A/N:The answer to the quiz was... Puzzle of My Heart. The scene at the pier was the scene in the first chapter of that story. Nice job, sshaw101! Good guess CabbieLoverSAC22. I went through Unforgettable just to make sure I didn't write about it in that one and I don't think I did, or at least not intentionally lol Wow. It's almost been a year since I published that story. And it's been almost 2 years since I actually wrote it.
I love that you guys notice the marshmallow moon. I do see it in other fics too so it's not like I originated the term. It's just something special because like I said, it sort of stuck with me, kind of like the guy I share the memory with :) My goodness why am I so gushy right now? Maybe because it's late at night and I usually get my best inspiration to write at this time (Currently penning Victorious one-shots). Anyway, enjoy!
Robbie and I walked back to his car in blissful silence. I was smiling and he was too. Thank goodness it was dark and the moon wasn't too bright to show the tints on my cheeks.
"You thinking about something pleasant?" he asked me by the time we reached the car.
"Something like that," I replied.
He did the unexpected and opened the door for me. Whoa, since when was he a gentleman? Not that he was rude or anything. Robbie was a very respectful person. It's just this chivalrous side of him, aside from the whole opening doors for me and waiting for me and holding some of my textbooks… Wait, what was my point again? Wow, Robbie is a gentleman. I guess I never really noticed that until now.
"You look kind of adorable when you're thinking like that," he said out of nowhere. It was a compliment for sure. And I expected him to blush but he was confident. Impressive.
The car ride home wasn't filled with any grueling conversation like we always had. It was silence and radio as white noise. But it was nice. We'd glance at one another now and then and simply smile before looking away again. Although this silence was nice, it was also killing me. What's going on?
Remember when I said Robbie's a gentleman? Well he proved it more when this time he dropped me off he got out of the car and walked me to my front steps. Weird, but sweet.
"Tonight was fun," Robbie said out of the blue. "I definitely can't wait until next Thursday."
"Thursday?" I asked.
"Cat and Robbie night?" he clarified. "I thought we established that earlier."
"Oh, right." I said almost sure.
"Are you ok?" he asked.
"Yeah," I smiled. Well I shook off whatever this weird feeling was to talk to him. I didn't want to end the night weird. Besides, it really was a fun night.
"Good," he smiled.
I've seen Robbie's smile dozens of times. It's comparable to that of a child's. So innocent and pure. But in the light, there was just something about his features that I never noticed before. He was just as fragile and naïve and scared and semi-confident as I was. About life. About the future. About love.
I guess he felt it too, that heat of the moment that I didn't know I possessed until it happened. It happened. The moment that changed my life forever. But until this day I still don't know if it was a wrong move, or the best move ever.
He kissed me. No wait... I kissed him. Though I think he leaned in first. But then again I bit my lip and when I saw him lean and then hesitate, I just pushed my lips against his so I guess I initiated it. You know what, I'm ruining the moment. WE KISSED.
I replayed it in my mind, those three seconds. Yeah, it was more of a peck on the lips than anything. But it was a kiss. My first kiss. And I'm pretty sure it was his too.
And to think the kiss was the most nerve-racking thing that happened that night. It was only the beginning.
"Well, goodnight," I said and rushed inside. I closed my front door and leaned my forehead against it, but rushed to the window to see if Robbie had left yet.
"Goodnight?" Robbie muttered after I left. He was so confused, but he had enough common sense to step inside his car and drive off.
When his car was out of sight, I slumped on the couch and was just utterly confused. Did we do it right? Did he kiss me long enough? Was I even good? Chizz why am I over analyzing this thing?
I mean, kissing has been going on for hundreds of thousands of years. If the cavemen can do it right, I'm sure I can too. Kissing is a symbol of affection. It's passionate and full of love and- wait… What?! Do… Do I like Robbie?
I shook my head in confusion and walked upstairs to my room. I sulked past Tori's room and her door just happened to be open. She saw me pass by and I think she called my name. I just honestly don't remember anything that happened around me because I was too wrapped up in my confused mind to notice.
"Cat, hey. You ok?" Tori appeared at my door.
"I think so?" I more asked myself than answered her. I slumped on my bed. Tori closed my door and sat at my desk chair.
"What happened? You look like you just saw a ghost."
"I don't know. I just… I feel weird. Like my stomach's kind of weird."
"You need Midol or something? Or maybe some Pepto Bismal?"
"No," I sighed. "It's not that. I don't think so. It's more like a fluttery feeling. Like an anxious thing ugh I can't explain it," I shook my head.
"What happened, are you ok?" My sister was a bit concerned.
"I think so."
"You already said that," she pointed.
"I did?"
"Ok Cat, what's up? You're so confusing."
"That's because I am confused."
"Why would you be confused? What happened?"
"I kissed Robbie."
There. I said it. It's all hanging out there now. And hanging. And hanging. God, why isn't she speaking? She looks like an idiot just staring at me with her mouth wide open. I didn't kill anyone. I just kissed a guy.
"Tori? Hello? Earth to Tori?"
I waved a hand to her. Didn't work. So I clapped my hands. Worked.
"Oh my God, Cat! You kissed Robbie! You kissed Robbie! YOU. KISSED. ROBBIE!" Tori squealed.
Now how come my sister was gushing with all these expected emotions when I was the one who did the kissing? What is wrong with me?
"Whoa calm down, sis. It's just a kiss."
"It's not just a kiss, it's your first kiss!" she cried.
"And how do you know that that was my first kiss?" I quipped an eyebrow.
Tori gave me an 'are you kidding me?' look.
"Ok fine, it was my first kiss."
"Yay!" she cheered.
"But then, why wasn't I going girl crazy like you?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, we didn't even intend to kiss. It's not like we went on a date or something. We just hung out and when he dropped me off it just happened, you know?"
"Hanging out is just the informal way of saying you went out on a date," Tori smirked.
"Whatever. But after the kiss it was just awkward and confusing. I just can't explain it like I said. I feel weird."
"Oh," Tori simply stated.
I looked at her and she was crossing her arms smugly before getting up from my chair and walking towards the door.
"What do you mean 'oh'?" I asked before she left.
"Isn't it obvious?" she said matter of factly.
"What is?" I raised my hands in confusion.
"You like Robbie."
I like Robbie? Was Tori right? No, I can't like him. He's my best friend.
I lied in bed staring at my ceiling, replaying everything that went on tonight. There was no way that my platonic relationship with Robbie had escalated into something more in a matter of hours. I mean come on. Let's be real people. This isn't a movie.
Ok, maybe as I kept replaying the night in my mind I did notice a few things. I started looking at Robbie differently. I grew nervous and confused. But that doesn't constitute that I like him, right? But then that kiss. I touched my lips. I could still feel that weird tingle on them. And I know it was short, but I could still taste his lips on mine. I smiled at the thought of Robbie's lips being the first ones to touch mine. That's when I realized that Tori was right. I turned to my side and stared out my window. The moon was out and shining so bright. It illuminated the night and showed me what was in front of me the whole time.
I like Robbie Shapiro.
I barely slept a wink. I realized I had feelings for my best friend. How can a girl not sleep with that on her mind. And to top it off, I didn't even know if he liked me back.
Robbie came over the following morning. Mom went to work late on Fridays so she'd have actual time in the morning to make breakfast. And for some reason Robbie liked her breakfast. Either that or he was just too afraid to tell her he wasn't hungry, but he would eat her food anyways.
I woke up a little bit early and for once in my life I couldn't decide what to wear. Actually, for once in my life I was worried about what to wear. Weird.
I guess it was still new to me so I settled for comfort instead of style. My signature v-neck and skinny jeans was the way to go, but I added a nice layered thing by wearing two different colored shirts.
I guess I took longer than usually because once I came downstairs Robbie was almost finished with his plate of bacon and eggs.
"Finally, she descends from her room," mom sarcastically shouted. "What took you so long, Kitty-Cat?"
"Oh, I woke up kind of late and didn't find anything to wear right away. I really got to clean my room," I said before sitting at the table.
"Couldn't find anything to wear?" Tori whispered.
"What? I haven't done my laundry," I defended.
"Sure," She winked.
"You look nice today," Robbie complimented before taking the last bite of his bacon.
"Thanks," I shyly smiled. It took every ounce of energy in me not to blush at that very moment.
I glanced at Tori and she smugly grinned. Man I wanted to slap that smile from her face.
"Well hurry up and eat your breakfast before it gets cold. Your father's parents are coming over for dinner tonight and Cat there's no escaping this time. Your grandpa was looking for you."
"But mom, what if Robbie and I have plans today," I complained.
"We have plans?" Robbie asked.
"Robbie, just go with it," said through gritted teeth.
"See, you two don't even have plans. Now come on. Tonight's really important. You can't get away with it. Robbie you are more than welcome to join us for dinner."
"What are you folks having?"
"Probably roasted chicken. Grandpa Jack likes chicken," Tori said.
"Tori. Why?!" I said to my sister.
"What?" She was confused.
"Oh man, I love chicken! I'd love to join you guys for dinner," Robbie told our mom.
"That's why," I told my sister.
"Tori, why don't you invite Andre over since Robbie's here."
"Sure, I don't want to be a seventh wheel, you know?"
"For the love of- never mind," I rolled my eyes and just ate my food in silence.
Mom left for work by 10:30 leaving us to do some chores and run errands. Dad needed to use the truck today to purchase this new couch for his place and didn't leave us keys to his car so Robbie was our designated driver. After we cleaned the kitchen, the three of us got into his car and picked up Andre. We went to Wanko's to pick up a new centerpiece for our table. Mom claims that she still needed to make a good impression on dad's parents regardless if they're together or not. We then went to the market to buy some chicken and spices and some fresh vegetables. I still don't know why mom is making it such a big deal out of our dinner tonight. These errands were ridiculous. Not to mention a waste of time.
But then again, I kind of like being distracted from my thoughts. I didn't have to think about the weirdness between Robbie and I nor did I have to endure awkward moments. But… I kind of did want to know what last night meant.
We got home at around 3, just enough time to tidy up the house and cook. While Andre and Robbie were cleaning our yard (I can't believe they actually mowed the lawn for our mom. I guess she still has that intimidating effect on people), Tori and I started on dinner.
"So…" Tori asked while she blended the spices in a bowl.
"So…?" I asked.
"What's up with you and Robbie?"
I rinsed the vegetables and put them in a steaming pot. "There's no me and Robbie, Tori."
"You know what I mean," she said.
"Well I don't know. I haven't had any alone time to talk to him all day. I was with you or mom was around."
"Do you want alone time with him? I can ask Andre to come inside?"
"I don't know," I hesitated.
"Well, don't you want to figure this out?"
"Figure what out?"
"Your feelings for Robbie. Duh."
"Who says I have anything to figure out and who says I have feelings for Robbie?" I retorted.
"Hm, let's see," Tori said before soaking the chicken in her spices. "You were conscious about what to wear this morning, you were purposely late for breakfast so he'd notice, and you're ignoring him."
"Ok first of all, I already told you I woke up late."
"Why?"
"Because I couldn't sleep last night."
"Well you did come home pretty late. I guess that's understandable. But still, you wanted to dress up for Robbie today."
"You can't prove that," I tried bluffing.
"Mhm," Tori smirked.
"And I didn't purposely come down late."
"Well it doesn't matter anyways because whether you admit it or not, you have feelings for the kid and you should find out if he does too."
I hate when my sister's right.
"Cat, sweetheart, we haven't seen you in forever! How's the arts school coming along?" Nonna asked me.
"I took a semester off because of the flood, remember Nonna?" I giggled.
"But that still doesn't mean you can't stop doing what you do," she said.
That's why I loved my Nonna. She's a smart lady.
"I still doodle if that counts!" I beamed.
"Doodles how lovely!" she smiled. "And what about you, Robbie? What's your talent."
"Trying to catch up with Cat," he joked. Everyone around the table laughed.
"Robbie goes to Tori's school, Nonna. I met him when I went to Sherwood for the semester," I told her. "But he's a really smart guy. Computer whiz."
"Well that could come in handy. You're grandfather, he couldn't fix a computer for the life of him. We went a week without Internet! I couldn't watch that funny kid's web show on that SplashFace website."
"Well I can come over one time to look at your cables. My Mamaw had the same case. She didn't know how to work her router so I fixed it in about 5 minutes."
"Five minutes? Impressive," Grandpa said.
"Told you he was smart," I said.
"He certainly is," Nonna agreed. "Robbie would you ever consider going to Hollywood Arts?"
"Oh no, Mrs. Oliver. I don't have much of an artsy talent like Cat. I'll leave her to all of that."
"She gets that from her father you know," grandpa replied.
"Yes she does," dad winked.
"What do you do Mr. Shapiro?" Robbie asked.
"I'm an assistant director for the theater downtown."
"Dad used to act a couple years back until he injured his back. But they loved his creativity so much that now he directs the plays," Tori informed him.
"Mr. Oliver used to do musicals. Man it was insane," Andre added.
"He went to Hollywood Arts. That's why Cat goes there. She's a legacy," Tori said.
"Wow, Cat really does get her creativity from you," Robbie replied.
"Yes she does," mom agreed. Though I didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.
"Well someone needs to be creative between the two of us," Robbie commented. "I can't draw to save my life!"
"I think that's a perfect balance though," Nonna added. "You know what they say, opposite's attract."
"Huh?" I said.
"You and Robbie, dear. He's the brains and logic and you're the creative and spunk. What an awesome team. Cat, you picked a good one," grandpa winked. Eleven bucks. I really need to keep a tab.
"Oh," Robbie and I said at the same time.
"Grandpa, we're not a couple," I corrected him. "We're just friends."
"Oh I'm sorry, dear. I just assumed since you two connected so well."
"But you just said we were opposite," I furrowed my eyebrows."
"Yes we did. You two compliment each other. Sometimes the best relationships are like that. Take your parents for example," Nonna said. With the exception of Nonna and grandpa, everyone else grew uncomfortable.
"Mom, dad," my dad said.
"Let me tell you something, Robbie," Nonna began. "When I met Jade, oh heavens I thought she was Beck's alter ego. She was dark and ominous – no offense dear."
"None taken," mom smiled. Wow, mom smiled. Nonna must have been right.
"And she was very intimidating."
"And then you have our boy over here who was friendly and always smiling. He was the best drama student and everything," grandpa added
"They met during a school production."
"You went to Hollywood Arts?" Robbie asked my mom.
"Sure did," mom nodded.
"Yep and Shakespeare well he's the ultimate romantic. One reading of Romeo and Juliet and the two were inseparable."
"Cat's grandma and I just couldn't understand how Beck wanted to be with a girl so opposite of him. I mean the only good thing about her was that she was very responsible. And Beck, he was a wild and crazy boy."
"And you know what he told us one day when he threatened to run away with Jade?" Nonna asked.
"What?" mom asked. Apparently, she was interested.
"He said 'you just don't understand. Love doesn't need to be explained. It needs to be felt. And I love her'," grandpa said.
The whole time grandpa repeated that, Dad was looking at mom. And form the corner of her eyes, I knew she was looking at him too.
"So you see, Robbie, Cat," Nonna concluded. "Opposites do attract and it can be real love. Just like Cat's parents. Yep, they're real love."
"Uh, will you excuse me for a second," Mom said before getting up and going to the kitchen.
"I'll be right back. Mom probably needs help with dessert," Tori said before leaving.
After dinner, mom, Nonna and grandpa had some tea while Andre and Robbie played video games with dad and Tori and I did the dishes.
"That was a very interesting dinner, don't you think?" Tori said as she wiped the clean dishes dry.
"Tell me about it. But I thought Nonna's story about mom and dad was really sweet."
"Must have been. Mom never knew dad said that. She told me when I came to see if she was ok."
"Yeah what was that all about?" I wondered.
"Mom and dad were supposed to tell Nonna and grandpa that they were separated tonight. But I guess the plan backfired. They can't tell them something like that now," Tori explained.
"Oh. Wow. No wonder why mom wanted it to be perfect."
"Yeah," Tori nodded.
We finished wiping the dishes dry and glanced around the room. Mom was laughing with Nonna and grandpa. Robbie and Andre were schooling dad in some stupid video game.
"Hey Tori," I asked. "How do you know that you're feeling something as passionate as love or even like?"
Tori understood, and thankfully this time she wasn't teasing me. She was being a sister and actually tried giving me good advice.
"You just do. I mean, look at Andre and me. We're pretty much the opposite but somewhere along the way I felt it."
"Then why do you two fight a lot?" Tori looked at me weird. "I'm not deaf. I can hear you two yell on the phone," I told her.
"We're just going through some rough patches, that's all. But Cat, don't worry about me. Worry about yourself. If you feel what dad felt, then you shouldn't ignore it."
I went through the whole day not being able to really talk to Robbie. After dinner, Robbie took Andre home so I didn't even get a one-on-one to say goodbye. As great as it was to prolong the thing, I was going crazy inside. I had to know. And I had to know now.
Hey Robbie, you awake? - Cat
No – Robbie
I need to talk to you - Cat
Do you want me to call? - Robbie
Meet me at the diner. I'm staying at my dad's and I kind of want to talk in person. – Cat
K. See you in 10. - Robbie
I know it was a lot asking Robbie to meet me at 11 at night, but I just couldn't wait any longer. Thank God I stayed at my dad's because he's not as strict as my mom and he'd let me stay out as late as I wanted. So I grabbed my jacket and left.
I got to the diner a little before Robbie did. It was an old-fashioned place, with a jukebox and roller skating waiters and waitresses. I went over to the jukebox, put a nickel in and flipped through the records. Damn, there were so many love songs. I mean I love the classics don't get me wrong, but I didn't really need Whitney Houston or Diana Ross making me any more nervous than I already am. Ugh, but that's all the greatest hits they had in this jukebox. So I settled for a Beatles song "In my Life." Cute song.
"What's up, Cat. Everything ok?" he asked once he got there.
"I don't know," I said leaning on the jukebox. I couldn't really look at him in the eyes so I focused on the music selections in front of me. Johnny Cash, Elton John, Aretha Franklin – how the hell did you guys come up with these songs about love to sing about? It's getting me sick to my stomach worrying about all of this. I just don't understand why people like this feeling of romance.
"What do mean?" Robbie leaned on the other side of the jukebox.
"I'm just… It's just. God I'm so confused, Robbie."
"About what?"
"You!" I blurted.
"Huh?"
"You know for a smart guy you're really slow," I remarked.
"Har har, I get it," he smirked. "But stop stalling. What's making you confused?"
"It's nothing, it's stupid," I changed my mind at the last minute."
I look my jacket from the table that I set it on and started walking out. It took Robbie all of five seconds to realize he should catch up to me so once I hit the sidewalk, he called my name.
"Cat, wait!"
I stopped and waited. It was the least I could do. I asked him to sneak out and then I leave after just one minute.
"What is it? Come on, you can talk to me. I'm your best friend," he pleaded.
"That's just it, Robbie. You're my best friend," I complained.
"What? Is that a bad thing?"
"No. Well. Yeah. I don't know."
"What's the matter? You're seriously starting to worry me."
"You're what's the matter, I told you that," I hit his shoulder.
"But what did I do?"
"You kissed me last night and then pretended like it never happened the very next day. You can't just do that."
"Um…"
"Do you know how late I stayed up just thinking about that kiss? That's why I overslept! And for once in my life I was confused about everything! I'm never confused! I can be asked to draw Mount Rushmore upside down, and I'd be able to do that so easily. But this. Oh holy hell I have no idea what to do about it."
"Cat, you kissed me too," he muttered.
"I know, and I don't know why I did. But I did. And I know I should have just approached you about it but I thought it was the guy that was supposed to do that. But who the hell am I to say that, I have no experience in this mess. And I went through the whole day with this funny feeling in my gut and I just don't like it and I want it to go away."
"Yeah, I didn't feel so good either," he managed to say in between my rant. If I could invent a machine to turn back time and go back to this very moment, I would slap myself and tell me to shut up.
"And then Tori puts it in my head that I might actually like you as more than just a friend and then everyone and their mother keeps mistaking us as a couple so then I get to think that hmm, maybe they are right. Maybe I do have feelings for you. But I don't know if you do and I don't know if I want to know because what if you don't and then I'd make this whole thing awkward and-"
"Cat. Could you just shut up for like a second, please? Or at least breathe because you're rambling."
Well, at least someone told me to shut up. Time machine, I guess I'll use you another day.
"Sorry," I took a deep breath. "I just, got a lot going on in my head."
"I noticed," he chuckled.
I looked at him. He was still so goddamn calm.
"Well?" I sighed.
I looked at Robbie and for once his face grew serious. It was a start. For what seemed like hours was merely 10 seconds for Robbie to think in this awkward silence. A part of me was excited because now I'd know his side, but then again another part of me didn't want to risk him rejecting me. But, I had to face the music somehow.
He opened his mouth like a centimeter, like he was about to say something.
This was it. I was going to know the truth.
Whatever Robbie was going to say, I just had to accept no matter what. God I hope this doesn't make things awkward.
But the thing was, he didn't say anything.
You would think that was a bad thing right? Nope.
Instead, he leaned forward and gave me another kiss.
Whether this move was right or wrong in the end, at that moment, it felt right.
You want to know what was going through my head during that time? The jukebox. I guess all those ridiculous songs about love… I finally understood.
