Gema: *sitting on ceiling* Chapter 4! Chapter 4! And you came back for
more!!! Chapter 4!
Téa: *sweatdrop* So much for trying to tire her out.
Joe: How does she manage to stay up there?
Mai: Sugar and nothing but. I think she OD'ed again.
Duke: Have you actually seen what she is drinking?! *holds up Gema's entire cocoa mug by the spoon*
Yu-Gi: Oh my gosh! That cocoa is like glue!
Gema: It's my good stuff!
Drake: That is beyond disturbing.
Lara: I think you could use that hot cocoa to hold walls together.
Kevin: Has anyone seen Tristan?
Bakura: He's in hiding.
Joe: Hopefully he's smarter than last year.
Kevin: What do you mean?
Drake: He tried hiding under the hot cocoa table.
Lara: I think someone should call an ambulance.
Mai: Why?
Lara: I don't think Seto Kaiba should be that shade of blue.
Gema: *hugs him* He'll be okay. ^_____^
Bakura: Oh no!!!! *Yami Bakura takes over*
Yami Bakura: This is poorly titled. It's already chapter 4 and nothing has been stolen! *pouts*
Akhana: You want there to be more theft?
Yami Bakura: OF COURSE!!!!
Gema: I have an idea!!!!
Duke: Everyone run!!! *most do*
Gema: *snaps fingers and Yami and Yami Marik appear*
Yami: What is going on?!
Yami Marik: More destruction!!!
Gema: Now, sing!!!!!!!!!!
Yami: What?!
Gema: *laughing* The Yami Barbershop Quartet! SING!!!!!
Akhana: You only have three yamis.
Gema: .... I can fix that! *snaps fingers and Shadi appears*
Shadi: Huh?
Gema: SING!!!!
Yami: He's not an alter-ego.
Gema: Close enough! SING!!! I want carols! NOW!!!!!
Yami Bakura: Why should we?
Gema: I control the keyboard and a Baka Hammer!!!! *evil laughter*
Shadi: I do not like this.
Gema: You have no choice!!! SING MY QUARTET!!!!
Alpha: It's official, she's flipped.
Akhana: Yup.
Alpha: You'd better start the fic before this gets any worse. *cringes as the quartet starts singing out of fear*
"Only 4 hours to Christmas!" announced the timekeeper. (Gema: Oh Tristan! There you are!!!)
(Tristan: How did you find me?! I stayed away from the hot cocoa table!)
(Gema: You were under the candy cane table!)
(Shadi: Help!)
(Alpha: Let me get this straight.. You ran out of parts, so you invented this quartet just to shove the remaining characters in?)
(Gema: Yup! Now SING!!!!!)
(Yami Marik: I want to destroy something...)
(Akhana: Focus people!!! *waves Baka Hammer*)
(All: *gulp*)
"Yes, the Grinch knew tomorrow the Who girls and boys would wake bright and early and rush for their toys," said Akhana the narrator.
"And then, oh the noise!!!" groaned Kaiba the Grinch as he steamed and paced outside of his cave. "Oh the noise! Noise! Noise! Noise!" He was livid.
(Kaiba: Ouch..My chest hurts to move.)
(Téa: It wouldn't surprise me if Gema cracked a rib or two.)
(Kaiba: Ow..)
"They'll bang on Ton-Tinglers," explained the narrator as she glared at the cast, daring them to interrupt her. "They'll blow their Who-Flounders. They'll crash on Giant Jinglers and bounce on Boing-Bounders." The Grinch could recall each of these toys clearly, and the sounds they made even more so. "Then Whos, young and old would sit down to a feast. And they'd feast and they'd feast..."
"And they'll feast! Feast! Feast! Feast!" steamed the Grinch, stamping his feet. "They'll feast on Who pudding and rare who roast beast! That is something I just can't stand in the least." His eyes opened wide in horror "Oh no! I'm speaking in rhyme! AGH! Blast you Whos!!!" His cry of anguish echoed off of the mountain.
(Kaiba: *mutters* Blast you authoress...)
"And the more the Grinch thought about this whole Christmas thing, the more the Grinch thought..." continued Akhana.
"I must stop this whole thing! Why for year after year I've put up with it now! I must stop Christmas from coming!" he stormed to his front door. "But how? Uh! I mean.in what way!" His lips curled into a snarl at the lingering effects of his Who inheritance.
He threw open the door to his home, only to be greeted by a rather unwanted surprise. Joe had gotten into the CD player and had started 'Christmas is Going to the Dogs.' The mutt was dancing around the cave, having fun while Kaiba the Grinch was away. Kaiba stood in the doorway, glaring at him. Joe stopped, not sure what to do.
(Joe: Gema!!!!!!! GGRRRRR!!!)
(Gema: SIT! *crash* You may rabies or something..)
(Joe: *to Akhana* Why are you letting her do this?)
(Akhana: Because she promised me a killer Christmas present! ^______^)
"Are you having a holly, jolly Christmas, Joe?" asked the Grinch, tensely. Joe gave a nervous smile and nodded yes.
"WRONG-O!!!" yelled Kaiba. He picked Joe up by the collar and threw him out into the snow. Joe sank in deep. Then Kaiba the Grinch grabbed the doghouse and threw it out after him.
Kaiba stormed outside and stood over the snow bank, looking down at Joe. Joe cringed. "If you're not going to help me, then you might as well.." The Grinch took a second look at his dog and the snow which covered his face like a beard and hat.
"Then he got an idea," explained Lady Akhana, "a wonderful idea, an awful idea. The Grinch got a wonderful, awful idea."
"I know just what to do!" cackled the Grinch as he raced inside. He grabbed a pair of scissors and some red fabric and started cutting.
"The Grinch laughed in his throat, then he made a quick Sant-y Claus hat and a coat," narrated the narrator. "And he chuckled and clucked at this great Grinch-y trick.."
"Why with this coat and this hat, I'll look just like St. Nick!" laughed the Grinch.
(Gema: It's time!)
(Kevin: Time for what?)
(Gema: Time for the classic Grinch song!!!! Now I want to hear everyone!!!)
(All: *run*)
(Gema: *snaps fingers and they all reappear* That includes the extras!)
(Mako: Why us?)
(Gema: Now sing!!!!)
(All: Errmmm..)
(Gema: NOW!!!)
While the cast was forced to sing, Kaiba the Grinch constructed a fully automated Santa sled with every latest feature imaginable.
You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch. You really are a heal, you're as cuddle as a cactus and as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch! You're a bad banana with a
greasy black heel.
You're a monster, Mr. Grinch. You're heart's an empty hole. Your brain is
full of spiders you've got garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch! I wouldn't
touch you with a 39 ½ foot pole!
You know if you asked the Whos down in Whoville, they won't deny it.
You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch, You have termites in your smile. You have
all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch! Give the
choice between the two of you, I'd take the seasick crocodile!
(Gema: That was fun!!! *laughs*)
(All: Someone save us!!!!!)
By the time Kaiba the Grinch had finished with his sled it was late in the evening. He snuck out to the ledge outside his cave. Joe walked behind him. Kaiba held up a pair of binoculars and watched the Who town. Everyone was a sleep, not a light lit the windows. The Grinch focused on the real Santa, who was waving good night.
(Kaiba: Yeah. Right.)
(Akhana: Do it for the kids.)
"Fat boy should be finishing up any time now," the Grinch muttered to himself. "Talk about a recluse. He only comes out once a year, and he never catches any flak for it! Probably lives up there to avoid taxes."
"Merry Christmas!" waved Santa Claus (played by Tristan) as he rode out of town.
"Oopsies! Forgot about the reindeer!" said Kaiba the Grinch as he focused on Santa's sled.
"The Grinch looked around, but since reindeer were scarce there was none to be found," said Akhana the narrator. "Did that stop the old Grinch? No..."
"If I can't find a reindeer, I'll make one instead," stated Kaiba as he glanced over at Joe. Joe, sensing danger, turned tail and ran.
"Oh Joe!" called the Grinch with mock politeness. "JOE!!!"
"So he called his dog Joe then he took some red thread and tied a big horn on the top of his head," explained the narrator.
Kaiba looked down at Joe, "All right, you're a reindeer. Here's your motivation. Your name is Rudolph. You're a freak with a red nose and nobody likes you. Then, one day Santa chooses you and you save Christmas," explained Kaiba, taking on the tone of a director. "No, forget that part, we'll improvise. Just keep it sort of loosey-goosey. You hate Christmas! You're going to steal it! Saving Christmas is a lousy ending. Way too commercial." He leaned back. "Action!"
Joe stared blankly at him for a moment, then pulled off the big clown nose that had been shoved on him.
(Kaiba: How pointless..)
(Joe: How demeaning...)
"Brilliant!" exclaimed the Grinch. "You reject your own nose because it represents the glitter of commercialism. Why didn't I think of that?! Cut, print, take the cake, moving on." He walked away.
(Drake: I guess that's what happens when you live alone for too long, you begin to lose your mind.)
(Kaiba: Watch it!)
(Gema: Hot cocoa! Cocoa hot! Cot hocoa! Hocoa cot!)
(Lara: Or you could just loose your mind by drinking too much cocoa.)
Kaiba began to fire up his sled. The engine roared to life. Flames shot from the exhaust pipe. It shuddered and shook and slowly began to rise off of the ground.
"Here goes nothing, hot dog. Wow!" he revved the engines and the flames rose more. The sled started to inch forward. Kaiba the Grinch started laughing. "This is nuts!" he cackled.
The sled suddenly shot forward like a rocket. It raced down the slope in an out-of-control spiral. The sled tumbled over and over again, the hover- boosters keeping it from crushing them.
"We're going to die! We're going to die!" whined Joe the mutt, forgetting he was supposed to be silent (gets glared at by authoress). "I'm going to throw up, and then we are going to die! Mommy, tell it to stop!"
Kaiba began to hit buttons on the dashboard. The sled stabilized itself. The vibrating decreased as the sled slowed to a more reasonable speed. It began to coast into town. It came to a perfect stop in the middle of the deserted square.
"All their windows were dark, quiet snow filled the air," said Akhana. "The Whos were all dreaming sweet dreams without care. When he came to the first little house on the square."
"Welcome to Whoville, Joe," muttered the Grinch as he got out of the sled.
Inside the nearest house Drake Lou groaned in his sleep and woke up. "Huh? Did you hear something, Lara?" he asked, shaking his wife slightly.
Lara Lou quickly thought of an answer, "It's Santa! Go right back to sleep!" she said eagerly.
"Right!" agreed Drake Lou with a big smile on his face.
(Lara: Oh brother.)
(Drake: We aren't that naive.)
(Akhana: Whatever you say...)
(Drake: What is that supposed to mean?!)
"Come Joe, this is our first stop," said the Grinch as he crept up their roof.
(Kaiba: You actually want me to break and enter.)
(Gema: Well, DUH!)
(Yami Bakura: *eagerly* Theft?!)
(Gema: We have another stunt double! *Yami Bakura and Kaiba trade places*)
(Kaiba: Thank goodness! *Gema hugs him* Maybe...not..)
(Ishizu: I wonder why he is so interested in stealing the festivities.)
(Akhana: It could have something to do with the fact that I told him there was a Millennial Item hidden somewhere in town...)
(All: -.-;)
(Alpha: Well, this is my cue, too.)
(Duke: Cue for what?)
(Alpha: Cue to find POF. *leaves*)
(All: THANK THE LORD!!!!!!!!)
(Drake: I'm not done with you yet!!!!)
(Akhana: I can't see why you'd want to leave now.)
(Drake: What do you mean?)
(Akhana: Well, you and Lara are sharing a room.)
(Drake and Lara: *blush*)
(Gema: *oblivious to everything else* Kaiba cute!)
(Kaiba: *Faints*)
(All: -.-;)
"Come on Joe, this is our first stop," said Yami Bakura the Grinch.
"The old Grinchy Claus hissed and he climbed to the roof empty bags in his fists," added Akhana the narrator. "He slide down the chimney, a rather tight pinch, but if Santa could do it so could the Grinch. He got stuck only once for a moment or two, then he stuck his head out of the fire place flue where the little who stockings were all hung in a row."
"These stockings," chimed the Grinch.
"He grinned," added the narrator.
"Are the first thing to go," finished Yami Bakura. He pulled out a container of ravenous moths. "Okay fellows, chow time." The moths quickly turned the stockings to ribbons, the presents falling to the floor.
Meanwhile, the Grinch had slipped back to his sled and pulled out a large vacuum hose. He slipped it down the chimney and sucked in anything that wasn't nailed down. On the ground Joe watched as the bags slowly filled.
(Odion: *to Joe* You know I could arrest you because of association.)
(Joe: You wouldn't!)
(Tristan: Of course he wouldn't, he isn't a real cop, after all.)
(Odion: *glares*)
(Joe and Tristan: EEP!)
"Then he slunk to the ice box. He eyed the Whos' feast. He took the Who pudding, he took the roast beast. He cleaned out the icebox as quick as a flash. Why that Grinch even took their last can of who hash!" explained the narrator. "Then he stuffed all the food up the chimney with glee."
"And now," said Yami Bakura the Grinch.
"He grinned," added Lady Akhana.
"I will stuff up the tree!" he cackled.
"And the Grinch grabbed the tree and he started to shove when he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove," chimed the narrator.
(Gema: Switch back! *Kaiba and Yami Bakura switch place*)
(Yami Bakura and Kaiba: What did you do that for?!)
(Gema: Only for a moment! *sweat-drop*)
"Excuse me," called a very sleepy Yu-Gi Lou.
"The Grinch had been caught by this tiny who daughter, who got out of bed for a cup of cold water," explained the narrator.
(Yu-Gi: I am NOT a daughter! It's bad enough you keep calling me short!!!!)
(Gema: It was the only thing that rhymed, sorry.)
"Santa Claus, why, why are you taking our Christmas tree, why?" asked Yu-Gi Lou, naively innocent.
"But you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick, he thought up a lie and he thought it up quick," explained Akhana.
"Why my sweet little tot," said Kaiba the Grinch.
(Kaiba: *grumbles*)
"The fake Santa Claus lied," added Akhana.
"There's a light on this tree that won't light on one side. So I'm taking it back to my workshop my dear. I'll fix up there and bring it back here," lied Kaiba the Grinch.
Yu-Gi Lou smiled, then burst out, "Santa, what's Christmas really about?"
"Vengeance!!!" snapped Kaiba, then he remembered who he was playing. "I mean..presents, I suppose."
"I was afraid of that," sighed Yu-Gi Lou.
"And his fib fooled the child. Then he patted his head, and got him a drink, and sent him to bed," described the narrator.
"Santa?" asked Yu-Gi Lou as he paused on the stairs.
"What?!" snapped the Grinch, annoyed by the delay.
"Don't forget the Grinch," requested Yu-Gi Lou. "I know he's mean and hairy and smelly. His hands may be cold and clammy." Kaiba glared daggers at the boy, which went unnoticed. "But I thinks he's actually kind of .. sweet."
"Sweet?!" asked Kaiba in disbelief. Then, nicer, playing the part of St. Nick, "You think he's sweet?"
Yu-Gi Lou nodded. "Merry Christmas, Santa." The Grinch groaned at those words. Yu-Gi Lou returned to his room and shut the door.
"And when Yu-Gi Lou went up with his cup.."
"Nice kid, bad judge of character," muttered Kaiba.
"He went to the chimney and stuffed the tree up," finished the narrator.
(Gema: STUNT DOUBLE!!!)
(Yami Bakura: Goodie! *Yami Bakura and Kaiba trade places*)
"The last thing he took was the log for their fire" said Lady Akhana. "On their walls he left nothing but hooks and some wire. And the one speck of food he left in the house was a crumb even too small for a mouse."
{In time lapse} Yami Bakura the Grinch slipped into every house, leaving each one completely empty.
"Then he slithered and slunk with a smile most unpleasant around each who home and he took ever present," said Akhana the narrator.
"Clearance sale, everything must go!" he cackled with glee.
When he reached Shayla May's home, he made double sure he swiped the engagement ring, which was sitting on her bed table. One other stop is worth mentioning.
(Gema: Switch back!)
(Kaiba: Why?)
(Yami Bakura: Yes, why?)
(Gema: DO IT! *They switch places*)
Mayor Pegasus was as asleep as the rest of the Whos. He was having a rather pleasant dream. He was also talking in his sleep. Shayla, have you ever kissed a man who had his tonsils taken out twice?"
(Shayla: GROSS!!!!!!!!! *blushes* This is humiliating to have my name used like this!!!!)
"No, silly," answered Kaiba the Grinch, mimicking Shayla May. "But it is an experience I have always longed for."
Mayor Pegasus was puckering up in his sleep.
(Pegasus: *To Gema* You are sick you know that, just sick.)
Kaiba grabbed a cactus off of a nearby table and held it to the mayor's mouth. He'd have an..interesting time shaving the next morning.
(Duke: *dryly* How amusing.)
(Joe: How childish.)
(Akhana: Would you rather do what Jim Carey did in the movie?)
(Joe: And what was that?)
(Akhana: *whisper*)
(Joe: LET ME AT THAT AUTHORESS!!!!!)
(Gema: SIT!!!! *Crash* You'll never learn... Okay, Yami Bakura, you're back in!)
(Yami Bakura: YES!!!)
The Grinch threw the cactus into his sack, then he connected a cable from the end of the mayor's bed to something ^_~ outside.
Soon night was threatening to wane into morning. The Grinch was just finishing his night of theft. The sled was packed to the max. Before he got in, he twisted on light bulb off of the main tree, short-circuiting the rest of the town. Then he hopped into his sled next to his mutt and fired the engines. The sled started to hover.
(Gema: Seto, you're on!)
(Kaiba: Why me?)
(Gema: Because you're awesome!!!!!!!)
(Mai: That's the hot cocoa talking.)
The Grinch was laughing maniacally was the sled started. But with a sputter it died and crashed to the ground. Joe barked and placed a paw on the dashboard.
"Out of gas!" snarled the Grinch. Joe started chuckling. Looks like the heist wasn't as flawless as possible. "What are you laughing at, Rudolph?" He glared at his four-footed companion, then booted him out of the sled.
Up the slope of Mt. Crumpit Joe pulled the sled, weighted down by all the stolen goods.
"It's all you, Joey!" cackled Kaiba.
(Joe: This...Is *gasp* cruel and unusual.)
(Kaiba: *laughing* Mush!)
(Joe: I'd kill you if I had the energy...)
(Gema: SIT!!!!! *crash* Don't threaten my man!!!!)
(Kaiba: *sweat drop*)
"3,000 feet up, up the side of Mt. Crumpit he rode with his lode to the tip top to dump it," said Akhana the narrator.
Kaiba jumped out of the sled happily. "We did it!!!" he laughed as he danced. He turned to his mutt, "That wasn't so bad, was it Joe?" Joe looked up at him, then collapsed from exhaustion.
"They'll be just waking up, and I know just what they'll do," snickered the Grinch. "Their mouths will hang open a moment or two, then they'll all cry, Boo-who!"
In Whoville, in deed, the Whos were just waking up. They slowly wandered around the square in a silent stupor. They all seemed shocked to find everything missing. Dazed and Confused looks abound.
(Gema: All Whos, on stage! NOW!!!!)
(Mai: *sigh* There really is no use arguing...)
"What an embarrassment!" exclaimed Odion as he jumped out of his house and into his car. "I've been robbed!" He put it into gear and pulled away, not noticing the cable which ran from his bumper into the nearest house.
The cable went taunt as the cop car pulled away. With one solid lurch, it pulled Mayor Pegasus' bed behind it. (Hence the ^_~ earlier.) The..problem was that the mayor was still sleeping in it at the time. He was pulled through his own window, into the street, and paraded around the square for all to see. Odion stopped the vehicle. The mayor's bed fishtailed, then stopped to. Mayor Pegasus looked dazed, but, being a good politician, he recovered quickly.
"Mayor May Who! Oh dear!" gasped Odion.
It didn't take long for Pegasus to size up the situation. "Well, I wonder who could have done this?" He looked from blank face to blank face. "I tell you people one thing. Invite the Grinch, destroy Christmas!" He started to get really mad. He turned to his bed and pounded on it. "Invite the Grinch, destroy Christmas!!!" He calmed himself down a few hairs. "But did anyone listen to me?"
"I did!" chimed Keith the flunky.
(Keith: *grumbles*)
(Gema: *Waves Baka Hammer* Don't make me!)
(Keith: *cowers*)
(Akhana: Looks like he is finally learning.)
"No!" said Mayor Pegasus, in the tone someone uses to make others feel guilty. "You choose to listen to a little not to be taken seriously boy! Who hasn't even grown into his nose yet." He glared at Yu-Gi Lou like a parent who discovered a child had a bad report card. "Yu-Gi, I hope you are very proud of what you've done."
Yu-Gi Lou looked down sadly. Pegasus shook a finger at him, unable to say more. His brothers were slowly scooting sideways, to escape the town's gaze.
"If she isn't I am!" stated Drake Lou as he stepped forward. The town gasped in surprise, Drake Lou even seemed a bit taken back himself. "I'm glad he took our presents."
"What?!" gasped Rex Who.
"Well, I'm glad," responded Drake Lou, shrugging his shoulders and smiling slightly. Duke and Marik nodded behind him, supporting him because that is what families do.
"Glad! You're glad that everything is gone," said Mayor Pegasus, in a tone somewhere between sarcasm and temper. "You're glad that the Grinch virtually wrecked, no pulverized Christmas. Is that what I am hearing from you, Drake Lou?" He glared at him.
"You can't hurt Christmas," stated Drake Lou, returning the glare with a condensing look that adults often give immature children. "Because it isn't about the gifts or the contests or the fancy lights. That's what Yu- Gi Lou has been trying to tell everyone." He turned to his son and looked down proudly. "And me, he's been trying to tell me."
"What is wrong with you?" asked the mayor, disdainfully. His tone sounded like he was talking to a simpleton. "This is a child." Keith nodded in agreement.
"He's my child," said Drake Lou, firmly. "And he happens to be right, by the way." A murmur rose through the crowd as it began to dawn on them, too. "I don't need anything more for Christmas than this right here." He put his arms around his wife and sons. "My family." The crowd murmured their approval. "Merry Christmas, everybody!"
Every Who began to greet their neighbor. Smiles began to spread across their faces. It was truly becoming a Merry Christmas.
Lara Lou turned to her husband wearing the brightest smile of all. "Merry Christmas you hunk of burning Who!" with that she grabbed him and the two fell to the ground, making out.
(Gema: They look like they are going to be busy for a while.)
(Téa: Lara, that's enough.)
(Mai: Talk all you want, they won't listen.)
(Kevin: Must they do that in public?)
Duke and Marik seemed slightly (okay, more than slightly) embarrassed by their parents display. They were slowly slipping away. Mai and Ishizu found them.
"Merry Christmas, honey!" greeted Mai.
"And Merry Christmas to you, to!" replied Marik as he hugged her.
(Joe: *steaming mad*)
(Akhana: Sit boy! *crash*)
"Sorry your present got swiped," apologized Duke.
"That's okay, I have you," smiled Ishizu as she put an arm around his shoulder.
(Duke and Ishizu: *glare*)
(Gema: Awwww!!!! They are all in their pajamas! How cute!!!!!)
(Marik: Why do we bother?)
Yu-Gi Lou had also slipped away when the romance had started. He went over to the trashpipe and slipped in it. Soon he was at the dump, the on the trail to the Grinch's lair. "Mr. Grinch! Mr. Grinch!" he called, happily. Christmas finally made sense to him.
(Gema: Where is my quartet?)
(Akhana: Running.)
(Gema: I want music!!!! *snaps fingers and they appear*)
(Shadi: What is the meaning of this?)
(Gema: SING!!!!!!!!)
(Yami Bakura: I refuse!)
(Gema: Baka Hammer!)
(Yami Bakura: X___X)
(Gema: Anyone else refuse?)
(Quartet: *gulp*)
(Gema: NOW SING!!!!!!!)
"And now for the final note in my symphony of downright nastiness!" laughed the Grinch at the pinnacle of Mt. Crumpit. "The crescendo of my odious efforts!" He began to push the sled, still loaded, over the cliff. "The wailing and gnashing of teeth! The bellowing of the bummed out! It will be like music to my ears."
(Kaiba: Can we dump the mutt, too?)
(Joe: Hey!!!!)
(Gema: Hmmm...I'll get back to you on that.)
(Joe: You wouldn't dare!)
"The Grinch paused, and he put a hand to his ear," said the narrator. "And he did hear something rising over the snow. It started in low, then it started to grow."
"Huh? What?" gasped Kaiba the Grinch. It was a carol that he heard.
"But the sound wasn't sad, it sound sort of..glad," said Akhana the narrator. "Every Who down in Whoville, the tall and the small, were singing without any presents at all. He hadn't stopped Christmas from coming; it came.
"Somehow or another, it came just the same!" steamed Kaiba. Joe quickly looked for the nearest hiding spot.
"Mr. Grinch!" called Yu-Gi Lou as he approached the opposite side of the sled.
"And the Grinch, with his Grinch feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling," said the narrator.
"How could it be so?!" he agonized. "It came with out ribbons, it came without tags, it came without packages, boxes, or bags!"
"And he puzzled and puzzed until his puzzler was sore, then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before," explained Akhana.
"Maybe Christmas," started Kaiba, the look of an epiphany dawning on him.
"He thought," added Akhana.
"Doesn't come from a store," he said, amazed. "Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more." He raised a hand to his chest and, for the first time, felt his heart pounding away.
"And what happened then, well in Whoville they say, that the Grinch's small heart grew three sizes that day," said the narrator.
(Gema: It's too much!!!!! *hugs Kaiba*)
(Kaiba: Urk! My...Ribs...)
(Akhana: Not now, Gema.)
(Gema: Hey! Stay out of this or I keep your present!)
(Akhana: Dang it!)
(Joe: This present had better be good, letting her torture us like this.)
(Akhana: Oh, it is. ^__~)
"What's happening to me?" asked the Grinch, feeling things he had never felt before. "I'm all toasty inside."
Joe, sensing a change in him, walked over and jumped onto his chest in dog fashion.
Joe, snickering, "BONSAI!!!!!!"
Kaiba the Grinch gasp in surprise (and pain), "My..ribs..ow.."
(Gema: SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! *multiple crashes*)
(Joe: Owie...)
(Gema: PAWS OFF!!!!!)
A cold winter breeze blew and a low creak was heard. The mutt and the Grinch looked up. The sled was swaying dangerously close to the edge of the cliff. It rocked, about to go over at any moment.
"Oh no! The sleigh! The present! They'll be destroyed!" gasped Kaiba the Grinch. "What is the deal?! Wait!" He raced to it. "This can't happen! It shouldn't, it couldn't, it mustn't, it wouldn't!!! Not now, not then, not ever again! NO!!!"
He dove and caught it by the back bumper. Then he dug his feet in and tried to stop it. But the sled was inching forward. Joe was keeping his distance, but he was barking his encouragement.
"Oh well, it's only toys, right," said the Grinch as he could feel it slipping from him.
"Hi! Mr. Grinch!" greeted Yu-Gi Lou, who had climbed to the very top of the mountain of stolen goods.
"Yu-Gi Lou!? What are you doing up there?!" cried the Grinch, feeling fear for the first time. Not for himself, but for the boy.
"I came to see you. No one should be alone on Christmas," smiled Yu-Gi Lou, innocently. Kaiba the Grinch smiled back. It was his first genuine smile, not fueled by happiness, but by joy. Then the sled lurched forward, half leaning over the cliff.
"NO!" gasped Kaiba as he doubled his efforts to halt it.
"EEK!" gasped Yu-Gi Lou as he felt it going over the edge.
The Grinch, fueled by power he never knew he had, slipped under the sled and began to lift it. He lifted it straight up over his head. "I gotcha, Yu-Gi Lou!"
"You did it!" cheered Yu-Gi. Even Joe was barking happily.
(Gema: WOW!!! That is too much! *legs give out*)
(Akhana: What am I going to do with you, fangirl?)
The sled was soon set right and zipping back to Whoville. Kaiba was skiing behind it. Joe was barking like the puppy he was. Yu-Gi Lou was steering. The whole lot of them were laughing and smiling. The Grinch rounded a curve and flew back into the sled.
"Are you all right?" asked Yu-Gi Lou as Kaiba righted himself.
"Are you kidding?" laughed Kaiba. "The sun is shining and the powder's fresh! Now scoot over, it's my turn to drive!" He grabbed the wheel. Then he looked up and saw Whoville rapidly approaching them. "I'd better slow this buggy down!" He reached for the brake, but it snapped under the pressure.
"We're going to crash!" gasped Yu-Gi Lou.
"Now you listen here young man, even if we are horribly mangled, there will be no sad faces on Christmas," scolded the Grinch. Yu-Gi smiled. Nonetheless, Whoville was dangerously close.
"Help!" called Yu-Gi Lou.
The Whos noticed the rapidly approaching vehicle and even more quickly they raced out of the square, which is where it was heading. It entered the city, taking out a low string of garland while it was at it.
(Gema: Okay, Lara, let Drake breathe. You need to play heroine now.)
"Yu-Gi Lou?!" gasped Lara Lou when she recognized the cry of her son.
"Grinch?!" gasped Shayla May, when she too realized what was going on.
(Shayla: Must you?!)
(Gema: Yes, I must.)
"My baby!" gasped Lara Lou as she formulated a plan quicker than any man would have. She raced to the nearest house and pulled off a string of lights. Shayla May ran over. "Shayla, here, grab an end!"
"By the way, these lights match your outfit perfectly," commented Shayla May. It was her way of being polite.
(Lara: *grumbles* I'm in a bathrobe.)
(Shayla: Bathrobes are not meant for outside winter-wear!)
"Uh oh! This could be a little more difficult to negotiate," said Kaiba the Grinch as he tried to steer the out-of-control sled away from fleeing Whos. "Out of the way! I have no insurance!"
Lara Lou and Shayla May stretched their string of lights across the street in the way of the speeding sled. They clotheslined it perfectly. But, it still had moment, pulled both women off their feet, and continued to drag them behind it. They refused to let go, though.
Drake Lou, seeing his wife and son were in danger, stood directly in front of them and held out a hand. As the sled came to him he placed his hands on the front bumper and dug his feet in, trying to further slow it down. He was pushed ahead of it as his wife was drug behind. The sled was approaching the Christmas tree.
"Daddy! Move!" begged Yu-Gi Lou.
The sled was coasting. Drake Lou was being pushed into the tree. The sled finally stopped. Drake Lou let out a breath he had realized he had been holding.
(Shayla: That was wrong! I have snow in place that should never know what snow is!)
(Lara: Why can't snow be warm?)
"Thanks for the help Drake Lou," commented Kaiba the Grinch.
"Hi, Daddy!" greeted Yu-Gi Lou, eagerly.
"Hi, Yu-Gi, son," replied Drake Lou, still sounding a little shaken.
"Merry Christmas, one and all!" greeted the Grinch as he stood up.
"Oh! It's him!" cooed Téa and Serenity, happily and proudly.
"Mommy!" called Yu-Gi Lou as he ran to Lara Lou.
"Ho! Ho! Ho!" chuckled the Grinch, still in his Santa costume.
"All right, what do we have here?" demanded Odion as he walked over.
"You got me officer," admitted Kaiba the Grinch as he jumped out of the sled, causing the crowd to gasp. "I did it. I'm the Grinch who stole Christmas. And I'm sorry." He held out his hands, ready to be arrested. Téa and Serenity looked concerned, but proud nonetheless. Odion seemed a tad stumped at what to do.
"Aren't you going to cuff me? Put me in a chokehold? Blind me with pepper spray?" asked Kaiba.
Mayor Pegasus walked over, glaring icicles at the Grinch, "You heard him officer. He admitted it." He whispered to Odion, "I'd go with the pepper spray." Kaiba glared at him, indignant.
"Yes, I heard him all right," agreed Odion. "He said he was sorry." The Whos cooed at the comment and display of mercy. "Besides, it looks like everything is here and accounted for." Odion began to survey the sled.
"Help me out here people," said the mayor as he looked around for support. His eyes fell on Keith, but he knew better. "Shayla?!"
"Merry Christmas Pegasus May!" called Shayla. She was on top of the sled, rummaging through the loot. She slid down with a box in her hand. "I'm afraid I do have something for you." She smiled at the Grinch, then shoved the box into Pegasus's hands. "Your ring back." She smiled at the Grinch again. "Sorry, but my heart belongs to someone else."
(Pegasus: I'm saved!!!!!!)
(Shayla: Well....I guess it's better than before.)
(Kaiba: Thanks a lot..)
Kaiba did a double take and Shayla nodded. "YES!" he cheered.
"No hard feelings," said the Grinch as he extended a hand to Pegasus. They shook hands and Kaiba began laughing, "Cheer up, it's Christmas!" The whole town cheered.
"Merry Christmas, Mr. Grinch," said Yu-Gi Lou as he took Kaiba's hand. "Your hand is so.."
"I know," sighed Kaiba the Grinch, "hairy."
"No.."
"What? Greasy? Smelly?"
(Kaiba: You'll be hearing from my lawyers, Gema!)
(Gema: I'd rather hear from your pastor!)
(Kaiba: *gulp*)
"No, warm," smiled Yu-Gi Lou. Kaiba the Grinch smiled back. Yu-Gi Lou started singing.
(Gema: Now I want to hear everyone, and I mean everyone!)
(All:...)
(Gema: NOW!!!!!!)
(All: *sing*)
That night there was a great feast in the Grinch's cave.
"So he brought back the toys and the food for the feast, and he, the Grinch himself, carved the roast beast," said Akhana the narrator.
Tristan: Well, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. *down a cup of hot cocoa.*
Bakura: The story is over!
Tristan: *twitch* *twitch* Dang! *twitch* *twitch*
Kaiba: Thank goodness! My ribs can't handle any more.
Drake: I have an author to murder!!!!!!
Duke: Lay off the killings until after Christmas.
Lara: It wasn't all bad, Drake. ^_~
Kevin: I could have had a much worse roll. *looks at Joe* Much worse.
Joe: Hey!
Akhana: SIT! *crash*
Joe: Why did you do that?
Akhana: For old time's sake.
Marik: I refuse to show up next year!
Shayla: Now that is a plan.
Akhana: *laughing* fat chance!
Ishizu: I am curious, what is this Christmas present you are getting.
Duke: Yeah, the one you let us all suffer for.
Akhana: ^________^
Mokuba: Well...
Gema: Here it is! Gift wrapped too!
Akhana: Yay!!! *Gema hands Akhana Yami, who has a bow on his head*
Yu-Gi: She promised you Yami?!
Akhana: YUP!!!!! ^_______^ *hugs*
Yami: Help!
Akhana: I got you something too, Gema.
Gema: Yay!!!! Mistletoe!!!!!
Kaiba: I'm out of here!!!!!! *runs*
Gema: You aren't getting away from me!!!!! *chases*
All: -.-;
Drake: Well, the fic is over, so that means Alpha should be showing his face again.
Kevin: Where'd he go?
Alpha: *enters* Here I am! And so is POF!
Mai: Great timing...not!
Serenity: Why didn't you help us?
Alpha: And miss the joy of watching you learn about hot cocoa fics?!
Téa: I'm young again! Yay!!!!!
Shayla: It's the simple things that make people happy..
Gema: *holding Kaiba, who is turning blue* And, as Tiny Tim (or Tiny Yu-Gi, depends on what version you are reading) said, "God bless us, every.." ZZZ *falls asleep*
Mai: I knew it! I knew she was due for a sugar low!
Ishizu: Next time, we overdose her quicker.
Akhana: *holding Yami* From all of us on POF; Gema J. Gall, Lady Akhana, Moonlady, Demon Child, Dark Fox & Fox Demon, E-100 Alpha, Star, Diamondlance, Pharaoh Light & Pharaoh Dark, Master of Dimensions, Bakurakrazie, Imp is Insane, Demon of Shadows, Kitty Tigri, Cloud Dragon, Seadragon1012, Livi, and Phantom 1, as well as the Yu-Gi-Oh! cast; Yu-Gi, Yami, Joe, Téa, Tristan, Duke, Mai, Serenity, Bakura, Yami Bakura, Odion, Ishizu, Marik, Yami Marik, Pegasus, Mokuba, Seto, Shadi, Rex, Weevil, Mako, Espa, Noah, Rebecca, Keith, Drake, Lara, Kevin, and Shayla.
All: MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! *starts singing carols*
The End
Téa: *sweatdrop* So much for trying to tire her out.
Joe: How does she manage to stay up there?
Mai: Sugar and nothing but. I think she OD'ed again.
Duke: Have you actually seen what she is drinking?! *holds up Gema's entire cocoa mug by the spoon*
Yu-Gi: Oh my gosh! That cocoa is like glue!
Gema: It's my good stuff!
Drake: That is beyond disturbing.
Lara: I think you could use that hot cocoa to hold walls together.
Kevin: Has anyone seen Tristan?
Bakura: He's in hiding.
Joe: Hopefully he's smarter than last year.
Kevin: What do you mean?
Drake: He tried hiding under the hot cocoa table.
Lara: I think someone should call an ambulance.
Mai: Why?
Lara: I don't think Seto Kaiba should be that shade of blue.
Gema: *hugs him* He'll be okay. ^_____^
Bakura: Oh no!!!! *Yami Bakura takes over*
Yami Bakura: This is poorly titled. It's already chapter 4 and nothing has been stolen! *pouts*
Akhana: You want there to be more theft?
Yami Bakura: OF COURSE!!!!
Gema: I have an idea!!!!
Duke: Everyone run!!! *most do*
Gema: *snaps fingers and Yami and Yami Marik appear*
Yami: What is going on?!
Yami Marik: More destruction!!!
Gema: Now, sing!!!!!!!!!!
Yami: What?!
Gema: *laughing* The Yami Barbershop Quartet! SING!!!!!
Akhana: You only have three yamis.
Gema: .... I can fix that! *snaps fingers and Shadi appears*
Shadi: Huh?
Gema: SING!!!!
Yami: He's not an alter-ego.
Gema: Close enough! SING!!! I want carols! NOW!!!!!
Yami Bakura: Why should we?
Gema: I control the keyboard and a Baka Hammer!!!! *evil laughter*
Shadi: I do not like this.
Gema: You have no choice!!! SING MY QUARTET!!!!
Alpha: It's official, she's flipped.
Akhana: Yup.
Alpha: You'd better start the fic before this gets any worse. *cringes as the quartet starts singing out of fear*
"Only 4 hours to Christmas!" announced the timekeeper. (Gema: Oh Tristan! There you are!!!)
(Tristan: How did you find me?! I stayed away from the hot cocoa table!)
(Gema: You were under the candy cane table!)
(Shadi: Help!)
(Alpha: Let me get this straight.. You ran out of parts, so you invented this quartet just to shove the remaining characters in?)
(Gema: Yup! Now SING!!!!!)
(Yami Marik: I want to destroy something...)
(Akhana: Focus people!!! *waves Baka Hammer*)
(All: *gulp*)
"Yes, the Grinch knew tomorrow the Who girls and boys would wake bright and early and rush for their toys," said Akhana the narrator.
"And then, oh the noise!!!" groaned Kaiba the Grinch as he steamed and paced outside of his cave. "Oh the noise! Noise! Noise! Noise!" He was livid.
(Kaiba: Ouch..My chest hurts to move.)
(Téa: It wouldn't surprise me if Gema cracked a rib or two.)
(Kaiba: Ow..)
"They'll bang on Ton-Tinglers," explained the narrator as she glared at the cast, daring them to interrupt her. "They'll blow their Who-Flounders. They'll crash on Giant Jinglers and bounce on Boing-Bounders." The Grinch could recall each of these toys clearly, and the sounds they made even more so. "Then Whos, young and old would sit down to a feast. And they'd feast and they'd feast..."
"And they'll feast! Feast! Feast! Feast!" steamed the Grinch, stamping his feet. "They'll feast on Who pudding and rare who roast beast! That is something I just can't stand in the least." His eyes opened wide in horror "Oh no! I'm speaking in rhyme! AGH! Blast you Whos!!!" His cry of anguish echoed off of the mountain.
(Kaiba: *mutters* Blast you authoress...)
"And the more the Grinch thought about this whole Christmas thing, the more the Grinch thought..." continued Akhana.
"I must stop this whole thing! Why for year after year I've put up with it now! I must stop Christmas from coming!" he stormed to his front door. "But how? Uh! I mean.in what way!" His lips curled into a snarl at the lingering effects of his Who inheritance.
He threw open the door to his home, only to be greeted by a rather unwanted surprise. Joe had gotten into the CD player and had started 'Christmas is Going to the Dogs.' The mutt was dancing around the cave, having fun while Kaiba the Grinch was away. Kaiba stood in the doorway, glaring at him. Joe stopped, not sure what to do.
(Joe: Gema!!!!!!! GGRRRRR!!!)
(Gema: SIT! *crash* You may rabies or something..)
(Joe: *to Akhana* Why are you letting her do this?)
(Akhana: Because she promised me a killer Christmas present! ^______^)
"Are you having a holly, jolly Christmas, Joe?" asked the Grinch, tensely. Joe gave a nervous smile and nodded yes.
"WRONG-O!!!" yelled Kaiba. He picked Joe up by the collar and threw him out into the snow. Joe sank in deep. Then Kaiba the Grinch grabbed the doghouse and threw it out after him.
Kaiba stormed outside and stood over the snow bank, looking down at Joe. Joe cringed. "If you're not going to help me, then you might as well.." The Grinch took a second look at his dog and the snow which covered his face like a beard and hat.
"Then he got an idea," explained Lady Akhana, "a wonderful idea, an awful idea. The Grinch got a wonderful, awful idea."
"I know just what to do!" cackled the Grinch as he raced inside. He grabbed a pair of scissors and some red fabric and started cutting.
"The Grinch laughed in his throat, then he made a quick Sant-y Claus hat and a coat," narrated the narrator. "And he chuckled and clucked at this great Grinch-y trick.."
"Why with this coat and this hat, I'll look just like St. Nick!" laughed the Grinch.
(Gema: It's time!)
(Kevin: Time for what?)
(Gema: Time for the classic Grinch song!!!! Now I want to hear everyone!!!)
(All: *run*)
(Gema: *snaps fingers and they all reappear* That includes the extras!)
(Mako: Why us?)
(Gema: Now sing!!!!)
(All: Errmmm..)
(Gema: NOW!!!)
While the cast was forced to sing, Kaiba the Grinch constructed a fully automated Santa sled with every latest feature imaginable.
You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch. You really are a heal, you're as cuddle as a cactus and as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch! You're a bad banana with a
greasy black heel.
You're a monster, Mr. Grinch. You're heart's an empty hole. Your brain is
full of spiders you've got garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch! I wouldn't
touch you with a 39 ½ foot pole!
You know if you asked the Whos down in Whoville, they won't deny it.
You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch, You have termites in your smile. You have
all the tender sweetness of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch! Give the
choice between the two of you, I'd take the seasick crocodile!
(Gema: That was fun!!! *laughs*)
(All: Someone save us!!!!!)
By the time Kaiba the Grinch had finished with his sled it was late in the evening. He snuck out to the ledge outside his cave. Joe walked behind him. Kaiba held up a pair of binoculars and watched the Who town. Everyone was a sleep, not a light lit the windows. The Grinch focused on the real Santa, who was waving good night.
(Kaiba: Yeah. Right.)
(Akhana: Do it for the kids.)
"Fat boy should be finishing up any time now," the Grinch muttered to himself. "Talk about a recluse. He only comes out once a year, and he never catches any flak for it! Probably lives up there to avoid taxes."
"Merry Christmas!" waved Santa Claus (played by Tristan) as he rode out of town.
"Oopsies! Forgot about the reindeer!" said Kaiba the Grinch as he focused on Santa's sled.
"The Grinch looked around, but since reindeer were scarce there was none to be found," said Akhana the narrator. "Did that stop the old Grinch? No..."
"If I can't find a reindeer, I'll make one instead," stated Kaiba as he glanced over at Joe. Joe, sensing danger, turned tail and ran.
"Oh Joe!" called the Grinch with mock politeness. "JOE!!!"
"So he called his dog Joe then he took some red thread and tied a big horn on the top of his head," explained the narrator.
Kaiba looked down at Joe, "All right, you're a reindeer. Here's your motivation. Your name is Rudolph. You're a freak with a red nose and nobody likes you. Then, one day Santa chooses you and you save Christmas," explained Kaiba, taking on the tone of a director. "No, forget that part, we'll improvise. Just keep it sort of loosey-goosey. You hate Christmas! You're going to steal it! Saving Christmas is a lousy ending. Way too commercial." He leaned back. "Action!"
Joe stared blankly at him for a moment, then pulled off the big clown nose that had been shoved on him.
(Kaiba: How pointless..)
(Joe: How demeaning...)
"Brilliant!" exclaimed the Grinch. "You reject your own nose because it represents the glitter of commercialism. Why didn't I think of that?! Cut, print, take the cake, moving on." He walked away.
(Drake: I guess that's what happens when you live alone for too long, you begin to lose your mind.)
(Kaiba: Watch it!)
(Gema: Hot cocoa! Cocoa hot! Cot hocoa! Hocoa cot!)
(Lara: Or you could just loose your mind by drinking too much cocoa.)
Kaiba began to fire up his sled. The engine roared to life. Flames shot from the exhaust pipe. It shuddered and shook and slowly began to rise off of the ground.
"Here goes nothing, hot dog. Wow!" he revved the engines and the flames rose more. The sled started to inch forward. Kaiba the Grinch started laughing. "This is nuts!" he cackled.
The sled suddenly shot forward like a rocket. It raced down the slope in an out-of-control spiral. The sled tumbled over and over again, the hover- boosters keeping it from crushing them.
"We're going to die! We're going to die!" whined Joe the mutt, forgetting he was supposed to be silent (gets glared at by authoress). "I'm going to throw up, and then we are going to die! Mommy, tell it to stop!"
Kaiba began to hit buttons on the dashboard. The sled stabilized itself. The vibrating decreased as the sled slowed to a more reasonable speed. It began to coast into town. It came to a perfect stop in the middle of the deserted square.
"All their windows were dark, quiet snow filled the air," said Akhana. "The Whos were all dreaming sweet dreams without care. When he came to the first little house on the square."
"Welcome to Whoville, Joe," muttered the Grinch as he got out of the sled.
Inside the nearest house Drake Lou groaned in his sleep and woke up. "Huh? Did you hear something, Lara?" he asked, shaking his wife slightly.
Lara Lou quickly thought of an answer, "It's Santa! Go right back to sleep!" she said eagerly.
"Right!" agreed Drake Lou with a big smile on his face.
(Lara: Oh brother.)
(Drake: We aren't that naive.)
(Akhana: Whatever you say...)
(Drake: What is that supposed to mean?!)
"Come Joe, this is our first stop," said the Grinch as he crept up their roof.
(Kaiba: You actually want me to break and enter.)
(Gema: Well, DUH!)
(Yami Bakura: *eagerly* Theft?!)
(Gema: We have another stunt double! *Yami Bakura and Kaiba trade places*)
(Kaiba: Thank goodness! *Gema hugs him* Maybe...not..)
(Ishizu: I wonder why he is so interested in stealing the festivities.)
(Akhana: It could have something to do with the fact that I told him there was a Millennial Item hidden somewhere in town...)
(All: -.-;)
(Alpha: Well, this is my cue, too.)
(Duke: Cue for what?)
(Alpha: Cue to find POF. *leaves*)
(All: THANK THE LORD!!!!!!!!)
(Drake: I'm not done with you yet!!!!)
(Akhana: I can't see why you'd want to leave now.)
(Drake: What do you mean?)
(Akhana: Well, you and Lara are sharing a room.)
(Drake and Lara: *blush*)
(Gema: *oblivious to everything else* Kaiba cute!)
(Kaiba: *Faints*)
(All: -.-;)
"Come on Joe, this is our first stop," said Yami Bakura the Grinch.
"The old Grinchy Claus hissed and he climbed to the roof empty bags in his fists," added Akhana the narrator. "He slide down the chimney, a rather tight pinch, but if Santa could do it so could the Grinch. He got stuck only once for a moment or two, then he stuck his head out of the fire place flue where the little who stockings were all hung in a row."
"These stockings," chimed the Grinch.
"He grinned," added the narrator.
"Are the first thing to go," finished Yami Bakura. He pulled out a container of ravenous moths. "Okay fellows, chow time." The moths quickly turned the stockings to ribbons, the presents falling to the floor.
Meanwhile, the Grinch had slipped back to his sled and pulled out a large vacuum hose. He slipped it down the chimney and sucked in anything that wasn't nailed down. On the ground Joe watched as the bags slowly filled.
(Odion: *to Joe* You know I could arrest you because of association.)
(Joe: You wouldn't!)
(Tristan: Of course he wouldn't, he isn't a real cop, after all.)
(Odion: *glares*)
(Joe and Tristan: EEP!)
"Then he slunk to the ice box. He eyed the Whos' feast. He took the Who pudding, he took the roast beast. He cleaned out the icebox as quick as a flash. Why that Grinch even took their last can of who hash!" explained the narrator. "Then he stuffed all the food up the chimney with glee."
"And now," said Yami Bakura the Grinch.
"He grinned," added Lady Akhana.
"I will stuff up the tree!" he cackled.
"And the Grinch grabbed the tree and he started to shove when he heard a small sound like the coo of a dove," chimed the narrator.
(Gema: Switch back! *Kaiba and Yami Bakura switch place*)
(Yami Bakura and Kaiba: What did you do that for?!)
(Gema: Only for a moment! *sweat-drop*)
"Excuse me," called a very sleepy Yu-Gi Lou.
"The Grinch had been caught by this tiny who daughter, who got out of bed for a cup of cold water," explained the narrator.
(Yu-Gi: I am NOT a daughter! It's bad enough you keep calling me short!!!!)
(Gema: It was the only thing that rhymed, sorry.)
"Santa Claus, why, why are you taking our Christmas tree, why?" asked Yu-Gi Lou, naively innocent.
"But you know, that old Grinch was so smart and so slick, he thought up a lie and he thought it up quick," explained Akhana.
"Why my sweet little tot," said Kaiba the Grinch.
(Kaiba: *grumbles*)
"The fake Santa Claus lied," added Akhana.
"There's a light on this tree that won't light on one side. So I'm taking it back to my workshop my dear. I'll fix up there and bring it back here," lied Kaiba the Grinch.
Yu-Gi Lou smiled, then burst out, "Santa, what's Christmas really about?"
"Vengeance!!!" snapped Kaiba, then he remembered who he was playing. "I mean..presents, I suppose."
"I was afraid of that," sighed Yu-Gi Lou.
"And his fib fooled the child. Then he patted his head, and got him a drink, and sent him to bed," described the narrator.
"Santa?" asked Yu-Gi Lou as he paused on the stairs.
"What?!" snapped the Grinch, annoyed by the delay.
"Don't forget the Grinch," requested Yu-Gi Lou. "I know he's mean and hairy and smelly. His hands may be cold and clammy." Kaiba glared daggers at the boy, which went unnoticed. "But I thinks he's actually kind of .. sweet."
"Sweet?!" asked Kaiba in disbelief. Then, nicer, playing the part of St. Nick, "You think he's sweet?"
Yu-Gi Lou nodded. "Merry Christmas, Santa." The Grinch groaned at those words. Yu-Gi Lou returned to his room and shut the door.
"And when Yu-Gi Lou went up with his cup.."
"Nice kid, bad judge of character," muttered Kaiba.
"He went to the chimney and stuffed the tree up," finished the narrator.
(Gema: STUNT DOUBLE!!!)
(Yami Bakura: Goodie! *Yami Bakura and Kaiba trade places*)
"The last thing he took was the log for their fire" said Lady Akhana. "On their walls he left nothing but hooks and some wire. And the one speck of food he left in the house was a crumb even too small for a mouse."
{In time lapse} Yami Bakura the Grinch slipped into every house, leaving each one completely empty.
"Then he slithered and slunk with a smile most unpleasant around each who home and he took ever present," said Akhana the narrator.
"Clearance sale, everything must go!" he cackled with glee.
When he reached Shayla May's home, he made double sure he swiped the engagement ring, which was sitting on her bed table. One other stop is worth mentioning.
(Gema: Switch back!)
(Kaiba: Why?)
(Yami Bakura: Yes, why?)
(Gema: DO IT! *They switch places*)
Mayor Pegasus was as asleep as the rest of the Whos. He was having a rather pleasant dream. He was also talking in his sleep. Shayla, have you ever kissed a man who had his tonsils taken out twice?"
(Shayla: GROSS!!!!!!!!! *blushes* This is humiliating to have my name used like this!!!!)
"No, silly," answered Kaiba the Grinch, mimicking Shayla May. "But it is an experience I have always longed for."
Mayor Pegasus was puckering up in his sleep.
(Pegasus: *To Gema* You are sick you know that, just sick.)
Kaiba grabbed a cactus off of a nearby table and held it to the mayor's mouth. He'd have an..interesting time shaving the next morning.
(Duke: *dryly* How amusing.)
(Joe: How childish.)
(Akhana: Would you rather do what Jim Carey did in the movie?)
(Joe: And what was that?)
(Akhana: *whisper*)
(Joe: LET ME AT THAT AUTHORESS!!!!!)
(Gema: SIT!!!! *Crash* You'll never learn... Okay, Yami Bakura, you're back in!)
(Yami Bakura: YES!!!)
The Grinch threw the cactus into his sack, then he connected a cable from the end of the mayor's bed to something ^_~ outside.
Soon night was threatening to wane into morning. The Grinch was just finishing his night of theft. The sled was packed to the max. Before he got in, he twisted on light bulb off of the main tree, short-circuiting the rest of the town. Then he hopped into his sled next to his mutt and fired the engines. The sled started to hover.
(Gema: Seto, you're on!)
(Kaiba: Why me?)
(Gema: Because you're awesome!!!!!!!)
(Mai: That's the hot cocoa talking.)
The Grinch was laughing maniacally was the sled started. But with a sputter it died and crashed to the ground. Joe barked and placed a paw on the dashboard.
"Out of gas!" snarled the Grinch. Joe started chuckling. Looks like the heist wasn't as flawless as possible. "What are you laughing at, Rudolph?" He glared at his four-footed companion, then booted him out of the sled.
Up the slope of Mt. Crumpit Joe pulled the sled, weighted down by all the stolen goods.
"It's all you, Joey!" cackled Kaiba.
(Joe: This...Is *gasp* cruel and unusual.)
(Kaiba: *laughing* Mush!)
(Joe: I'd kill you if I had the energy...)
(Gema: SIT!!!!! *crash* Don't threaten my man!!!!)
(Kaiba: *sweat drop*)
"3,000 feet up, up the side of Mt. Crumpit he rode with his lode to the tip top to dump it," said Akhana the narrator.
Kaiba jumped out of the sled happily. "We did it!!!" he laughed as he danced. He turned to his mutt, "That wasn't so bad, was it Joe?" Joe looked up at him, then collapsed from exhaustion.
"They'll be just waking up, and I know just what they'll do," snickered the Grinch. "Their mouths will hang open a moment or two, then they'll all cry, Boo-who!"
In Whoville, in deed, the Whos were just waking up. They slowly wandered around the square in a silent stupor. They all seemed shocked to find everything missing. Dazed and Confused looks abound.
(Gema: All Whos, on stage! NOW!!!!)
(Mai: *sigh* There really is no use arguing...)
"What an embarrassment!" exclaimed Odion as he jumped out of his house and into his car. "I've been robbed!" He put it into gear and pulled away, not noticing the cable which ran from his bumper into the nearest house.
The cable went taunt as the cop car pulled away. With one solid lurch, it pulled Mayor Pegasus' bed behind it. (Hence the ^_~ earlier.) The..problem was that the mayor was still sleeping in it at the time. He was pulled through his own window, into the street, and paraded around the square for all to see. Odion stopped the vehicle. The mayor's bed fishtailed, then stopped to. Mayor Pegasus looked dazed, but, being a good politician, he recovered quickly.
"Mayor May Who! Oh dear!" gasped Odion.
It didn't take long for Pegasus to size up the situation. "Well, I wonder who could have done this?" He looked from blank face to blank face. "I tell you people one thing. Invite the Grinch, destroy Christmas!" He started to get really mad. He turned to his bed and pounded on it. "Invite the Grinch, destroy Christmas!!!" He calmed himself down a few hairs. "But did anyone listen to me?"
"I did!" chimed Keith the flunky.
(Keith: *grumbles*)
(Gema: *Waves Baka Hammer* Don't make me!)
(Keith: *cowers*)
(Akhana: Looks like he is finally learning.)
"No!" said Mayor Pegasus, in the tone someone uses to make others feel guilty. "You choose to listen to a little not to be taken seriously boy! Who hasn't even grown into his nose yet." He glared at Yu-Gi Lou like a parent who discovered a child had a bad report card. "Yu-Gi, I hope you are very proud of what you've done."
Yu-Gi Lou looked down sadly. Pegasus shook a finger at him, unable to say more. His brothers were slowly scooting sideways, to escape the town's gaze.
"If she isn't I am!" stated Drake Lou as he stepped forward. The town gasped in surprise, Drake Lou even seemed a bit taken back himself. "I'm glad he took our presents."
"What?!" gasped Rex Who.
"Well, I'm glad," responded Drake Lou, shrugging his shoulders and smiling slightly. Duke and Marik nodded behind him, supporting him because that is what families do.
"Glad! You're glad that everything is gone," said Mayor Pegasus, in a tone somewhere between sarcasm and temper. "You're glad that the Grinch virtually wrecked, no pulverized Christmas. Is that what I am hearing from you, Drake Lou?" He glared at him.
"You can't hurt Christmas," stated Drake Lou, returning the glare with a condensing look that adults often give immature children. "Because it isn't about the gifts or the contests or the fancy lights. That's what Yu- Gi Lou has been trying to tell everyone." He turned to his son and looked down proudly. "And me, he's been trying to tell me."
"What is wrong with you?" asked the mayor, disdainfully. His tone sounded like he was talking to a simpleton. "This is a child." Keith nodded in agreement.
"He's my child," said Drake Lou, firmly. "And he happens to be right, by the way." A murmur rose through the crowd as it began to dawn on them, too. "I don't need anything more for Christmas than this right here." He put his arms around his wife and sons. "My family." The crowd murmured their approval. "Merry Christmas, everybody!"
Every Who began to greet their neighbor. Smiles began to spread across their faces. It was truly becoming a Merry Christmas.
Lara Lou turned to her husband wearing the brightest smile of all. "Merry Christmas you hunk of burning Who!" with that she grabbed him and the two fell to the ground, making out.
(Gema: They look like they are going to be busy for a while.)
(Téa: Lara, that's enough.)
(Mai: Talk all you want, they won't listen.)
(Kevin: Must they do that in public?)
Duke and Marik seemed slightly (okay, more than slightly) embarrassed by their parents display. They were slowly slipping away. Mai and Ishizu found them.
"Merry Christmas, honey!" greeted Mai.
"And Merry Christmas to you, to!" replied Marik as he hugged her.
(Joe: *steaming mad*)
(Akhana: Sit boy! *crash*)
"Sorry your present got swiped," apologized Duke.
"That's okay, I have you," smiled Ishizu as she put an arm around his shoulder.
(Duke and Ishizu: *glare*)
(Gema: Awwww!!!! They are all in their pajamas! How cute!!!!!)
(Marik: Why do we bother?)
Yu-Gi Lou had also slipped away when the romance had started. He went over to the trashpipe and slipped in it. Soon he was at the dump, the on the trail to the Grinch's lair. "Mr. Grinch! Mr. Grinch!" he called, happily. Christmas finally made sense to him.
(Gema: Where is my quartet?)
(Akhana: Running.)
(Gema: I want music!!!! *snaps fingers and they appear*)
(Shadi: What is the meaning of this?)
(Gema: SING!!!!!!!!)
(Yami Bakura: I refuse!)
(Gema: Baka Hammer!)
(Yami Bakura: X___X)
(Gema: Anyone else refuse?)
(Quartet: *gulp*)
(Gema: NOW SING!!!!!!!)
"And now for the final note in my symphony of downright nastiness!" laughed the Grinch at the pinnacle of Mt. Crumpit. "The crescendo of my odious efforts!" He began to push the sled, still loaded, over the cliff. "The wailing and gnashing of teeth! The bellowing of the bummed out! It will be like music to my ears."
(Kaiba: Can we dump the mutt, too?)
(Joe: Hey!!!!)
(Gema: Hmmm...I'll get back to you on that.)
(Joe: You wouldn't dare!)
"The Grinch paused, and he put a hand to his ear," said the narrator. "And he did hear something rising over the snow. It started in low, then it started to grow."
"Huh? What?" gasped Kaiba the Grinch. It was a carol that he heard.
"But the sound wasn't sad, it sound sort of..glad," said Akhana the narrator. "Every Who down in Whoville, the tall and the small, were singing without any presents at all. He hadn't stopped Christmas from coming; it came.
"Somehow or another, it came just the same!" steamed Kaiba. Joe quickly looked for the nearest hiding spot.
"Mr. Grinch!" called Yu-Gi Lou as he approached the opposite side of the sled.
"And the Grinch, with his Grinch feet ice cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling," said the narrator.
"How could it be so?!" he agonized. "It came with out ribbons, it came without tags, it came without packages, boxes, or bags!"
"And he puzzled and puzzed until his puzzler was sore, then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before," explained Akhana.
"Maybe Christmas," started Kaiba, the look of an epiphany dawning on him.
"He thought," added Akhana.
"Doesn't come from a store," he said, amazed. "Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more." He raised a hand to his chest and, for the first time, felt his heart pounding away.
"And what happened then, well in Whoville they say, that the Grinch's small heart grew three sizes that day," said the narrator.
(Gema: It's too much!!!!! *hugs Kaiba*)
(Kaiba: Urk! My...Ribs...)
(Akhana: Not now, Gema.)
(Gema: Hey! Stay out of this or I keep your present!)
(Akhana: Dang it!)
(Joe: This present had better be good, letting her torture us like this.)
(Akhana: Oh, it is. ^__~)
"What's happening to me?" asked the Grinch, feeling things he had never felt before. "I'm all toasty inside."
Joe, sensing a change in him, walked over and jumped onto his chest in dog fashion.
Joe, snickering, "BONSAI!!!!!!"
Kaiba the Grinch gasp in surprise (and pain), "My..ribs..ow.."
(Gema: SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! SIT! *multiple crashes*)
(Joe: Owie...)
(Gema: PAWS OFF!!!!!)
A cold winter breeze blew and a low creak was heard. The mutt and the Grinch looked up. The sled was swaying dangerously close to the edge of the cliff. It rocked, about to go over at any moment.
"Oh no! The sleigh! The present! They'll be destroyed!" gasped Kaiba the Grinch. "What is the deal?! Wait!" He raced to it. "This can't happen! It shouldn't, it couldn't, it mustn't, it wouldn't!!! Not now, not then, not ever again! NO!!!"
He dove and caught it by the back bumper. Then he dug his feet in and tried to stop it. But the sled was inching forward. Joe was keeping his distance, but he was barking his encouragement.
"Oh well, it's only toys, right," said the Grinch as he could feel it slipping from him.
"Hi! Mr. Grinch!" greeted Yu-Gi Lou, who had climbed to the very top of the mountain of stolen goods.
"Yu-Gi Lou!? What are you doing up there?!" cried the Grinch, feeling fear for the first time. Not for himself, but for the boy.
"I came to see you. No one should be alone on Christmas," smiled Yu-Gi Lou, innocently. Kaiba the Grinch smiled back. It was his first genuine smile, not fueled by happiness, but by joy. Then the sled lurched forward, half leaning over the cliff.
"NO!" gasped Kaiba as he doubled his efforts to halt it.
"EEK!" gasped Yu-Gi Lou as he felt it going over the edge.
The Grinch, fueled by power he never knew he had, slipped under the sled and began to lift it. He lifted it straight up over his head. "I gotcha, Yu-Gi Lou!"
"You did it!" cheered Yu-Gi. Even Joe was barking happily.
(Gema: WOW!!! That is too much! *legs give out*)
(Akhana: What am I going to do with you, fangirl?)
The sled was soon set right and zipping back to Whoville. Kaiba was skiing behind it. Joe was barking like the puppy he was. Yu-Gi Lou was steering. The whole lot of them were laughing and smiling. The Grinch rounded a curve and flew back into the sled.
"Are you all right?" asked Yu-Gi Lou as Kaiba righted himself.
"Are you kidding?" laughed Kaiba. "The sun is shining and the powder's fresh! Now scoot over, it's my turn to drive!" He grabbed the wheel. Then he looked up and saw Whoville rapidly approaching them. "I'd better slow this buggy down!" He reached for the brake, but it snapped under the pressure.
"We're going to crash!" gasped Yu-Gi Lou.
"Now you listen here young man, even if we are horribly mangled, there will be no sad faces on Christmas," scolded the Grinch. Yu-Gi smiled. Nonetheless, Whoville was dangerously close.
"Help!" called Yu-Gi Lou.
The Whos noticed the rapidly approaching vehicle and even more quickly they raced out of the square, which is where it was heading. It entered the city, taking out a low string of garland while it was at it.
(Gema: Okay, Lara, let Drake breathe. You need to play heroine now.)
"Yu-Gi Lou?!" gasped Lara Lou when she recognized the cry of her son.
"Grinch?!" gasped Shayla May, when she too realized what was going on.
(Shayla: Must you?!)
(Gema: Yes, I must.)
"My baby!" gasped Lara Lou as she formulated a plan quicker than any man would have. She raced to the nearest house and pulled off a string of lights. Shayla May ran over. "Shayla, here, grab an end!"
"By the way, these lights match your outfit perfectly," commented Shayla May. It was her way of being polite.
(Lara: *grumbles* I'm in a bathrobe.)
(Shayla: Bathrobes are not meant for outside winter-wear!)
"Uh oh! This could be a little more difficult to negotiate," said Kaiba the Grinch as he tried to steer the out-of-control sled away from fleeing Whos. "Out of the way! I have no insurance!"
Lara Lou and Shayla May stretched their string of lights across the street in the way of the speeding sled. They clotheslined it perfectly. But, it still had moment, pulled both women off their feet, and continued to drag them behind it. They refused to let go, though.
Drake Lou, seeing his wife and son were in danger, stood directly in front of them and held out a hand. As the sled came to him he placed his hands on the front bumper and dug his feet in, trying to further slow it down. He was pushed ahead of it as his wife was drug behind. The sled was approaching the Christmas tree.
"Daddy! Move!" begged Yu-Gi Lou.
The sled was coasting. Drake Lou was being pushed into the tree. The sled finally stopped. Drake Lou let out a breath he had realized he had been holding.
(Shayla: That was wrong! I have snow in place that should never know what snow is!)
(Lara: Why can't snow be warm?)
"Thanks for the help Drake Lou," commented Kaiba the Grinch.
"Hi, Daddy!" greeted Yu-Gi Lou, eagerly.
"Hi, Yu-Gi, son," replied Drake Lou, still sounding a little shaken.
"Merry Christmas, one and all!" greeted the Grinch as he stood up.
"Oh! It's him!" cooed Téa and Serenity, happily and proudly.
"Mommy!" called Yu-Gi Lou as he ran to Lara Lou.
"Ho! Ho! Ho!" chuckled the Grinch, still in his Santa costume.
"All right, what do we have here?" demanded Odion as he walked over.
"You got me officer," admitted Kaiba the Grinch as he jumped out of the sled, causing the crowd to gasp. "I did it. I'm the Grinch who stole Christmas. And I'm sorry." He held out his hands, ready to be arrested. Téa and Serenity looked concerned, but proud nonetheless. Odion seemed a tad stumped at what to do.
"Aren't you going to cuff me? Put me in a chokehold? Blind me with pepper spray?" asked Kaiba.
Mayor Pegasus walked over, glaring icicles at the Grinch, "You heard him officer. He admitted it." He whispered to Odion, "I'd go with the pepper spray." Kaiba glared at him, indignant.
"Yes, I heard him all right," agreed Odion. "He said he was sorry." The Whos cooed at the comment and display of mercy. "Besides, it looks like everything is here and accounted for." Odion began to survey the sled.
"Help me out here people," said the mayor as he looked around for support. His eyes fell on Keith, but he knew better. "Shayla?!"
"Merry Christmas Pegasus May!" called Shayla. She was on top of the sled, rummaging through the loot. She slid down with a box in her hand. "I'm afraid I do have something for you." She smiled at the Grinch, then shoved the box into Pegasus's hands. "Your ring back." She smiled at the Grinch again. "Sorry, but my heart belongs to someone else."
(Pegasus: I'm saved!!!!!!)
(Shayla: Well....I guess it's better than before.)
(Kaiba: Thanks a lot..)
Kaiba did a double take and Shayla nodded. "YES!" he cheered.
"No hard feelings," said the Grinch as he extended a hand to Pegasus. They shook hands and Kaiba began laughing, "Cheer up, it's Christmas!" The whole town cheered.
"Merry Christmas, Mr. Grinch," said Yu-Gi Lou as he took Kaiba's hand. "Your hand is so.."
"I know," sighed Kaiba the Grinch, "hairy."
"No.."
"What? Greasy? Smelly?"
(Kaiba: You'll be hearing from my lawyers, Gema!)
(Gema: I'd rather hear from your pastor!)
(Kaiba: *gulp*)
"No, warm," smiled Yu-Gi Lou. Kaiba the Grinch smiled back. Yu-Gi Lou started singing.
(Gema: Now I want to hear everyone, and I mean everyone!)
(All:...)
(Gema: NOW!!!!!!)
(All: *sing*)
That night there was a great feast in the Grinch's cave.
"So he brought back the toys and the food for the feast, and he, the Grinch himself, carved the roast beast," said Akhana the narrator.
Tristan: Well, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. *down a cup of hot cocoa.*
Bakura: The story is over!
Tristan: *twitch* *twitch* Dang! *twitch* *twitch*
Kaiba: Thank goodness! My ribs can't handle any more.
Drake: I have an author to murder!!!!!!
Duke: Lay off the killings until after Christmas.
Lara: It wasn't all bad, Drake. ^_~
Kevin: I could have had a much worse roll. *looks at Joe* Much worse.
Joe: Hey!
Akhana: SIT! *crash*
Joe: Why did you do that?
Akhana: For old time's sake.
Marik: I refuse to show up next year!
Shayla: Now that is a plan.
Akhana: *laughing* fat chance!
Ishizu: I am curious, what is this Christmas present you are getting.
Duke: Yeah, the one you let us all suffer for.
Akhana: ^________^
Mokuba: Well...
Gema: Here it is! Gift wrapped too!
Akhana: Yay!!! *Gema hands Akhana Yami, who has a bow on his head*
Yu-Gi: She promised you Yami?!
Akhana: YUP!!!!! ^_______^ *hugs*
Yami: Help!
Akhana: I got you something too, Gema.
Gema: Yay!!!! Mistletoe!!!!!
Kaiba: I'm out of here!!!!!! *runs*
Gema: You aren't getting away from me!!!!! *chases*
All: -.-;
Drake: Well, the fic is over, so that means Alpha should be showing his face again.
Kevin: Where'd he go?
Alpha: *enters* Here I am! And so is POF!
Mai: Great timing...not!
Serenity: Why didn't you help us?
Alpha: And miss the joy of watching you learn about hot cocoa fics?!
Téa: I'm young again! Yay!!!!!
Shayla: It's the simple things that make people happy..
Gema: *holding Kaiba, who is turning blue* And, as Tiny Tim (or Tiny Yu-Gi, depends on what version you are reading) said, "God bless us, every.." ZZZ *falls asleep*
Mai: I knew it! I knew she was due for a sugar low!
Ishizu: Next time, we overdose her quicker.
Akhana: *holding Yami* From all of us on POF; Gema J. Gall, Lady Akhana, Moonlady, Demon Child, Dark Fox & Fox Demon, E-100 Alpha, Star, Diamondlance, Pharaoh Light & Pharaoh Dark, Master of Dimensions, Bakurakrazie, Imp is Insane, Demon of Shadows, Kitty Tigri, Cloud Dragon, Seadragon1012, Livi, and Phantom 1, as well as the Yu-Gi-Oh! cast; Yu-Gi, Yami, Joe, Téa, Tristan, Duke, Mai, Serenity, Bakura, Yami Bakura, Odion, Ishizu, Marik, Yami Marik, Pegasus, Mokuba, Seto, Shadi, Rex, Weevil, Mako, Espa, Noah, Rebecca, Keith, Drake, Lara, Kevin, and Shayla.
All: MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! *starts singing carols*
The End