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Notes: This chapter starts using some "crude" but inevitable words. It's coming to the point they are necessary, but I don't plan to make the upcoming chapters too intense yet, sex-wise I mean.

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The epitome of my shame

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Drink? As in alcoholic drink? Well... it's been such a long time I don't have anything, I guess just a beer would be okay...

"Oh, Yes Grimmjow, please... I would like a beer if you have it." Ichigo asked with both politeness and a faint fear of getting high enough to do things that... well he didn't want to think about that, that's why he asked for beer, it's weak and safe as he had already had it before.

Grimmjow smirked and massaged Ichigo's shoulder softly, which sent a chill through the boy's body leading into a sudden shudder of his shoulders followed by a moan he quickly muffled with a clench of his throat.

Why am I feeling this? What would Grimmjow think of me if I let that moan out? What's with his touch to make that to me?

"Beer? Sorry we don't have that... But we do have vodka cocktails or whisky if you like it. Don't be so tense, just don't overdo it. Everything in life can be enjoyable in moderation" Grimmjow smiled as he slipped his hand to grab Ichigo's and conduced the boy, to which he didn't try to resist at all. Still dazed in thoughts, Ichigo followed Grimmjow to the bar.

Ichigo's trance was broken as Grimmjow pressed his hand softly. The boy looked at Grimmjow's blue eyes in fright as he noticed the man leaning against a bar counter where a bottle of vodka along with some sugar, strawberries and ice laid.

"Hey, are you ok, Ichigo?" Grimmjow asked slightly worried with the boy's spacing out.

"Sorry Grimmjow, I-I just remembered I had to... feed my cat, but my sisters are there so it's ok!" Lucky of Ichigo that Grimmjow didn't know he didn't have a cat. Ichigo smiled apprehensively, trying not to let Grimmjow know he was lost in thoughts because of him.

"I am impressed with your sense of responsibility, that's great. So... I will prepare one cocktail for you, tell me if you like it, ok?" Grimmjow turned to the counter and started mashing the strawberries with sugar in a shaker and finally adding the vodka and the ice. Ichigo's eyes were caught by the clenching of Grimmjow's arm muscles as he shook the metallic recipient vigorously, sending some water drops flying from his wet hand to his biceps, then dripping down to his armpit. Ichigo's gaze followed them in awe as a sip of drool escaped his mouth.

"It's ready! Wow you look really excited to try it!" Grimmjow laughed at Ichigo's face, while pouring the liquid in a glass, as the boy came back to his senses and wiped his drool before Grimmjow could notice.

"Thanks Grimmjow, let me taste it" Ichigo took the glass from Grimmjow's hand and gulped a large portion of it, inevitably leading him to choke, as the drink ran through his throat, and to bend his body in coughs.

"Don't be so eager! You have to drink it slowly! Well I have to talk to Hisagi now, why don't you go chat with the other guests and make some friends?" Grimmjow smiled at Ichigo's rashness as he tapped the boy's back trying to help him stop the choking.

"Th-Thanks Grimmjow, I'll remember that... I guess I will talk to Toushirou... He seems friendly." Ichigo was about to make his way towards the yard where the other guests, including Toushirou, were, when Grimmjow called him one last time.

"Listen Ichigo, I am very fond of Toushirou as he is my dear cousin... But don't be naive, he can be quite annoying sometimes. If you think he's being to pushy or making you feel uncomfortable tell me immediately, ok?" Grimmjow left after a friendly wink. Ichigo placed the cocktail on the counter and stared thoughtfully through the window.

Well... I can say he's got some odd quirks, but I don't think he's a bad guy... He's... kind of cute... for a man. I am sure he didn't mean to do anything strange, he was just being affectionate. Friend's affection, that is!

Ichigo insisted on fooling himself in every way possible while walking towards the yard. It was a beautiful night, the cloudless sky allowed the moon to shine brightly, the cold breeze hitting Ichigo's cheeks made them tingle with little chills. Just before him, across a small garden, Toushirou was sat along with Rukia and Nanao, chatting vividly, unintentionally exposing his hair's whiteness to blacken the moon's and his eyes' greenness to pale the grass's.

With a slight turn of head and a tiny smile, Toushirou threw an inviting wink at Ichigo, whose heart began to race on the wonders of what could that mean and on the anxiety of getting there as fast as possible to discover.

Ichigo's steps were unsure, his hands hidden in his pockets were moderately sweaty, his head was slightly facing away from the direction he was walking to as if trying to hide his eyes.

"Sit here, Ichigo!" As Ichigo stood before Toushirou, the white-haired boy smiled warmly, slid sideways away from the two girls and tapped the free space beside him on the bench, showing Ichigo where to sit: opposite to the girls.

As Ichigo sat down, he calmly laid his back against the bench's back, extended his legs a bit spread. With his hands still in his pocket, Ichigo looked at Toushirou's content face.

Well, he's really enjoyable to be with. Very... kind... of him to not let me feel left out.

"Cold, isn't it?" the white haired boy smiled while staring at Ichigo's hands buried in his pockets.

"Yeah, kinda... Tou-..." Ichigo suddenly stopped what he was about to say as he felt a strange cold hand enter his pocket, gently covering his in a tender grip.

"Yeah?" The boy tightened his grip inside Ichigo's pocket and looked eagerly at his face.

Hold on, Ichigo... this is awkward, but he must be cold too... Even though he's got pockets too, I think he's holding my hand for the human heat... No doubt it's getting warmer down there...

Ichigo blushed when he felt his cock bulging against his pants, a few inches away from Toushirou's hand.

Damn it! What is he going to think of me? I am not a pervert! No... this will spoil my chances of being his friend!

"T-Toushirou... Wait, I've got to..." Ichigo tried to stand up as fast as he could but he was pulled back by Toushirou grabbing his waist.

"What happened, Ichigo?" Toushirou asked with a cynical smile which Ichigo read as innocence, thinking the boy didn't notice his erection.

"Uh... I have to go inside... it's too cold out here... Come with me" Ichigo was worried Toushirou would think he was running away, so he decided to invite him inside hoping his bulge would go off during the walk. The content smile in Toushirou's face was a relief to him, but his peace didn't last long as the white-haired boy immediately hugged his waist.

"I'm freezing here too... let's warm up." Ichigo could feel his erection leap, making a mighty bulge on his pants. Ichigo contorted, bent forward, marched, did everything he could to hide it, but it was of no use.

"What's happening?" Toushirou asked while muffling his laughter.

Oh no! He's gonna notice it! I need to keep some distance... but I don't want him to think I am rejecting his company, after all he did to approach me... it would be cruel!

"I-I am just too cold I am shuddering! Meet me inside!" It wasn't even that cold, but Ichigo couldn't think of anything else. He broke free from Toushirou's grip and ran towards the house.

Inside, Ichigo was desperate to rid himself from his erection.

Oh my god... How can I make it go down? Maybe a cold drink would solve it? I'll give it a try...

Ichigo took careful sips of the cocktail he left behind, reminding himself of Grimmjow's advice. However, the boy had only drank beer so far, he had no idea of how stronger vodka were. He was fine, still.

"Wow you were really in a hurry!" Said Toushirou entering the room while Ichigo drank the last drops of his strawberry cocktail.

"Well, I am much better now!" Ichigo threw him a goofy smile with a soft blush on his cheeks.

Ichigo suddenly felt a faint grumbling in his stomach, it was nothing bad, just some gases, so he thought.

"Anyway, let's sit somewhere, I wanted to talk to you..." Ichigo invited smilingly.

Toushirou smirked maliciously satisfied and took Ichigo by his hand.

"Where are we going to Toushirou?" Ichigo's face flushed as his hand as held and asked shyly.

"You are getting soft all of a sudden... What happened?" Toushirou stopped and stared at Ichigo's rosy face.

"I-I think I've drank too much... sorry..." Ichigo mumbled looking down as Toushirou grinned mischievously and resumed moving, but at a faster pace.

"To my room. We are going to my room, it's hotter there" Ichigo's judgement wasn't the best at this moment, so he easily agreed it was warmer in Toushirou's room.

As they were climbing up the stairs, Ichigo felt his belly grumble again and an increasing pressure made his ass loosen a bit.

Damn! Why is it happening now? I've hardly eaten at all... I... need... a... toilet...

"T-Toushirou... the toilet... please..." Ichigo halted his movement, barely able to stand. Toushirou rushed to grab him, despite the effort needed to lift a taller man, and took him to his suite's bathroom.

With a devious smile on his face he looked at Ichigo's suffering face, which showed a mix of fear, shame, discomfort and excitement.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of you tonight, make sure you expel everything... I want you clean... when you are done, take a shower. I will be waiting for you" Toushirou said while releasing Ichigo and helping him reach the toilet bowl.

"Thanks... Toushirou... for taking care of me... Sorry for the trouble" Ichigo was muffling his cry of shame despite his eyes releasing some tears.

The white haired boy laughed maliciously at the scene, Ichigo's face crying in shame before him and clinging to his forgiveness was arousing. Toushirou stared at the boy's despair with struggling to undress his pretty outfit. The revealing of Ichigo's naked torso after stripping his shirt was turning on, Toushirou could feel his erection coming and so Ichigo, who looked at that bulge both confused and curious.

Ichigo quickly curved his back to reach for his shoes and started undoing the lace, as Toushirou approached him and patted his head.

"Don't take too long..." Ichigo could only hear Toushirou's calm and serious voice and, as he lifted his eyes from the floor, he could see the bulge throbbing on the boy's pants.

As the white haired boy left, Ichigo sat at the bowl in relief.

Toushirou... what... are you doing to me? Are you embarrassed too? Sorry for making you feel like that in front of a guy... I am really terrible... a pervert... filthy...

Ichigo broke in tears of shame and guilt as he released the first puddle of dump down along with a scream of relief.