AN: Charmie, thank you so much!
BellaMadonna, I 3 You
My BFF Jeremy (girl with a dude's name), no clue what I would do without you.
WARNING: I have a few of you who dont want to read slash lemons, so therefore I am warning you that there is a B/A lemon in this chapter. I say you should read it, but its up to you. You might miss something if you dont...
And for those who dont know it, I wrote chapter 1 in EPOV which you can find if you click my username and scroll down to All I Need.
When your done, read the AN at the end of this chapter.
Dont own Twilight, dammit.
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BPOV
I drove for quite some time, at least 20 miles, before I took the next rest stop exit I saw. I looked at myself in the rear view mirror; my face was red and swollen from the intense crying. I was the image of shame and utter guilt. I could see it in my eyes clear as day.
My cell had been ringing constantly since I raced from Edward's house, all of the calls being from him. Throwing my phone into the floor of the passenger seat, I shoved open the door to my car and quickly walked into the bathroom.
I roughly splashed water on my face and used my fingers to tame my messy hair. I braced myself on the sink and stared myself down, trying to find the Bella that has control. The Bella whose skin is like steel, whose face had not seen tears in so long I couldn't remember the last time. She was there somewhere, I just knew it.
I stood in the bathroom for what seemed like hours, but realistically it was mere minutes. I waited until my eyes were clear, and my cheeks lost their redness. I took several deep breaths, and walked back to my car. I started the engine and rested my head on the wheel, just then Alice's ring tone chirped at me. I reached for my phone and shakily answered.
"Hello?" I said in a low voice, attempting to hide any emotion.
"Hi, baby," Alice practically sang to me, her happiness in her voice warmed my soul. "Where are you? I thought you would be home by now?"
"Oh, um," I said, my voice never once cracking and giving me away. "I just went for a little ride after I left Edward's." I considered for a moment telling her a lie, but I couldn't deceive her anymore than I already did.
"Why did you do that?" she asked, her voice laced with disappointment. "I thought you would come straight home? I mean, it's kind of a big day for us, you know."
"Yeah, I know," I said, hearing her tone caused a dip in the pit of my stomach. "I'm on my way now. Ok?"
She sighed heavily into the phone. "Bella, let this be your lesson in baby making," she said matter-of-factly. "I read if you have an orgasm after inseminating, it helps the little swimmers make their way inside."
"Oh?" I breathed.
"Yes, so get your ass home this instant!" she commanded.
"Of course, my queen." I said, feeling a sudden urgency to hold her. To feel her against me, to wash away all my thoughts of what transpired mere hours before, I just needed Alice.
Ending the call after giving her my love, I made my way back to our home. My mind was focused on Alice the whole drive. She would be my rock, My tether to sanity.
I arrived home to find Alice waiting at the door for me. Her big toothy grin spread across her face, as I took her in my arms and hugged her with all my might.
"Baby, please, I need to breathe," she said through a giggle.
"I know, I just love you so much sometimes I have to hug you just a little more than usual." Truer words had never been spoken.
"Aww, baby I love you too!" she said, kissing me on the lips. Her touch soothed me, causing me to melt into her arms. My lips lingered on hers, breaking only when she pulled from my grasp to look me in the eyes.
"So, are you ready for me to pleasure you?" She cooed, emphasizing the word with seduction.
"Actually, baby," I said, choosing my words wisely. "I think the little swimmers, as you call them, either made it or didn't by now." I gave her a loving smile, not wanting her to think of what I was saying as rejection. "I am going to take a shower. Ok?"
"Yeah, you're probably right." Her face fell with slight distress.
Wanting to remove any thoughts of rejection from her mind, I lifted her chin and brought her lips to mine. Never deepening the kiss, I hugged her closely. Pulling from her lips I ducked my head down and nuzzled my nose in the nape of her neck, breathing in her perfume. A sigh of contentment escaped her throat. I squeezed her lightly one more time before letting her go and made my way to our bedroom.
I stripped in our bedroom and walked to the bathroom in a towel. I turned the water on as hot as I could handle, bracing myself against the tiles of the shower as I let the water wash away any trace of Edward. The thought of washing him off me brought on a wave images from earlier today. Thoughts that were too much for me to handle. I quickly turned off the shower, and wrapped the towel around me.
Still dripping from my shower, I searched the house for Alice. I needed to see her. I needed her smiling face to take all of the thoughts roaming in my head of Edward.
I found Alice in the living room, looking adorable as she watched "Hedwig and the Angry Inch". She was singing along to 'Wicked Little Town', bobbing her head to the beat. She was so beautiful and all mine. I could get through this, I just had to remember this was about Alice and our new family.
I stood in the doorway in nothing but my towel, and seductively sauntered into Alice's view. She slowly turned her head to take in my entire body, and cocked one eyebrow at me.
Looking into the depths of her eyes, a fiery passion swept through me. This ignited the flame in my being causing me to lunge towards her lustful body. Ripping her shirt off her braless body, unleashing her creamy smooth skin and finding her supple breasts with my indomitable tongue.
I found my way to her nipples. Sucking, tugging, and circling them within my warm lips. Ensuring her arousal with my movements, her moans of pleasure encouraged my every nibble.
Slowly I traced her body from breast to chin with heavy kisses. Seeking solace in the moist heat of her tongue. Somewhere in my mind, I thought her kiss could erase my shame.
Alice sighed into my mouth as I firmly pressed my lips to hers, forcing my tongue into her mouth. My hopes in drowning out the memories of being with Edward were dashed the instant I felt her tongue on mine. Thoughts flooded my mind of kisses stolen, mere hours ago in Edward's bed.
Alice felt my moment of hesitation, and pulled her head away from me, silently voicing her concern. Ignoring her pleas, I made my way back to her breast then to her belly button. Feathering kisses along the way, I continued my way down pausing at the waist of her jeans. I quickly unbuttoned her jeans, and pulled them off of her, leaving her panties in place.
I grasped her panties with my teeth, and gently started tugging them down. Her hips instinctively ground up towards the heat of my face, as I pulled her panties down in the vice grip of my jaw. Passing her glistening lips, the scent of her arousal sent a beacon of lust directly to my already throbbing clit.
After ridding us of her panties, I looked at my lover like a hungry lioness ready to drink her in. Her hands gripped the sofa causing her knuckles to whiten from the anticipation of the impending pleasure.
Instantly I dove deep between her legs. My lips making contact with her clit, gently sucking it in my mouth. Rubbing my tongue firmly and swiftly along the nub, I felt her toes curl against my thighs. Her body began to writhe with ecstasy.
I reached my hand up to shove her leg aside and roughly slipped one finger and then another inside her, sending shivers through her body. I twisted my fingers, searching out her g spot. With an intense cry, Alice begged for me not to stop. Wanting to please her, I continued my quest for her climax.
I felt her body let go as her orgasm rippled through her like an earthquake. My name barely escaped her clenched teeth as her climax continued to vibrate through her every cell.
I sat back on my knees and watched as Alice attempted to gain control of her breathing. A smile graced my lips at the knowledge of the pleasure I bestowed upon her.
Her eyes slowly opened as she reached her quivering hangs towards my body. I stopped their decent, bring her into an embrace.
"Bella," she whispered. "Let me-"
I cut her words off with a gentle finger on her mouth.
"No, baby," I said, looking her in the eyes trying to relay my intent. "This was just for you." I brought her hand to my mouth and kissed the palm of her hand. I reached down and picked up her panties, slipping them up her legs and back in place. Kissing her thigh as I stood up and settled next to her on the couch.
It wasn't long before I heard her breathing even out as she fell asleep next to me on the couch. I softly woke her up just enough to move her to bed, and crawled under the covers next to her. She never stirred once positioned on her side in bed, light snores coming from her mouth. I rolled to my back and stared at the ceiling, silently I cried myself to sleep.
***
I woke up the next morning to the smell of pancakes and bacon. I got out of bed and slipped on my pajama bottoms, rubbing sleep from my eyes as I walked to the kitchen in search of what my nose already found.
"Morning, sleepy head!" Alice chirped, looking bright eyed and bushy tailed. "I made my fucktastic lover breast pancakes!" She giggled, pointing to the table ushering me to take a seat.
As I sat, she brought what she was cooking toward me, and pushed the creation on my plate. The pancakes she served me sent me into a fit of giggles. Two round pancakes attached at the middle, with a small dash of whipped cream toward the center of each round along with one raspberry on each delectable mound.
"These have to be some of the most edible breasts I have ever seen!" I laughed, sweeping my finger through the whipped cream and licking it off. Moaning to show her my pleasure from the taste. "Mmm, and those nipples taste especially good!" Giving her the most seductive look I could muster up.
After shoving a mouthful of boobie pancakes in my mouth, I turned toward her and patted her ass. She quickly turned my way and swatted at my hand.
"I don't think so missy," she said playfully. "You don't get any from me until after you go to Edward's today."
My heart stopped at her words, as I forced myself to swallow.
"What do you mean?" I asked, confusion setting in.
"You have to do it twice," she reminded me. "Remember? To better our chances you should inseminate two days, at least, in a row."
Her words breaking through my resolve to oblivious to this fact. I already knew this.
"Edward said he isn't available today," I lied. The words came out of my mouth so quickly I didn't even have time to think.
"Is that so?" she said, her eyes narrowing showing her disbelief. "That's funny, because I just got off the phone with him before you got up and he said he was expecting you today," she said, placing her hands on her hips as she tapped her foot at me. "He called the house phone looking for you. He said you hit his trash can on your way out yesterday and made a huge mess."
Shit fuck. Think quickly.
"Oops." I said nonchalantly. My eyes averted back to my pancakes, and I pushed them around with my fork. I felt a surge of empowerment for a brief moment. I realized then, Edward and I needed to talk. I would go to his house, but there would be nothing but talking today.
"Okay, after I'm done I'll head to his house." I said, smiling at her as she sauntered back to the stove. "But, can you call him for me and let him know I'm coming?"
"Sure." She said, keeping her eyes on the batter as she poured it into a pan.
Thirty minutes later I found myself in front of Edward's house, once again willing myself to leave the car. I closed my eyes and reminded myself why I was here. One fuck up would not, could not ruin a friendship like ours. Edward and I had shared so much in the past; this is just a blip in the road of life. Yeah… right. A really fucking enjoyable yet completely wrong blip. Fuck, where did that thought come from?
Shaking my head to clear my thoughts, I walked to his door and knocked lightly. I heard his footsteps as he made his way to the door, this alone caused my heart to race. But the sight of him when he opened the door made my heart speed to levels that took my breath away.
"You knocked," he said, his eyes bore into my own with a glint of confusion. "That's weird."
"Uh, well, sorry." I muttered as I walked past him and headed to the living room, taking a seat on a cushioned chair.
I watched him as he sauntered to the couch, and took a seat. As he sat, his scent bellowed in my direction causing my breath to hitch. I averted my eyes to my hands and began to speak. "We need to talk."
"I know," he said lowly. "Can I start?"
"Yes," I sighed, as I raised my eyes to his. Showing him he had my attention.
"When you left the way you did yesterday," he licked his lips before he continued. "It really fucked with my head."
"I-" I attempted to rebut, but was cut off when he raised his hand in the air asking me to let him continue uninterrupted.
"I thought, being as close as we are that having sex with me would be easy." His eyes left mine, as he looked at his fidgeting hands. "I didn't think about anyone but me. I mean, I realize that now. I basically forced you to cheat on your girlfriend. I am an awful person." The guilt was heavy in his voice.
"When you left crying and the look on your face…" he said, shaking his head in self disgust. "I felt like a hole was ripped in my heart. I knew it was wrong, but when we were together, it felt anything but." He raised his head, his eyes once again meeting my own. "And I owe you an apology. I'm so very sorry."
I was silent for a while, collecting my thoughts. Being in the room with him was not uncomfortable at all. It was as easy as breathing. I knew I needed to make this right. I needed to take some of the blame off him. And then, we would get past this.
"I owe you an apology as well." I said, feeling the need to tell him the truth. "I scared myself yesterday." I admitted this not only to him, but to myself at the same time. "I felt confused, and just had to get out of here." My eyes shut as I confessed. "I felt ashamed… that… I enjoyed it more than I should have." I said so quietly, I didn't know if he could hear.
I heard him let out a deep breath. I looked him in the eyes and saw understanding in his eyes. He heard me, which should have made me wish I had never said those words. But the look of relief on his face from my admission was enough to know it was the right thing to say.
"Even so," I spoke quietly yet firmly. "I can't do… that again." He needed to understand my reasoning. "It fucks with my head." I used the same words he said to me moments ago.
He nodded his head, and stood up silently walking towards the kitchen. I heard him open the refrigerator, and then saw him walk towards me only to stop at the front door. He motioned me to meet him where he stood.
Feeling a bit confused, I followed his direction and stopped a foot away from him.
"I know we can't do it again," he said, handing a brown paper bag. "So here it is. Go to Alice, and make her a baby."
Realization hit me at the moment he gave me the bag. He was still doing this for us. For me and Alice.
I flung myself into his arms, and hugged him with voracity. I kissed him on the cheek as I loosened the hug.
"Thank you," I whispered, pressing my cheek to his.
I left his house with a sense of closure. Knowing that the hurdle was overcome, and I could get past this with both relationships in tact. I knew I was wrong to not tell Alice what I did. It went against every spoken and unspoken promise I had ever made to her. I just couldn't, and I wouldn't tell her.
***
When I arrived home and showed Alice the packaged, she utterly was thrilled that she would get to participate in 'making our baby' as she put it.
We quickly went into our bedroom, and I stripped from the waist down. She filled the syringe with the milky fluid and gently placed it deep inside me.
"Kinky!" I said with a laugh.
"You ain't seen nothing yet, sexy," she said from between my legs. "Now raise your hips for a few minutes."
"Now that, baby, is even kinkier!" I teased, as I raised my ass in the air earning a slap on my butt cheek from my giddy lover.
I stayed like this for several minutes until Alice deemed it was enough. She kissed me passionately, snaking her hand towards my still naked lower torso. With her free hand she gently tugged on my left breast, cause a surge of wetness between my legs.
She slipped one finger between my wet folds and rubbed gently and swiftly on my clit. I moaned in pleasure as she brought her lips to my neck, swirling her tongue along my collar bone.
"Mmm baby," she purred. "Come for me."
She pressed her fingers on my clit with more pressure, pushing me towards my climax. I felt myself teeter on the edge of an orgasm, but was unable to get there all the way. I closed my eyes and mentally worked on making myself cum. Unable to get there, I groaned out in frustration.
"Fuck!" I groaned.
"It's ok baby, we aren't in a rush," she said quietly, pulling my shirt up giving her access to my bare breasts.
I closed my eyes and allowed thoughts of yesterdays forbidden act to fill my mind. In a moment, I was cumming harder than I had the day before. Too filled with ecstasy to even worry what that meant, I rolled over and held my Alice. Wishing away any thoughts other than her.
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DONT FREAK OUT! Chapter 5 is all about B/E. Trust me, stick with me I have a plan that I think you will all enjoy! Charmie also made this story its own thread on the AU/AH forum over at Twilighted, and I am willing to post teasers if you make yourself known :)
Review for a chapter 5 teaser!
