Disclaimer: yada yada yada don't own inuyasha yada… :runs away frantically with evil plot blueprints, cackling madly: "YOU JUST WAIT….ONE OF THESE DAAAAYYSSS…!"

Chapter 4:

Bath and Bed

Well, so much for a peaceful night's rest. There was no way in hell Kagome was going to sleep peacefully tonight. All because a certain dog demon was going to be awake aaaalllllllll night long. Said demon had informed Kagome that he only rested while he recovered from battle. That meant that he would be wide awake for the long hours that everybody else will be heavily sleeping, oblivious to the world and any certain person wishing to leave the house to roam off into the night. Because Kagome just knew that he would stalk off in search of something, anything… a strange sound, an enticing smell, …and there wasn't anything Kagome could do but worry about the 'what-if's.' 'What if' he hears a car go by. 'What if" he follows it outside and down the street. 'What if' it leads him to downtown. 'What if' the police just happen to get involved... The list went on and on in poor Kagome's head, and all led to the destruction of the world and all creatures in it.

Well, the only thing she could do about it would be to ask him what he planned on doing for the entirety of the night.

"Hey, um, Sesshoumaru?" Her voice had come out squeakier than she had intended.

"Hnnnnnn…" was his stoic reply. She took it as he was listening.

"So…whatcha plan on doing all night?" she tried to make it sound casual. Really, she did. She waited with baited breath for a reply.

"I plan to view more of these videos. They are quite fascinating, and teach me much of your culture. Is this satisfactory?" He patiently waited for an answer.

Kagome mentally jumped for joy. Great! That's perfect! That's…."oh boy." She sweatdropped. "I'm turning you into a couch potato. You're going to be a vegetable by the time you go back home." She sighed and shook her head.

Sesshoumaru was bewildered.

Couch potato? What does she mean? And how could she turn this Sesshoumaru into a vegetable? How confusing this era is! His features had formed a frown in his mental distress.

Kagome hadn't noticed the confused expression of her impromptu guest; she was busy reasoning that if he said he was going to watch movies all night, that that was what he was going to do. She could sleep peacefully tonight.

She settled in on the couch beside him to finish her last movie before bed.

After Kagome had bounded off from the den, eager to begin her trip to dreamland, she suddenly remembered something. She popped her head back through the doorway.

"Hey, Sesshoumaru?"

"Hmmmm," he gave a disinterested reply to show he was listening. Kagome took this as she was okay to go and went on.

"There is one more thing…"

A sense of foreboding weighed down on his entire being as he stood before the door. The sounds coming from the other side told him next to nothing, except that shewas in there, doing some sort of strange ritual she had referred to as 'bath time.' Similar to his own bathing habits, he supposed at first that it would be as relaxing and soothing as he knew it to be. But as she went on in her instructing on how to work the 'tub' and 'showerhead' and the various substances used for cleansing and what each one was called and used for, he feared that his days of cleanliness had come to an abrupt halt…or at least until he left this accursed time period.

At first she had insulted him by asking if he was familiar with bathing. How absurd! To walk around smelling like the foul human peasants he so utterly despised? It was outrageous that she should think something like that. Him of all beings. Even Inuyasha, although he wasn't particularly fond of it, was familiar with bathing. But this had been the least of his troubles.

Once he had learned that he wouldn't be bathing in a proper natural hot spring, he grew anxious. Human bathing areas that were indoors, even those of royalty, consisted of wooden buckets barely large enough for a human to sit in. They were filled with water that had been heated over a fire, and many humans shared this same water, which became filthy, smelly, and cold by the time the last person bathed. And being a guest, it would only be proper that he be the last to bathe. A sign of gratitude, if you will, for the host's being hospitable. But the thought of being last sickened him to no end, so he had promptly informed the girl that he would not be bathing with the family. He would find a natural spring elsewhere in this country and returned when he had finished.

"But, Sesshoumaru, you can't just go up to just any body of water, strip down and take a bath. You'd be breaking so many of the government's rules that I can't even begin to name them all off. Indecent exposure, trespassing, pollution, all sorts of things like that. Besides, natural water isn't as clean as it used to be you know. Indoor plumbing is waaay much cleaner and more sanitary than anything you'd find out there." She had folded a fluffy cloth over her arm.

Sesshoumaru had only understood a small portion of what the girl had rattled off, but he understood enough. Natural bathing had been outlawed? And what was this 'pollution' she had mentioned? So many laws and decrees…how could one keep track? It seemed there was a law for everything. Laws for living, for dying, for eating, for fighting, weapons, clothes, animals, plants, land, water, air, killing…well, he could understand the killing part, but the rest was just unheard of. Why, there was even a law stating that only people with the proper papers could have a house. To him, this was complete nonsense. Any being with the abilityto build his own house should be able to havea house. Madness. Total chaos.

All his worries temporarily faded when he heard that there would be hot…running…water…and it would be all his for the bathing…ah, sweet bliss. Til he remembered the time period he was in. He just knew that something…he didn't know what…but something would go utterly wrong at the worst possible time while he was enjoying his bath. And that leads us to where he stood now.

In front of the door.

With the copper knob, that was…turning?

Sesshoumaru jumped back a couple feet, waiting for the unknown. His body held stone-still, every muscle tense with anticipation for what was to come. Suddenly Kagome flung open the door with a welcoming grin.

"Okay Sesshoumaru, bath's ready! It's all nice and hot, hopefully to your liking. Inuyasha doesn't seem to mind the straight hot water, so I figured that you're waaay tougher than he is, so it should be comfortable to you too. Enjoy!" She shoved the large blue towel in his stiffened hand and proceeded to push his solidified self towards the bathroom doorway.

"Remember, shampoo, rinse, conditioner, rinse, body wash, rinse, avoid the toilet no matter what, don't let anything touch your eyes, everything tastes awful no matter how good it smells, and don't, under any circumstances, do not sniff anything directly out of the bottle. Inuyasha did that once and passed out for nearly a day. Have a nice bath!" And with that said she closed the door behind her.

"Surely she doesn't expect me to consume that which is meant for cleansing? I am slightly more intelligent than that." He looked over to what he learned was the toilet. It was… full of water?

'For what?' he wondered lightly. He noticed a lever near the top, and had the sudden urge to push it. Then he chastised himself for his foolish cat-like curiosities. No, he would proceed to his bathing and return to the den to watch more 'videos'.

Kagome's voice muffled its way through the door.

"If you need any help Sesshoumaru, I'll be right here waiting for you to get done. Just beat on the wall or something to get my attention okay?" He rapped on the wall to let her know he had heard.

He leaned over the bathing tub, inspecting the water below. Amazingly enough, his nose detected no impurities; it was crystal clear. Still, he could never be too cautious. He mustn't let his guard down for a moment. He began to mechanically disrobe, pausing every now and then for anything suspicious.

So there he stood in all his naked glory in Higurashi Kagome's bathroom. Staring at a tub of hot water. After a few moments of building up the willpower to get in, he went for it. Slowly but surely he would do this. Place his hand against the wall.

Lift one leg up and over the tub.

Stick a solitary toe in... the water seemed to be satisfactory.

Submerse one foot.

Lean forward, lift other leg over tub.

Slowly submerse other foot.

Lower down into water.

Relax.

"Aaaaahhhhhh…" he sighed comfortably.

The water was perfect.

He inhaled deeply, allowing the steamy cloud to envelop his senses. Exhaling, he opened his eyes to take in his new surroundings. The tub was surrounded by three walls, and the sliding screen he had come through, which was still open.

The walls were a pale yellow, made of smooth, large panels. He looked farther up. Well, the lower halves were. The top of the walls were solid, and were of a lighter shade; almost white. And at the very top, edging the ceiling, was a strip of colorful designs and patterns. Two characters alternated at a steady interval all around the room. They were the kanji for 'peace' and 'tranquility', and were accompanied by a variety of flowers and such. All in all, the room was presentable enough. He nodded his head in approval. This indeed was a much better human dwelling than those he came across in his own time. His mind wandered briefly to his ward and retainer. No doubt, the little toad demon was frantic with anxiety, and most likely chastising the young girl for every little occurrence. The child in turn would be singing a variety of made-up tunes, picking flowers, and badgering Jaken countless times, inquiring about her Lord's whereabouts, and when he would return.

He mentally shook his head, clearing it of such thoughts. This Sesshoumaru did not linger on pointless memories. They served no purpose; solved no problems. He brought his mind back to the matter at hand.

Golden eyes scanned the area.

'Hn…' He spotted what he was looking for.

"Shampoo," he read aloud. Kagome's voice echoed through his mind.

'Now remember: Shampoo, rinse, conditioner, rinse…' Satisfied that this was the first item to use, he examined it.

'Interesting,' he mused. 'A brightly colored container, bearing pictures of a tree and…fruit.' He turned it around, finding a bit of information on this strange substance.

It read:

Nature's Wonders (R)

Berry Merry Splash Moisturizing Shampoo For Silky Smooth Hair. Indulge yourself in the aromatic blend of freshly picked berries while giving your Mane the parlor treatment it deserves. Our special formula

-revitalizes dry, damaged hair

-leaves it silky, soft, and manageable

-is safe on color treated hair

'Color…treated?' A frown formed in his confusion.

"Hnn…" he read on.

Directions: Wet hair, lather and rinse thoroughly. Avoid contact with eyes. In case of eye contact, flush thoroughly with water.

He read this part twice, and continued down the bottle.

Ingredients: Water, sulfate, sodium chloride, cocamidopropyl betaine, glycol stearate…blah blah blah…blah…

Three tries later, Sesshoumaru still found that none of that made since to him. He might as well have read it backwards, for it would have done him just as good. He would ask Kagome later what all these things were. Surely she would know.

The very bottom of the bottle read:

-Best when used with Nature's Wonders(R)conditioner This product not tested on animals

Please recycle.

In any case, he now knew how to apply this to his hair. He examined the top. Figuring out how to work it, he cracked it open…

Kagome was sitting in bed, finishing up a little bit of studying before sleep. Just as she closed her overly large textbook, a 'splash!' sounded from behind the bathroom door. She gave a curious look, set her book to the side and stood up. She walked over and put her ear up against the door. Hearing nothing, she peeked through the keyhole…just to make sure he was alright, of course! Her, Kagome, a peeping Tom? Hah! She gave a nervous chuckle, and looked around in the bathroom at what she could see.

'Let's see…there's the sink, mirror, towel bar, tub…'

A silvery-blue head came barreling up out of the water, along with much coughing and spluttering.

'…' Kagome's mind drew a blank. She watched as Sesshoumaru looked around for a moment, spotted something, and drew a wet bottle of shampoo from the bath water. A few mumbled curses were to be heard, followed by a scrunched nose.

It took the young teen a few moments and a shake of the head to fully realize just what had happened.

'Hnnn...oh!' It hit her.

"Heehee-" she clapped a hand to her mouth, and fled to the safety of her room, still muffling giggles along the way. Hopefully the full-blooded demon had still been too fuzzy-headed to pick up on her outburst, but she wouldn't take any chances. (giggle!)

Sesshoumaru stepped out of the tub, wrapping his lower half in the pleasantly fluffy blue towel. Omitting the few mishaps he had had, it had been a rather enjoyable experience, this bathing in the future. He mind drifted through the past half an hour. The foamy substance the shampoo had turn into… trying to read the 'in case of eye contact' with his searing eyes clamped shut. The wonderfully fragrant smells filling the room from the various soaps he used all over his perfectly chiseled body… the many conks and crashes via slippery tub and skin. Letting cascades of hot water pour down his front to rinse the lather from his mane… spitting the foul poison from his burning mouth with no relief. Yes, he would tell Kagome that it was overall enjoyable and suitable for his standards.

Oh, how he missed his own era!

(One dried-and-groomed dog demon later)

A solitary figure sat upon a couch in the Higurashi's den, eyes glued to the television screen.

This was absolutely fascinating.

Nothing compared in the least, in all his years of experience, throughout all his travels.

He was in love….with Hollywood.

After the family had went to replenish their energy for the evening, he had settled down in the den to watch his first choice: George of the Jungle. The cover really hit home for him, as it had a natural setting of a forest of some sort, with a variety of wild animals he had and hadn't encountered. And an interesting title to say the least. He was curious as to which kind of animal this George was; was it the large, gray-skinned creature with ferocious looking fangs? Or the oddly crafted bird with the oversized beak?

'Ugh, offensively-dressed humans. Maybe the George-beast eats them? How delightful that would be!'

However, it wasn't too long before he realized that the male human was the George-beast.

'Perhaps these humans truly think of themselves as lesser intellects than their gorilla brethren? There is hope for this world yet.'

But as he watched on, he could only grow more and more attached to the idiotic male and his female companion. His hatred for the villain also grew, for if there was such a thing he hated more than human filth, it was a crooked, spineless being such as this one. No morals, no honorable traits to speak of; this lowest of low worthless being hadn't a single right to consider himself a man. If only Sesshoumaru were given the opportunity to meet him in real life…

A low growl softy reverberated from deep within his well-built chest.

"A creature truly unworthy of the life he was given."

"BRRRRRRRIIINNNNNNNNGGGGG!"

"ARGH!" Sesshoumaru jumped at the accursed telephone.

"Blasted contraption. I thought humans were supposed to be resting at this ungodly hour of night." He grumbled to himself. The damned device had interrupted a very intimate moment between the jungle boy and his female friend around the fire.

"…"

What was happening to him?

He was enjoying a scene of human courtship?

"Wretched story."

And yet he still continued to watch the lovey-dovey couple before him.

"Not all humans sleep at night, Lord Sesshoumaru," a womanly voice called out to him from the other room.

Mrs. Higurashi came through the doorway in her night-clothes, phone in hand.

"Many humans, I dare say a great deal over half of our population, stay out through the hours of the night. Some for work, others for fun. If you'd like, Kagome can give you a tour this weekend of how some humans spend their nights, if these movies become a bore," She gave him a warm smile, her face tinted blue from the glowing television set.

"If your daughter has no objections, this Sesshoumaru does not reject the offer." He said in his famed tone of finality.

"Of course, Lord Sesshoumaru. I'll ask Kagome tomorrow if she wouldn't mind. Might I suggest that you offer her some assurance that our city will be safe from destruction at your hands? I have a feeling that she was very much concerned tonight that you'd grow bored with our humble home and venture out into the night, and our world would be no more." She lightly chuckled at her daughter's dramatic fears. Surely this well-behaved Lord, who chopped vegetables and spoke with such civility couldn't harm a fly, much less a defenseless person.

Sesshoumaru considered her words, and decided that if Kagome felt it was safe for her to allow him free-roam, she would give a more in-depth 'tour' of their village. Indeed, it would be a very wise move on his part to ease her worrisome thoughts.

"This Sesshoumaru agrees with your request. When Kagome awakens, I shall speak with her on the matter."

"That sounds like a good idea. She may be a little rushed in the morning, just so you know." Sesshoumaru gave her a curious sort of look.

"Kagome has school tomorrow, Lord Sesshoumaru. Has she told you about her school yet?" Mama Higurashi frowned a little at Kagome's forgetfulness.

"No. What is this school?" he inquired. The woman shook her head, and decided to let Kagome answer that question.

"Telling you that may create more questions than it answers, but I can tell you that Kagome will be gone just after dawn until mid-afternoon." Sesshoumaru thought this over in his mind, then asked another question in turn.

"What am I to do until that time? Watch these videos for the entirety of the day? Surely there are duties that need to be seen to around the shrine? Perhaps the elder priest requires assistance of some sort?"

"I'm sure gramps can find something he needs help with. I'll ask him in the morning." She went to leave the room.

"Oh! Here," she hit play on the VCR.

"I paused the show so you wouldn't miss anything while we talked. Goodnight, Sesshoumaru." She left the room.

Sesshoumaru looked back to the movie in wonder. Sure enough, only a few seconds seemed to have passed for the little people, yet he was positive that they had talked for a good twenty minutes. He looked back to where the woman had left the room.

"Fascinating."

-END-