"Golpalott's Third Law states that the antidote for a blended poison will be equal to more than the sum of the antidotes for each of the separate components…. What?"

Ron groaned and let his head fall on his desk in frustration. He would never understand this, not in a million years. He needed Hermione to help explain this to him… but that was never going to happen either. She had barely spoken to him since he and Lavender had started going out, something he was really starting to regret. Lavender was a bit too… clingy for Ron's tastes. Then again, he didn't really know what his tastes were.

"Well, definitely a Gryffindor," Ron thought, procrastinating his potions homework. "A Gryffindor and probably from our year or older….She should be pretty, but not too clingy either… Smart. She should be fairly clever too…. Maybe next time I choose a bird to date I'll pick someone who understands potions and can help me…"

As Ron lay there with his head in his book, he formed a picture of this perfect girlfriend in his mind. Smart… Pretty… Gryffindor… his age… all of a sudden a picture of Hermione came to mind, and Ron immediately sat up and blinked, hard.

Hermione?

She was the girl that came to mind when he thought of the perfect girlfriend? How could that be? She was bossy and brainy with bushy-hair and beside that, she hadn't spoken to him in weeks! Yet, despite all of her downfalls, Ron couldn't help but think that any man who had Hermione's affections was probably the luckiest man in the world.

Oh Merlin, he fancied Hermione.

Well it's not as if he didn't know that he fancied Hermione, he had known for sure ever since the Yule Ball. He just had never actually admitted it to himself before now.

"Won-Won!"

Ron groaned. Not now…

"Won-Won, I have a special surprise for planned for you tomorrow!" Lavender squealed, settling herself down on his lap. "Are you excited for your birthday?"

"Yeah, thrilled," Ron muttered, trying to work around Lavender. He really did not want to have any homework to do on his birthday, but it seemed that Lavender had other ideas.

"… So meet me in the common room tomorrow morning like I said, and then…Won-Won, are you even listening to me?" Lavender whined.

No. I'm not.

"Yeah, er – listen Lavender," Ron said. "I really don't want to have any homework to do tomorrow, so do you think you could just – er – not bother me tonight so I can finish?"

"But, Won-Won-"

"I really need to get this done, Lavender," Ron insisted.

Instantly Lavender's eyes welled up with tears and Ron regretted ever speaking.

"Fine!" she cried. "If I'm such a bother to you, then I'll leave! It's almost as if some stupid homework assignment is more important to you than me!"

With that Lavender burst into tears and fled up to her dormitory. Parvati followed shortly, giving Ron a hateful glare on the way up.

"Bloody hell," Ron moaned. "I'm starting to sound like Hermione."

"And what, exactly, is so horrible about that?

Ron looked up towards the source of the bossy voice and found Hermione standing before him balancing a pile of books in her arms, looking livid. This night just kept getting worse every second.

"I mean, am I that repulsive that becoming more like me would be such a horrible incident?" she demanded.

"What? I – No! – I mean–" Ron stuttered, apparently at a loss for words.

"Or are you trying to turn all your problems with Lavender on to me now, as if it's my fault you had to go out with her in the first place!" Hermione yelled, her hair practically crackling with electricity and her eyes burning with hatred.

"That's not what I meant! If you would just listen to me Hermione, I -"

"Oh, no, I've been listening to you for long enough, and it's gotten me nowhere. But, apparently all someone needs to do to get noticed around here is act like a complete tart, and then you perk up and start snogging the life out of them. Is that how it works?"

"What the hell are you on about? I notice you!"

"Yes, you notice me because I do well in class and you need help on your homework! That's all I ever was to you, isn't that right? I was just there for you to copy all my notes and homework and to teach you all the lessons that you don't listen to because you're always asleep!"

"That's not true! We were more than just-"

"More than just what, Ronald?" She shouted, her hair even bushier, clenching her teeth as if there was a particularly nasty insult she was holding back.

Ron stopped and glared at Hermione. He meant to say 'more than just study partners', but what had almost come out was 'more than just friends'. While he knew he was certainly harboring feelings for Hermione, he could tell by the look on her face that she was most definitely not harboring feelings for him, especially at the moment.

Right?

"You make things so difficult, Hermione," Ron grumbled.

"Oh, I make things difficult, do I? Well I'm glad that you're getting a little taste of your own medicine then, Ronald, because you are the most difficult and insufferable prat I've ever met!"

With that Hermione turned and stormed out of the common room, leaving a very confused and upset Ron in her wake.

"Why do these things always happen to me?" he moaned.

With a great sigh Ron started packing up his books and heading up to his dormitory. No use trying to finish it tonight, he couldn't possibly figure it all out now. As Ron got in bed and started drifting off, he hoped that at least tomorrow, his birthday, would be better than today.