Author's Note: Sorry about the wait for this one. Also, it's still unbeta'd, so forgive any mistakes and feel free to point them out to me.
How Do You Make a Woman Believe She's Beautiful?
Chapter 4 – Do You Comfort Her?
"Here we are, Rose!" The Doctor bounces around the console to look at the screen. He frowns when he notices that there is no name listed for the planet they landed on. That was strange… But no matter; odder things have happened than a nameless location.
"And where is 'here'?" Rose pulls on her beanie and joins him in front of the door.
"It has no name! It's called 'the Unknown Planet'!" The Doctor frowned then, "that seems a bit redundant because I guess that's its name now... No matter." With that, he pushes open the door and reveals a dark, smoky sky and a ground dented with multiple crater-like impact marks. The Doctor frowns again, getting an odd vibe from the air. He sticks his tongue out and ignores the amused smile Rose gives him. "Tastes like…" He smacks his lips, "dust and antimatter particles." Rose cocks an eyebrow but doesn't question him. She knows better than to even bother asking how he found that out from sticking his tongue out like a child.
"Well that's great." She paused. "What does that mean?"
The Doctor reached for her hand and grinned, the two of them beginning their journey forward.
"It means that things are about to get interesting." He tugged her onward and she followed willingly.
They trudged on until they came upon a single farmhouse in the middle of a barren field. There were craters riddled on the ground and rubble covering everything. The foundation of some of the demolished buildings still stood; basements became gaping chasms in the ground. Toys, cans, and bits of cloth mingled amongst bits of rock and brick to make colorful piles of debris.
The two travelers looked about the morbid scene with a sense of resigned curiosity.
The Doctor tore his eyes from it and looked down to Rose. She was frowning. And since he hated to see her frown, he pulled her along to see if the planet had anything else to offer other them than sadness. A few planes flew overhead and the Doctor cast them a wary glance. Rose's fingers clutched tightly to his as if she had read his mind, and the pair made on walking.
A derelict farmhouse came into view and the Doctor walked onto the porch. Right as he moved toward the door, it swung open and a man in brown urged them with a wave of his arms.
"Ya two ref'gees?" The Doctor and Rose shared a look before nodding. They were ushered into a large gathering room where groups of people were huddled together. Women were sewing; men were gathering around drawing boards and shuffling papers like regular strategists, while children were playing with each other quietly.
The Doctor looked up to the sky from a window to the north and saw that the planes above them were just passing over them.
"I'm sorry… But what's with the planes?"
A few of the men turned to look at him, their faces haughty. Someone in the back snorted a laugh and covered it with a well placed cough.
"We're at war," someone piped in.
The Doctor nodded. Well that much was obvious. An idiot could see that with the decrepit landscape and old house full of refugees. "Alright… Then shouldn't the planes be attacking you?"
"Well they can't see us, obviously," a tall man said. He wore a heavy cloak in a taupe shade which had a brass clasp and his shirt beneath that was a starched white. He seemed to be in charge. The men behind him, presumably his soldiers, snickered amongst themselves before getting back to their papers.
"Yes, but why not?" The Doctor walked around, his sonic screwdriver out as he scanned the pieces of equipment lying about the room. He frowned before realization dawned on his features. "Oh! That's brilliant! A sentential cloaking device! It hides the house to those who mean it harm!" The Doctor turned to Rose, "Fantastic." He flashed a grin reminiscent of his previous regeneration and she stifled a laugh behind her hand.
A few of the men looked at him in awe and put down their documents in favor of watching what he would do next. The boss man, Mr. Cloak-and-obsessively-clean-shirt didn't lose his superior aura; instead he became even more arrogant looking.
"Oh, so we have an intelligent refugee?" Many of the people behind him recoiled in indignity, even a few of the soldiers.
"Ah, I'm not really a refugee." The soldiers picked up their guns and pointed them at him, thinking that he was about to declare himself a spy or something.
"Oi, put those things away. You could hurt someone." A handful of them lowered their weapons (the ones who looked at the Doctor like he was their hero), while the others merely steadied theirs.
"Then who are you?" Mr. Clean Shirt asked, stepping forward.
"I'm the Doctor." He reached out for Rose and she clasped her hand in his. "And this is Rose." The soldiers lowered their guns in favor of Rose. She snorted to herself - great, a group of sexist men who wouldn't point a weapon at a woman. Ah, well, she could use that in her favor.
"A doctor of what?"
"Oh, this and that. Ooh, this and that, this'n'that. I like the sound of that." Rose merely looked at him bemusedly while the room's other inhabitants gazed at him like he was a loon.
"Then can you help this boy? We ran out of supplies and he's hurt." A young looking soldier stepped forward, not heeding Mr. Clean Shirt's motions to stay back.
A small boy of about eight stepped forward and the Doctor knelt down to meet his eyes. "What's your name?"
"Eleazer, sir."
The Doctor smiled, "Ah, no 'sir', just 'Doctor'." Eleazer nodded. "Now, what's wrong with you, Eleazer?"
The boy put out his arm to reveal a deep looking cut peeking out from underneath a crude cloth bandage.
"Rose, hand me some sterile and gauze, please." Rose reached into her pockets (now transdimensional, just like the Doctor's) and pulled out a small first aid bag. She handed the whole bag to the Doctor and knelt next to him in front of Eleazer.
"Hello, sweetheart." She smiled at him and the boy smiled back, his pearly teeth shining against his tan, dusty face. There was a smudge of dirt on his cheek and Rose unthinkingly wiped it away with the pad of her thumb. "Where's your mum?"
"She's dead. So's my dad."
"Oh, I'm sorry." She gave him a sad, conspiratorial smile, "My dad's dead, too." Eleazer gave a small, shy smile filled with child-like understanding. Rose traded a look with the Doctor who had out a small knife. She saw the look in his eye: he wanted her to distract the boy. "So, Eleazer, how old are you?"
"I'm eight. I'll be nine in two weeks." He looked excited, his green eyes flashing. He didn't even notice the small incision the Doctor made to reopen the infected cut. Sterile was dabbed on it and a thick wad of gauze was taped to his thin arm.
"There you go, Eleazer. Be careful not to hurt yourself again." The Doctor mussed up the boy's blonde curls and smiled indulgently as the boy brushed his hand away. Rose watched the fatherly gesture with disguised curiosity. He'd said he'd been a father before… But this was the first time she'd seen him act fatherly.It was rather sweet and it warmed her, from the center of her heart to her toes. But she quelled that warmth because children were domestic and the Doctor would never want them, least of all with her.
The Doctor watched as Rose blinked quickly, her own hand settling on Eleazer's head. Her fingers knotted into the boy's locks and the child looked up at her, his nose wrinkled adorably. "Yes, miss?" The Doctor saw Rose smile at the boy's politeness.
"Call me Rose, sweetheart." The boy nodded and smiled; those shockingly white teeth once again on display.
"Okay, Rose." Another smile before Eleazer leaned in and gave her a quick hug around the middle, his features shy and unsure. Her heart warmed. Yes, children were usually right terrors, but this boy was the sweetest thing she'd ever seen.
Since her eyes were glued to the child, Rose completely missed the look of intense longing that crossed fleetingly over the Doctor's face.
As the Doctor went off with the soldiers, Rose mingled with the women and children. All the kids were oddly quiet and subdued; playing with their toys in near silence, their faces drawn. The women were all working hard at sewing and mending soldier's clothes. They too were quiet.
Rose watched the kids, Eleazer included. He seemed to be the most exuberant of the lot, talking with the other kids. A small frown creased his brow when none of his companions responded to him. He picked up a book and moved to approach her, his movements hesitant – like he was unsure if he was allowed to come to her.
"Rose?"
"Yes?" She saw him shifting from one foot to the other and smiled indulgently. The Doctor did the exact same thing when he was anxious to ask for something.
"Do you know how to read?" Rose nodded and Eleazer fidgeted with the edge of the book in his small hands. "Could you read to me?"
"Of course I can, sweetheart." Rose mussed up his hair and he laughed. She sat down on the ground and Eleazer plopped down next to her. As she started reading, he curled into her side.
The Doctor watched as one by one, the children left their toys to crowd around Rose as she read. Eleazer was half in her lap and a little girl had her head on Rose's shoulder, peering over to look at the page she was reading from. Even the women seemed to have slowed their sewing in favor of listening in. Rose's tone changed for each character, causing a few of the children to giggle.
"Your woman is learned?" Mr. Clean Shirt's tone was surprised and that set the Doctor's teeth on edge. It didn't matter how many places he goes, there is always one gender or race being undermined by another.
"She's brilliant."
The same young soldier who had asked the Doctor to help Eleazer stepped forward. "She is beautiful, too."
A muscle in his cheek twitched and he squinted. "So I've been told. Repeatedly."
"I'm Chaplin." The young soldier held out his hand and the Doctor shook it, noting the long and uncalloused fingers. Odd for a soldier. "Is the lady your wife?" Chaplin motioned to Rose with his soft hands.
The Doctor saw the way Chaplin looked at Rose, his eyes all soft and enraptured like she was a new star being born and not just a human woman. He found that he didn't like anyone but himself looking at her like that. And that's what prompted his response:
"Yes."
Chaplin actually looked surprised. "She has no ring."
"She, ah, lost it. We've been travelling about." The pause earned him a look of suspicion.
"You have no children?"
"No!" The Doctor spluttered, his hands moving from his pockets to rub at the back of his neck. "I mean, we haven't gotten to… it." Then he flushed, realizing what his wording implied. If he were to be married to her he would make sure to cause her pleasure. "I mean we've been travelling, like I said. It's not safe for Rose to be pregnant while we travel."
The words 'Rose' and 'pleasure' and 'pregnant' sent his mind astray. Yes, getting her pregnant would be quite pleasurable… She would look gorgeous, slightly rounded and even softer than she already is. Her breasts heavier…
Ooh, there was his wandering mind again. He wasn't actually married to her. His thoughts shouldn't stray there. Because there was a very nice place to be and he didn't deserve nice.
The day passed as well as it could in a war ravaged place. Horrid strategies were drawn up and the Doctor marveled at the impudence of this bunch of human men. They had attacks planned out for maximum kills of the other side and torture ideas for any prisoners who were to be captured. Seeing people like this, seeing humans like this made him wonder why he even likes their race. Then he looks over at Rose reading to the innocent children and he remembers why he finds humans amazing.
Night fell over them, the windows darkened and candles put up. Flickers of golden light danced across the crumbling plaster and metal walls.
Rose offered to tuck the children in. At least four children were holding her hands like little leeches. She merely smiled down at them and said she'd read them one last book before they fell asleep. They all murmured quiet, sleepy little thanks to her which caused her smile to widen. Eleazer clung possessively to her right hand, his eyes warding off any other the other children who dared approach that hand.
Each child had their own bed with a thin mattress and even thinner pillow. Rose bit her lip to quell tears as she watched each child hunker into their uncomfortable beds. She read on until she saw that each of their little chests were moving in even, slow rhythms and their eyes were closed. Her hand moved on its own accord, brushing back the closest child's hair. She settled a kiss on each of their foreheads before turning to leave the room.
Rose closed the door quietly and turned, jumping as she noticed she was being watched. One of the soldiers the Doctor had been talking to earlier was standing near her, his arms crossed as he leaned against the wall.
"You are very good with them." The soldier complimented her with a slight smile.
"I have cousins I watch over back home." Rose said, wiping her palms over the front of her jeans before stuffing them in her pockets. They stood there for a moment. "And you are…?"
"I am Chaplin, ma'am." She cocked an eyebrow at being called 'ma'am' but didn't mention it.
"Nice to meet ya, Chaplin." The soldier nodded and grinned a boyish, sideways sort of smile that would've made her heart stutter years ago. Another man's boyish smile gave her that feeling now. A man who she hadn't seen or heard from in over an hour… "Do you know where the Doctor is?"
"He's in your room." Rose once again cocked an eyebrow.
Their room? As in they were sharing? The Doctor didn't like sharing. Whenever he could, he'd request separate rooms. Then again, this was a war refuge. There probably weren't enough rooms for him to have his own.
Chaplin began to walk and Rose followed him. They came to a door at the end of the hall. "This will be your room." She nodded gratefully.
"G'night."
"Goodnight, ma'am." And Chaplin was off, back down the hall and into the main room.
Rose opened the door slowly, not wanting to wake the Doctor if he had decided to actually sleep for once.
He wasn't asleep; instead he was sprawled in a chair with his reading glasses on and a book in his hands. He looked up as she entered and gave her smile. "How're the kids?"
Rose wrinkled her nose. "My God, that sounds domestic."
The Doctor flushed a bit and coughed into his hand. Rose realized what she'd said and blushed, too. There was an awkward, quiet moment between them where they both were completely unsure of what to say next. They both wondered when things between them had become so… differentand uncomfortable.
"They're fine."
"Who?"
Rose gave him the look he used to give her in his previous regeneration, the you've-dribbled-down-your-shirt look. "The children. They're fine." She smiled and stepped closer, her fingers working at the zip of her hoodie. The garment slid off her arms and she cast it to the side, draping it over a high backed chair. "They love books, all of them. It's so sweet."
The Doctor nodded absently, looking for all the world that he was enraptured by his book. Instead, he was watching Rose out of the corner of his eye like some shy schoolboy who couldn't face his crush. As he took a moment to realize how childishand un-Time Lord-y he was being, he finally faced her. She was sitting on the bed and unlacing her shoelaces, her body hunched forward so that her hair fell over her shoulders in a golden curtain. The Doctor licked his lips absently and wondered what Rose would do if he just reached forward and pushed a few strands back.
Would she see his desire to do more in his eyes? Because she had this daunting ability to see right through him and it scared him at times.
Rose tugged absently at her shoelace and wondered why she'd tied it so tightly. She leaned forward more and completely missed the choked sound the Doctor made.
His eyes goggled just the slightest bit. The view was… wonderful, to say the least. The vintage scoop-necked t-shirt Rose was wearing slid down just the slightest but to show him even more of her breast than normal. Soft, pink-gold skin was on display and he found himself completely unable to look away. He watched avidly as she shucked off her shoes and stood to stretch. His eyes were still glued to her chest from behind his glasses which were slowly sliding down his nose. Young breasts jutted upwards as Rose moved her arms above her head and tilted slowly from one side to the other. Transfixed, he didn't even notice Rose's jeans were gone until he looked down and found her shimmying out of them.
"What are you doing?" The Doctor's voice was a higher pitch than normal as he watched her undress in front of him.
"I'm tired and I am not sleeping in my jeans." Rose narrowed her eyes. "Is that a problem?"
The Doctor cleared his throat and shook his head. "Just didn't expect you to… spontaneously disrobe."
Rose snorted and rolled her eyes affectionately. She skittered off into the washroom, not knowing that the Doctor's eyes were still glued to her.
The flash of more thigh then he normally saw made him swallow convulsively. Rassilon, he was acting like a mere human man! He was no better than the silly little boys he mocked for being led around by their hormones and bits. But Rose made him so human. It was actually kind of freeing. While things between them weren't simple, what he wanted from her was so simple and natural and human. Watching her and hugging her felt like breathing despite his people's views on such fanciful things as the need for touch and emotions. The memories of that repression just melted away when he was with her. Rose made him feel like wanting things like relationships and connections and closeness were alright and safe and good.
And right now what the Doctor wanted was her touch. He wanted warm, little human hands and soft curves. His fingers impulsively moved upwards as he tugged his tie lose and unbuttoned his suit jacket. He draped it the same chair where Rose had placed her jumper. He picked it up and brought it to his nose, breathing in the scent deeply. The clothing smelled a bit like spicy alien champagne which was odd but very inviting. The Doctor let a sigh escape his lips before he moved on with undressing. His shirt slid off his arms and he was left in a blue undershirt, his pinstriped trousers, and white shoes which he hastily unlaced and shoved under the chair. He debated for a moment whether or not to take off his trousers too, but decided against it. Feeling her bare legs against his would be too much.
Just as he began to slide into the surprisingly accommodating bed, Rose stepped out of the washroom. Her skin was free of makeup and pinked from warm water and soft scrubbing. For a moment he couldn't move, frozen in a crawl like a startled big cat.
"What are you doing?" Rose asked, her brow furrowing as she took in the sight of the Doctor slightly undressed and slipping into bed. He normally didn't bother removing clothing or even get into bed. He'd leave her to sleep whenever they shared a room.
"I'm actually feeling kind of tired. Thought I'd rest for a few hours."
'Liar',' his mind said. He just wanted to touch her. But how could he phrase that without it coming out awkwardly? How about: 'Um… Rose, would you mind me putting my grubby, undeserving hands all over you?'
No, that simply wouldn't do.
"Oh." Rose licked the inside of her lower lip and moved forward, determined to not make a fuss about sleeping with him. They'd done it before. Of course, that was back before he regenerated. She remembered how his previous body had felt next to hers, all cool and unyielding. Her mind wandered and she wondered how he felt now. Rose quickly diverted her thoughts, not letting them stray to places she so wantedto go.
So, she pulled up the covers and slid in next to him. Long moments passed, both of them stiff and on either side of the bed. It was as if a wall had been put up between them that neither was sure they were allowed to breach. Both wanted to open the door in that wall that led to the other, but shy hesitancy led them to delay from doing so.
Rose shifted and her hand accidentally brushed the Doctor's arm. "Sorry." Her voice was quiet.
"No." She frowned, unsure of what he meant by 'no'.
"Wha?"
"Come here." The Doctor reached for her, his arms open. Rose eyed him for a moment before sliding into his embrace. One of his arms draped over her waist and the other pillowed under her head. A human's arm would fall asleep after being in that position, but his nerves worked differently. He could quite comfortably hold her like that for hours. And that's what he wanted to do.
A quiet gasp escaped the Doctor when he felt something warm brush his arm just where it connected with his shoulder. He looked down and saw that Rose had nuzzled against that spot, her lips pressing against it. Her eyes met his, all dark cattish yellow, and his respiratory bypass system failed for what had to be the millionth time in her presence. A small smile fell over her lips and she relaxed against him, her eyes closed so all he could see were pale eyelids and thick, sooty lashes. His fingers moved to touch the place right next to her eye. He wondered why she bothered with all that mascara and other goopy stuff when she looked better without all of it. Her skin felt smooth under the pads of his fingers and he craved more of it.
But how to go about that?
The Doctor cupped her cheek and leaned forward the slightest bit. For a moment she thought he'd kiss her, and he did. Just not where she wanted to be kissed. His lips pressed softly to her temple and she could feel his exhalations against her skin, ruffling the hair just near her forehead.
They both fell asleep around the same time, their bodies moving even closer to each other during their rest.
When the Doctor woke Rose was still asleep. Her back was nestled against his chest along with the curve of her bum pressed right into his front. He breathed in slowly, tamping down on the reaction he knew would soon become very noticeable. Thankfully, despite Rose making him feel human, he wasn't. By forcing his body temperature to lower, blood flow slowed and that got rid of his problem.
He was about to move his hand and stretch, when he noticed exactly where it was placed. The stiff peak of Rose's nipple was nudging against his palm. His fingers were spread over her right breast in a possessive grasp. He could quite literally feel the softness of her through the thin material of her shirt. Leaning in a listening to her even breaths, he determined that she was deep in sleep. He flexed his fingers, feeling the suppleness of her breast. Rose groaned quietly and the Doctor's hand shot away from her chest. He hid it behind his back like a guilty child who stole a sweet before supper. Then she burrowed closer to him, rubbing her bum right up against him. The Doctor hissed under his breath.
Even in sleep she knew how to get back at him.
The Doctor was no longer tired, but he didn't want to move. He wanted to stay there, right next to Rose and touch her freely while he had the chance. So he did. He hesitantly wrapped his arm back around her, this time below her breasts, and cuddled close to her. Rose hummed in her sleep and rolled over, seeming to sense his need to see her as well as touch her. Her face was peaceful and her hair was a bit of a mess around her, but he found that he loved the mess.
It endeared her to him.
A man came running in, sweat dripping from his hair and finding its way into his eyes. He blinked rapidly.
"Sir! News!" Mr. Clean Shirt stepped forward, not making a move to assist the man. Chaplin did, though. He brought a wet towel and a glass of water to the man. The man took them both gratefully and downed the water in one, monstrous gulp. He buried his face in the towel before standing up straight and saluting to Mr. Clean Shirt.
"Sir, our informant has told me that the others plan to attack!"
And suddenly the whole room was a flurry. Papers were thrown about, orders were given, and the women gathered the children up. Rose stood up quickly, her eyes darting to the Doctor, unsure of what to do. They shared a look that could only be described by an outsider as reluctant excitement. They thrived on this kind of chaos.
Mr. Clean Shirt huddled in with his soldiers while Chaplin broke free from the group. He kneeled down next to the children and Rose. "You need to go through the tunnels." He helped Rose up with a slow smile and the Doctor fisted his hands tightly.
Chaplin urged the children up along with the women. They trailed down a set of stairs that presumably led to the tunnels. Rose, whose hand was still held hostage by Chaplin's, tugged away firmly.
"I'm staying with the Doctor."
"Your husband?" Chaplin asked, his voice calmly inquiring.
"My-," Rose turned to look at the Doctor and saw that his eyes were wide and urging, "Yes… he's my husband." The Doctor swallowed at the faint look on Rose's face, like she couldn't quite believe he'd said they were married. He didn't blame her. He usually discouraged such attachments, even if they were pseudo ones.
Chaplin nodded, looking a bit crestfallen.
Eleazer came running from the line up of children. He clutched onto Rose's legs, his chin jutting against her hip. "I don't want to leave you." Rose knelt down next to the boy who had tears in his green eyes. She gently used her thumb to catch the salty drops of water on his thick, flaxen lashes. "All the other kids have their mums with them." Eleazer's gaze became shy. Rose bit her lip a little, her eyes darting to the Doctor's before meeting Eleazer's once more.
"You can stay with me if you'd like." The boy nodded furiously and kissed her cheek bashfully. Rose smiled and picked him up and let him perch on her hip. She made her way over to the Doctor who looked like he was ready to try and escape. Her hand found his, leaving him incapable of swanning off. "We're married?" She asked, her eyebrow quirked.
The Doctor cleared his throat and nodded. "I had to make sure they gave us one room together. Some of the soldiers are a bit… shifty." 'Chaplin', his mind noted. Although the shifty soldiers weren't his real reason for saying they were married, it was a good enough excuse to tell Rose. He didn't want her to know that he was jealous and wanted her to himself. He'd tell her that someday; now was not the time.
The Doctor absently wondered when that time would be.
The women and children were all evacuated to a bomb shelter miles away and underground.
The soldiers were all a rattled mess, moving from one table to the next, adjusting weapons and what not. The Doctor stood off to the side, unwilling to be a part of the murdering that was to come. And for all he knew these 'Others' as the soldiers had put it were innocent teddy bears or mutated children or whatever. Far be it from him to kill mutated children and fluffy, cuddly creatures.
Eleazer was currently clutching at a book, his brow furrowed as he mouthed the words before him. The Doctor found himself wondering what it would be like to have a child around to teach and guide. And Rose… Rose would be a wonderful mum.
He shook his head. He shouldn't be thinking things like that, especially now.
Rose was about, staying out of the soldiers' way while surreptitiously gathering information like a professional. Chaplin was following her as she moved around the room, his face like that of an eager puppy following its master.
The Doctor felt a bit of sneer tug at his lip before he realized, with noted horror, that he was the exact same way. Wherever Rose went, he went. He'd follow that human girl to the ends of the universe and back a thousand times over. She practically held him on a leash. But the great thing about Rose was that she never took advantage of the fact that she had one of the most powerful beings in the universe ready to bend to her every whim.
The Doctor was jarred from his thoughts as Eleazer walked up to him and tugged on his coat, a very serious little frown gracing his face. "Yes?" The Doctor arched an eyebrow at the boy who was pushing his curly hair out of his eyes with a slightly pudgy, childish hand.
"Can I go down and play?" He nodded and the boy began to dart off. His hand caught Eleazer's bony shoulder.
"Be careful, okay?" The boy nodded, his jade eyes bright before he scampered off.
The room fell to a dull hum and the Doctor noticed Rose making her way to him. She'd somehow shaken off Chaplin and wore a slightly mysterious Mona Lisa-esque smile on her lips.
"Chaplin doesn't seem to understand that I'm a married woman." Rose paused, "Why exactly are we married?"
He sniffed and rubbed his jaw. "We were reallydrunk." Rose hit his arm and rolled her eyes.
"No, really. Why?" She looked up at him with large imploring eyes and his mind was screaming at him. Half was saying, 'danger, danger!', while the other half said, 'here's a chance. Take it, imbecile.'
His mind and mouth couldn't seem to agree with each other at all, because he said, "Like I said, some of the soldiers seem shifty. I just wanted you to be safe."
Rose nodded, but he could see the disappointment in her eyes. It made him dislike himself a little more than he already did. The Doctor wondered why he couldn't just say the important things that popped into his head. He'd blurt about particle physics; never the stuff that needed to be said, or the things she deserved to hear.
"We should probably get out of here soon," Rose looked confused and he went on, "There's nothing I can do to help these people." The Doctor hated telling her that, but sometimes it was true. Sometimes there truly was nothing he could do to aid people even if they deserved it. He didn't even know the name of the planet they were on, let alone its history. Lest he bring on Reapers, they had to back out soon.
Rose looked resigned. "Alright. Just… Just let me say goodbye to Eleazer?" She bit her lower lip and looked up at him and he found himself nodding dumbly, unsure of what she'd even said.
The deafening sound of metal crunching against rock had the Doctor yanking Rose back to him, holding her closely, his chin over her head and his hands protecting the back of her skull. He could feel the land beneath his feet shaking; hear the soldiers screaming orders and rock falling.
When it felt like things had settled, he pulled back, his hands still firmly behind Rose's head. She looked up at him, panicked. His eyes roved over her restlessly, not even acknowledging the chaos and terror going on around them.
"I'm fine," She said, her voice louder than normal. That was normal; her hearing was probably smarting from the loud sounds.
The Doctor nodded, but startled when Rose suddenly wrenched from his grasp.
"Eleazer!" She ran down the steps to the tunnel and he tore after her, knowing that the ground was highly unstable.
He saw where the tunnel had collapsed about three meters in and looked down to see Rose was on her knees, dislodging rocks and flinging them behind her. For a moment he was unsure of what to do; he felt helpless. Then, as he saw her body shaking, he moved behind her and put his hands on her shoulders, trying to still her.
"Rose…" She bowed her head further, her hands still picking at the rocks. The Doctor could see where her palms were already beginning to scratch up from the sharp edges of the rocks. And, seeing as she had no intention stopping, he began to help her. He didn't voice his thoughts of how the search was pointless. There was no way Eleazer was going to make it through that.
"Oi, can we have some help here?" The Doctor called up to the soldiers and a few joined them, Chaplin included. They each wore a grim look on their face, all of them knowing that there was no way Eleazer was going to make it. Blessedly, none of them uttered a word of their thoughts and began to help move rocks.
One man gasped quietly and the Doctor looked over to see him uncovering a very injured arm. The man looked to the Doctor, unsure if he wanted his 'wife' to see the boy in such a state.
The Doctor nodded and gently touched Rose's shoulder. She looked at him and he motioned towards the arm.
Rose moved towards the arm, clasping the hand in hers briefly, before beginning to carefully remove rocks from the top of the pile. The soldiers followed suit, working quietly and efficiently beside her.
It took what felt like hours for them to safely move the rubble so they could free Eleazer's body. When the little boy was liberated, Rose fell back to her knees and hovered her cheek over his mouth to see if he was breathing.
Bright green eyes opened sluggishly, shocking everyone, and the Doctor could see Rose stifling a sob.
"Hello, sweetie." She brushed back his blood-matted curls and moved him into her lap. The boy closed his eyes again, seeming content where he was. The Doctor understood quite well how comfortable it was to be held by Rose Tyler.
"Hurts." Eleazer's voice was hoarse and Rose bit her lip, blinking heavily, and looked up at the ceiling, seemingly asking the gods why.
"I know it does, sweetheart. But you're doing an amazing job." She leaned down and kissed his forehead, breathing him in, not caring that he smelled of little boy sweat and blood. Underneath all that lingered innocence and the scent of child. Rose hummed quietly and stroked her thumb over his cheekbone.
Eleazer muttered something and Rose pulled back so she could hear him better.
"Aingeal."
The Doctor sucked in a breath through his teeth and looked away from his companion. He could hear the beating of Eleazer's heart slow and see his timeline ending right before his eyes.
"Oh, sweet boy." Rose pressed one last kiss to Eleazer's face before standing shakily. The Doctor moved behind her to steady her and he could feel the tenseness that was right beneath her skin. "Can we go home?" She looked at him with blank, tired eyes and he nodded, leading her up the stairs, past the scrambling soldiers, and onto the fields.
They walked and by the time they reached the TARDIS it was dark and cold.
The Doctor shifted from one foot to the other as he leaned on the console. The Old Girl was droning tunelessly as he flitted about, wondering what to do.
Rose had walked into the TARDIS and left without a word. He hadn't followed and now he wondered if that had been a mistake.
The Doctor heard a noise and looked up to see Rose standing in the doorway wearing a large t-shirt, fuzzy socks, and her hair up in a messy ponytail. Her face was bare without makeup, her eye clogged with tears. She looked so small and vulnerable. He was unsure of what to do.
Did he deserve to comfort her?
He was, after all, the one who sent Eleazer down into the tunnels to play while there was a war going on. If he hadn't done that Rose would be playing around with a smiling little boy and reading him stories.
"I'm so sorry, Rose." Her lip trembled and she brought her hand to her mouth to stop the sobbing. The Doctor stepped closer and enfolded her in his arms. She trembled and clutched at the back of his suit, pulling the material tightly.
"He was just a boy!" She sobbed, "Just a beautiful little boy!"
And the Doctor agreed with her.
And, he wanted to tell her that he finds her to be so beautiful because she's so empathetic. It just makes her all the more attractive to him, the fact that she's so human.
But he couldn't seem to form the words, so he just held her tightly and pressed kisses to her temple as she cried her single human heart out over the little boy she'd came to love.