[I just started working at a new job, so I do not know how often I will be able to update. I will try to update as much as possible! Thank you so much. I appreciate any input you have on my story.]

"You want me to do what?" I asked, completely caught off guard with the commander's request.

"We know you're Carrie Zackly, the adopted daughter of the Commander in Chief." Erwin said. Of course he did, if he didn't know then he wouldn't be the man I thought he was. "Why you hid that from us doesn't matter. Instead of going on the next expedition, we need you to help gather information."

"And that involves spying on my father? Do you expect him to be guilty of something?"

"Is he guilty of something?" The thing about Commander Erwin, he was full of secrets, and, from what I've observed over the years, he has a way of finding everyone else's secrets. Although, it would be hard for people to turn against him because he is well respected. If I were to ever go against anyone in the military, whether it be terms of skill, public opinion, or knowledge he would be a tough opponent. I just wonder how much he knew about my father, I just couldn't be the one to share what information I had.

"How does this help the Survey Corps with their mission? I thought we were researching Titans, not acting as spies on our own people."

"You've never been suspicious of our lack of Knowledge? According to our History the Titans come out of nowhere. Why do you think it's recorded like that?"

Then I realized. He knows a lot more about me than I thought. "Why would I know something like that?" When the higher ups were first teaching us about Titans I had asked one of them to fill the holes in history… they told me to not speak of it again if I wanted to continue working as a soldier. Someone had told Erwin about this…

"If you don't trust me now, I understand. I don't necessarily need you to trust me with your thoughts, but I know you want to know the truth. This is how we will get closer to it."

"Can I safely assume that I am not going to be protected if I get caught? That this is a life and death situation for me?"

"I can't guarantee your safety, just like when we go beyond the walls. The only difference is you'll be completely alone."

"I guess I have no choice." I sighed.

"There's always a choice, just don't regret it later. We'll go into further detail tomorrow. For now, you're dismissed."

I saluted him and left his office.

How am I supposed to know who to trust in times like these. I knew from an early age that you can never fully trust people. In some ways we are all strangers, even the people we know could be hiding the most important details.

Then I saw the man I have been avoiding for the past few days across the hall. Ever since I tried to kiss him, I've felt embarrassed. Can I trust Levi? He saved my life, but that doesn't mean he deserves my complete faith. Every time we talk, something triggers. Memories start flowing, and I've replayed them so many times it almost seems unreal.

So when I avoid Levi, I don't have to remember. But the memories are problems I've been dealing with my whole life, the other problems I'm having are hard to avoid after a certain period of time. Levi became my prime concern. It wasn't Titans or being a spy for Erwin… it was him. I almost kissed him and he wouldn't give me a straight answer if he was going to kiss me that night. The more I thought about it, the more ridiculous it seemed. Why would someone out ranking me be interested in me.

If only all things could be reasonably solved with ignorance and two blades. But all my problems aren't Titans and memories anymore.

"Come with me." Levi said.

Why was I following him? Is this all just pure curiosity? I need to stop… but I need to know.

He lead me to a secluded area away from the barracks, but not too far from our headquarters.

Levi stood there in the moonlight. Usually he always looks angry or tired, but he actually seemed more relaxed. I don't know how I could tell, even if his face naturally made him look pissed off.

"Have you been avoiding me?" Levi said, he also looked slightly ominous with his naturally angry eyes slightly showing in the moon light.

I put my head down. "Don't be ridiculous, I've been training… you know that." But it was true. I couldn't be around Levi without thinking I was going to do something I regret. Especially being alone with him, like I was right now.

He stepped closer to me, and even after I stepped back he would walk closer. I kept walking till my back hit the wall. He put his hand against the wall and I could look directly in his eyes. His eyes always looked so empty, like he was trying to feel nothing, but he also feels as if he doesn't have anything. I was completely surrounded by him, taking in all the details and analyzing everything about him.

"Don't be dumb, I know you're trying hard to hide the fact that you like this."

He was reading me wasn't he? I'm just a book carelessly left open on a table thinking no one would come by to read me. But there's Levi Ackerman, completely interested in the contents.

"Shut up… you don't know what I like. Besides isn't this bad for you? You shouldn't be seen with anyone lower ranking than you." I said trying to restrain myself from yelling.

He moved closer to me and put a hand on my shoulder. "Does it look like I care?" His voice struck me, paralyzing me in an addictive mixture of seduction and… I didn't even know at the time. I was trying to fight the feeling off, but I could feel that this is something Levi had been wanting for a while. "Do you want to kiss me?" his hand moved up to my chin. He was more than just a brutal Titan killer… more than the trusted and strong soldier. At least at this moment he was. I was seeing more of him than anyone has ever seen.

I tried avoiding his eyes. "Stop teasing me…This is all just a big joke to you isn't? You're trying to humiliate me."

And then he actually smirked. "Why would I do that?" Then, he kissed me. It took me a while to notice that our lips were touching because it was so unexpected. I expected it to be forced and tough, but it was actually gentle and breath-taking. What was he doing to me? Even if I was completely entranced by him, my body still tensed up. "Relax… just trust me." Then he kissed me again, and I actually kissed him back.