Chapter Four:

Fire Within


"Love must be as much a light as it is a flame." –Henry Thoreau

Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar.


After that meeting, things were…different. Suddenly instead of avoiding each other, we slowly began to learn to function around one another. As his official bodyguard, I was now around him almost twenty-four hours. My father would only sleep in rotations for several hours, then checking on Iroh, then another rotation during the night. He had taught me that those are dangerous hours when an assassin could slip in. A bodyguard cannot be lazy, especially in the Royal Palace. I took that teaching to heart, furthering it even more then father had…

It was the morning after my oath had been sworn. We had avoided each other the rest of that day. I opened my eyes and carefully stretched out my arms. The wood panel behind me was hard as the floor was. The hallway was large enough, but private for it was in Iroh's quartered rooms. A door sat across from me. The wooden barrier seemed forbidding in the torched light. I realized that next time I should sleep in front of it. It would be much more difficult for an assassin not to trip over me than!

It was still quite early. I paused, wondering if he was awake yet. Once…Once I had known his habits. Sometimes I had used to sneak into his room and would fall asleep beside him. He had used to hold my hand. "Go to sleep, little one," his child-self said firmly. "I'll order your bad dreams away."

"How can you do that?" I had mumbled half-asleep, trying to keep my four-year old eyes open.

"I'm a prince," he had said simply.

The door before me opened and I stumbled to my feet. My legs were a little…cramped. Lu Ten's eyes narrowed as he stared at me. His figure stood in the doorway, but to me seemed distant and powerful. "Did you sleep here?"

"Yes," I answered, not looking away. I am sure my appearance was disheveled.

"All night?"

"Yes."

Lu Ten looked at me confounded. "Why?" He was taller than I had thought. My head was at the perfect level to tuck underneath his chin…

I shook my head. What kind of thought was that? "It's my duty to protect you," I replied with a careless shrug.

Lu Ten shook his head slowly. "This is just plain stupidity. Don't do this again." His eyes were trained on mine.

I did not look away. On these things, his wishes would have to be discounted. Even if…

"No," I said quietly. "Your protection is above all else."

"You won't stop then?"

"No."

Lu Ten let out a long sigh of frustration. "I hope this doesn't mean you'll have to be with me when I change and bathe."

I led out a strangled noise that was half a laugh and of embarrassment. I looked at Lu Ten with warm cheeks, surprised to see the old twinkle in his eyes. He was teasing me! "I'm only teasing, Keiya," He added quickly. "Don't get all testy because of it."

"Testy?" I finally managed to spew out. I was immensely irritated with that statement. He thought I was testy? What about himself for the last five years?! "You think…I…?!"

Lu Ten chuckled loudly. "You always weren't a morning person," He commented. Suddenly his warm smile of familiarity disappeared, replaced by the distant formality. "I'm sorry, but I must be getting to my training session." He walked on by me and I followed with a burning face. Lu Ten stopped when he noticed I was following him. "What are you doing?" He demanded patiently with a turn of his head.

"I am your bodyguard."

He let out another long sigh and walked on without another word.


After that, the following week commenced in a similar fashion. I followed him about, relearning his current habits. Obviously there were times when he was given certain privacy, but otherwise I was at his side. When he would train, by himself or with his teacher, I would watch or train myself. I quickly grew to admire Lu Ten for his determination and skill. Granted he was no master, but he had the talent of being one someday. Besides, he was a far better firebender then I was and several years ahead in training because of his age. Lu Ten had grown and changed beyond the child I had known, but I had too. Change is part of life; I have begun to understand that now. Occasionally, he and I would converse, even reminiscing over old childhood memories. I will not forget the moment near the end of that week, when he called me something he had not for an age…

Lu Ten and I were in the garden with the favored pond, sitting near its edge as we once had as children. It was one of those hours in the day that was his free time. We sat side-by-side, each lost into each other's thoughts I suppose. "I miss father," Lu Ten stated, bringing him to my attention. I looked at his thoughtful face. "And Reizo."

I tricked my hand in the pond water. "I do too."

"I'm going to join father soon in his campaign," Lu Ten reported in a serious tone. "I'll be leaving in several weeks." My heart leaped at the news. Soon we would be with them! Our family would be whole again!

"That's great news!" I replied joyfully. I looked up at his face, but was surprised to see a peculiar shadow in his dark flaxen eyes. "What's wrong?"

Lu Ten straightened his shoulders, his dark golden eyes clouded, making them unable to be read. "Little one, I want you to remain here."

"What?" I yelped, standing up immediately. I stood over the sitting Lu Ten with a glowering posture. Yet a part of me flickered like a weak flame within. He had called me…little one…just like he had used to. "I am your bodyguard, Lu Ten! Does that mean nothing to you? I am here to protect you!"

Lu Ten looked back at the pond with a brooding face. "I knew you wouldn't understand," He muttered. He rose to his feet and stalked off without another word. It was at times he would stun me with something like this in the last week. There was no way in Agni he was going to make me remain behind!

It was these furious thoughts that Princess Ursa found me when she came to the pond with her usual companion, Prince Zuko. He was easily distracted by her suggestion to go find Lu Ten and spend time with him. She settled herself down next to me with an easy grace. "Is everything alright, Keiya?" She asked in soothing tone.

I glared down at the water. "Your nephew thinks to leave me behind when he leaves for the warfront!" I snarled. "What kind of moron is he? I know I have no experience in war, but neither does he!"

Ursa settled a tranquil hand onto my shoulder. She did not ever touch me. I looked up at her in surprise. "What's really wrong?" She asked me again.

"I…I'm afraid to go," I admitted with slumped shoulders. "I'm a coward," I muttered in loathing.

"It's normal to be afraid of such a thing. Iroh and your father are afraid."

"How do you know that?" I asked, searching her calm eyes.

She smiled sweetly. "I know them very well. The looks in their eyes…It is the same you have now."

"A bodyguard probably shouldn't act this way," I confessed with a shamed face.

"You're human," Ursa responded with a gentle squeeze on my shoulder. "And I think you're more afraid of losing someone then the war itself."

Her words spoke exactly of what I felt. Ever since Iroh and father had left, I had held that fear at bay. Yet now Lu Ten and I were going there. What if I lost one of them? I shook that fear away from myself. "Why is Lu Ten being as stubborn as a young Komodo-Rhino?" I asked, trying to turn the conversation away from myself.

Ursa had a smile on her face that was brilliant with some sort of established truth. "He cares about you," She explained in a sunny tone.

The words from before rang in my mind. "I had thought that the little girl I loved as a sister was gone," His voice said with slight bitterness. The words stung like razors, thought I did not understand why…

"He has an odd way of showing it," I said with an undertone of a growl. "Why can't he just let me do what I was trained to do?"

Ursa still had that knowing smile on her face that was starting to irk me. "Think about it, Keiya." She looked at my eyes searchingly. "Think about why you are acting this way."

"I….I…do care about him," I stuttered out. "He was like my brother to me once."

"And now?"

"I don't know!" I snapped. I instantly bowed my head in apology. Who was I to speak to her that way? "Forgive me, Your Highness."

"It's alright," She answered, lifting her hand away from my shoulder. "I have to go find Zuko now. I'm sure he's driving Lu Ten crazy by now." She rose to her feet and I did so to bow goodbye. She inclined her heard smoothly. "You should think beyond what you see, Keiya." With those last words, she seemed to float away from the garden with her lady's walk. I did not walk like a lady, but like a warrior. I shook my head at the random thought. What was with me? I am a bodyguard. I cannot let Lu Ten tell me when I can and cannot be one! He…He…!

That night I sat in front of his door in attempted meditation, but still on the alert. I could hear Lu Ten getting ready for sleep through the door. The floor beneath me was cool and hard, but comforting. I had argued with him again, but knew I had won. There would be no more talks of me not coming with him. His angry stalking away from me had left me furious in return. What was he to me?

"And now?" Ursa's voice echoed in my thoughts.

I had told her I cared about him. That he had been like a brother to me once. And now…

Now…I…He…

It hit me like a comet. A simple truth….my truth….

I love him.

But not as my brother.

I had always believed that I knew what I wanted and that I knew my own mind. This new understanding of my own feelings toward him shook that belief. I sat in the hallway, lost in my thoughts and feelings. What was I going to do? I had learned that when I want something, I should go for it, within moral reason. Father had taught me that love is a good thing, a gift that should be followed, not rejected.

What was I going to do?


During the next two weeks before we would leave, I found myself centering on things I had before, but with less notice. The look in his eyes when he was amused by a joke of mine or the way the light hit his hair. It was all of these small things that were priceless to me in a way I would not have imagined. …Lu Ten…

Our relationship deepened slowly with each passing day. We were constantly in each other's company once again. We had done this as children, but now…now it was different. In a way that was more precious and beautiful to me then he knew. Two weeks later, Lu Ten and I were on a ship bound for the Earth Kingdom. It was not the typical military vessel, for it was ship meant for the transportation of a favored Royal. There was enough special Royal guard there for me to want to push them all overboard. I was enough for his protection! I seemed to have developed a streak of…jealousy…when it comes to his protection.

Princess Ursa had bid me farewell with Lu Ten in her usual kind way. I…I will miss her. Prince Zuko had ignored me completely to say goodbye to his beloved cousin. There had been a plush ceremony to bid Lu Ten farewell, courtesy of his grandfather, the Fire Lord. I had seen the old man for the first time from a distance. I had melded into the background during the whole celebration, keeping a careful eye on Lu Ten. After that, we were on the viewing deck of the ship, gazing out the paned windows at a dark sea. The Fire Nation had long ago disappeared into the horizon. Lu Ten stood starkly next to me with brooding eyes on the sea. Was he afraid? If he was, he did not show it at all.

It was his eyes, the same as his father's, that I loved the most. There is a sincere look within the darkened flaxen color that has a way of settling any doubts to rest. Lu Ten has a way of speaking to the men he now commands that makes them want to follow him, even if he is a raw beginner in their eyes.

Lu Ten titled his head to look at me, catching me in the act of staring at him. "Have you seen enough?" He asked with a slight smirk.

I turned my head away to stare out the window. "You seemed upset," I mumbled clumsily.

"Is it that obvious?" He returned in a surprised voice. I looked back at his face to see his troubled eyes. He gripped his hands behind himself tightly.

"Tell me," I said in a low voice, lest the men nearby hear us. Lu Ten made a noise of consent.

"I am not supposed to be afraid," He said in a strained tone, "But I am."

I extended my hand cautiously. It seemed eternity before I touched his forearm lightly. I saw his flicker down to my pale hand against his dark sleeve. "I am too," I admitted in a hushing tone. His face held a look of silent empathy. Lu Ten put his other hand over the top of mine. His hand was larger with calluses, but warm and comforting. He did not say anything. Instead, he squeezed my hand in one single gesture.


A room next to his has been assigned to me, but I have kept the tradition I made in the last several weeks of sleeping in front of his door. Iron does not make a comfortable or warm sleeping spot. I miss the hallway in comparison. Lu Ten had entered to retire several hours before. It was in the middle of the night by now. It was our fourth night on the ship. The crew was quite large, but had accepted the fact of my nightly sleeping post. The red lights created an eerie red glow in the dark, narrow hallway. I could hear every clank of anyone's steps and the groaning metal of the ship. It was not a pleasant place to sleep.

I was startled to feel the freezing iron door against my back begin to nudge open. I scrambled to my feet as the door opened with a whine. Lu Ten had shed his usual formal armor for a simple pair of pants and a loose long-sleeved shirt. Colored red, of course. He held the door open with an unreadable face.

"Lu Ten?"

He seemed to be shaken out of his reverie and gave me a small, reassuring smile. "I thought, err…" He paused. Lu Ten was one to say something smoothly and collected if he had anything to say at all. He always considered his words carefully. Lu Ten was…usually not a klutz with his words. "Are you cold?" He asked quickly in recovery.

"Well…yeah," I replied in mild confusion. "But I'm fine," I added hastily. I could not help but to notice how the shirt emphasized his broad shoulders. I slapped the thought away. I had decided not to act on my sentiments. I planned on discussing on it with father. He would know what the right thing was!

Lu Ten's hand trailed down the door to hang at his side. "Of course you are," He said in a low voice. His hand went to the door handle to shut it. "Good night, Keiya."

"Good night, Lu Ten." He shut the door quietly, but the sound haunted my ear drums as I sank back down against the door. I was confused about my newfound feelings.

What was the right thing?

I…I am his bodyguard and he is a prince. And not just any prince, but the only son of the Crown Prince! Iroh's and Lu Ten's positions had not disturbed me before. It was only now the reality of it impacted me. I had been raised in a safe little bubble with them. My father had kept me ignorant in a way of the true reality of their status. How could he have done this to me?!

Life on the ship was more eventful then at the palace. Lu Ten acquainted himself with the men and even dined with them. He drilled with them and learned to know every man under his command. Technically, the entire ship was under his command, but he left the crew and the ship under the captain's command. He only concerned himself with his unit, especially considering the fact he knew little about the functions of a ship. It was only his unit that would leave with us. Lu Ten was to bring his additional troops to aid his father.

The ship was loud and obtrusive to me for I was used to the tranquility of the palace. I did not associate with anyone in the crew or Lu Ten's command. It was not proper bodyguard etiquette, but I also did not want to. I was not used to being around many people. This caused me to stick to Lu Ten even more. Naturally, I analyzed anyone near Lu Ten for any possible threats. There was a general curiosity from the crew about me I suppose, but none bothered to approach me.

In the meantime, our…friendship became closer in ways and yet further apart. When we were in front of the others, we went into our proper roles. It was when we were alone, unseen by the public eye, that it was more what it like had been before…


We were in his room. He sat on a cushioned pillow before a low table in the center of the metal room, pouring over a map of the Earth Kingdom. He was retracing the path we would take by land to Ba Sing Se from one of the Fire Nation colonies, trying to take in every little detail. I leaned against the wall across from him, casually playing with a flame in my hand. It was like a small heartbeat that I could make larger or crush within my palm. Such power within such a small thing. I looked from my fire for a moment to see Lu Ten's eyes on me. He quickly looked back at his map without a word.

I went back to the fire hovering at my palm. I could crush it so easily if I desired too…

"Father once said to me that love is like fire," Lu Ten declared boldly. I looked at him from the fire in surprise. "He said that it can consume you or give you life."

"I don't agree with that."

Lu Ten set the writing brush in his hand down with a thoughtful look. "Why is that?"

My eyes were drawn back the withering flame. It burnt red and gold hues. "Love can be quiet…going unnoticed and when it is, it's a thing that brings you light."

I smothered the flame without another word and looked back at Lu Ten. His expression was one of being taken aback, but not in an ill way. He pursed his lips in thought. "I agree with you, little one," He commented at last.

He had said it again…that name…

"Why do you call me that?"

Lu Ten smiled, which created a natural glow in his eyes. "I used to call you that. You liked it back then."

I shrugged and brushed my shoulder as if I did not care. "It's fine. You're the prince after all," I stated dauntlessly.

Lu Ten chuckled under his breath and went back to his work. How much did he know or realize, I wondered. I hoped…

I paused and held my breath, silently berating myself. Part of me wanted…yet was it right? And what if…what if he did not feel the same? What then? And the Society had forbidden such things…but father had…

What was the right thing?


A/N: Here it is, the fourth chapter of this miniseries! What do you think of Keiya's newfound realization? And of Lu Ten? Thanks for reading and please review.