Disclaimer: I do not own Sekaiichi Hatsukoi, all rights belong to Shungiku Nakamura.

Thank you to dendodge for betaing.

Thanks to Miss Mysty, damons-hot-as-hell, mochiusagi, and crobhdearg for reviewing! Thanks for all the story alerts and favourites!

Enjoy!

Chapter 4

Birds chirped cheerfully outside as the sun rose on a peaceful January morning. Cars drove past as people commuted to work, as if it were an ordinary day. However, when Kisa Shouta awoke beside a stranger he knew instantly what he had done.

The man stirred and rolled over, and Kisa's horror intensified. He found himself naked and in bed with his ex.

Ichimura had a goofy smile on his face. "Mmm, morning Shouta."

"Ichimura… How…" Kisa said, pulling the sheet away from the man beside him and gathering it around his waist. "We didn't…"

"Oh, but we did, Shouta," Ichimura confirmed, not even perturbed by Kisa pulling the sheet off his naked body. "And it was fantastic."

Kisa felt weak at knees, how could he have been stupid enough to do something so awful? "Just get out, Ichimura. I don't want to see you again."

"After that performance, I don't think so." Ichimura got up and grabbed Kisa's wrist. "I rocked your world and you know it."

Kisa struggled to get away from the man in front of him. "Whatever happened last night meant nothing. Please leave. I have work."

"Even better, I'll drop you off!"

"No!" Kisa yelled. He tied his sheet off at his waist so that it wouldn't fall down and bent down to grab Ichimura's clothes. He thrust them into the other man's arms. "Get dressed and get out or else I'll kick you out as you are now."

Ichimura's smug smirk didn't fade. "Fine, if that's how you feel, Shouta. But if you ever need me, you know my number."

"Like I'd ever call you, you snake."

"Ouch, that hurt." The smile still didn't leave and Kisa felt sick. When Kisa refused to say anything else, Ichimura got dressed and left as he was told. As soon as the door clacked shut, Kisa fell to his knees and grabbed his phone from the kitchen counter. He shakily dialled Morimoto's number.

"Hello?" Morimoto replied groggily, obviously having only just woken up.

"I slept with Ichimura."

There was a moment of silence as Morimoto let out a deep sigh. "Are you sure?"

"I'm positive," Kisa replied, ignoring the dull pain his lower back.

"How could you let this happen?"

"I don't know! I was drunk…"

"That is no excuse, Shouta, and you know it," Morimoto scolded. Kisa hung his head in shame. "You have to tell Yukina-san."

"I don't want to."

"Shouta, if you don't, the guilt will just eat you alive. Yukina-san's a nice guy; I'm sure he'd forgive you after some time," Morimoto reassured him, her voice breaking slightly from having only just woken up.

Kisa didn't want to believe Morimoto, but he knew she was right.

"Shouta?"

"I'm here, but I have to go to work now."

"Okay, call me when you get there, we're not ending this conversation," Morimoto said as she shuffled about in her bed.

"Okay, Kana. I'll speak to you soon."

"Bye, Shouta."

Kisa flipped his phone shut and got up to take a shower. He felt dirty.

Onodera knew something was wrong with his boss the moment Kisa walked in through the door greeting him with a simple "Ricchan". The brunette stood up and grabbed a cup of coffee from the staff room and placed it in front of the distant looking Kisa along with some articles that he had to analyse.

"Are you feeling okay, Kisa-san?"

Kisa didn't reply, he just looked out of his office window with a far-away look.

"Kisa-san?"

Kisa whipped his head around, a hopeful look on his face. But the hope disappeared when he only saw Onodera before him. "Ricchan, could you do me a huge favour?"

Onodera straightened up. "Yes, of course, Kisa-san."

"Could you go to the café nearby and get me a cinnamon swirl please?" Kisa used cinnamon swirls as a vice; it was his food to escape guilt.

"O-of course Kisa-san," Onodera replied, shocked by the request. "Is that all?"

Kisa handed Onodera some money. "Go buy yourself something sweet too."

"Thank you, Kisa-san." Onodera left with the order and money, making sure to close the office door behind him. Kisa turned back from his desk to stare out his window, he didn't normally feel guilty about sleeping with men at random, but why was this time different? His mind suddenly focused on the first time he and Yukina had sex, and the love that Yukina had in his mind, and the knot in Kisa's stomach tightened. His phone rang, disturbing him from his thoughts. He brought his phone out of his trouser pocket and looked at the ID. It was Yukina.

Speak of the devil, Kisa thought; he could have picked a better time to call. Kisa snapped the phone closed and placed it on his desk. It continued to ring, and Kisa had no intention of answering it.

Yukina would try the office number next, but Kisa was fine with that. All calls had to go through Onodera first. So without him there, all calls went to voice mail and Kisa wouldn't have to talk to him.

The knot in Kisa's stomach only tightened.

Onodera came back after half an hour, looking flustered and rushed. "Sorry, there was a long queue at the café. Here's your swirl." Onodera placed the pastry onto Kisa's desk and Kisa smiled gratefully.

"Thank you, Ricchan, I appreciate it. What did you get?"

"Oh, I got an iced bun… I'm not very picky when it comes to desserts," Onodera confessed as he brought his own treat out from its wrapping. "I'm going to check on the voice mail."

Kisa waved him off as he took a bite into his cinnamon swirl, relishing in the delicious taste he loved so much.

There were a few moments of a silence and then Onodera poked his head around Kisa's door. "Kisa-san, you have a call from Yukina Kou, do you want me to pass it through?"

"No thanks. Delete it, Ricchan."

Onodera opened his mouth to say something, but closed it again and left. Kisa ignored the aching feeling in the pit of his stomach as he continued to eat his sweet pastry. He was doing the right thing; he was giving Yukina a chance to walk away before he got too involved and ended up getting hurt.

Yukina got worried when Kisa didn't answer his phone the first time round, and he got even more panicked when he left a message at his work but never got a call back. He was sat in his black Ford, driving to Kisa's apartment. When he saw the green and orange mask along with the ugly grandfather clock, he knew he was in the right place. He stormed up to Kisa's flat and rang the doorbell. No answer. Yukina knew Kisa was in; the lights were on and, unless Kisa left his lights on whilst out, there was no other option.

Yukina knocked on the door loudly. "Kisa-san! I know you're in!"

From the inside Kisa had sought sanctuary in his bathroom, ignoring the pleas and bangs from outside.

"Kisa-san!" Yukina called once more before he gave up and decided to ring Kisa's mobile. When Kisa didn't pick up, he gave up all hope and walked away. Yukina felt a mixture of feelings: confusion, anger, and hurt. It felt as if they were taking one step forward and three steps back. The closer Yukina got, the further Kisa seemed to push him away.

A week had passed since Yukina had last contacted Kisa, and the latter felt even guiltier than before. As he rode up to his office in the elevator he was planning his day ahead. He had a meeting with Ichinose after lunch, and then he had an article to write on Usami Akihiko's latest novel. Kisa entered Onodera's office space and left a note telling his assistant to say to anyone, besides Ichinose, that he was out and therefore unreachable.

Sitting down at his desk and switching on his computer, he called Onodera in for a coffee run. Onodera sighed and rolled his eyes but complied. He returned with two mugs of coffee, one for Kisa and one for himself.

"Sit down, Ricchan," Kisa offered, nodding to the chair in front of his desk. Onodera took the offer with a smile and sat down.

"Kisa-san, I have a question."

Kisa didn't look up from his computer screen. "About what?"

"You've been avoiding Yukina-san every time he calls in. Is there any particular reason why?"

Kisa looked up at this and began to shift things on his desktop. "It's… personal, Ricchan."

"Understood. Do you want me to tell him to stop bothering you and arrange a meeting?"

"No!" Kisa said a little too loudly. Onodera gave him a funny look. "I mean, no thanks, Ricchan. Just block his number."

"Whatever you say, Kisa-san." Onodera drank from his mug of coffee and looked around the office. His eyes landed on a very beautiful bouquet of flowers on the coffee table to the side of the room. "Where did you get those from?" He asked, nodding towards the flowers.

Kisa went red. "A friend."

"A friend?" Onodera echoed.

"Yes, it was a house-warming gift."

"Then why aren't they in your house?" Onodera asked, confused.

"Because I felt like the office needed some life and colour," Kisa said, repeating Yukina's words. Onodera's mouth formed an 'o' and gave an understanding nod.

"They're very pretty."

Kisa looked from his computer and gazed at them. He let out a sigh. "Yeah, they are."

"Kisa-san?" Onodera wasn't used to seeing Kisa this way.

"Anyway, don't you have work to do, Ricchan?" Kisa asked, a cheery smile taking over the detached look he had had a few moments ago.

"Yes, I guess I do. Buzz me if you need me, and don't forget your meeting today."

"I won't!" Kisa called out after Onodera as the brunette left. Kisa sighed and placed his head in his hand and stared at the flowers. They reminded him too much of Yukina – they'd have to go.

"I'm sorry, sir, but Kisa-san is out at the minute," Kisa heard Onodera say. Kisa rolled his eyes. Way to sound natural, Ricchan.

"He's out? Do you know where he is?" The second voice sounded familiar, and Kisa began to panic when he recognised it as Yukina's.

"He's currently in a meeting."

"Do you know when he'll be back?"

"I'm afraid I don't. I apologise, sir, I'll take a name and arrange a meeting for you." No no no! A meeting with Yukina was the last thing Kisa wanted.

"Yukina Kou," Yukina replied, sounding a little worn out. Kisa automatically felt bad for the younger guy.

"Okay, Yukina-san, I'll just write your name down and I'll call when Kisa-san arranges an appointment."

"Are you sure he won't be back soon?"

"I'm sorry, Yukina-san," Onodera apologised. He genuinely felt sympathetic for the guy; the desperation on his face was obvious.

It turned silent for a while and Kisa contemplated hiding under his desk but then there was a buzz and Onodera's voice came through the machine. "You're safe, Kisa-san."

"Thanks, Ricchan. Sorry for putting you out like that."

"I think you should talk to him. He looked desperate to see you."

And the knot tightened even more.

Yukina knew that Morimoto Kana had the answers about why Kisa was avoiding him. He walked into the café he had spotted them in a week ago and, lo and behold, Morimoto was sat talking to a guy with dark brown hair and green eyes. He walked over nervously.

"Morimoto-san?" He asked; the woman looked up in surprise. Her expression softened and turned to one of sympathy once she saw the look on Yukina's face.

"Yukina-san… Can I help you?"

"I was wondering if you could tell me why Kisa-san was ignoring me…"

Morimoto looked uncomfortable and shifted in her seat slightly. "He's not; he's just really busy with work."

Yukina knew she'd say that. The sandy blonde sat at the table beside the couple and dropped his head into his hands. Morimoto coughed into her hand and excused herself. Her partner moved and sat in her place.

"Yukina-san?"

Yukina looked up and smiled sadly. "I'm sorry; I don't mean to pester you whilst you were on a date."

"Don't worry about it, we were discussing wedding stuff. Anyway, Kisa hasn't been busy with work."

"He hasn't?"

I knew it.

"Please don't tell Kana I told you this, but… a week ago, Kisa's ex-boyfriend came into town. Some things happened and they ended up sleeping together."

Yukina stared at him in shock; he could feel his heart breaking… Kisa wouldn't do that, would he?

"He feels terrible about it, and I assume he's ignoring you to save you from pain," Abe continued even though Yukina had stopped listening. "He's not a bad person, really."

Yukina stood up and made his way out of the café. He began to walk down the street calmly before picking up the pace into a run after a few moments. He had only one destination in mind: Kisa's apartment.