Fresh drink in hand I head back to the corner booth I have had claim over all night. Back to wallowing in my self deprecating thoughts. Back to Bradley Delson.
Ten years old. Ten years and eleven months today he told me proudly this afternoon when I visited him. His pride shining through all the sickness. Unfortunately for me pride would not be something I would feel today.
I smiled widely as he told me about the clown his mother promised to get for his birthday party in a months time. As he continues to chatter excitedly about his upcoming party his mother catches my eye. That's all it takes for her to know. There isn't going to be a party. I tried everything and now there's nothing left. Bradley is sick beyond my help.
This feeling of failure is slowly burning a hole in me. At least the tequila is a burn I can control. It's like this every time I deliver the words that take away their last ounce of hope. It burns and I know soon enough another tiny coffin will haunt me in my sleep because I wasn't enough.
A body sliding into the booth across from me snaps me out of my musings.
"Joe called me." Katey states as she places a beer in front of me. I push the now empty bottle in my hand to the side and take the full bottle gratefully.
"You wanna talk about it?" She prods lightly.
"It never gets easier. I keep hoping that one day I'll just become numb to it all."
"It'll get better." Katey says unsure of what exactly I'm talking about.
"I had to tell a mother today that I couldn't fix her son, that I couldn't do my job. He's only ten and even though I tried everything he's not even going to see his next birthday. Everyday feels like I'm fighting a losing battle and sometimes I wonder why I'm still fighting." I sigh, the exhaustion of the day's events sweeping over me.
"Ella Francis." She states. I haven't heard that name in years but she knows as well as I do the importance of Ella.
"You were a first year resident and you still had no clue what field you wanted to specialize in but the day you met Ella Francis was the day that all changed. You changed."
Ella Francis was one of my first patients during my peds rotation. She had been brought in when one morning she complained of a headache, the pain got worse rapidly and caused her to vomit. She loved to draw. Every time I saw her she was drawing something. I had just finished examining her and was updating her chart when I noticed she was drawing again but she was covering her left eye with her hand. Her parents told me she had been doing it more and more in the past few weeks. When I asked Ella about it she said she couldn't colour inside the lines when there were two pictures. A quick eye test and a MRI later confirmed Ella had double vision which was being caused by an ependymoma brain tumour. We took her into surgery that morning and the tumour was completely removed by the afternoon.
When I went to see her to do her Post Op she looked so happy. She was drawing without covering either of her eyes and with a huge smile on her face. When she spotted me she gave me a massive grin and practically started bouncing up and down in excitement. As I approached her she held out a piece of paper to me.
'This is for you Dr Robbins. I drew it with both my eyes!' She said proudly.
"When you came home that night, that picture clutched tightly in your hand, I knew something big had happened. You kept talking about the pure joy in that little girl's eyes. The joy that was there because you made it so she could draw again. That was the day you knew you wanted to specialize in peds, you wanted to help bring that joy to families. You wanted to make it your life's work to help the children when they couldn't help themselves. Everyday you give children their lives back and yes every now and then there is a child you can't save but your only human Zona."
"For every child you can't save there are hundreds that you do, you give all those families back their joy and that's more than most people could even dream of doing. I know for a fact that your office is full of evidence of the happiness you bring into people lives."
I feel the smile growing as I think of all the pictures and keepsakes that I keep in my office at work to remind everyday of the joy. My mind wanders to the one drawing I keep framed at home. The drawing Ella gave me that day, of the smiling blonde doctor surrounded by happy children.
"You're amazing Zona. In fact one might even say you're unbelievably amazing." Katey says smirking playfully. My eyes widen at the hidden meaning in her words.
"Katey." I groan. Looking at me innocently she replies.
"What's wrong Zona? Was it something I said?"
"You know damn well." I pout.
After one particularly hurtful break up during college Katey took me to the local gay bar where we proceeded to get blind drunk. One thing led to another and well things got a little 'coyote ugly'. Namely Katey and I dancing. To Unbelievable by EMF. On the bar.
Thanks to our little performance we were well known in that particular bar. Since that night 'unbelievable' kind of became our song. Whenever we went through a break up or a rough patch in our lives we would have a few drinks and dance. It was our way of reminding each other that we're still alive.
"You love it." She says as she gets up and saunters over to the jukebox throwing an extra swing into her hips just for me. She studies the cds carefully before finding the desired track. She turns around, extends her arm and points straight at me before curling her finger back towards herself, beckoning me over. I wander over and I can't help the smug look on my face when I notice the envious looks I get from several men and women.
When I reach her I begin to sway my hips following her lead. As the riff picks up I step a little closer and roll my body against hers in time with the music. Fully feeling the effects of the alcohol now, I turn and push myself flush against her front. She rests her hands on my hips as we continue to grind against one another. I slide my way down and back up her body. Allowing myself a quick glance around the room I noticed we've gained a small audience, I can't help but feel a little proud that I can still gain this much attention by swinging my hips. This is what the dance is about, feeding off the music flowing through us and the eyes surrounding us devouring our every move.
All too soon the song is over but I feel more alive than I have since Callie. Turning around I smile widely at Katey.
"Thank you."
"Anytime babe. I think it might be time to leave now though." She says with a grin.
"The vultures are circling." She stage whispers, eyeing an overeager tipsy guy heading our way. I giggle all the way as she grabs my hand and pulls me though the crowd towards the exit.
[Addison]
I open the fridge and lean on the door as I inspect the contents.
"Marrrk" I whine. "You're out of beer."
"So go get some from Callie's." He replies not once taking his eyes off Callie's determined to beat her.
"No can do." Callie says laughing at his pathetic attempt to stare her down.
"The twisted sisters had a slumber party last night and they drank the apartment dry. I haven't had the chance to get to the shops yet." She explains.
Things had gotten a little off track when Mark decided that winning a staring contest would prove that his plan would work. His plan that consisted of Callie giving Arizona flowers then dragging her into an on call room to...well anyone could guess where Mark's mind was going. I watch them for a minute before deciding if we're going to get more alcohol it's obviously going to be up to me.
"Right well I need more alcohol to deal with you two." I state, rolling my eyes at their childish game before grabbing my purse and walking out the door.
I pull my coat tightly around myself as I step out if the apartment building. I walk the short distance down the street to the convenience store.
I'm stepping out of the store purchase in hand when I see it.
There right across the street from the store is Arizona stumbling out of Joe's her arm wrapped tightly around the waist of an athletic brunette, who had her arm slung over Arizona's shoulder. I quickly step back into the shadows afraid to be spotted. As they stand outside the bar the brunette wraps her arms possessively around Arizona's shoulders, who in turn rest her head in the crook of the taller woman's neck. I can't tear my eyes away from them as Arizona laughs at something the brunette whispers in her ear.
Part of me wants to confront her, ask her what the hell she thinks she's playing at, leading Callie on to believe she has some sort of chance while messing around with someone else on the side. The thought of Callie back at the apartment, making elaborate plans to win back the love of her life, makes my stomach churn. What if Callie pours her heart and soul out only to find she's missed her chance? She'll never recover from that and I don't think I could see her look so crushed again. I step forward intending to give the blonde a piece of my mind when a taxi pulls up blocking them from view. A moment later it drives away and they're gone.
I sigh, turning to make my way back up to the apartment. On the walk back I have plenty of time to contemplate whether I should tell Callie the truth and have her hate me or if I should just wait and let her get crushed by herself.
As I step back into the apartment I'm met with cheering, drunk cheering, not exactly the welcome back I was expecting.
I look at both of them shocked. Mark is slumped across the couch his head in Callie's lap as she sways in her seat, an half empty tequila bottle swinging dangerously from her left hand.
"You missed the fun!" She slurs.
"Mark couldn't out stare me so he had to sneak into my apartment to see if Cr...Cris...Cristina had a secret stash." She says practically yelling Cristina's name when she can finally wrap her lips around it.
The sudden change in noise level causes Mark to jerk awake. His eyes widen as he sees the bottle Callie is still clutching.
"Jesus Cal, you've nearly finished the other bottle!"
"Other bottle??" I question glaring at Mark.
He nods as he holds up an empty bottle that had been lying next to the couch.
"Mark! We were supposed to be helping her not getting her drunk!"
'Well not that drunk' I think to myself.
"I'm fine and I know exactly what I'm going to say to Arizona." Callie insists.
"Oooh I should call her! She needs to know how much she means to me." She slurs as she stumbles over to her purse.
"No no no no." I say, quickly grabbing the purse before she can reach it.
"You're not calling anyone. In fact I'm taking you to bed right now, you need to sleep this off."
"You're not even going to buy me dinner first?" She laughs at her own joke. I just roll my eyes.
"Come on time to go home." I say as she leans on me for support.
"See you tomorrow." I throw over my shoulder to Mark, who is already slumped over on the couch again.
After much stumbling and giggling, mainly by Callie, I manage to get Callie into her room and on her bed. I lean down and remove her shoes before repositioning her and pulling the covers over her.
"Do you think she'll take me back Addy?" She asks so quietly I almost don't hear her.
"I hope so Cal, I hope so." I reply truthfully.
"I...I don't know what I'll do if she doesn't." She sounds so meek and the tears swelling in her eyes make my heart ache.
I can't help but think back to what I saw earlier and my heart breaks for the woman in front of me. I lie down beside her and wrap my arms around her as the tears begin to slide down her cheeks. I hold her tightly doing my best to comfort her, wishing I could take away the pain, but I know I can't and I know the only one who can may be the very person who breaks her for good.
