Am I doing something wrong? Heck even if I'm doing something right tell
me! I can only improve right? LOL
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Anger
A few nights later, Legolas sat at the dinner table, half listening to the muted chatter around him. He was trying to avoid looking at the empty seat beside him. His mother normally sat there. But she was gone now and the chair was empty. She would never sit there again. He blinked, forcing a fresh wave of tears back. She didn't have a body; she would not be sitting anywhere again. He looked at the food as it was set down in front of him. She would not eat anything again either! She would never pick up a fork to eat her meal, never have a drink again, and never scold him as he tried to fit too much in his mouth. Never never never never. The word echoed through his mind and he looked around desperately, not quite sure what it was that he wanted from his family. Everyone else was talking though about what he wasn't sure. He looked at his plate, unable to bring himself to touch a bite. He whimpered softly, not wanting to touch it yet along eat it.
He felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up at Thranduil who had been observing him intently. "Legolas, eat your dinner." he said firmly. Legolas looked again at his plate and shook his head. "I'm not hungry," he muttered. Thranduil frowned slightly at his order being ignored. "Legolas eat. I have not the patience for your silly games at the moment." Legolas flinched and shook his head, still refusing. Thranduil sighed and leaned over to whisper in his son's ear. "I know you miss your mother Legolas but that is not a reason to not eat." Legolas whimpered again at the mention of his mother yet still did not touch his food. Thranduil's annoyance grew. He had not been in the best of moods today and Legolas's behaviour, however understandable was now irking him no end. "Legolas either eat your food or go to bed. This behaviour is unseemly and nonsensical. Stop it at once."
Legolas winced, wishing his father were not angry with him. He could feel his father's irate gaze on him. He felt his own anger grow within him and he glared back at his father, defiantly. For a moment it was a battle of wills and it was Legolas who gave up first and he sulkily stormed off to his room. Thranduil sighed in frustration, watching him go. Bainalfirin looked at him questioningly. "Adar? What's wrong with him?" She frowned watching Legolas push past a servant. "Should someone go after him?"
Thranduil sighed and shook his head. "Leave him be for now Bainalfirin. He will feel better soon enough." Bainalfirin frowned again and shrugged, turning to her sister Lhendglir to continue her conversation.
Legolas sat in the corner of his room, Naurthûl pulled tightly against him, his teeth biting at the ear. He couldn't cry, he was too exhausted to cry. Besides his tears accomplished nothing anyway. He looked at the images on his walls, the one his mother had painted before he was born. He stood up and ran his fingers over the outline of the familiar figures. They comforted him normally; he knew the songs and stories. His mother had taught them to him. Everytime he looked at the walls of his room he was reminded of his mother.
He pulled away, suddenly hating this reminder of her. He didn't understand why the gods had taken his mother. He hated them for taking her. He hated his mother for leaving him behind. He hated his father for burning her. He hated his brothers and sisters for having more time than with her than them. He hated the creatures that had hurt her so badly. He hated everyone and everything in that moment.
Fury gripped him and he attacked everything in his path. Toys, clothes, and furniture - it all went flying in every direction. Legolas was vaguely aware of the smashing noises he caused. He found his little dagger and slashed at the walls, wanting to rid himself of the sweet smiling faces, faces his mother had put there for him. He was so caught up with his destruction that he didn't even hear his father open the door.
Thranduil was startled by the destruction in Legolas's room. He looked around at the ruined walls, furniture and other items that decorated Legolas's nursery. His temper flared. Melethmir had decorated this room herself; she had painstakingly made sure every detail in here was perfect for her son. And he was ruining it!
"Legolas Greenleaf what do you think you are doing!" he roared, furious. Legolas spun around to face his father. Legolas froze staring at his father, slightly startled by Thranduil's rage. Thranduil stormed in and slammed the door shut behind him. "Have you lost your mind child? Your mother decorated this room especially for you! And this is how you repay her kindness? With destruction? Are you mad?" His sudden rage consumed him and he slapped Legolas across the face.
Legolas's hand flew to his cheek and he stared at his father in shock, more stunned than in pain. His father had never done such a thing to him before. Never. He bit the inside of his cheek to keep from crying out, not wanting to give his father another excuse to slap him. His father did not approve of cowards. He could feel his father's angry glare upon him and he backed away, curling up in the corner, his cheek throbbing in pain.
Thranduil caught himself, feeling disgust at himself for what he had just done. He sighed, running his fingers thought his hair. "Forgive me Titenlaeglass. I did not mean to hurt you." Legolas looked away, feeling betrayed somehow, gripping his toy tightly. Thranduil bowed his head, stung that Legolas wouldn't look at him though he couldn't blame him. "Legolas please don't be mad at me. I am sorry, I do not know what came over me."
Legolas looked up sharply, leaping to his feet, physical pain forgotten. He glared at his father with fury. "How could you do that!" he snarled at his father then he twisted to look out the window. For a moment Thranduil thought that Legolas was talking about his violence then he understood. "It is our custom Legolas."
Legolas trembled with rage. "But you burnt her! She cannot come back to me now! She's gone! She cannot come back," His voice grew shrill. "She's gone! She's gone!" He began to weep, the finality of his own words sinking in. "She's gone! She's gone! She's gone!" he repeated over and over. He slumped to the floor, sobbing furiously with loss. Thranduil gazed at his stricken son and sat beside him. Legolas scrambled into his lap and Thranduil held him tightly. Legolas gripped him back just as tightly, tears streaming down his cheeks. Thranduil cried with him. Father and son remained like that for awhile, sharing in each others sorrow and grief.
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More to come soon! Remember reviews and criticism are always welcome
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Anger
A few nights later, Legolas sat at the dinner table, half listening to the muted chatter around him. He was trying to avoid looking at the empty seat beside him. His mother normally sat there. But she was gone now and the chair was empty. She would never sit there again. He blinked, forcing a fresh wave of tears back. She didn't have a body; she would not be sitting anywhere again. He looked at the food as it was set down in front of him. She would not eat anything again either! She would never pick up a fork to eat her meal, never have a drink again, and never scold him as he tried to fit too much in his mouth. Never never never never. The word echoed through his mind and he looked around desperately, not quite sure what it was that he wanted from his family. Everyone else was talking though about what he wasn't sure. He looked at his plate, unable to bring himself to touch a bite. He whimpered softly, not wanting to touch it yet along eat it.
He felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up at Thranduil who had been observing him intently. "Legolas, eat your dinner." he said firmly. Legolas looked again at his plate and shook his head. "I'm not hungry," he muttered. Thranduil frowned slightly at his order being ignored. "Legolas eat. I have not the patience for your silly games at the moment." Legolas flinched and shook his head, still refusing. Thranduil sighed and leaned over to whisper in his son's ear. "I know you miss your mother Legolas but that is not a reason to not eat." Legolas whimpered again at the mention of his mother yet still did not touch his food. Thranduil's annoyance grew. He had not been in the best of moods today and Legolas's behaviour, however understandable was now irking him no end. "Legolas either eat your food or go to bed. This behaviour is unseemly and nonsensical. Stop it at once."
Legolas winced, wishing his father were not angry with him. He could feel his father's irate gaze on him. He felt his own anger grow within him and he glared back at his father, defiantly. For a moment it was a battle of wills and it was Legolas who gave up first and he sulkily stormed off to his room. Thranduil sighed in frustration, watching him go. Bainalfirin looked at him questioningly. "Adar? What's wrong with him?" She frowned watching Legolas push past a servant. "Should someone go after him?"
Thranduil sighed and shook his head. "Leave him be for now Bainalfirin. He will feel better soon enough." Bainalfirin frowned again and shrugged, turning to her sister Lhendglir to continue her conversation.
Legolas sat in the corner of his room, Naurthûl pulled tightly against him, his teeth biting at the ear. He couldn't cry, he was too exhausted to cry. Besides his tears accomplished nothing anyway. He looked at the images on his walls, the one his mother had painted before he was born. He stood up and ran his fingers over the outline of the familiar figures. They comforted him normally; he knew the songs and stories. His mother had taught them to him. Everytime he looked at the walls of his room he was reminded of his mother.
He pulled away, suddenly hating this reminder of her. He didn't understand why the gods had taken his mother. He hated them for taking her. He hated his mother for leaving him behind. He hated his father for burning her. He hated his brothers and sisters for having more time than with her than them. He hated the creatures that had hurt her so badly. He hated everyone and everything in that moment.
Fury gripped him and he attacked everything in his path. Toys, clothes, and furniture - it all went flying in every direction. Legolas was vaguely aware of the smashing noises he caused. He found his little dagger and slashed at the walls, wanting to rid himself of the sweet smiling faces, faces his mother had put there for him. He was so caught up with his destruction that he didn't even hear his father open the door.
Thranduil was startled by the destruction in Legolas's room. He looked around at the ruined walls, furniture and other items that decorated Legolas's nursery. His temper flared. Melethmir had decorated this room herself; she had painstakingly made sure every detail in here was perfect for her son. And he was ruining it!
"Legolas Greenleaf what do you think you are doing!" he roared, furious. Legolas spun around to face his father. Legolas froze staring at his father, slightly startled by Thranduil's rage. Thranduil stormed in and slammed the door shut behind him. "Have you lost your mind child? Your mother decorated this room especially for you! And this is how you repay her kindness? With destruction? Are you mad?" His sudden rage consumed him and he slapped Legolas across the face.
Legolas's hand flew to his cheek and he stared at his father in shock, more stunned than in pain. His father had never done such a thing to him before. Never. He bit the inside of his cheek to keep from crying out, not wanting to give his father another excuse to slap him. His father did not approve of cowards. He could feel his father's angry glare upon him and he backed away, curling up in the corner, his cheek throbbing in pain.
Thranduil caught himself, feeling disgust at himself for what he had just done. He sighed, running his fingers thought his hair. "Forgive me Titenlaeglass. I did not mean to hurt you." Legolas looked away, feeling betrayed somehow, gripping his toy tightly. Thranduil bowed his head, stung that Legolas wouldn't look at him though he couldn't blame him. "Legolas please don't be mad at me. I am sorry, I do not know what came over me."
Legolas looked up sharply, leaping to his feet, physical pain forgotten. He glared at his father with fury. "How could you do that!" he snarled at his father then he twisted to look out the window. For a moment Thranduil thought that Legolas was talking about his violence then he understood. "It is our custom Legolas."
Legolas trembled with rage. "But you burnt her! She cannot come back to me now! She's gone! She cannot come back," His voice grew shrill. "She's gone! She's gone!" He began to weep, the finality of his own words sinking in. "She's gone! She's gone! She's gone!" he repeated over and over. He slumped to the floor, sobbing furiously with loss. Thranduil gazed at his stricken son and sat beside him. Legolas scrambled into his lap and Thranduil held him tightly. Legolas gripped him back just as tightly, tears streaming down his cheeks. Thranduil cried with him. Father and son remained like that for awhile, sharing in each others sorrow and grief.
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More to come soon! Remember reviews and criticism are always welcome