Hello, Minna-san! Thank you for the supportive reviews! You know, my life's been a living hell the past few days. I decided that I won't go back to University (who needs to be a Psychologist anyway?). I'll have to study all year to get into another University (one paid by the government, but it's very hard to get in). It will take a lot of work, but it will pay off, because I'll be studying something I like (not that I didn't like Psychology... That's it. I'm crazy).

Disclaimer: Kenshin is sitting on Hana-chan's room. He has a sad look on his face.
Hana-chan: "What's wrong?"
Kenshin: "Everything. You got me food poisoning, your brother left and you quitted University."
Hana-chan: "I didn't know you would get this upset about all these things. I mean, you not even liked my brother that much. He calls you gay, have you forgotten?"
Kenshin: "He didn't mean it."
Hana-chan: "Yes, he did!"
Kenshin: "But he gave me jelly." [A.N.: Read my disclaimers from 'Kamiya Dojo's Mystery' for explanations.]
Hana-chan: "You miss jelly? I'll make you jelly."
Kenshin: "But that won't make me feel better."
Hana-chan: "Why not?"
Kenshin: "You quitted University... You will have a lot of free time on your hands... And you say what you love the most to do on your free time is torture me."
Hana-chan grins: "Yeah!"
Hana-chan starts dancing on her room, and pointing at Kenshin with her mocking "you are in trouble" look.
Kenshin gulps. This is not his lucky day. So, Hana-chan doesn't own Rurouni Kenshin. She tried to buy it, but the salesman fooled her and she got a manga volume instead.
By the way! This story is edited by my good friend Kayjuli, who is the best damn writer I've ever read and ever known!

This chapter is dedicated to Bao Blossom (for cheering me up talking about... Bugs? Don't ask. Bao knows what it means) and to Zosocrowe (you should all thank her! It was her idea that brought Sano back!). Thank you very much.

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"Dialogs"
'Thoughts'
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Kaoru wants a baby

A man chewing a fish bone stopped in front of the Kamiya dojo's gate. It had been a long time since he had last been there. Things looked exactly like old times. He was happy about seeing his friends again.

The man opened the gate and found the front yard very different from what he used to see it. Yahiko was picking up water on the well, while Misao kept sweeping the same spot on the porch endlessly. Aoshi seemed like a stone statue, probably meditating. What was really unusual was the look they all had on their faces.

Yahiko seemed disgusted. Misao seemed distant. Aoshi's eyes seemed... Sad? Guilty? 'Now this is weird. Emotionless Aoshi showing a bit of emotion? And why are they here? Maybe something happened.' The man thought.

"Sano!" Yahiko yelled, running towards him and dropping the water bucket on the way. Misao and Aoshi just looked at the newcomer.

"Hey, kid. What happened here?" Sano asked.

"It's Kenshin..." Yahiko began.

"What?" Sano dropped his bag and ran inside the house. 'If something happened to Kenshin, Jou-chan would be crushed.'

Sano slid the shouji door open with a strong tug. Nothing could prepare him for what he saw inside. Kenshin was crouching beside a bucket, obviously in pain. Kaoru was holding his hair, while trying to disguise the look of disgust on her face.

"Are you done?" Kaoru asked.

"For now..." Kenshin replied.

"Good." Kaoru said, pushing Kenshin aside and taking his place.

Sano closed his eyes and put a hand in front of his nose, hearing to Kaoru's sickening noises. After Kaoru was done...

"Yahiko!!!" She called, just then glancing at the door and noticing Sano. "Sano! Look, Kenshin! Sano is here!"

Kenshin was lying by his side, holding his stomach he just lifted his head to look at his friend.

"Sano... Sessha apologizes for not getting up to greet you..." Kenshin said with a pained look on his face.

"What happened to you?" Sano asked in concern.

"Bad fish." Kenshin managed to say. ´Kaoru is already feeling too guilty about this. Better put the blame on the fish Aoshi caught.'

"Are you sure it's not Jou-chan cooking?" Sano laughed.

"Do you want me to hit you on the head?" Kaoru jumped to her feet.

"Chill out, Jou-chan. Aren't you sick?"

"No. Kenshin is sick... I just can't look at someone throwing up without..." Kaoru twisted her nose.

"I get the idea." Sano interrupted her.

Yahiko got to the room.

"Another bucket?" Yahiko said, picking up the bucket "Are you planning on stop getting sick soon? I wanted to go to the Akabeko..."

"Sessha is sorry..." Kenshin said. "But sessha can't eat anything without getting sick again."

"Megumi said you will be fine once your stomach settles. Maybe tomorrow." Kaoru said, brushing Kenshin's bangs away from his eyes.

Yahiko gave them his famous "get a room" look. Then he took the (urgh) bucket away.

'It looks like the two got together while I was away.' Sano thought.

"Sorry for putting you into so much trouble, Kaoru-dono..." Kenshin said.

'Huh? Dono? I guess not.' Sano shook his head in discontentment.

"Kenshin no baka! It isn't trouble at all." Kaoru replied sweetly. "Sano, could you help me taking this baka to bed?"

Sano helped Kenshin up and walked him to his futon. 'Two futons... So, they are together.' Sano finally concluded.

"I'll get you some of that tea Megumi prescribed. Sano, could you please keep him company?" Kaoru asked.

"Sure, Jou-chan. We have a lot of catching up to do."

Kaoru left the room, leaving the two men alone.

"So... You and Jou-chan, huh? I'm very happy for you guys. When did you tie the knot?" Sano asked.

"Kaoru-dono and I got married six months ago."

"That much? Why isn't she pregnant yet?"

"Oro! You too? What is this? A conspiracy? Or am I just delusional from a fever... Maybe you are not even here..." Kenshin tried his forehead with his hand. "No. Sessha doesn't seem to have a fever..."

"What am I missing?" Sano scratched his head.

"You see, Kaoru-dono is asking herself the same thing... And she really wants to have a baby now, while I think it's better to wait."

"Wait for what?"

"Huh?"

"Get her pregnant already! I want to be an uncle before I die!" Sano blurted.

"Mind your own business de gozaru!"

"What? Do I have to explain to you the facts of life? Women want to have children! That's what they are born for!" [Author's note: I know... Sano is a sexist pig... Or at least the sexiest pig I ever saw... Mmm]

"Oro! Don't get Kaoru-dono listen to you talking like that! You would be dead! She is very moody lately!" Kenshin seemed terrified.

"Jou-chan doesn't scare me. She's always been like that."

"Like what?" Kaoru asked, she was carrying tray with a teapot and cups over it.

Sano looked at the teapot... It seemed very, very, very hot.

"You've always been this beautiful, Jou-chan." Sano gave her a bright smile.

Kaoru blushed.

"Don't make passes on my wife!" Kenshin meant to get up, but he was too weak and fell back into the futon.

"Sano, could you wait outside?" Kaoru put the tray on the floor and shoved Sano out of the room. "Now you drink this, Kenshin. It will make the pain go away." Kaoru said, helping him up to drink the cup of tea.

'She really will be a great mother someday... Sessha is so unworthy of her...' Kenshin thought, as he drank the tea.

"This tea makes me sleepy..." Kenshin said, closing his eyes.

"I know." Kaoru replied, brushing his hair with her fingers.

'Why not? She is ready for this... I'm too old to not be ready. We should have a baby. Let's...' Kenshin drifted to sleep.

Kaoru watched his peaceful sleeping face, before letting out a loud sigh and waking out of the room. Sano was outside the room, but he had fetched his bag.

"I've brought you something, Jou-chan." He said.

Kaoru looked at him with curiosity. 'Knowing Sano, he must have brought me something completely useless... Or something that he liked, which would turn out the same, because I'd hate it.'

Sano reached for something inside his big bag and took out a box of chocolates. Kaoru had stars on her eyes.

"Thank you!" She said, opening the box and tasting a small bonbon.

"And I think I'll let you borrow this..." Sano took out a package and began unwrapping it, until Kaoru was face to face with the ugliest - to not say scariest - statue she had ever seen. It was a statue of a head, with red eyes and pointy teeth.

"I bought this when I was in Africa..." Sano explained. "It's supposed to make a person's wish come true."

"How does it work?" Kaoru asked holding the statue carefully.

"You make your wish, and put this on your room so you can look at it at night, before you close your eyes to sleep. When you sleep, the gods will make your wish come true..."

"Does it work?" Kaoru was suspicious.

"Of course it does! Just like corn can make a wart disappear!" Sano replied. [A.N.: The corn thing is a Brazilian superstition. I had a nanny when I was a kid, that had grown up on a farm and she told me that they used to rub the corn on the wart. Then they fed the chicken with the corn. Supposedly, it would make the wart disappear.]

"Corn doesn't make warts disappear!" Kaoru blurted.

"Of course it does!"

"No, it doesn't! But maybe this ugly thing can work. How long it's supposed to take to make my wish come true?" Kaoru asked.

"I'd say not long... Not with your wish, anyway..."

"How do you know what my wish would be?"

"Kenshin told me."

"Really? What did you told him?"

"Get her pregnant already! Actually, I was hoping that by now you and Kenshin would already have a little kid... But Kenshin is really slow... So, you better take all the help you can get, right? I'm sure everybody is cheering for you."

"Thank you, Sano. You are the greatest! How can I repay you?"

"Actually, I need a place to stay while I'm in Japan..."

***

Kenshin woke up in the middle of the night. He was feeling much better. Kaoru was sleeping soundly by his side. Kenshin sighed. 'She is just so beautiful. I can't believe that she loves me... I promise I'll make you happy for as long as I live.'

In need for her warmth, Kenshin moved closer to her. When he finally made himself cozy, there was that feeling of being watched. His eyes scanned the room and met those strange red eyes. "AAAAHHHHH!" Kenshin let out a weird growl.

"Huh?" Kaoru woke up from his scream. "Are you okay, Kenshin?"

"I'm not sure... I think I'm delusional..."

"Why?"

"I'm seeing a strange face with red eyes..." Kenshin said, poiting at the statue.

"That's Sano's present."

"It's ugly." Kenshin said, like he was a small child. "I'm afraid of it. Can we turn it around? Lose it? Accidentally break it? It looks alive... Maybe I could kill it with the Sakabattou... Please?"

"Do you have a fever again?" Kaoru asked, placing a hand on his forehead.

"I don't want to be on the same room as that thing!" Kenshin got up and walked from the room, wobbling like a drunk man.

"Mou! How am I suppose to get pregnant if my husband keeps running away from our room?"

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Reviewers are such nice people... I really love reviewers... They make me feel so good... ^x^
So, here it goes:

Prudence-chan: Sorry for making your beloved Sano to sound like a pig... (my editor said that she wanted to hit him on the head for that). O peixe não era venenoso... A culpa foi mesmo da comida da Kaoru!

Mara: Really? Learning German is really that hard? I don't know, for some reason I had this idea that German was somewhat like English, only it sounded funny. But now I remember that there is even a letter that doesn't exist on my alphabet... Yeah... It must be harder than I thought.

Crystal Okamino and SMDSP: Thanks for your concern... Actually, I feel much better now that I decided to quit the University. And my brother is always online, so I really don't miss him that much... You know, he is a pain sometimes, but I love him.