Chapter 4 My Heart Is The Same
"Fidelo!" Charlie called to his best friend in the hall the next day, walking up to him quickly while they were between classes.
"Yes, Charlie?"
"I need to talk with you at lunch time. It's important. Will you eat with Manfred and I?"
"Of course I will," Fidelo promised, his expression curious now.
"Good. Thank you. We'll see you then."
"So, what's this all about, Charlie?" Fidelo asked, setting his fine-porcelain lunch plate, his white cloth napkin and pure silverware down at the open side of the round wooden table in the school's fancy dining area. "I've been driving myself crazy all morning wondering."
Charlie smiled at him, though there wasn't much happiness in his expression.
Manfred reached for his husband's hand, clasping it firmly with his strong fingers, wanting to take at least some of the burden of his worry for their friend.
"You need to see Billy, 'Fi," Charlie stated firmly, getting directly to the point.
"What?" Fidelo blinked, obviously not having expected that at all. "Why? Isn't he really sick? I would think that visitors should be kept to a minimum."
"He doesn't have the flu, Fidelo," Charlie nearly growled, his dark eyes fierce as they fixed on him across the table. "He is sick because his magic levels are dangerously low. And his magic levels are dangerously low because he's been depressed and lonely for quite a while. We're not blaming you here, because somehow we didn't notice, either. But he's in love with you, Fidelo. He needs you to be with him, or he could very well die."
"He could.. die? He loves me? Charlie, I- I didn't know any of this.."
"Yes, he could die," Charlie repeated, his eyes softening now with his sadness at the thought. "But you know now. He needs your help, 'Fi. And he needs it soon."
"I understand, Charlie. I'll go directly after I finish eating. I won't be much use to him if I faint from hunger."
"I will get you the necessary excuses for you to skip the rest of your classes for today," Manfred told him with a nod.
"Thank you, Manfred."
The three of them ate in silence for a few moments before Charlie spoke again. "So, what's new with you, 'Fi?"
"Well, I just found out that I am the star of Billy Raven's romantic fantasies."
"Yes, Fidelo," Charlie said with a grin and a brief laugh. "I meant anything besides that."
"Um,.. no, not really. What about you and Manfred? What is new with you?"
"Well.."
"Yes?"
"I'm pregnant," Charlie replied, his lips curving up into a real smile then finally.
"What? You are pregnant?" Fidelo gasped, his eyes going wide and round with surprise, though not with shock strangely.
"Yes, I am."
"That's great news! I am happy for you both."
"Thank you, 'Fi," Charlie said with another brief grin. "You don't seem very shocked at all, though."
"Of course not, Charlie. Mother used to tell us all the old tales as bedtime stories. If I had known that you didn't realize what you were getting yourselves into, I would have told you. I am sorry."
"Why? We should have realized, anyway. Manfred's grandfather would never have wanted us to marry if there wasn't some way for us to continue both our Bloodlines that we would agree to."
Billy stirred from his light doze when a soft knock came at the door to his rooms, turning his head toward it slowly. "Come in.." he called out, his voice giving weak permission.
The door opened silently and Fidelo stuck his head in before entering quickly and shutting the door behind him.
"..Billy.." Fidelo spoke quietly, moving to the side of the bed, sitting on the edge of the mattress facing him and reaching out to take Billy's hands gently in both of his.
"Fidelo.." Billy whispered, his face unnaturally pale and clammy as he smiled sweetly up at him in greeting.
"Charlie told me what is happening to you, Billy. Why did you not tell me?"
"I- I did try, but.. It was like you never seemed to notice or have time for me. Most of the other boys do not, either. I know that some of it is that Manfred's grandfather adopted me. He is quite intimidating if you do not know him. And I know that I appear different on the outside, but my heart is the same as everyone's. The same as yours. I feel love, joy and pain. I love you, and I want to give myself to you forever, Fidelo. Will you accept me?"
"I will."
Billy's unnaturally pale lips parted then slightly, but before he could say anything in answer Fidelo was leaning over him.
He gasped softly in surprise when Fidelo's mouth took his, the contact warm and wet, soothing Billy's physical pain immediately as the older boy slid his hands beneath Billy to take him close into his arms.
Billy whimpered into their kiss, squirming instinctively while reaching up to tightly wrap his own arms around Fidelo, tugging him down so that their bodies were pressed flush together and his full weight rested on top of Billy.
"F-Fidelo!" Billy whispered when the kiss was reluctantly ended, his whole body quivering as he clung tightly to the comforting body above him.
"Billy!"
Fidelo startled him when he actually groaned, shivering again all over helplessly when his hands gently touched and caressed the slender planes of Billy's chest through his sleeping shirt.
"By the Red King, Billy! I want you! I have for a couple months now. I know that you're hurting, Billy.. but I want you so much!"
"It's okay, Fidelo," Billy promised him with an eager little smile and a quiet sigh. "I didn't know that you felt that way, but I'm so glad. And yes, I am in pain, but making love with you is the only way to heal me and take that pain away. It must be you, my love. You and only you."
"I understand," Fidelo replied softly, his eyes gentle with his emotions as he met Billy's gaze. "May I undress you, Billy?"
"Yes, please.." Billy agreed, his eyes obviously pleading with him. "But be gentle."
"Of course. Always."
Fidelo tenderly stripped Billy of his soft cotton nightgown before ridding himself of his own clothing and shoes and climbing into Billy's bed with him.
He moved his body back on top of Billy's, careful not to squash him, but Billy again reached for him and tugged firmly, pulling them back together fully.
"I am in pain, Fidelo," Billy murmured honestly while looking up into his eyes. "But you will not break me. You are the cure, my love, and so I need you to touch me completely. Do not hold back from me, please."
"Never. I promise."
Fidelo took his lips once more, claiming Billy's mouth as his own, his love and desire obvious as his hands roamed over Billy's warm, soft flesh tenderly.
Billy whimpered when Fidelo's mouth covered his again, his lips parting instinctively beneath Fidelo's and his body beginning to quiver with need as their tongues entwined together intimately.
"Unghh! Ahhh, Fidelo!" Billy moaned and cried out into his lover's kiss, clinging to him tightly with both arms and burying his fingers in his hair. "Please.."
"Billy.." Fidelo groaned and shuddered, kissing him harder for a moment before continuing, "Tell me. What do you need from me?"
"..Oil.." Billy whispered, their eyes meeting as he softly spoke. "There is oil in the bedside drawer there. Please, Fidelo. I need you. I need you in me! To be a part of me!"
"Yes. Always."
Fidelo opened the drawer, reaching in for the small bottle of purplish colored oil and bringing his hand back over the bed before opening it to slick the fingers of his right hand, smelling the lavender as it spilled over his skin, glancing down at Billy inquiringly.
"It's my favorite smell," he explained, looking embarrassed at the confession. "It's really the only memory I have of my mother. She always wore lavender, and used it on the seals of her letters, too."
Fidelo nodded, smiling as he set the bottle aside before taking gentle hold of Billy's right hip with his left hand, reaching between the younger boy's legs with his right hand to begin sliding one oily finger up inside him slowly and carefully.
Billy gasped softly in response, his bright red eyes wide as he moaned low, his hips squirming helplessly while he cried out his name with joy.
"Fi – Fidelo, I- Please, more! Need you!"
Fidelo shuddered in reaction to Billy's plea, nodding as he added a second finger, quickly followed by a third.
Billy cried out softly, trembling with pleasure as Fidelo gently stretched him open, slowly withdrawing his fingers before lining up their bodies and pushing his excited length inside the other man gradually.
The two of them clung tightly to each other, moving together in a private dance as old as time, their mouths joining in a hot, damp kiss.
"Fidelo!" Billy moaned into his mouth, panting heavily as he clutched at the strong shoulders of the other male. "Oh god, I love you!"
"I love you, too, Billy," Fidelo replied, holding him close in his arms as they both found release in unison.
Fidelo smiled, drawing Billy closer still impossibly, pressing numerous kisses over his sweaty face and damp hair tenderly while Billy trembled beneath his body with clear tiredness.
But life returned to his red eyes and his complexion improved immediately as he stared up at Fidelo.
Billy's gaze was adoring, peaceful, so Fidelo was bewildered when his lover's eyes filled with tears and he began to cry softly.
"..Billy? What is wrong? Have I hurt you, love?"
"No," Billy whispered, sighing as tears streamed down his cheeks slowly. "Never! I'm just so happy. I love you, Fidelo."
He smiled in reaction, kissing Billy's lips lightly. "I love you, too, Billy."