Hi!
I am so sorry for the time this took me!
I hope you at least like it! :)
(I don't own Nick or Jeff)
Trigger Warning: suicide ideas (if you're not comfortable with this tell me through my ask box on tumblr (samanthaintumbland. tumblr. com /ask (no spaces)) and I'll find a solution.)
Jeff woke up shuddering with cold. His whole body was aching so he didn't dare to move. Jeff opened his eyes slowly, his senses coming back slowly too.
He felt a cold breeze coming from the side and he tried to understand what it could be, he didn't want to turn his head he just closed his eyes again trying to keep breathing even if it hurt.
A memory flashed behind Jeff's closed eyes and before Jeff knew he was screaming, not because of the pain, but because of the memory. Images of the previous night were playing on Jeff's mind and he just wanted those images to go away. He also started to get sick as the images never stopped appearing on his mind.
He was curled in a ball screaming, his whole body seemed to be on fire and still the images weren't stopping.
He felt a hand on his shoulder probably supposed to calm him down, he also could hear someone talk faintly in his ear but his screams were too loud.
He felt a great hit on the back of his head and suddenly the pain was gone again.
The first thing Jeff saw when he woke up again was Nick sat on an armchair staring at the floor completely frozen and with a wooden stick in his right hand. Jeff thought he was dead, he thought he had stabbed himself somewhere, he just couldn't understand where.
It was still (or already) night out there, Jeff knew it because the window was open, and that must have been the cause of the cold air earlier.
After a while Jeff noticed he wasn't in pain, so he wondered for how long he had been asleep. He gathered the courage to look at his own body, remembering how his neck had been when Nick bit him. But he was taken by surprise when he looked at himself and he wasn't only shirtless but his torso was covered with a white bandage. Did Nick do that? Of course he did. There was nobody else in that house.
Jeff drove a hand to one of the places he knew Nick had bit him, he whined as he touched it through the bandage and he felt that part of skin burning.
Nick's head shot up. "You're alive…" He mumbled.
Jeff tried to sit up and whimpered as he felt pain. It had been too good not feeling any kind of pain before. "Unfortunately." Jeff's voice came out hoarse and broken.
Once again the fact that Jeff was avoiding the vampire's face made him miss the flicker of concern, guilt and then relief in Nick's eyes.
"What are you doing with that in your hand?" Jeff asked after a while. Nick threw the stick to under the armchair and got up walking towards the window.
"I don't know what you are talking about." He said coldly. Nick closed the window and the curtains and walked to his bed to sat on the edge. Jeff looked up at him, his face was emotionless but his eyes showed… Before Jeff could understand what emotions were crossing Nick's eyes, he blinked and the walls were all back. No emotions on his eyes again.
"Why do you keep doing that?" The words were out of Jeff's mouth before he could even think of them.
"Doing what?" Nick asked coldly raising an eyebrow and glancing at Jeff. Instead of his usual predator gaze Nick was looking at Jeff just coldly, like was pushing something away. What had caused such a change on the vampire? He would never know.
"Don't even deny it!" Jeff said resting his head on the wall behind him. "You always escape these questions." He mumbled.
"What questions?" Nick asked avoiding Jeff's eyes.
"Why did you keep me? Why didn't you kill me yet? Why were you with a wooden stick on your hand? Why did you pretend you care when I was sick? Or do you really care? And why do you keep hiding your emotions behind this cold vampire mask who doesn't give a crap about anyone."
"Because I am a cold vampire who doesn't give a crap about anyone." Nick answered avoiding the other questions.
"I don't believe in you." Jeff mumbled looking away. "I know behind that stupid mask there's someone with feelings."
"Don't push it!" Nick said angrily slamming his hand against the bed. Jeff jumped slightly but as the bed was shaking it did go unnoticed to the vampire.
"Kill me then!" Jeff said nearly shouting. "I am sick of this! Why can't you just end with this now?" Jeff shouted the last words and that made his chest burn, but he didn't show it to Nick.
Nick looked away from Jeff's face and took a deep breath to calm himself down. "I've told you. I'll keep you as long as I want. And if you complain and bother me too much believe me I can make it even worse." Nick said in a calm dangerous tone and getting up. "Now eat, and drink water." He said completely emotionless before he left the room.
Jeff groaned and looked up at the ceiling, if he couldn't move how was he supposed to eat? He wasn't hungry anyway. But after five minutes his stomach was growling. Jeff groaned and slowly sat up ignoring the pain the bites were causing.
He reached for the bags with the food and water and ate something, he wasn't actually paying attention to what it was, his mind was wondering about how he could leave that place. He couldn't jump off the windows, they were high and he was wounded so it wasn't a great idea. He could always wait Nick was out to hunt and try to escape again.
No. That was a stupid idea. He tried once and that had been the result. Jeff's eyes filled with tears. He should just give up. Why try? He would never leave that place again! And now that his friends thought he was with his parents it would be too late when they came back.
The tears fell on his cheeks and his throat closed not allowing him to eat more. Jeff pushed the food aside and closed his eyes. Maybe he could end that, maybe he could make all the pain go away with one act, maybe it was as simple as that.
He slowly pulled his legs out of the bed hissing in pain and got up. He had to be as quieter as possible, if Nick found him he wouldn't be able to do it.
He leaned down to pick the wooden stick that was underneath Nick's armchair biting his fist hard to stop himself from doing any type of sound, as he reached for it he slowly got up, his body was burning with pain.
Jeff just stared at the stick in his hand, was he really going to do this? Was he really going to give up everything? But did he have any other option?
Jeff allowed himself closing his eyes and wander around his memories. Happy mostly. With his parents, with his friends, but then Nick's face appeared behind his closed eyes, making him shot them open. Jeff took a deep breath.
He raised the stick slowly pointing it directly to his chest. It hurt just to do that small movement but he didn't give up. Jeff closed his eyes again and took another deep breath. Apart from those last days his life had been good, happy, of course with its ups and downs but that was normal for a teenager. His heart was racing and pounding loudly in his ears, the blood in his veins was flowing way too fast. Jeff took another deep breath and was ready to do that move, the move that was going to end it all when a hand stopped him.
"What are you doing?" Nick asked, he didn't sound angry but still Jeff froze completely terrified.
Oh no. What is he going to do now? Jeff thought refusing to open his eyes. Nick took the stick out of his hands slowly and way too softly for Jeff's taste and then he made him turn to him. "I asked you something." Jeff could feel Nick's breath on his face. It wasn't cold like he had expected but it wasn't warm either. Jeff kept his eyes closed, losing all the emotions that Nick was letting cross his face and eyes.
"I… Nothing." Jeff finally mumbled.
For Jeff's surprise he felt Nick's arms around his waist pulling him closer. "Don't lie to me. You know how much I hate it." Nick said in his usual soft tone.
Jeff shivered. "But you'll be mad." Jeff said childishly. He was still terrified with the situation. What if Nick decided to just suck all his blood right there? Well, it would be good because it would all end but at the same time Jeff knew how much that would hurt. And the fact Nick was so close didn't help at all, he could just rip him apart so easily. But was that the reason his heart was pounding so fast and strong? Because he was scared?
Jeff didn't have the time to answer these two questions since Nick interrupted his thoughts. "Tell me." He said softly but firmly. What was happening? Why was Nick being like this? Usually by now Jeff would be screaming and Nick's fangs would be completely sunk in his skin.
"I... I was going to end it all." Jeff said shutting his eyes strongly waiting for the pain to strike him.
Nick didn't move for a while. "Don't try it again." He said calmly making Jeff more confused and slightly frustrated. What was happening? Jeff asked himself over and over again.
Jeff slowly opened his eyes to find Nick really close to him, he felt his cheeks burning. "What are you doing?" He mumbled.
"Shut up…" Nick said softly before closing the gap between them, Nick seemed to be in an internal fight. His face wasn't showing any type of emotion, but his eyes… They showed Jeff he was confused and somehow in some kind of pain and there was something else, but once again Jeff had never seen that emotion like that so he couldn't quite tell what it was, but it seemed need.
Nick was so close to Jeff now. Their lips were almost touching, and Jeff's body was aching for that touch. He wanted to kiss him. There was something about that vampire that Jeff was really attracted to. Maybe was the fact he knew behind the mask Nick denied to have there was someone with emotions, the fact he had kept Jeff alive showed that. Also, the way he was looking when Jeff woke up, and the way he was looking at him, now… But maybe was his mind playing tricks, maybe vampires were made to be attractive.
Their lips were so close, Nick could feel Jeff's body's warmth, he could feel Jeff's heart racing, he could feel his blood flowing fast in his veins.
Nick stopped moving forward, he was now just staring at Jeff's lips, his eyes were still filled with emotions and when Jeff thought he was going to kiss him finally Nick blinked and Jeff almost felt all the walls hitting his face. Nick seemed to be slightly angry now, he moved faster than Jeff's eyes could see and before Jeff knew Nick was biting his neck hard.
Jeff yelped but when he was expecting Nick to start sucking his blood and the really pain to begin, Nick only licked the bite and pulled away.
Jeff's knees lost strength but Nick's arms kept him from falling. Jeff grabbed Nick's shoulders strongly to support himself. "Why do you keep doing this?" He asked faintly fighting to stay conscious.
"I don't know what you're talking about." Nick said coldly laying Jeff on the bed. "Sleep."
"I don't want to. I want answers!" Jeff mumbled his eyes were already closing although he was trying to keep them open, he wanted answers. He wanted to know what was going on with Nick, but his body was shutting down without his permission.
A couple of hours later Jeff woke up with a gasp. His neck was hurting, not as much as the first time Nick had bit him, but still it hurt. He sat up slowly the sound of someone playing a piano faintly in his ears.
His head was spinning lightly but he ignored. He still wanted his answers. Jeff got up lazily and stumbled to the living room, supporting himself on the walls so he wouldn't fall.
He reviewed in his head the questions he wanted to ask, and the way he was going to ask them. If he used the wrong tone or just one wrong word Nick could get mad again and Jeff didn't know if he could lost more blood or even if he could take more pain.
The piano stopped as Jeff arrived the doorway, telling him Nick knew he was there. "I still want answers." Jeff mumbled weakly.
"You won't give them." Nick said calmly still turned to the piano.
"If I am going to die, what you could, at least, do was telling me." Jeff said sliding to the floor to sit down looking up at Nick.
Nick growled loudly making Jeff flinch and shiver, he didn't like that, Nick was getting angry already and he didn't even start with the questions.
"Why and what do you want to know so badly?" Nick asked angrily turning to Jeff. "That can't be only curiosity!"
Jeff took a moment to think. "I already told you." He said calmly watching Nick carefully. "I want to know the real you."
"Why?" Nick asked angrier.
"Because..." Jeff stopped there. He didn't know himself. Was it because of the feeling he had had when Nick seemed to be about to kiss him? And what were those feelings exactly? Jeff didn't know, he had never felt something like that before. "I don't know." Jeff thought about the previous night, maybe if it had been under other circumstances Jeff would have liked part of that night. The way Nick had behaved, like he wanted Jeff.
Nick made a disgusted face. "Even I know you better than yourself." He mumbled looking away from Jeff.
"What is that supposed to mean?" Jeff asked raising an eyebrow faintly.
"Come on, Jeff. The way your heart races when I am close, the way you blushed when I was about to-" Nick took a deep breath. "And the way your heart is racing now! You like me, don't you?" He glanced at Jeff.
Jeff didn't say anything for a while, he lowered his eyes to his hands.
Was Nick right? Did Jeff like him? The answer hit him like a train, and he decided maybe he would have liked to stay in ignorance. But maybe it was some especial vampire power, maybe Jeff only felt what Nick wanted him to. He looked up at him, Nick looked annoyed so he concluded he didn't want Jeff to feel that way.
Maybe vampires had a especial attraction power, so they could get victims more easily, that made sense, and maybe that was why Jeff was feeling like that.
But what did Jeff like about Nick, exactly? Until now Nick hadn't showed any type of sympathy towards him, had he?
No. He had thrown him to a dark room for almost a day, he bit him several times – and the last time had been completely unnecessary. But then he remembered the time when he felt sick, Nick had stayed there. But between the rest that 'good action' didn't matter.
Another memory flashed in Jeff's mind, the way Nick was looking when he woke up, the voices he heard when his mind was drifting to unconscious, the hand in his shoulder and the calming words when he woke up screaming.
"Do-do you like me too?" The words were out of his mouth before he could think if he really wanted to say them. He knew it was the wrong question because Nick slammed his hand against the piano's wood making Jeff jump.
"I can't! And I shouldn't!" Nick hissed more to himself. What did that mean? Did he like him or not? "You're just a human!" Nick looked disgusted with himself.
"What does that mean?" Jeff ask hoping Nick would answer.
Nick just growled and turned his head away from Jeff. Jeff gulped, he was almost one hundred percent sure about what would be Nick's answer. "It doesn't mean anything. You're just food to me. As soon as you understand that the better." Nick said coldly. "As soon as I understand that the better." He mumbled to himself under his breath, obviously for Jeff not to hear.
"Then what ha-happened la-last night?" Jeff stuttered out. Clear images of Nick ripping his shirt off on his mind, the soft but hungry for more bites and the kisses he had pressed against his neck. That had to be more than just a way to feed himself.
"You mean two nights ago." Nick murmured. Jeff nodded, he had stayed off for two days then. "And that was nothing." Nick said angrily.
"It didn't seem like nothing." Jeff mumbled.
"Shut up!" Nick shouted.
Jeff shivered but didn't give up. "Then last, I mean, two nights ago you were just thirsty?" He asked his voice shaking a bit with fear.
"Yes." Nick answered but the lie in his voice was too noticeable.
Jeff didn't know what he was doing but when he found himself he was walking towards Nick almost tripping over his own feet.
Nick heard him and turned his head to him. "Where are you going?" He asked coldly but his eyes flickered an emotion Jeff didn't have the time to catch.
Jeff bit his lip but didn't answer, he was in front of Nick now and leaned down slowly closing the gap between them. Nick froze in his spot staring at Jeff's lips and the fact he didn't leaned away gave Jeff the confidence to continue.
Their lips were only millimetres apart when Nick got out of the piano's stool. "I don't know what you're trying to do, but stop it." He mumbled in a rushed tone looking at Jeff, his lips were pulled up showing his fangs.
"I-I was just-"
"I don't care!" Nick shouted interrupting him. "Don't ever do it again!"
Jeff nodded. Nick growled frustrated and kicked the couch making it move a metre to the side, then he started to mumbled things to himself like he was calming himself down. Jeff only caught one of the sentences as Nick was speaking low and fast. 'Don't even think about it Nicholas.'
What was he thinking about? Did he want to kiss Jeff as much as Jeff wanted to kiss him? Jeff's heart raced a little at the idea. What even was wrong with him, just a few days back he wanted to be as far from the vampire as he could, now he wanted to kiss him?
Nick growled louder and before Jeff knew he was being slammed against the nearest wall, Nick's eyes firing with anger. What Jeff didn't know was that Nick was mad at himself for letting himself like the blond.
"I-I didn't do anything now!" Jeff stuttered, he couldn't move because Nick was pinning his hands above his head and pressing his body against Jeff's. Jeff's heart was pounding hard in his ears.
"Your heart," Nick hissed. Jeff shivered and blushed lightly. "It's beating so fast, making your blood flow through your veins, making me thirsty..." Nick said taking control of the emotions he was showing.
"What are you going to do?" Jeff asked a bit scared.
"Scared now little Jeffie?" Nick asked softly, Nick liked more things that way. Jeff scared with him and him in full control of the situation, or so he thought. The next thing he knew Jeff leaned his head forward to kiss him.
Jeff didn't know what had crossed his mind to kiss the vampire but the truth was that he was indeed kissing him and Nick was kissing him back.
I hope you liked it! :)
Leave me a review?
I'll try to post the next chapter faster this time but I can't promise anything because: school.
Thank you for reading!
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