Chapter 4: Pre-Gaming
"Shit Kirito-kun, this guy's a dick, huh?" With a thump Johnny dropped into the seat next to Kirito and the hooded girl, who were sitting next to each other. He motioned to the Cactus-head looking man ranting in the middle of the theater.
Kirito-kun glanced at him while the hooded girl shrunk away from him slightly, though not as much as he would have expected considering what he had done to her. "Yeah, I'd say so JB," Kirito-kun mumbled. "But he has a point… the beta testers abandoned those trapped in the game, left them to their own devices."
Johnny rolled his eyes. He knew Kirito-kun was referring to himself. As a beta tester, the slightly older teen was probably beating himself up over not doing more to help out. Johnny didn't really get why Kirito-kun cared and said as much.
"You wouldn't understand because you're a psychopath, you little brat," the hooded girl muttered, a hint of annoyance in her voice. Johnny glanced at her.
"I would've thought she wouldn't like being near me, but she seems okay with me being here. She does know that I'm the guy who attacked her yesterday, right?" Johnny commented, a hint of confusion in his voice.
The hooded girl sighed in annoyance. "You're a pervert, but your friend says you're a good fighter. If you're willing to help clear the game, I won't out you. Not at the boss meetings. I'll still kick your ass if I see you outside of one though."
Johnny scratched his head in a mock thinking motion. "But I thought I was the one who kicked your ass last time? I seem to remember my boot planting itself on the seat of those cute white panties of yours. You made such a lovely squeak…" Johnny was cut off as the hooded girl drew her rapier and rammed it into his chest, knocking him down the stairs of the theater they were gathered in.
"Fuck you!" she shouted after him as he bounced down the stairs. Johnny rolled to his feet at the bottom and flipped her off.
"Bitch!" he shot back. It didn't hurt as they were inside a safe zone, but rolling down a flight of stairs wasn't exactly a fun time. You still felt all the bumps. Turning to Cactus-head, who had been ranting on the entire time, he nodded cheerily. "Sorry about interrupting whatever bullshit you were going on about. Please, continue."
With that, Johnny began to walk back up the stairs. A hand on his shoulder stopped him. "Bullshit? You think what I'm saying is bullshit? The beta testers abandoned us! But if you're defending them, I bet you're one of them! You are, aren't you?" Cactus-head yelled, spittle flying.
"Eh?" Johnny turned around to face Cactus-head. "What's got you so pissed?"
Cactus-head glared at the young teen. "Like I said, the beta testers left us for dead! They hoarded the good drops, and let us stumble about helplessly, with no idea where the best loot was!"
Johnny blinked. "And? Sounds like a FromSoft game, really. Why don't you just…" Johnny spread his arms wide open condescendingly. "Git. Gud?"
Cactus-head's fist slammed into Johnny's face sending the young teen stumbling to the ground. "You think it's a joke? People have died!"
"Why you have to be mad? Is only game." Johnny's cheeky comments (Made in an annoyingly bad Russian accent) didn't seem to be doing a great job of calming Cactus-head down. Not that they were intended to—quite the opposite in fact. But before Cactus-head could attempt—uselessly, it must be said—to assault Johnny again, the blue-haired 'knight' intervened, dragging Cactus-head back and shoving him to the ground.
"Both of you, calm down!" she shook her head tiredly. "Honestly, I'm surrounded by children!"
Cactus-head glared at the blue-haired 'knight.' "Keep out of this, Diavel!" he roared angrily.
"I'm basically a child, what's his excuse?" Johnny said, pointing at Cactus-head.
Cactus-head gave Johnny the middle finger. Johnny stuck his tongue out. Diavel, the blue-haired woman, sighed. "Please. Can we not work together towards a common cause?"
"No! He's an asshole!" Johnny yelled.
"I refuse to work with someone who would defend the beta testers!" Cactus-head shouted at the same time.
Both players glared at each other.
"If I may?" A massive black man rose to his feet and stepped forward. "While I wouldn't have put it in the same way that this young man did," here the man pointed towards Johnny, "he has a point of sorts." From his pocket the man pulled a book. "This is the Aincrad Guidebook, written by beta testers and distributed to all players within the first day. It has much vital information inside it, and I've no doubt it saved countless lives. Those who have died so far have died because of their own mistakes, not because of the actions of the beta testers."
"Yeah, 'cause th-urk!" Johnny was cut off by Kirito grabbing him by his collar and hauling him back up the stairs.
"Sorry about him," Kirito apologized. "He's under quite a lot of pressure, as you can understand."
Diavel nodded in understanding, spreading her arms wide and smiling at the assembled players. "Of course. We all are. Some tensions are to be expected. But as the gentleman said, the beta testers do not deserve our hatred. They were scared, just as we were. I only hope that we can put aside our animosity; let us direct it towards the true enemy—Kayaba and his twisted game!"
The crowd cheered loudly, clearly invigorated by Diavel's words. Diavel turned a sharp glare onto Cactus-head who sighed and turned towards the other assembled players. "Fine. I suppose I can put my trust in the beta testers, just this once. But if any of you fail in your duties, I will hold you responsible!" So saying, he stomped back to the stands and sat down.
Most of the assembled players nodded in agreement as that sounded reasonable enough. Johnny, being the belligerent child he was made to open his mouth but was stopped by Kirito slapping a hand over his mouth. Johnny glared at Kirito out of the corner and tried to struggle free to no avail. The older teen had clearly leveled ⸢Strength⸥ more than Johnny had. After a few seconds of pointlessly flailing about, Johnny narrowed his eyes. Opening his mouth, he ran his tongue slowly along Kirito's hand.
Johnny could feel the older teen shiver as he did so. Quickly the hand was removed from his mouth and he was tossed into a seat next to the hooded girl.
"God, fuck, JB! Don't do that!" Kirio yelped, wiping his hand on his pants. Saliva itself wasn't rendered in the game for processing reasons but the feeling of wetness still existed.
A cheeky grin spread across Johnny's face. "What's the matter, Kirito-kun? Afraid you'll like it?"
Shaking his head tiredly, Kirito groaned and looked up at the blue skies above. "You were so much easier to deal with before you hit puberty, you know?"
"Meh." Johnny shrugged. "But I was less interesting, wasn't I?"
The hooded girl turned her gaze towards him. "If this is you being interesting, I must say I would prefer you were boring."
"What, like your choice in underwear? Honestly, white is just so boring. You've the same taste as my mum! Your panties are straight out of a classic anime!" Johnny complained.
"Well it's not like that's my choice, is it? There's not any good place to buy clothes on the first floor, if I even had the ⸢Col⸥ to spare!" the hooded girl shot back.
"Then what kind of panties would you wear?" Johnny questioned.
Caught up in the moment and taken off guard, the girl answered, much to Johnny's surprise. "Well, white probably, but typically not so plain. Usually with lace. Definitely a bikini cut, rather than…" the girl cut herself off, realizing what she was saying. Though they couldn't see her entire face, the part that was visible at the moment was flushed tomato red and she waved her hands, flustered. "Both of you forget I said that!"
Kirito was blushing almost as much as she was. For his part, Johnny just looked her over. "Yeah, I suppose that would be more fitting for your character type. It adds a bit of maturity, while still maintaining an air of innocence and purity."
Anything more that Johnny was planning on saying was cut off as a rapier planted itself beneath his neck. "Tell anyone what I said and I'll slit your throat!" the hooded girl growled in a low voice.
"Fine, fine," Johnny aquiested, grumbling. Then he perked up. "I'll just show them instead."
The hooded girl pressed her rapier harder against his neck. "You can try, pervert."
"I think I did?" Johnny tilted his head as if thinking. "Ah yes. I believe it ended with you on your knees. In your underwear. With my foot planted up your cute panty-clad ass."
The girl sighed and removed her rapier from Johnny's throat. "Whatever, I'll just beat the shit out of you some other time."
"It's a date!" Johnny cheered. Then his expression turned more serious. Kirito noticed and looked over.
"What is it, JB?"
"Well, it's just that I was wondering…" Johnny paused. "Where'd everyone go?"
All three of them looked around. True to Johnny's words the assembled players had scattered to the wind. Only a few stragglers were still hanging around, two of whom were making their way towards them.
One of the pair was a red-haired player, perhaps in her late teens or so. Johnny pegged her for eighteen or nineteen. The other was a brunette, about the same age as the red-haired player, though she seemed very nervous. The red-haired young woman nodded at them, a cheerful smile on her face.
"Heya, I'm Payton. My friend is Koharu." The girl motioned to the brunette who waved nervously at Johnny and the others. "Everyone else grouped up and left to go about their business, and you three happened to be the only ones left. So I was wondering if you'd allow us to join your party for the raid."
Johnny glanced at Kirito. "Whaddaya think, Kirito-kun?"
Kirito looked the two players over. "Do either of you have much experience with games like SAO?"
Payton bobbed her head. "Sure do! Been playing since I was a kid… though I'm more a fan of FPS games—CS:GO and the like. Still, this isn't my first rodeo. Koharu though… she's new to this kind of stuff."
"That sounds fine, right JB?" Kirito glanced at Johnny.
Johnny shrugged. More girls in the party was always fine. "Sure, sure. Just make sure you keep an eye on your friend because I'm not going to," he declared, pointing towards Payton who scowled at him in annoyance.
"JB!" Kirito groaned in exasperation. "Sorry, he's not trying to be confrontational, it's just that whenever JB fights a boss he tends to tunnel vision hard. So if you're in danger but aren't right in front of him he probably won't notice you. Don't take it personally, he's always been that way."
Payton nodded in understanding, her scowl morphing into a sheepish grin. "Yeah, I do that too sometimes. I don't think I'm as bad, but my friends don't let me play healers anymore. Last time I tried, I completely forgot to cast many heals and just focused damage. By the time they managed to remind me to use something other than my damage skills, half the party was wiped. They were real pissed at me."
"Eh, that's just how a lot of us hardcore gamers are. All offence, no defence," Kirito said with a laugh, clasping Payton's hand in his. "Welcome to the party." After a few seconds, Kirito rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment. "When's the raid anyways? I was so not paying attention."
So...Been a while, right? I've been in Oregon. Caught a fish. That's nice. This chapter sees the introduction Cactus-head, Female Diavel (Because I felt like making Diavel a woman), and Protagonist-chan (Payton) and Koharu from SAO: Integral Factor. Awful game, Integral Factor. Just a cash grab that makes you pay for everything and has awful drop rates. Play Fire Emblem Heroes or Fate/Grand Order, they're much better mobage games. FEH's got good drop rates and generous orb (The things used to summon) giveaways, and F/GO's got a really solid story and roster of characters, as well as being fairly Free-to-play friendly, though you will need to grind a bit.
Anyways, I'll probably finish up the boss fight chapter soon, so expect that either tomorrow or the day after. It really depends. Cheers.