Chapter 4 - Dead Before He Likes Her

Derek held her and kissed passionately but after a while he had to released his arms around her waist and leave the room. Meredith giggled to herself softly before she turned around to get dressed. When she came down Derek was pouring coffee into two mugs.
"Thanks" Meredith said as she took one of them and sat down. She had so much she wanted to ask she had no idea about these kinds of things. She had never kissed anyone, especially no one like him. So what the hell did all of this mean she asked herself.

Derek glanced at her when she came into the kitchen in sweatpants and a large hoodie, and she still managed to take his breath away- He smiled and sat down beside her. After several long minutes of silence from both of them Derek started to feel uncomfortable. He didn't know what this meant, he had never felt like this. Like he wanted to just be with her, no matter what. It had always been just meaningless sex or dating someone because of who she was, because people had said that they would look good together. Meredith was nothing like that, if Mark knew about her he'd be shocked. Derek chuckled to himself at the thought and Meredith looked up at him.

"What?" she said and looked at him suspiciously.
"Nothing, I was just thinking about a friend in New York" Derek said.
"Oh, do you miss it?" Meredith asked
"Miss what?"
"New York" she said and rolled her eyes.
"Oh, New York, yeah, a little. I mean I miss my friends and everything but I like it here too."
"Well that's good" Meredith grinned just slightly. She hadn't done that in a long time, not really.

After that they went back to the uncomfortable silence and just sat there. Meredith wanted to say something, or ask him what all of this meant. But how? Should she just ask him straight out? She looked down at her hands in her lap. One of them was freighting with the clock on her wrist. That was a habit she had picked up from her mother, Ellis did it when she was nervous and now so did Meredith.

Derek studied her for a moment before he cleared his throat
"So.." Derek panted.
"What does this mean?" Meredith blurted out and leaned over the table with her arms crossed under her chest.
"What?" Derek asked with a nervous laugh
"All of this, the kissing, the glancing, the talking, what does this mean?"
"What do you mean, what does this mean?" Derek looked at her in confusion, he wanted to be with her, forever. What was it that she didn't understand? Meredith groaned in frustration and relaxed against her chair again.
"I don't know" she muttered quietly and looked down at the table. Derek slowly lifted his thumb to her chin and forced her to look at him
"Then what's wrong?" he said and tilted his head to the side just slightly. Meredith sighed.
"I don't know, I mean, nothing is wrong. Everything's great. But I still don't know what this means. I've never done this before.. I don't go around and kiss guys I barley know" she said with a frown.
"Then what do you want this to mean?"
"What? What I want this to mean? Well.. I.. I don't.." she paused and took a deep breath.
"I'm not sure, I've never done this before"
"The whole relationship thing?"
"Yeah" Meredith sighed and looked at him again.
"Well.. me neither, so I think we have to figure this out together." He said and took one of her hands.
"Really?" Meredith asked in surprise. Derek nodded his head slowly.
"Really.." They both slowly leaned in for a quick kiss but just as they were about to lock lips Derek felt his cell vibrate in his pocket and a second after that he heard the familiar ringtone. Derek picked it up and looked at the screen.
"Sorry, I have to get this" Derek said apologetically
"No, it's fine" Meredith said.
"Hey, man" Derek said and stood up.

Meredith studied him as he paced back and forth talking to someone on the phone. She didn't really care for what they were saying but whoever it was wanted to see Derek right away.
"Okay, tonight at seven.. yeah.. later" Derek sighed and shut the phone. Meredith waited as he sat down again. She looked at him expectantly.
"That was my cuisine, he lives here in Seattle"
"Oh, so you're meeting him tonight?"
"Yeah, his name's Jack. Maybe you know him..?" Meredith froze, she couldn't help it. She always did when she heard that name, his name. It just took a second before she could reply
"Well I know a couple of Jacks" But Derek still noticed something.
"Are you okay?" He asked with a worried frown on his face.
"Yeah, I'm fine, do you want to watch a movie or something?" Meredith said and stood up trying to avoid looking at him.
"Sure" Derek said staring of to space dumbfounded for a second. She changed so fast from wanting to talk and being open to just closing down. Did he do something wrong? He couldn't think or anything that would have pissed her of, but maybe he didn't notice it himself

After a couple of hours with Meredith being quiet and completely withdrawn Derek left. He still didn't know what he had done or what was going on he wondered why she didn't tell him anything, but she was right before. They barley knew each other. He wanted her to know that she could trust him he thought to himself. He sat in his room thinking until Jack showed up, he looked a lot like Derek and his dad but his features weren't as soft as theirs. His eyes were dark brown, black when he was mad. His hair was shorter than Derek had seen it in a long time and just above his left cheekbone he had a scar that was an inch long..
"Derek" he said. Not sternly or cold really, but still without any emotion attached. Derek just stood there, he had changed, Derek guessed that the nice popular guy that everyone loved and whom loved everyone was gone.
"Jack!" Derek's mother beamed happily and hugged him softly.
"Hello Jane" Jack forced a smile to his lips.
"How are you? Do you want anything to eat? Look at you, I can't believe it has been three years" Jane said and looked at him.
"No, I don't need anything. I'm good"
"Okay then" Jane said and looked between Derek and Jack for a moment before walking back towards the kitchen.
"Do you want to go up to my room?"
"Yeah" Jack said and walked towards the stairs pushing Derek just slightly. Derek didn't bother saying anything, he didn't want a fight so soon before school started again.
"You shouldn't be living in this neighborhood" Jack said as he stood by the window looking out.
"A certain girl from school live around here" he continued.
"And you like her?" Derek grinned. Jack laughed wryly
"Like? I'll be dead before I like that little whore" he said coldly.
"Oh" was all Derek could get out.
"Yeah, she's an ugly bitch, you'll see when school starts" Jack said with an evil laugh.
"Everyone despises her, even the freaks and the loners avoid her" he continued.
"It's good fun though, sometimes after school we drag her into a public bathroom and beat the shit out of her." Derek felt sick at his words, how could that be fun? And soon he would be one of them, on of Jacks closest friends. He had no idea though, just how sick he would feel when the girl's identity would be revealed to him…

To be continued ..

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- Anna