Asking Obvious Questions

I woke up. Sunlight streamed through the window. I looked at the clock, it was 8:00. Steven was still asleep, and I didn't want to wake him. But I couldn't exactly get up without that. Note to self: bring a book to bed tomorrow. I thought over the last few days. I looked over to Steven. And before I knew what was happening, I started to sing.

What if I never met you,

What if I never dropped that band?

What if- this symbol

What if it never appeared on my hand?

Today, I'd be sitting at home,

I would have no danger to my life.

I'd be another average kid,

I could cut off contact like butter and a hot knife

If I could, would I cut this bond

Would I?

That's a question.

If I could would I just go back?

Would I?

I don't know.

Sometimes I wish all this didn't happen,

Really.

That's my connfesion.

But I'm here now,

no what-ifs,

Nowhere to go.

(Not sung) You know, maybe that's okay.

(Tempo picks up)

My name is Constance, Connie for short

And I'm just fine with the current sit-uation.

Maybe my doubts are valid,

But I really doubt it,

Oh no! I'm trapped in permanent vacation.

If not for this, I'd be sitting at school,

Not even one friend, being bullied like, a tool.

Why would, I question, whether I, am happy,

No reason, for me to, get emotional and sappy

I'm here! And that's okay.

Even if these mood swings won't go away.

I'm here! I've danced with death!

It was more peaceful then I thought, like a deep deep breath.

And I'm here!

I'm here.

(Tempo slows)

My name is Constance, Connie for short.

And maybe this isn't perfect,

Maybe things could be better,

But I'm fine.

After a few seconds of silence, Steven said, "Connie, that was… beautiful."

My eyes darted towards him. "Oh! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to wake you."

"I don't care. I'm fine with waking up to that."

I blushed. "That was nothing, really. Just something off the top of my head."

"That can't be true. That was way too beautiful for that to be true. You had to have rehearsed that."

"Look, can we not talk about this? It's kind of embarrassing me."

"But it shouldn't be embarrassing you. What's so bad about having a pretty voice?"

"You couldn't understand. You're outgoing, and, well, you're you, and I'm me. Look, to be honest, if I could, I'd be walking away right now so I don't have to answer these questions, but that isn't exactly an option. That's easily the worst part of all of this." I looked at my palm. The image seemed slightly clearer, but not enough to make out anything.

"You really don't want to talk, huh?"

"Talk? Yes. Talk about my voice? No."

Steven looked at me for a few seconds. "You know, I actually might understand."

"Steven, just let it go. I'm okay, really. I just don't want to talk about it."

"No, it's not that. I just noticed. Remember when we were fused together? We could feel each other's emotions so clearly. But… I can still feel that now."

I thought about that. I felt outwards to see if I could as well. After a few seconds, lo and behold, I felt a wave of… I don't even know. But I could feel what Steven was feeling, a little apologetic, determined, some joyous subtext, and an ocean of other emotions beyond that. It was overwhelming. I pulled myself out of it. "Woah. Has that always been there, or is that new?"

"I think it's been there since we got our infinity bond thingy."

I thought back. I didn't really note it in these entries, but I remembered several times that I got a whiff of emotions that weren't my own. Maybe that's the source of my weird mood swings I've been noticing? "We need to talk to the gems about this," I said.

Steven nodded. We both got out of bed and got ready and all that jazz. I couldn't stop thinking about the emotional link. Was that the reason why my song changed direction halfway through? Can I even control my own emotions anymore? I was hoping Steven would forget about the song, but I had no such luck.

As I was brushing my teeth, Steven said, "I need to talk to you. Connie, I don't like this bond any more than you do, just saying that out front. But if I have it, there's no point in letting it go to waste. I know how you feel. You don't want to seem better than everybody else. Better yet, you don't want attention."

I spat out my toothpaste. "Steven, you don't get it. You want this to be instantly resolved and have us sing songs around a campfire. But I don't. Sure, I can sing, but that doesn't mean I want to. Call it stage fright, but I only sang to you because I thought no one was listening."

"We can talk about this…"

"Please Steven. For me, just let this one go."

Steven looked at me for a few seconds. "You're right. I guess it isn't really important. I just don't want that talent of yours to go to waste."

I smiled. "Thank you, Steven. For complimenting my singing and letting it go."

Steven smiled. "You're very welcome," he said

Pearl rubbed her face. "Can't the two of you go one night, heck, one hour without having something like this come up?"

Steven and I looked at each other. "No, ma'am." Steven and I said simultaneously. We giggled a bit at that.

"Oh, don't start with this whole 'talking at the same time' thing again. One problem at a time, please. So, you're telling me that this link no longer affects you physically, but emotionally as well?"

"No, it's more like it always affected us emotionally and we just noticed." Steven said.

"It would explain how they were able to fuse to easily," said Garnet.

"Yes, but still… this whole situation gets more and more complicated as it goes along. I want to know what's happening so we can prepare."

Amethyst chimed in. "Come on, Pearl. There's nothing we can do. I know you ain't great at it, but you could at least try to move with the flow."
"That's not an option," Pearl said. "Look, Amethyst, if these changes and revelations are going to keep happening, we need to be ready for it. If these two are some sort of confined empaths, we should see exactly how it manifests. We need to know how deep it runs, we need to know if it was connected to how they seemed to freeze time yesterday, we need to know everything. That's the only way we might be able to fix this someday."

Amethyst was getting a bit frustrated. "I thought we were saying this was effectively forever? Look, I don't care how 'prepared' we are, we'll never be prepared for what happens next. Could we have possibly imagined these two would have fused yesterday? What about the reading emotions thing, could we have seen that coming? What do you hope to accomplish by studying them? So that you can know them better? They should make their own decisions."

Pearl was taken aback. "Amethyst, now isn't the time to be arguing. Besides, we only said we were treating it like it was permanent for now. If I find something I can latch on to…"

"Yeah, but that's an if. Do you want to keep doing this every single time another new complication rises? How do you think they would feel about that?"

Steven was holding himself back. He wanted to step forwards, but for whatever reason, he didn't want to step in. Maybe he thought it wasn't his place? Either way, I had no such stopper, and when his emotions leached into me, I couldn't stop myself. "Aren't the two of you going to ask what we think? You're both just using us as pawns in your own arguments. Pearl, you're assuming we'd be okay with it without even asking. But you're even worse, Amethyst!" Steven held my hand. "You also just assumed what we thought without checking, and you even said it out loud! What if we were okay with staying together? You wouldn't know if you had just asked." I felt a tingle in my stomach and a flash of white, but I ignored it. My emotions amplified themselves. "Look, I hate to see the two of you fight. I really hate it, but I never have the strength to say anything. So if you're going to fight, find a better reason to. How about one of you end this and just ask whether we are okay with a few tests. It would be so easy. Come on, just ask."

We looked around, from Amethyst to Pearl. Neither of them said anything. They just looked shocked.

"Fine, I guess I'll ask. 'Hey, you two, are you okay with having a few tests done on you to try to figure out the source of all of this?' 'Sure, as long as they aren't too long.' There, problem solved. No argument. I am so sick of this," I said as we stormed out of the room.

As we walked out, I heard Amethyst say, "St- Conn-, Oh, just wait!"

Pearl said, "Stop!"

We slammed the door shut behind us.

It took us a good 15 seconds of walking down the boardwalk to notice Steven and I had been fused for the past 2 minutes or so.

I paused for a second, then kept walking. After we reached an area just outside of Funland, the local amusement park, I stopped. Finally, I said, "So who was that talking back there? I honestly don't know whose emotions I even have anymore."

Steven said, "I don't think it works that way. Didn't Garnet say to be a fusion we have to agree on stuff?"

"No, before then. I felt the strength of your want to yell at them, then I ended up voicing it. Because of your thoughts, I yelled at them."

"Well, I know you're confused at that, but I just want to thank you. I've wanted to say something like that for a long time."

"No, I'm glad I said it. I just want my thoughts to be my own."

A voice came from behind us. "I might be able to help you with that."

I turned. Garnet was standing there, right behind me. "Garnet!" We said.

"Hello. You know, what do you want me to call you? It would be kind of awkward if I always just said 'you two,' wouldn't it?

"Hmm…" A name, huh?

I heard Steven's thoughts. I wasn't too surprised at the fact that I could do so. Well, we're a fusion. How about a fusion between our two names? You're Connie, I'm Steven, so how about Conneven?

I don't know… wouldn't Stevonnie work better?

Yeah, you're probably right. The whole conversation took maybe a second.

"Stevonnie." We said, with a strong inflection to it.

"Well, Stevonnie, I couldn't help but overhear you talking about how you were having trouble differentiating your own emotions. I think I might be able to help you with that."

Steven was ready to believe it on ear, but I was a bit confused. "How do you know how to help with that?"

Garnet thought for a long moment. "I… can't tell you that."

We were confused. "Why not?"

"I'm sorry, but I can't tell you that, either."

"Is there anything you can tell us?" I said.

"Please, I know that it might seem suspicious, but I promise it will make sense in time. Do you trust me?"

"I trust you." Steven was speaking. "As long as you promise you'll tell us eventually."

Garnet let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you both. I promise, one day I'll be able to tell you. But for now, you two want to learn to keep your emotions separate, right?"

I wasn't quite ready to let it go, but Steven was eager. Because of the disconnect, the fusion started to weaken. Connie, this isn't worth it, Steven told me. And I knew Garnet isn't evil. I took a deep breath and let it go.

"I'm ready," we said.

"Good. Now it might seem counterintuitive, but the first step in separating your emotions is to open yourselves up. Let the emotions flow."

Neither one of us were very happy with that. "But what if we don't come back?"

"Don't worry. You trust me enough to keep a few secrets, you should trust me enough to open up a little. I promise it'll be okay."

I wished Steven was here to give me a reassuring look of confidence. I know he was there, but really there. I was a bit touched to realize Steven was thinking the same thing about me. Okay, Steven, here goes. I said. Then, I don't exactly know what I did. I just opened my heart and hoped for the best.

A rush of emotions came into me. Steven's emotions, and without much warning. I hadn't expected it to be so easy! Steven's thoughts started leeching inwards. Soon, I couldn't tell my thoughts from his. "Start simple," Garnet said, but I barely heard her. It was too late. The swirl of thoughts and feelings going on inside my brain began to consume me… us? We stopped being able to tell each other's thoughts apart. Steven saw my entire life flash before his eyes. He saw my parents' overprotectiveness, he saw school, he saw all the bullying I've had to endure, but the positives as well, our trip to Alaska, and the first time I went to a convention dressed as Lisa. Everything. Meanwhile, I saw his growing up, learning who he was, all the mistakes he's made, all the triumphs he's had. We clutched our head and sank to the ground. It was too much. We should've diffused by now, but even though we were both feeling extreme enough emotions to instantly cut the bond at any other time, we both carried the exact same extreme emotions and therefore it just kept us closer together. I felt trapped. Was I the one in the red shirt there? Haven't I always had this gemstone in my chest? No, aren't I the one carrying the book around? The one with the darker skin? I… I…

Then, the swirl of emotions stopped. I was still Connie. I remembered that now. But I understood Steven so much more. And in a way, I was Steven as well. I felt his feelings towards all the gems, I felt him feeling all my emotions as well. It was so strange. We weren't two people, but we weren't really one person, either.

"St-Stevonnie?" Garnet said.

I unfurled my limbs and smiled. "I'm okay. I didn't expect that." Suddenly I was no longer fighting with Steven for control. We seemed to agree on everything.

"I- I didn't see that coming. What just happened?" Garnet seemed baffled.

"Of course you didn't. When you learned it, it probably went a lot smoother. It didn't exactly go that way for me. But I'm okay. We're okay."

"You're totally different than what you were like just a few minutes ago."

"Really? How so?"

"Earlier, it was like the two of you were, I don't know, fighting for control? It was more like you were sharing your body than a real fusion. Now you're more like a traditional fusion, your own personality and everything. I've never seen anything like it in my life…"

"Well, that's nothing new, is it? Isn't our whole situation nothing like you've ever seen before?" I said.

"Yes, but- let's just say it's complicated."

I decided to not pursue that line of thinking. If she wanted to tell us, she would. "So, we've opened up to each other. What now? It would be kind of pointless if we didn't end up doing what we came here to do."

"It wasn't supposed to work like this. I meant open up to each other as in listen to each other's emotions, not meld your minds together!"

"Oh. Well, it's a bit late for that."

"I noticed."

I twiddled my thumbs. "We could diffuse if you want."

Garnet eyed me. "Only if you want to… I don't want to make you do something you don't want to do."

I thought about it. In this form, I felt so… amazing! I had all of Steven's kindness, as well as Connie's confidence. I had Steven's never-give-up attitude and Connie's fighting spirit. Could there even be a reason to split up? But as I thought about it, maybe the answer was yes. I remembered what the gems said yesterday through two sets of ears, two sets of emotional reactions. Fusion could get addicting. Even if it felt so good, I could fuse again at any time, right? And Connie really wanted to be separate before all of this, right? How could we do that if we stayed fused like this?

"I'm okay with splitting up. I can always fuse again if I want to, right? It's not like anyone could really stop me."

Garnet relaxed. "Thank goodness. You're making a good choice, Stevonnie."

"I just have… one problem. How exactly do I diffuse in the first place?"

Garnet shook her head. "Have you tried? I told you, fusion only lasts as long you want it to."

"Okay." I concentrated. I remembered the two halves of me: Connie and Steven. One, a happy goofball, not a mean bone in his body. Can find something good to say in just about any situation. Another, a girl who's just about the best thing ever but is unwilling to believe it. I knew we were starting to split up, because that sure isn't how I would describe myself. I felt a small pain as Steven's personality began to split from my own. Finally, the fusion destabilized, but it was slow. We were left simply standing next to each other, holding hands.

I looked Steven in the eye. "Wow. That was just… wow," I said.

"Yeah," he said. We stood for a while, looking each other in the eye.

I realized we were holding hands. "Oh, sorry." I said. I let go.

"No, it's okay. I liked it." He said. He grabbed my hand back.

I cleared my throat. "So, I guess we should see if there's still the problem of mixing thoughts and such."

"Yeah, right." He let go of my hand.

I looked around. "Hey, where'd Garnet go?"

The two of us looked around us, and sure enough, she had disappeared. "Who knows. Garnet's weird," Steven said.

"We can do it without her. So, could you, like, send over a thought wave, a strong one, and see if I can differentiate it or something?"

"That sounds like it wouldn't work too well. Isn't the problem when you couldn't see it coming?"

"Just try it, okay? I'm raring to see if it worked. I just have a gut feeling, you know? I don't think we'd be put through all of that just to have nothing come out of it. Besides that incredible feeling, of course."

"Fine, here we go."

I did feel a rush of Steven's emotion. But after seeing everything behind his motives, his entire heart, what used to be a confusing mess came off as almost music in my mind. I laughed. "Oh my god, a problem was solved after it was introduced into our lives. It's a miracle!"

"Didn't you say that about fusion?"

"Yeah, but that only lasted a few seconds, it doesn't count. This, it lasted a few hours! That's progress!"

"Sure Connie. Progress," he said, laughing.

"Does this mean my random mood swings will go away?" I said.

"Who knows. I sure don't. Again, with our luck, anything is possible."

"Let's go up to the temple. I'm sure Garnet's waiting back there. She'll be overjoyed to hear the good news!"

"Yeah. I'm glad Garnet was here. She helped a whole lot. She's the best."

"Well then we'd better thank her in person! I'll race you there!"

You'd think I would have learned from the last time I said that. Instead, I got about 3 feet out, then got a face full of wood. "You know, this hurt a lot less in the sand…"

We got back. Garnet had already filled the other two in on what had happened, so we just had to fill everyone in on the rest. Once that was all over with, though, Pearl and Amethyst felt it was necessary to apologize for arguing over us earlier. Honestly, I had sort of forgotten about all of that. And they didn't seem to think a simple apology would do…

"Connie, Steven, we're both really sorry. We didn't mean you to get so angry you would fuse over it." Pearl said.

"Look, it's fine…" I tried to say.

"No, really. We shouldn't have fought over you like that, it really was just an excuse to fight each other. Which is why… Pearl and I had an idea." Amethyst said.

Pearl nodded. "To show that we both really mean it, well… we'll show you."

I didn't bother interrupting again. I let them put on whatever display they felt like putting on. The two of them stood across from each other. They bowed. Then, out of nowhere, they started dancing. Pearl danced exactly like I thought she would, like a ballerina, nothing but grace and style. Amethyst kind of danced like I thought she would as well, no real style at all. Not that I ever expected Amethyst to ever dance.

I laughed. "What are you two doing?"

They didn't answer. As their dance finished, they moved closer and closer. Pearl spun into Amethyst, and the moment they touched, white light enveloped them. The second before it happened, I realized what was going on. A huge gem I had never seen before burst forth from the whiteness, and it smiled at us. "It seems that Pearl and Amethyst decided to call upon me, huh? It's not often they'd do such a thing in a non-combat situation."

Steven was hyperventilating. "Oh my god. This is so cool." I am so glad we learned to tell each other's emotions apart. If it were earlier, I would definitely be freaking out as well. But I could keep my own opinion of 'cool, but not get sick from hyperventilation cool' separate from his.

The gem smiled at the two of us. "All I wanted to say was, I'm sorry for putting you through all of that earlier. Although I'm not totally sure why we had to do all of this to get that far. Something like a 'show of faith' that they both really cared about you? Well, Amethyst really wants out now already, so I guess I must say toodles for now. But remember, if you ever need the best archer around, just call good 'ol Opal." With that, the two of them split apart, less gracefully than the two of us did.

I burst out laughing. "You know, I would have accepted your apology anyways. No need for this whole show.

Pearl blushed a little. "Oh? I thought it was relevant and everything, and it would really prove to you that we meant it."

"In the future, just fyi, I already know you two are good gems and you don't mean it when you say something mean." I glanced over at Steven and he was still hyperventilating. "Him, on the other hand…"

"Oh, he'll be fine." Amethyst said. I laughed at that, and Amethyst did as well.

Pearl was a bit confused. "I don't get it, what's so funny?"

After that, nothing much interesting happened. The short tests Pearl did, we didn't get much from, and we didn't have any time to train today. We did get to go the fair, though! The teacups ride was a real highlight for me. Normally it would be a super kiddy ride, but it was super cool in this case. Steven nearly threw up, but through some mental help through the infinity bond, he held on. There were a few adventures in trying to use a public restroom that I definitely won't go over here. Then we went home and got to bed. I wish I had some huge cliffhanger to end this off with, but we're fine. The end of the day was actually pretty uneventful, and we got to bed at a decent hour, for once. All in all, a pretty decent day. So instead I jinx you with this: things seem to be on the up!

A/N: Sorry about all of the lines in the song, that was to only way I could get Fanfiction to recognize stanzas. I'm kinda new to Fanfiction, so I don't know how everything works yet.

Thank you to everyone who has favorited, followed, or posted a review on this story. Next time: we visit the next cannon episode: Serious Steven. But you know me, it sure ain't going the same direction as in the show. Or is it? Honestly, I don't know, I'm just making this up as I go. I started this chapter by saying to myself, 'huh, Pearl and Amethyst argued a lot early on. I should have them argue,' and it turned into this. You don't know what's coming next, and neither do I. That's what makes it fun! See y'all tomorrow with that.