A/N: Damn Tank! Just damn, who knew you had some smarts? 1 word: Enjoy!
Mercedes POV
"Mommy dinner was delicious."
"Yes it was no one does a spread like you baked chicken, greens, mashed potatoes, broccoli, and biscuits and for dessert chocolate cake I'm surprised that none of the New Directions along with your brother and sister joined us for dinner tonight. Finished with your dessert TJ?" TJ picked up his plate licking it clean. "I take that as you are now."
"Yup! Now I am. I'm stuffed."
"Only reason that they weren't here is because we banned them from tonight's dinner with a warning if they showed up we're going to take their key. Won't be effective though they all made copies." Sam looked at his watch it was 9 o'clock 15 minutes passed TJ's bedtime. "Bed time for Bonzo want to clean up the table and dishes now or after we put TJ to bed."
"Slightly bummed by that, that was one of the highlights when I used to visit up at the old house never knew who was going to show up leave the dishes to Puck and I we got this. I know you and Sam need to discuss about the G-R-E-M-L-I-N."
"We do TJ say good night to uncle Puck and Lucky you'll see them in the morning, Luck don't get too discouraged you'll see them around 7 in the morning when we open up for breakfast but we still be in bed."
"...tomorrow I'll explain to you why I gave aunt Stacey my crayons because some folk may not get it. Night guys I'm going to brush my teeth mommy tonight's bedtime story I want to hear is Don's Boat and Poor Pussy."
Lucky nearly dropped the dishes when he heard him say that. "Poor Pussy tell me that's not a legit children's book? If so I'm going to find my elementary school librarian to ask why she never recommended me that book sounds like a great read after you finish reading the book hand it off to me."
"Nah me first I got dibs on on it he my nephew no you can read it after I do. Get to busting suds. Go."
"Find that book and destroy it no child of mine will reading about Poor Pussy reminds me of that other nasty book you read to him, Do You Want to Play with My Balls."
"Honey that book was innocent."
"You got to be kidding me, innocent? Listen to this line, "Wow! Your balls are so big I can't even fit them in my mouth. Tell me of the innocence. You laughing because you know there isn't one. You stay out here to get yourself together once you calmed down join us."
Sam slid down the wall holding his stomach. "Okay. You know that mean girl Sally she squeezed my balls so hard they looked funny. Yeah well when I play with Sally I always end up with blue balls. Billy Jackson made Sally cry last week now that kids got balls. Not anymore...yesterday Sally kicked Billy's balls so hard he lost one. Look Louie! Your dog is licking my balls. Let's roll them on Sparky's fur. Girls hate hairy balls."
"What is wrong with daddy? Did you tickle his funny bone? He's losing it! Like he lost it Saturday night. You must have really tickled him good."
"No daddy did that to himself, teeth brushed, face washed, the book in bed you too Conniehey nice of daddy to join us we're going to say prayers then we'll read the story." We held hands and said our prayers. "In Jesus name amen all snuggled in tonight's reading is Don's Boat, take it away daddy."
"Okay "Let's go Ben," said Jen. "Don wants to show us his big boat at the lake." "Is this the boat, Don?" asked Ben. "Yes. We must blow it up," said Don. "It's hard, but I know we can do it." "Ben and I can help," said Jen. "Yes," said Ben. "We can help blow up the boat." "See," said Don. "When we row, we can make the boat go fast or slow." "It's your turn , Ben," gasped Jen. "This is hard," panted Ben. "Take it, Jen." "Not yet, please," moaned Jen. "We did it!" boasted Don. "It floats! Do you want a boat ride?" "Yes! Yes!" yelled Jen and Ben. "We can take turns rowing," said Don. Take turns?" groaned Jen and Ben. "Not that!" The end. Night TJ."
"Night my baby boy, sweet dreams." I kissed his cheek. "Leave his nightlight on leave his door open. Sam throw that book out too. Now that TJ's asleep we can talk about this new development Tank got the nerve to have half a brain to do this he's legally going through the courts there is a possibility he can take our son." I removed my shirt tossing it on the bed. "What if he wins?! Oh good lord my heart!"
"See Cedes." Sam took my hand and sat me on his lap rubbing my belly. "Don't go jumping to conclusions we're going to take this one step at a time." He raised my chin to look at him. "We have 30 days to file we're going to get our lawyers to look over the paper work and we'll go from there strategic planning. We aren't paying attention to that 5/4 word sentence counting fool." I laid my head on his shoulder. "He said, don't keep me waiting who are you? Who is he? He's a nobody that is trying to be a somebody. Sometimes baby I think back to when your brother and I beat his cousin up I'll never get that opportunity again."
"Got that right savor the memory. I'm just kinda scared he's going through the courts and all. I think we should tell our parents tomorrow on Google Hangouts."
"I agree we should get some sleep I'll help you out of that." He kissed me gently on the neck removing my bra. "Hey Mrs. Evans I love you."
"You too, may want to get him down tonight I have a headache."
Tank's POV
After dropping a bomb on Mercedes I sat there in same spot for a good 20 minutes staring into space smiling. "Bunny why is this boy in here smiling to himself Tank what are you so happy about?"
"What you mean what I'm smiling about unc. Yo! I can see all of their faces right now shocked that I know a little something, something about the court paternity game. This isn't my first time around the block but my first time being on the opposite side of the street."
"Oh well if that's the reason you smiling nephew then smile on thought you stumbled across my secret stash." He forever mentioning that damn stash whenever he gets the urge to puff puff pass he's gonna be so out of luck smoked that last night. "It's a first time for everything I didn't even know the both of y'all had broken up. How long were y'all together?"
"Let me do the math." I dug my phone out my pocket. "TJ is like 5 or 6, Mercedes is like 30 years old I think so carry the six, times pi I say 6 years. She was the love of my life thought we were gonna last forever but people change over time."
"True people do change over time tell me how y'all broke up, Bunny bring me a beer you want one too." I nodded my head. "Bunny make that four go ahead you were about to tell me how y'all broke up."
"Well one day she came to me saying she was leaving taking TJ with her and there was nothing I could do about it woke up the next morning they were gone."
"Man." He scoffed. "Let Bunny say she going to leave my ass hell I'd knock her right the hell out you don't tell me what you are going to do I tell you. Should have put her in place. Thought I taught you. Thank you baby put them right there. Yeah uh-huh see that bruise under your aunts eye gave her that almost 10 years ago kept that ass in line. When y'all break up? Did she attend your mother's funeral?"
"Over this summer early or late June that's when we split she came to the funeral thinking it was the wake then left early saying when she saw me old feelings started to come back she couldn't handle the pressure seeing me. So what is our next move?"
"Our next move is to wait for them she has 30 days to file her own claim we should be expecting to see that come across the doorstep in the coming days let's go in thinking as of right now from the jump that she's going to deny you having custody of TJ but agrees to the DNA testing that's should come out 99.99% you are the father which automatically gives you visitation rights. Don't get your hopes up she's going to fight it every way she can but a few judges owe me favors so uncle got this they not gonna know what hit them. Also that other thing Mercedes and Sam hit you with I got that removed now just because you are free to roam about near them don't go making a damn fool of yourself. If you see them out keep your distance be smart not dumb."
Next morning...
TJ's POV
During last nights dinner Lucky agreed to meet me in the game room for early morning gaming session it was already five minutes before 7. "You're late we agreed to meet 10 minutes ago."
"Sorry TJ I was up late talking to the fellas about Ta...just with the guys. I'm here now so what game we playing?" He asked plopping on the couch. " Something is off about this shouldn't your Uncle Stevie be knocked out on this couch."
"He was you missed him he has to get home to get ready for work. The game we're playing is LEGO Marvel's Avengers daddy bought this game for me but mommy said he bought him for himself. I'm Captain America classic you can pick whoever." Like clockwork seven o'clock on the dot I heard the jingling of keys. "GOOD MORNING AUNT QUINN HOW WAS YOUR MORNING JOG?!"
"FINE BABY THANK YOU FOR ASKING. TJ WHERE DID YOUR MOTHER PUT MY PROTEIN POWDER? NEVERMIND FOUND IT! Morning Conniehey. All the bullshit's for the birds, you ain't nothin' but a vulture always hopin' for the worst, waiting for me to fuck up, you'll regret the day when I find another guy, yeah who knows just what I need, he knows just what I mean..."
"Every morning since we moved in." Lucky shook his head in disbelief. "You not collecting the legos I need to give you activate the magnetic for you got me doing all the hard work running around."
"TJ who are you in here talking to- Lucky good morning, what brings you down here?
Is Puck here too? How long are y'all staying?"
"Yeah he's here just visiting. How long we're staying? Beats me you gonna stick around and watch us play?"
"Sure! I don't have to be at work until noon. Lucky you're suppose to hi that button so that can open up and a bunch of legos fly out." After aunt Quinn arrived she was followed by uncle Artie, then uncle JJ and aunt Stacey, you know everyone was at the house by 9. "So here comes TJ running outside with a box of crayons for Stacey, Thaddeus explain to us why you gave your auntie a box of 120 crayola crayons?"
"Well there are 2 ways mommy sends me off to do my own thing. When the grown folk talk if you all are talking about something funny that I shouldn't be hearing you all tell us to run off and play when it's something serious and out my league you tell me to go color or read a book, play a video game, or watch TV. Aunt Stacey what you were talking about was way out of your league and mine so you needed crayons Grandma Mary wouldn't like to know that he ate it out of you." Uncle JJ nearly spit out his juice he began coughing. "Uncle JJ you need to be more careful drink a little and just swallow FB."
"FB?" Everyone questioned. "Facebook?"
"No Fuzz butt!" I fell out on the floor laughing. "Aunt Stacey calls uncle JJ fuzz butt that's his pet name."
"Thaddeus, go off and play."
"See what did I tell you something funny we shouldn't be hearing come on my 3 musketeers and Jazzy going to show you the new commands Conniehey knows in Spanish! Ven Conniehey!"
Outro: Oh they scheming.