I moved back home a few weeks later, right before Prim's graduation. My mother welcomed me back with no questions. "Your half of the room is just how you left it," she said, her hand stroking my face like she did when I was a child. I never let myself miss her or remember her from when she was better - I left that up to Prim because I thought I knew better. But here she was, as if the last eleven years hadn't happened, looking at me like the mother I used to know. She was different than when I left – she had color in her face and life in her step. So much had changed since I was gone.

She filled me in on the plans for Prim's graduation party. I tried not to let my disappointment show; I don't think my mother even showed up for my high school graduation, let alone threw me a party. Prim made me recreate walking across the stage and getting my diploma when I got home that night since she wasn't able to see it actually happen either. But this wasn't about me anymore. It was about Prim and making her happy.

My mother had been saving up money to buy Prim an entire luggage set with her initials sewn into them so she'd always know they were hers. It was a thoughtful gift, even though neither of us had that many clothes to transport at any given time. She also included a resized ring for Prim – one that she must have kept hidden from us during our darkest days or it would have easily been pawned off for groceries or our electric bill. It was the first piece of jewelry our father ever bought for our mother and I knew Prim would be head over heels for it.

"Do you want to go in on the luggage, Katniss?" My mother asked one day in a quiet voice.

I couldn't tell her that I opened a checking account in Prim's name and transferred 80% of my work income into it. Instead, I shrugged. "I got her a moleskin journal. I thought she might need a new diary now."

"She'll love that. I'm fairly certain her old one is full now that she's started spending more time around Rory Hawthorne."

It's her attempt to bond with me. And after my fight with Peeta and quitting Victor's Village, I accept her offer and for the first time in what feels like forever, I give her a genuine smile. When Prim gets home from school, she finds us sitting at the kitchen table, sharing a pot of tea and conversation, and practically skips with glee over to us, wrapping her arms around my neck.

"Katniss! You're back? Why aren't you at work?"

I turn to embrace my baby sister who is nearly taller than I am at this point – one of the few physical traits she inherited from our father. "I'm moving back here for a while. Figured I wanted to get as much Primmy time as I could before you leave us for college. Speaking of...Mom said you've heard from a few?"

Prim frowns slightly. "Yeah. I haven't decided yet. I still have some time."

"If you want to talk about anything, I'm here for you," I said, poking at her side until she smiled again. I pulled a chair out with my foot. "Sit. Talk to me. To us."

The inclusion of our mother made Prim's grin grow even larger. She plopped down in the chair and accepted the teacup my mother slid in front of her, even though apparently she was going through a "coffee" phase lately. She tells me about all the schools she heard from – some that she knew she'd get into and one that she never imagined she'd be wait-listed for, let alone accepted with a small tuition scholarship.

"It's not much," Prim said, looking at our mother. "It'll barely cover books for one semester. But it's nice to know they liked me."

"They loved you," our mother said, resting her hand on Prim's. "I told you not to worry about the money. We'll figure it out. I'll take out some extra loans or work more hours or something. We'll do what we have to do."

Prim pulled her hand away. "No, Mom. You and Katniss have sacrificed a lot for me already. State is just fine for a pre-med program, it's closer to home, and the in-district tuition waiver makes it much more feasible."

"Mom's right," I spoke up, "about the money thing. This is a great opportunity for you to fulfill your dreams." She's always wanted to be a doctor, even when she didn't know what a doctor was. She used to borrow Mom's work uniforms and waddle around the house pretending to fix the "boo-boo's" on anything she could reach.

Prim shrugged and changed the topic, but I made a note to talk to her more before she makes her final decision. There's no way I'd letting her settle for her dream. She deserved the best and she'll get it.

Sae took me back immediately, though she was quick to tell me I wouldn't be making the money I was used to. I was just as quick to tell her that I was only working for myself now. With Prim going off to college and my mother actually able to take care of herself, I was no longer responsible for the entire family. At least not to the extent that I was. I'd still add money to Prim's account whenever I could but she had enough to last a while. The regulars were still the regulars when I worked my first shift and they welcomed me back as if I had only missed a shift rather than almost a year with them. I found myself becoming increasingly bored with the slow routine and often let my mind slip back to what the others were doing.

Haymitch, when I told him I was heading back home and leaving Victor's Village, told me he'd come up with something to tell the others if they asked. He looked disappointed when I collected my final paycheck, but if he was, he didn't say so. I had tried to shove it out of my head – who was he to be disappointed in me? He was just my boss. I didn't care what Peeta or any of the others said, he wasn't a father figure to me. He was nothing, now. Just a boss. And they were all just my former coworkers. But I still wondered how they were doing; if Johanna and Cashmere were still at each others' throats every night, if Finnick and Annie were still together, how Peeta was doing.

Those were the thoughts that hurt the most. I wasn't able to sleep anymore, not restfully anyway. Every time I tried, I'd relive that last conversation with Peeta, each time growing more and more vicious. And every time I woke up, it was to the image of those cold blue eyes. The bags under my eyes became darker and more noticeable as the days passed but I brushed off anyone's concerns. I felt guilty enough, I didn't need to hear anything from anyone else. This was my bed. I made it. I had to lay in it. Even if it meant I couldn't sleep.

The high school always had their graduation ceremony on a Friday afternoon. The underclassmen loved it because it meant they had an extra day off of school right before their finals week. The parents loved it because they got an extra day in their weekend. Sae loved it because, as the only bar in the district, she always got plenty of spill-over celebrators. Prim had gone off to the rehearsal early that morning and my mother was sleeping off her shift from the night before, so I took advantage of the quiet house by sneaking down to the basement to my abandoned barre.

I kept my eyes closed as I stretched, masochistically missing Effie's chirping to "get lower, Katniss" or "keep your leg straighter, Katniss." I'd never admit it to her but my flexibility and strength would still be pathetic if it weren't for her insisting that nothing I did was good enough. And though it had been at least a week since I did my warm up, and my body resisted initially, I reverted back into my Victor's Village self. I flipped the radio onto a local station, waiting for a song with a good beat that I could dance to. I let my body flow with the music, my mind in autopilot, until I reached out for my dancer pole to do a spin and grabbed only air. My eyes shot open and I froze. There was no pole here. There would never be. That part of my life was over and there wasn't anything I could do about it.

So I ran back upstairs, slipped on my hiking shoes, and marched toward the woods I used to know and love. Before I started at Victor's Village, the woods were my sanctuary. I loved climbing the trees and playing in the lake a few miles up. But now, as I made my way under the foliage of my beloved trees, I was restless. I had hoped that I could get away from the memories I left behind, but the further into nature I got, the more I realized how perfectly my apartment reflected the sights and smells that were surrounding me. The candles Plutarch Heavensbee provided were indistinguishable from the fresh air here. The shades and blends of greens and browns on the walls surrounded me here, too. It seemed like I couldn't escape from my Victor's Village life, no matter where I was now.

But that was my past. And if there was anything I had learned in my life and from my former co-workers, it was that I couldn't let the past control me.

Prim was back by the time I returned to the house, complaining to my mother about how silly the rehearsal was since they'll just have to turn right back around to go to the ceremony. They're both dressed and nearly ready to go; my mother in a simple black dress and Prim in a skirt and blouse-combo that will breathe easily in the summer heat. "I just need to shower," I said lamely, as if they couldn't tell how sweaty I was.

My mother is in my room when I return, laying out a soft blue dress that was hers when she was my age but has transcended the test of time and fashion, apparently. I was grateful for the gesture, as I was certain I didn't have anything appropriate to wear to a graduation. Any dress I owned was too short and too tight and too Victor's Village. After I dressed, my mother made quick work of my damp hair, braiding it and pinning it up to keep it off my neck. The same hairdo she and my sister currently wore.

"You look beautiful," Prim said in an uncharacteristically quiet voice.

I reached out my hand to pull her to my side. "Eh, I'm nothing special. You're the beautiful one." From the corner of my eye, I notice that her blouse has pulled slightly out of her skirt in the back. I smoothed her shirt back into place. "Tuck your tail in, Duck."

She quacked at me which made our mother chuckle.

Johanna found me right before I was supposed to go on and stepped right in my path, effectively blocking me. She had an eyebrow cocked as she scanned me up and down. "Make 'em pay for you," she said casually, adjusting a strap on my top. She grabbed my hands and rubbed on some sort of paste and sauntered off.

"Let's get you some lunch before we head out," I suggested, shaking the memory of Johanna from my head.

The ceremony was as long as ever, with boring speeches from board members and the principal and class president that felt like they droned on and on. But finally it was time to present the graduates and thankfully, 'Everdeen' came fairly early in the roster. And as she walked across the stage, to somewhat surprisingly loud applause, Primrose made sure to look out in the audience at us. In the moment that our eyes met, I watched as every ounce of nervousness she may have been feeling was replaced by confidence.

I nervously glanced into the audience and only saw swarms of colors and shapes, though nothing recognizable. Until I caught a flash of blue. He was supposed to be keeping an eye on the customers, but it was clear that Peeta was watching me. And instantly I felt more confident. More comfortable. If he was going to watch me then I would watch him back.

I was amazed at the number of classmates who showed up for Prim's graduation party. I worried for so long that she would fall victim to the same ostracism as I did in high school and be another Everdeen loner, but it turned out to be the complete opposite. She flitted between groups of people, greeting and actively chatting with everyone as if it were second nature to her. Watching her blonde hair bob around and easily laugh with whoever she was talking to reminded me of how easy it had been for Peeta to interact with everyone he met. It was him who forced me to talk to anyone at work other than him and Annie and I knew it was because he had the gift of gab. The gift my sister also possessed the trait, by the looks of it. I shook my head. Today was about Prim. Today was not about remembering that former life.

Just like my mother suggested, Prim loved the moleskin journal I got for her – more than the luggage but not quite as much as the ring, which she slipped around a silver chain that Rory got her so she could wear it around her neck. As much as I hated the idea of my baby sister having a boyfriend before she went off to school, I had to admit that they seemed genuinely happy around each other. When the party had died down and everyone was gathered around in a group, she sat between his legs, leaning back against him while he mindlessly played with her soft waves.

"So, Primrose," Hazelle began, "have you thought anymore about where you'll head off to in the fall?"

Prim smiled and looked up at Rory. "I've got my acceptance letter for State all written up."

"What?" I asked. She was supposed to talk to me about this before she made a decision. Mom told me that even Rory was hoping she'd go to her top choice, even though going to State meant the two could be at the same school. "I'm sorry...you what? What about-"

"Katniss, we can talk about it later," Prim answered through tight lips.

I slumped back in my chair, knowing full well we were going to have quite the conversation. But for now, I let Hazelle and my mother and the other adults talk to Prim about her plans for the future. I kept my eyes locked on my baby sister, hoping she'd look over at me, but she never did. She was too smart and knew better by this point. But that night, when all the guests had gone and our mother excused herself for the night, the gloves came off.

"So you've decided where you're going?" I asked, leaning against the kitchen counter when she comes in for a drink. I don't bother to hide my frustration at her.

"I've made my decision, yes."

"And it's State? Instead of the school you've been dreaming of for as long as you knew you'd be going to college."

She sighed. "Katniss, please don't start-"

"No, Prim!" We both dart our eyes up toward our mother's room. Better or not, we didn't want to disturb her sleep. "This isn't some decision you make because of a boy or because you're scared or -"

"This has nothing to do with Rory," she hissed. "And I'm not scared. I'm thinking about what'll be best for everyone. There is no way that we can afford for me to go my top choice and I refuse to let this family go back into debt just because of me. It's just undergrad, Katniss, and I can save up so I make sure I get into the best medical school."

I pull my lower lip between my teeth. I've failed my little sister. I've tried so hard to protect her from this harsh reality of our lives but she's still figured it out. And she has let it dictate her life and her dreams. Just what I never wanted. "Prim, you can't just...you can't just give up on that school."

"Haven't you been listening, Katniss? I can't afford to have that dream."

"Yes you can," I said quietly, pulling a bank statement out of my back pocket. I unfolded it and handed it over to her.

"What is this?"

I waited for her eyes to scan over it and meet up with mine. "It's yours. It's a savings account for your schooling. So you can go wherever you want without worrying about money."

Her gaze dropped back down to the statement and I wait for her to ask what I know is coming. Where did this come from? How did you earn so much? What were you doing? I knew it was coming but I didn't know how to answer. Something told me she wouldn't buy that I made quite that much just by bartending at a fancy place in a different district. She'd want the truth.

"I...I was a dancer," I told her. "At Victor's Village. That's where I've been for the last year. I bartended for a little while and then started dancing and making a lot more money. Enough to take care of you."

"To take...care of me…so you're going back? When I go to school you'll go back?"

Now it was my turn to avert my eyes. "No," I said to the floor, my fingers picking at the peeling countertop. "I quit...a few weeks ago. I sold all my stuff and moved back here. For good."

"Why? Katniss, every time I talked to you, you were like a totally new person. You were happy and enthusiastic about work and your friends and your life. What happened?"

I let out a long sigh. "There was this group of people...they were 'against' what we did. They...well one person at least...was sending threatening letters saying they'd tell you and mom."

"So?"

I snapped my head up. "So?" Definitely not the response I was expecting.

"Yeah," she shrugged, her eyes hard on me. "So what if someone told us what you were doing? I'm more pissed that you didn't tell me."

"I thought...I thought you'd be disappointed in me."

She stared at me. "What's wrong with you?"

"Excuse me?"

"Seriously, Katniss, what is wrong with you? You and I know each other better than anyone else in the world and you thought I'd be...disappointed...that you were doing something you loved? That I would believe you were doing something that would be offensive or vile or that I'd think less of you for it even if you were?" I watched as she tore up the bank statement and let the pieces of paper flutter to the ground. "We don't need you to protect us anymore, Katniss. Mom's better, I'm an adult. I've made my decision and I'm going to State with Rory. End of discussion." She turned on her feet and huffed off to our newly shared room.

She was still awake when I made my way upstairs. I knocked on the door even though it was partially my room again now. When she called me in, I sat on the edge of her bed and tapped the top of her feet. "When did you grow up, Duck?"

"It happens," she shrugged. "Especially when my over-protective sister isn't around to make all my decisions for me." She kicked my hand at that, making sure I saw her smiling at me.

"What can I say, you're my family, Primmy. You and mom are the only family I've got and probably ever will have."

"That's not true, Katniss. Family's more than blood."

As usual, we didn't stay upset at each other for long, and that next Friday, I planned a special "sister's night" just like we used to have when I first started working at Victor's Village. "Prim!" I called, kicking the front door open and trying to balance the large extra-pepperoni pizza that I knew she'd love and I had been craving since I got home. I thought about just how many laps I would have needed to complete to work off the calories from just one slice but, even as I did then, I pushed it out of my mind. Nothing was keeping me from enjoying this grease monster. "Prim! I got dinner! Will you-"

I stopped when I saw her coming down the stairs in a skirt that reminded me a little too much of something I had seen Annie wearing one night at work. "Oh, hey Katniss. Want some help?"

She took the pizza out of my hands and set it down on the coffee table. "Thanks. You look nice."

Prim giggled and twirled around. "Yeah? I may have 'borrowed' these from your closet." I rolled my eyes, realizing why it looked so familiar. It was something Annie wore to work when the cap of the grenadine bottle slipped off and she spilled the deep red liquid all over her shirt and pants. I handed her the keys to my apartment so she could shower and change. Finnick made sure to tell me that the skirt made her ass and legs look gorgeous and I made him swear to take it completely off before they hooked up that night.

"You didn't have to get dressed up for me, Prim."

Her eyes widened as she realized she forgot about our night. "Oh my God, Katniss! I'm so sorry, it's just...it's mine and Rory's six month anniversary and he was going to take me out to dinner and-"

"It's okay," I told her, unable to contain my smile. "I'm just your sister, why do I matter? Go spend time with your boooooyfriend." I flipped the tv on, content to watch whatever I wanted and eat as much of the pizza as I could. "Make sure you're home at a decent hour. And don't drink. Or go parking with that little rascal. In fact, why don't you have him come in when he gets here so I can have a word with him. Those are the rules."

She rolled her eyes. "Your rules are absolutely ridiculous, Katniss."

"I'm just trying to protect you, Duck."

"He has rules set to protect us."

"Yeah, okay, Mom," she shot back in a mocking voice.

"...he's like a...well, shit like a dad on some level"

"I'll be home in a few hours. Try to save some of that pizza for me."

"I make no promises," I called back with a mouthful of food. I flipped through the slightly expanded channel selection - a gift for my family from me so we had more than the basic three now - and smiled at the show on our only movie channel. The Lego Movie. It was such a ridiculous movie and I knew as soon as I flipped to it, I'd get 'Everything is Awesome' would get stuck in my head. I sang it quietly once and turned my head, waiting for Peeta to make fun of me for getting sucked into the movie.

"Fuck me," I muttered, picking up my cell phone. I couldn't run from my past but it seemed I couldn't really outrun it either. Or the impact it was having on my present. I cringed as I waited for the voicemail message I knew was coming to play. "Hey. It's Katniss. Um, when you have some time, can you give me a call back? I need to talk to you."

"I'm not going to lie, Sweetheart, I wondered if you were coming to your senses anytime soon." Haymitch was sitting in a corner booth of a bar a few miles from Victor's Village. It was the first time I ever saw him outside of work since I left and the first time I had ever seen him outside of the club itself. But he suggested the place, saying he figured I wouldn't be comfortable being back there when other employees could show up at any time. Admittedly, I hadn't considered that, but he was probably right.

I slide into the seat across from him with a sigh. "Yeah well, I like to keep you guessing."

He snorted and took a swig of his amber liquor that I strongly suspected came from his own bar rather than this place. "How Seam of you." He set his drink down. "Don't act so surprised that I used that phrase. How else do you think I knew so much about you before your interview?"

Sitting across from him, I started to see all the pieces come together. Dark olive skin, sharp, coal-grey eyes, a refusal to trust anyone right off the bat. Even his accent, which sounded so normal to me, was distinctly District 12. He was from the wrong side of the tracks, the same side as me. "I didn't recognize your surname."

"You wouldn't. My family's been gone longer than you've been alive. But I know yours. Your father was a good man, we used to run around together when we were kids. Until he met that mother of yours." Haymitch snickered. "He really made waves when he brought her 'round. Even if it hadn't been for your last name, I'd have recognized you right away."

"I look like him," I said quietly, still in shock that my former boss knew my family. "That's what everyone says."

"You're very Seam," he agreed. "Physically and mentally." He finished his drink and hailed the bartender over for a refill. "I doubt this little walk down memory lane is why you wanted to talk."

I set the manila envelope I came in with on the table and slid it over to him. "These are all the things I've gotten; all the letters, photographs, threats, everything. They continued for a few days after I moved out but whoever sent them clearly got the memo that I was gone."

I couldn't meet his eyes as he opened the envelope and skimmed through all the contents, sighing heavily at each thing. I had stopped opening the mail at some point, but Haymitch was quick to open everything. The stale stench of roses was suffocating and it wasn't until he stuffed everything back into the larger envelope that I felt like I could breathe. "What do you want me to do about all this?"

I should have known it wouldn't be that easy. "I should have turned these into you as soon as I got them. I shouldn't have intercepted them at the front desk of my building and I should have just...trusted...you."

He's quiet for a moment before he starts cackling. "You are just like your father, you know that? That's why I told the front desk to hold them but give them over if you insisted. I had hoped, though, that Mellark would have been able to get through to you." My jaw dropped slightly and he laughed again. "Seriously, haven't you figure out that there's nothing in my club that gets past me? He's a good kid, Katniss."

"Yeah," I laughed. "Too good for me."

"True," he agreed with no hesitation. "Well, it would seem that with Annie's back healing quickly, we may need a head bartender again. Is that something you'd be interested in?"

"Really?"

Haymitch shrugged. "Like it or not, you're a part of us. You'd be welcome back if you wanted. And we could probably work something out with the girls to give you at least one night of dancing."

I stood outside the club and waited, my back leaning against the brick wall. After what felt like a lifetime, but was really only about 20 minutes according the constant checking of my phone, I heard the doors swing open and a familiar heavy tread come toward me. I pushed myself off the wall and turned to stand in his way. "Hi, Peeta."

His smile was instant, but he caught himself and schooled his features. "Hi, Katniss. It's been a while."

"It's been like a month, Peeta. I don't know if that qualifies as a while." My lame attempt at a joke didn't work as well as I hoped. "I didn't exactly leave on the best terms."

"Not exactly."

I sucked the inside of my cheeks between my teeth. "That night of my birthday, you, Johanna, Finnick and Annie all talked about what led you guys here. And you remember how I avoided answering the question altogether?"

"Yeah."

I laid it all out for him, telling him about my father's death and my mother's reaction. I told him the lengths I went to as a child to keep food in my sister and invalid mother's bellies until I was old enough for my first job. I told him about having our power cut and the notes Prim would bring home from school about the deterioration of her clothing. I told him what high school was like, that I didn't have any real friends or anyone I could depend on other than myself, even though my mother was finally able to go back to work. That I built up walls to protect my sister because she was the only thing that kept me going everyday.

"Everything I have done since I was eleven years old was for her. I couldn't lose her, any part of her. I took this job so she could go to college, Peeta. So she could do something better than what was waiting for her in District 12." I let out a breathy laugh. "You all came here because you had no family back home. What was I supposed to say to that? I came because I did have family I was protecting?" I felt the tears prick at my eyes but I blinked them away. "Those threats were real to me, Peeta. I was failing her, I wasn't protecting her like I should have."

He pursed his lips. "I guess...I wasn't very sensitive about the situation. You were right; when Citizens of Snow sent me those letters, it didn't mean the same as it did to you." It was probably the closest either of us would get to apologizing since we both thought we were doing the right thing at the time. "I wish you had called me, instead of just leaving. So I knew you were okay."

"That's what Prim told me, too. She laid into me pretty good when I told her everything."

"Smart girl."

"I'll let her know you approve."

I heard him snicker and when I looked up, I saw that crooked smiled on his face.

"I'm here now, aren't I? Better than a phone call." I jokingly punched his arm, pleading for his smile to last. Hoping that he takes my minimal words for what they really mean. I'm sorry. I miss you. I need you.

"I heard Haymitch offered you your job back."

"News travels fast," I chuckled. "Yeah, he said Annie's doing good enough to go back to dancing so there'd be a head bartending position available. Which would be less money than dancing but more than I'm making now at Sae's. And it'd be nice to be back with my crack-ship family, since my sister's off to college in the fall."

"Yeah, it's nice to be surrounded by people who care about you," he agreed, pushing his shoulder into me. "So you're gonna take the job, then?"

I twisted my toe against the sidewalk. "Well you see, Haymitch has this rule, right? And it says that coworkers can't date each other because it might screw up the dynamic of the club."

"Right, but no one really follows that rule. Not officially, anyway."

I licked my lips and exhaled deeply. "The thing is, I want us to be official…that is...well my sister wants to meet you before she leaves. And I want you to meet her. As...my official…" I nervously glanced up to him, knowing I wasn't as smooth as I had been when I was rehearsing my mini-speech earlier. I knew I had been holding my breath because I could feel the pressure in my chest mounting with each passing second. Waiting for his response.

He reached out for my hand and threaded his fingers through mine. "I'll allow it."

I pulled him close to me and without missing a beat, bring my lips to his. My lips parted and allowed his tongue entrance, reveling in the flame that was rekindled between us. We pulled apart and he rested his forehead against mine. "I suppose you'll want me to get you a pole for Christmas?"

I grinned up at him and winked. "Why wait till Christmas? You have a birthday coming up, don't you?"

AN: Oh man, I'm sorry about this delay! When I posted the final chapter over on Ao3, was acting weird, so I never got a chance to update it. And then I kind of forgot because I thought it was already posted. Thanks for the review with the reminder, Pikelet! So yeah, this is the end of this story. I hope you enjoyed it, it was fun for me to write and it went to a great cause. SPEAKING OF. Year FIVE of F4LLs is coming up soon! Consider writing for or donating to this great charity raising money for Leukemia and Lymphoma research - you get to read some pretty awesome stories before they're available to everyone. :)