Chapter 4: Action and reaction

Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal minds or any of the characters, and make no money with these stories. Please excuse any spelling mistake, as English is not my mother language… Thanks to all those who reviewed and made story alerts, it keeps me going!

"Do you think they are going to be okay?"JJ asked absently, her question obviously directed at the young doctor Reid although the blonde's eyes were trained on the back of the plane, where Emily was sitting, looking through the circular window.

"I don't know. I've never seen Emily so sad…" Reid resisted the urge to turn around and check on his friend's well-being. Emily Prentiss hadn't talked to anyone since they had gotten on the jet, and neither had Hotch, but that was less of a surprise.

"I don't even dare to ask what happened during their captivity…" The blonde sighed, obviously uneasy about the way her colleagues were bottling everything up.

"It's only been a few hours, JJ. Give them some time."

She made eye contact with her friend, trying to read behind his emotionless gaze. She could tell by the way Reid was twisting his hands and playing with his wristwatch that he was as nervous as herself, but he was fighting to hide the feeling. She just couldn't. Jennifer had always been an emotional person, and seeing her two colleagues so broken was tearing her apart.

"Did they tell you how they got out?" Because they had not processed the scene themselves, the BAU team was not aware of all the details yet. They would have to read the report.

"The head officer told me that Buntings had been found stabbed in the cell Hotch and Emily had been… held captive in." As the words escaped his mouth, Reid frowned. He didn't like thinking of his friends and coworkers that way.

"Give them a break." Rossi's voice came up from behind as the elderly agent came to sit next to JJ. "They need time to process what happened."

He lowered his voice so that the two agents they were talking about would not overhear them. David Rossi had tried himself to get through to Hotch, in vain. The man wouldn't talk about what exactly happened in the basement, sticking to a general description. The unsub kept them for a day and beat them both up when they wouldn't give in to his mental torture, he had forgotten his knife in the cell and they had managed to escape. But, each time David Rossi would look into the depths of Aaron's dark eyes, he was reminded that there was something more to it. And Emily wouldn't even hold his gaze more than a second, as though she was afraid that he could read through her mask.

"Strauss has been all over my ass the whole day…" JJ complained, ignoring the raised eyebrow Reid shot her. She wasn't usually vulgar, but the last two days had worn off her patience.

"I am not looking forward to be in DC…" Rossi said pensively. "You know what's going to happen, right? We are all going to be interviewed by internal affairs to explain how two trained FBI agents could be abducted without anyone noticing."

JJ and Reid nodded, their eyes simultaneously shifting to the windows of the plane. They knew that the next few days would be tough for everyone on the team, between the reports to write, the interviews to go through and the psychic evaluations for some members.

Xxx

Emily had been looking at her feet for the past three minutes, not trusting her watery eyes. She had never been so emotional in her whole life, but the past days had made her walls crumble altogether. Her mind was screaming 'I can't, I can't…' but she knew that she couldn't give up now. In the corner of her eye, she could see Aaron Hotchner pacing around, his hands dug deep into his trouser pockets. He was obviously waiting for her to make the call. Emily had come into his office almost half an hour ago, because she needed a minute to compose herself before confronting the team. To no one's surprise, the virtual minute had turned into twenty, but Hotch didn't seem to mind. His office had become his shelter long ago, for the nights when he was too depressed to get home or when he needed some privacy to look at Foyet's case file. So why could it not be a shelter to Emily as well?

The team had been back in Washington DC for eighteen hours, but Erin Strauss had coerced them all to take the rest of the day off. So each team member had gone back to his apartment. Under other circumstances, they would have used the opportunity of a night off to meet up in a bar and let out some of the pressure on their shoulders. But as the jet landed in DC just after two in the afternoon, they were all so mentally drained and physically exhausted that they couldn't imagine spending the evening anywhere other than in their respective beds. By the next morning, a schedule had been set up for the different profilers to meet with Internal Affairs and give their statement.

That was exactly why Emily Prentiss was trying to even her breathing in Hotch's office. She knew that the IA agents would undoubtedly feed the rest of the team on the details of the case, including her physical state. And Emily didn't want her friends and team mates to discover the truth about their torture from anyone else than her. So she had agreed with Aaron Hotchner that it was a good time to tell them about the rape.

Though this was easier said than done.

"I think Morgan is about to kick the door down…" He commented. From his position, Hotch had a clear view over the bullpen, currently occupied by a bunch of very concerned profilers. It was quite rare for their unit chief to have one-to-one meetings with one of his agents, and the closed door had finished to scare the whole team.

"Okay, let's get this over with." Emily said as she took in a deep breath and rose to her feet. She still had no idea how she was going to phrase this, but she needed to get it out now, before a reckless agent widened the news about a BAU agent being raped on the job. Her teammates would never forgive her for this lack of trust.

Eyeing the brunette closely, Hotch reached for the doorknob and stuck his head out. A single look was enough for the whole team to stand up and take the well-known path to Hotch's office. He waited for them by the door while Emily was trying to recollect herself. She had avoided his gaze ever since she had first stepped into the office, but strangely felt now like she needed the eye contact to keep going, to stay strong and focused. JJ was the first to enter the dim light of the office, and went directly to the other end of the room, so that everyone could gather in there.

"I know everyone's been wondering what was up with me…" Emily began, avoiding the four pairs of eyes that were watching her every move. Only Hotch, who felt on the edge of breaking down himself, was looking at his feet with great concentration. Something was off, everyone could see that.

"I… I don't know how to say this…" Emily was hesitant, but she would never break down in tears in front of her whole team. "A lot of things happened when we were held captive, and there is no doubt it will take some time for me… for us" she corrected, her gaze now directed at Hotch, who still was looking down to some spot on the floor. "… to digest everything. Having said this, I don't want you to learn about that by some stupid agent from Internal affairs."

Emily mentally kicked herself for being so defensive. It would be her entire fault if her teammates discovered the news by someone else than her. She took a deep breath, feeling everyone's eyes bore holes into her. Especially JJ. The moment Emily had begun her speech, she had seen the look of recognition on the blonde's face. JJ was trained to expect the worst and, being a woman, she knew what the 'worst' meant.

"Buntings raped me, while we were in that basement. I thought it was best if I told you, as it will appear in the report anyway." The brunette stopped, not knowing how to continue. There was nothing more to be said, really. Just the usual marks of support and compassionate looks from her coworkers, which she was already expecting – and dreading. No one said anything for a whole minute, but the brunette forced herself to keep her head high and hold the profilers' gazes. The whole point of this meeting was to show them that she was strong enough to get through this. She wasn't a victim, or at least had been telling herself so for the past two days.

"Prentiss…" Derek began, taking a step forward. The use of her surname resounded strangely, given the personal dimension of this conversation.

"I'm okay." She replied automatically, involuntarily raising a hand to keep the young agent from closing the distance between them.

"I'm so sorry…" It was only when JJ spoke out that Emily noticed the tears pooling up in the blonde's eyes. Despite the pain she was feeling herself, it was her friend's sadness which suddenly sent her over the edge. In two steps, the brunette had reached JJ and wrapped her arms around her stiff shoulders. Four pairs of disbelieving eyes followed Emily's every move. Neither of the men could believe that she was actually the one comforting her coworkers. They should be hovering over her, hugging her and letting her cry on their shoulders. But this wasn't the way Emily Prentiss worked.

"You knew?" Morgan's voice broke the silence, as he turned to face Aaron Hotchner.

"I was there." He answered without looking up. Hotch almost continued by saying that Morgan could go ahead and punch him in the face, but he stopped himself. Guilt had been eating him since that dramatic night, but he knew that his coworkers were too clever to stop at that thought. When he was convinced that Derek Morgan would not greet him with an answer, Hotch looked up to meet his friend's compassionate gaze. He hadn't expected the other men in the group to be so understanding.