Don't own Twilight. I do however own Pat. Yes, I am willing to negoitate.
CHAPTER 3-ALICE'S P.O.V.
I hide on the edge of the parking lot in the woods, looking for my target. Patrick comes out alone and gets in a beat up four-wheel drive truck that looks more primer colored than anything. I follow the truck quickly, cutting through the woods till he's out of town. Once he makes a curve I run a straight line through the woods and leap as he passes, landing in the truck bed so softly he doesn't notice. I lay flat, forcing myself to wait. I don't want him to wreck. I don't want a drop of that sweet blood to go to waste.
The drive isn't long, I'm just anxious. In my mind I'm plotting how I want to do this. Should I grab him once we've stopped or out of his house? I'll snatch him out of his house I decide, then take him into the woods. It's not his fault, so I will make this as painless as possible. I don't want him to suffer. I'll grab him then once I'm finished I'll make it look like an animal attack. I'll drop him in a creek or river, so his lack of blood won't be noticed. I lift my head slightly once we stop, his scent scorching my throat. Soon, soon enough.
I hear a dog barking in the yard. I can smell it and it can smell me. It's angry, though wary about going to the truck. Smart dog. Briefly I think of Seth Clearwater. I'd rather not have to kill the dog too…it would draw more attention if Pat and his dog disappear…but it would be sweet revenge in my book. Oh well… maybe next time. I hear voices in the house, then on the porch. "Yeah, Pat," comes a familiar voice, "it was no problem." Amber? They're standing on the porch and I don't dare breathe. "Oh by the way," Amber says, "that new girl was asking about you. You know…Alice." "Yeah," he replies, "I have some classes with her." "She's cute," Amber says, obviously thinking out loud, "if she'd dress up, she'd be hot." Look who's talking, I think. "I'm not interested, Amber," Pat says firmly. "Bullshit," Amber replies, "if not, then why are you smiling?" I wish I could look up to see this. He's smiling? "Let it go, Amber," he says, his voice quieter. "Really, Pat," she pushes, "you're in high school. You should do more than play ball and drink beer. You should at least TRY to get laid." I catch myself before I snicker. "Like Shawn?" he asks. "No," she says quickly, "you're too nice. But you should at least get a date once in a while." "I'll think about it," he says, "now good night." "No you won't," she calls as she walks to her car.
I almost feel sorry for him. So he doesn't date. Speaking from experience (my last date was before Renesmee was born) I can understand her concern. I bet he'd be a good kisser. He has nice lips. And that stubble…I wonder what it would feel like against my skin…BAD ALICE! Time to focus. My throat literally feels raw just from swallowing all the venom I've produced today, never mind the actual burn I feel telling me I need to feed. My family is going to be pissed…Edward especially. Carlisle and Esme will understand after they fly off the handle. I mean, it's happened before. Emmett killed his singer. Edward's definitely going to be the problem. I mean, he fell in love with his. He'll be a smug bastard, I'm sure of it. I stay in the back of the truck till almost one in the morning.
I look up, the scene perfect for what I'm planning. It's pitch dark, no light on in the house, no moon. There's not even a streetlight…not that I need it. I ease towards the house, trying the room on the far left of the house. My nose leads the way to him. I examine it closely, then touch the window. I slide the screen out and push up gently against the window. It opens with no problem. All too easy. I leap through, landing softly. His scent hits me harder than it has all day, concentrated in his bedroom. He's stretched out, lying on his stomach with the comforter covering his lower body except for one leg peeking out. Heavy sleeper I notice. I lower into a crouch. I'll knock him out, then carry him into the woods…drinking before he regains consciousness. Like I said, all too easy.
A bump from somewhere else in the house breaks my concentration. The bump is followed by a quickening heartbeat. The dog? No, I smell another human. "Pat!" comes a high pitch scream that could only be that of a child. Thinking quickly, I dive out the window, pulling it shut with muffled thud and his door flies open. A little girl, about six, with blond hair comes running into the room, jumping onto the bed with him. "Pat!" she screams again, waking him with a start. "What's wrong, Tori?" he ask, his voice heavy with sleep. "I had a bad dream," she wines, "I dreamed something was going to get you." He pulls her against him. "No one's going to get me, Tori," he whispers, kissing the top of her head. "Because you're the Hitman?" she asks. He chuckles. "Yeah, Tori," he says sleepily, "because I'm 'The Hitman'." This seems to satisfy her. "Now get some sleep," he mumbles. "Can I sleep with you?" she asks, using the puppy dog eyes like I would use on Jasper. Clearly, she's got him wrapped around her little finger. "Sure," he relents, "let's go." She plops down beside Patrick and he wraps an arm around her. "Good night, Tori," he mumbles. "Night, Pat," she says, her eyes already drooping.
I turn at this point and run. What did I almost do? I almost killed him and took him away from that pretty little girl. I am a monster…there's no other word for me. I hurry home. I wonder who she is? He can't be older than seventeen, so I doubt it's his daughter. Sister maybe? What was I thinking? I used to tell Jasper, "it helps if you think of them as people." I forgot that. Ok, think Alice. What do I know about Pat? He has red hair and gorgeous blue eyes. His accent makes me want to purr like a kitten. He plays football and baseball. He drives an old truck. He doesn't date. And my skin tingles when he touches me. What? Where did that come from? He's only touched me once!
I hurry into our yard and bolt through the door. I'd planned on going straight to my room, but the entire family was waiting for me. "Alice," Edward says firmly, "what happened?" I fall to my knees in the middle of the living room, sobbing as I reply the entire event in my head. The tension is heavy in the room as Edward reads through my thoughts. "She didn't kill him," he says finally, "she did go to his house, but she didn't kill him." Everyone breathes a sigh of relief. I continue to sob, my entire body shaking. "It's ok, sweetie," Esme says, kneeling down to hold me, "you did the right thing." "I'm a monster," I wail, falling apart. "You are NOT a monster!" Emmett roars shocking the entire room. "You didn't kill him," he goes on, visibly angry, "I know how hard it is to not kill your singer…I failed…so if you let him live, you are NOT a monster. Please, if you value my sanity, you will NEVER say that again!" I flinch, still quivering.
"He's right, Alice," Carlisle says softly, "you made us proud." "Don't say that," I whine. "It's true," Edward replies quickly, "take it from experience…you did just fine." "But what if I can't keep it up," I say, turning to look in his eyes, "I need to leave." "No," everyone shouts at once. "Alice, you can't leave," Carlisle adds quickly, "in your emotional state…" he lets it drop. "Alice," Edward says gravely, "it's not like with Bella and I." "You can't go to Alaska… no one is there." "The only place you can go is back to Forks…and the pack." I growl viciously at this. There's no way in hell I'm going there. I love Renesmee and Jacob. It's the fact I would be around Seth and Leah that makes this impossible.
Edward, of course, read my mind. "So you see, Alice," he says, "I'm afraid your choices are limited." "Can't we leave?" Bella ask. "On this short of notice," Carlisle interjects, "with nowhere set to go…it would be difficult." I groan. "You'll be ok, Alice," Edward says, kneeling beside me, "just hunt a lot and keep your focus." "What about the other part?" Bella ask. "You know…the vision?" I huff at this. "One thing at a time," Carlisle replies softly, "let's concentrate on keeping this boy alive." "Patrick," I jump in, "but he prefers Pat." There's no reason to refer to him as "boy" anymore. "Then let's work on keeping Pat alive," Carlisle corrects. Is that a twinkle in his eye? "Any suggestions?" "Ignore him?' Emmett asks. "That didn't work for Edward," I reply, still sniffling. "You're not me," Edward replies, "besides, what else can we do?" Emmett turns and looks at me. "It's either ignore him or keep climbing in his window," he says with a shrug, "whatever you decide."
"Ignore him," I say firmly, "it's all I can do." "Can you?" Edward asks, leaning back and crossing his arms across his chest. "Yeah," I say hesitantly, "why couldn't I?" He doesn't respond. "Edward," I say firmly, "yeah he's my singer. But he's a human…and he's NOT JASPER!" I scream at him. Esme hold me tighter against her in response. "No one is like Jasper," Carlisle says softly, trying to soothe me, "and while I refuse to meddle in the love lives of my children…" "What love life?" I snap. "Exactly," Edward snaps back, "although 'what life' would've been a better question." I growl, the sound rumbling from deep in my chest. "Alice," Bella says, trying to soothe me, "speaking from experience, you have four choices. You can leave…kill him…ignore him…or be with him. Three of those four choices are going to hurt him." "Ignoring him would hurt?" Emmett asks. Bella nods. "I remember when Edward did that," she says, her head dropping, "and I didn't know why it hurt…only that it did." She starts chewing on her lip again. "It's not the best solution," Edward says thoughtfully, "but if your mind's made up…you'll have to ignore him."
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I began my plan the next day. "Hi, Alice," he said softly in Spanish. I gave him a nod, but didn't reply. I wasn't breathing and that voice has me feeling a tingle. He gives me a funny look, but didn't respond. Too bad Shawn doesn't get the hint. He follows me like Mike Newton used to follow Bella. The entire day went like this, Pat not even looking at me. The scent is still as bad as yesterday. At lunch, I sneak a couple of glances his direction. He stayed bent over his lunch tray, not talking to anyone. Amber was quietly subdued in Health. It was torture, but I made it another day.
I went hunting as soon as I got home, killing and drinking from four timber wolves. Take that, Seth! Bella looked on disapproving, but didn't comment. I ran straight home and straight up to my room. No one bothered me that night.
The rest of the week went like that. I kept my head down, my breath held, and tried to keep my fantasies at bay. ALL my fantasies. I was having two types. The first was killing him. I had hundreds of fantasies. Delicious fantasies. Everything from taking him right in class to right in his bed as he slept. The school parking lot. On the fifty yard line during practice. The woods. The boy's bathroom. Literally anywhere you could imagine…and believe me, I have an excellent imagination…I daydreamed of feasting on his blood. They always ended the same way though. No matter the scene, that little girl would always appear, tears streaming down her face at what I'd done. This hurt me.
The second type was even more painful. I daydreamed of him. Holding him. Kissing him. Touching him. Making love to him. They were always sweet, and delicious in a different way, but always left me hurting, though in a different way than my other fantasies. My heart, which I thought couldn't ache anymore since I lost Jasper, was beginning to ache again. Is it possible for an immortal being to go crazy? If so, I'm so there. I wonder if Edward heard these? If so, he kept quiet. What would Jasper think? I know what would've happened if it had been me lost, he would've found a way to join me. I'm such a coward.
The rest of the week passed exactly the same way. Pat either ignored me or did such a good job of pretending, I didn't notice. Amber, after being so cheerful the first day, became rather subdued. She still volunteered to partner up with me, but didn't press me for conversation. I got the impression she would rather I approached her. But about what? Has to be Pat. I know she knows him, she was at his house. I'm guessing she was watching the little girl…Tori…but I don't know for sure. Why do I even want to know?
"Because you have feelings for him," comes a voice from my doorway. Edward. It's Friday evening and I survived my first week. "What?" I ask, snarling. "I can hear your thoughts, Alice," he says softly, "and I've been where you are." "You don't know anything about where I've been," I continue to snarl. "You're attracted to your singer," he says simply, "I know something about that." "Bite me," I growl, leaping to my feet. "Alice," comes another voice behind him. Emmett. "Alice, you're not thinking clearly." "Here's your chance to find someone…" "I don't WANT someone," I interrupt, "I'm perfectly…" "NO YOU'RE NOT," his voice booms, startling Edward, "and you might not WANT someone, but you NEED someone." Damn, Emmett is on a yelling binge lately. He crosses him arms across his chest. "I don't have to be Edward to know what you're thinking," he goes on, "I can see it in your eyes when you look at him from across the cafeteria. No, you're not that good at hiding it." I gawk. "He's right," comes a third voice, pushing past the boys. Bella. "I've seen it too. I thought you would come to your senses on your own."
Edward steps into my room, putting his hand on Bella's shoulder. "Do you want to know what he's thinking?" I shake my head. "Yes, you do," Edward continues, moving to sit down on my bed, "because I can see it in your mind." Stupid mind reader, I think. "Exactly," he answers. "His mind is…jumbled. He is in a lot of pain, physically. I'm not surprised, humans can't throw their bodies around like he does and not expect to hurt." I frown at this. "He hides it well…especially from his little sister." "Tori," I say softly. Edward nods. "She is what drives him." Edward sighs. "I don't want to tell his story…I'd rather you ask him. Besides, I think there's probably more to it than I know." "What about…me?" I ask, shocked I voiced this out loud. Edward doesn't seem surprised. "He thinks you're playing games," he replies, "after you showed interest in him that first day in Chemistry, then ignored him the rest of the week. He's made inquiries about you…about us, though he's not suspicious of our secret. You're now the 'spoiled little rich girl'." He frowns at this. I grit my teeth and growl. How dare he think that! He doesn't know anything about me. "No, he doesn't," Edward replies to my thought, "he only knows the impression you left him with." This stops me cold. "You've gotten what you said you want," Edward continues, "you've ignored him and now he's ignoring you." "My question is: are you SURE that's what you want?" With that, he and Bella leave.
Emmett comes and sits beside me on the bed. "Just do it, Alice," he says softly, "here's you chance at happiness." I roll my eyes. Here we go again with the same old argument. "If I were you, I would kill to have what you have." Ok, NOT the same old argument. "What?" I ask. He bows his head in shame. "It still hurts," he says, fighting back a sob, "all this time without Rose. I hide it. I know if she could see me, she'd smack me in the back of the head and tell me to get off my ass and get over it." He pouts. "I swear if I had someone, maybe I could. You, Alice…you have that chance…and I'd kill to have it." I don't have an answer to that. I don't have an answer for what's next either. Emmett, the biggest, strongest, most terrifying of this family, wraps his arms around me and begins to sob. I've never seen this, and I've been with the Cullen's since the 1950's. Even with Rose's death, though I was so deep in my own grief I doubt I would've seen it anyway.
What do I do? I can't kill him, I can't ignore him, and I can't love him. Can I? I wrap my arms around Emmett as he continues to sob. Seeing him so vulnerable literally makes my cold, dead heart break all over again. "Would he understand?" I whisper in Emmett's ear. "Damn right he would," he replies fiercely, "I know he would." Jasper and Emmett were the best of friends before he died. If anyone on this planet knew Jasper, besides me, it was Emmett. "Your happiness meant everything to him," he continues, sitting up and wiping his eyes, though he didn't need to. "For you to not only be alive…but to LIVE. He did his part, Alice…he kept you alive…now you have to do the hard part. Live."
That made my mind up for me. I was going to see him. I couldn't wait until Monday. "Be careful, Alice," Edward said as I crossed the living room. I knew what he was thinking…regardless of my feelings, he was still my singer. I stop. "Is this safe?" I ask. He smirks. "You're the psychic," he mutters, "you tell me." I huff, hating to use my vision. However, in this case…
I see me, sitting in a recliner at the edge of the room, watching him sleep. He's restless, muttering. I can't tell what he's muttering in his sleep. The moon is filtering in through his back window, framing him with moonlight. As beautiful as this vision is, I have to see it for real.
"I think so," I say as my vision snaps back to reality. He smiles. "Then be careful," Edward says, kissing my cheek, "and hunt before you get there."
