I do not own any of the characters or storylines from the show etc, etc.

The Five Stages of Grief.

Chapter Three:

Bargaining:

As Michaela fell into a fitful sleep her mind was jumbled with images. Some of them bizarre and made no sense, others were recollections of times past. Her dreams though filled with scrambled images honed in on one memory that Michaela knew well.

It was a beautiful spring day. The sun was shining, and the colourful flowers that were arranged in patterns in the public gardens were in bloom. All of this brightness gave one the impression that nothing could ever go wrong in the world. This was how fifteen year old Michaela felt as she was walking home from school. Unusual to her nature of needing to plan every detail, Michaela decided spur of the moment that she wanted to be amongst all of this brightness. As she lay down on the soft green grass her senses went into overload. The sweet smell of grass filled her nostrils making them tingle all the while the sounds of the birds became music to her ears. A butterfly flew gracefully past as if it was in no hurry to be anywhere in particular. Michaela suddenly had a nagging feeling that her presence was required somewhere, but shook it off as soon as she saw the fluffy, snow-white clouds rolling by. She tried to pick out their many shapes; one looked like a face of a clown, another looked like a horse.

Michaela opened her eyes to see the sun starting to fade on the horizon. She hadn't realised that she had even fell asleep! What would people say? More importantly what was her mother going to say? As she hastily gathered up her things, Michaela remembered what it was she had to do this afternoon; her presence was required at a tea party, at home, for the ladies club; she groaned in recognition of the fact that her mother would not be pleased with her.

Upon arriving home, Michaela timidly opened the door and looked round; it was clear. Creeping towards the steps so no one would hear her, Michaela was just about to step onto the first step when she heard it.

"Where have you been," her mother screeched in an unforgiving tone.

Though she was expecting it, Michaela had jumped in fright from it all the same. She knew it would be pointless trying to explain where she was so she just stood there with a blank expression on her face. So much for the nice spring day, Michaela mused. It was then when Josef came through the door from a hard days work at the hospital. Elizabeth started as soon as he stepped foot in the door, complaining about Michaela's tardiness. Josef had too much of a hard day to put up with Elizabeth's constant barraging, so at the end of Elizabeth's explanation he sent Michaela to her room until further notice.

Once in her room, Michaela became worried of what her father might say when he came to see her as he said he would later. As Josef knocked on his daughter's door, he knew that he could never be angry at his little girl, but he had to do something to appease Elizabeth, otherwise he would be hearing about it for days to come. Michaela let out a deep breath, one she hadn't realised that she had been holding, when her father entered her room to have their talk.

"Now Mike you know that you have to be punished, otherwise I'll be hearing about this for days."

Michaela let a small giggle slip at this but quietened when her father gave her a stern look and for a moment she was worried that her father was really angry, until she saw the twinkle in his eyes, which let her know that he wasn't being completely serious and that he was on her side.

"Now what are we going to do with you," Josef asked now grinning at his daughter. The only response he got though was just a shrug of the shoulders.

"How about a week with Martha in the kitchen," he said with raised eyebrows.

Josef saw the fire in Michaela's eyes and knew that she would try and get out of the punishment as much as she could.

"Three days," Michaela challenged

"Four," Josef replied.

"Two plus I have to do extra work at the hospital," she said smirking knowing that her father wouldn't refuse.

"Alright, but you must apologise to your mother also."

Michaela sighed and agreed knowing that the only part of the punishment she didn't like was the apology to her mother. After giving her father a quick hug, he then left his daughter to do her homework. Josef left shaking his head knowing that he could never refuse his daughters request to help out at the hospital. He chuckled to himself knowing that he was going to have to explain this to Elizabeth,

Michaela woke up in a sweat. It was years ago when that happened, but it seemed only like yesterday; Michaela could still hear her father's laughter. She then realised the time and knew she had to get up now otherwise she would be late for mass. Once in mass Michaela was at a loss as to what to pray for. Her father meant everything to her; he was a good man who helped so many people and saved so many lives; she in a way felt betrayed by God.

"Why couldn't you have taken me instead," she whispered to herself though Rebecca, who was next to her heard and squeezed her hand reassuringly to let her know that she was there. Michaela felt like a small child who was desperate and pleading for something that she couldn't have.

"I'll do anything if you bring him back, I'll even find someone to marry just to make mother happy," she knew she was being desperate, as that was something she would never promise, not even under the most dire of circumstances. By the time mass was over she knew that not even God could bring her father back to her so instead of going home for lunch Michaela decided she needed to be alone and headed to the one place that she could feel a connection with her father; his office.