Disclaimer - Twilight and all it's characters belong to Stephenie Meyer. However, the plot of this story is completely my own.
A/N: Hey there! Sorry for the wait. This chapter required a lot of my time to get the plot right, as it is a pretty pivotal chapter. Also, not to mention that I've been ridiculously busy these past few weeks. Hope the wait wasn't too long ;D
In other news, I've found a beta! Thanks to lulu for beta'ing this chapter. She spotted a lot of obvious mistakes, so thanks again to her for looking over it :)
Enjoy the chapter!
-Luce xo
School days are always a long blur to me. Monday mornings are even worse. Edward picked me up, normal time, and was his usual chatty self. It was like nothing was wrong. Almost as if the weekend had never existed.
"Bella?" Edward drew my attention away from my thoughts. In fact, the whole of the math class was turned around staring at me.
Edward stroked my hand. "Are you okay, sweetie? You look faint."
I did feel faint. Yet I knew what the cause was. Was Edward really going to pretend nothing was wrong?
I shakily stood up. "I...need some air." I barely made it out of the class and out of the front doors before collapsing against the nearest wall. I sunk down to the ground, and pulled my knees up close to me. Closing my eyes, I did my best to calm myself down. A task that seemed impossible. Edward was going to leave, and he hasn't even attempted to talk to me about it. Nothing.
Footsteps alerted me to his presence. "What's happening?" Edward knelt down next to me.
I tried to contain the outburst that I knew was about to come out. My explosive mouth was a liability.
"You know what's happening." I spoke out loud, not realising that my tone was laced with venom. "You're really moving away. Just when were you going to tell me? Five minutes before you were actually leaving? Or maybe not even then. Maybe I'd find out from Charlie, after realising that your house was deserted." Explosive mouth syndrome...
Edward took my hands. "I didn't want you to worry. Or think that I was leaving you... because I'm not. I'll always be here for you, always. Please don't tell me this is what's causing this..." He motioned towards my form, huddled on the ground.
"Seriously, Edward?" My anger was seeping through, and I was fighting a losing battle against my mouth... "You didn't want me to worry? What else do you think I'll do?Go and celebrate? Throw you a fucktastic leaving party?" I pushed myself off the ground. "You say you'll always be here for me," I spoke in a softer tone, "yet you can't be. You'll be in Seattle."
I walked away back to class.
...-...
The ride home was a quiet affair. I guess me and Edward weren't speaking now. The silence was aggravating. As we pulled up onto the drive, Edward cut the engine.
"We need to talk."
I sighed. I knew this was coming.
"Bella, you have to stop shutting me out all the time. Just...tell me what you're really thinking. Starting now." Edward's tone was insistent.
Fine. I'll tell him. "You think that you moving away doesn't mean anything, but it does. Your life will be different. My life will be different...And now we're having this chat, we need to talk about Friday night. You've been keeping pretty quiet about it. We both lost our virginity that night, Edward. We can't take that back." Edward stiffened in his seat.
"Friday night was a drunken mistake." He whispered, almost as if he was talking to himself.
A drunken mistake... Tears were forming fresh. I wrenched open the car door, determined to cut this conversation short.
"Bella!" He was shouting now. Keep walking. Keep walking. Where the fuck are my front door keys? "Jesus, what's gotten into you? I didn't mean it like that, and you know it." Gotcha. I opened the front door, and wasdetermined not to hear it.
"Stop ignoring me, for fuck's sake." I felt my arm being wrenched, and Edward pulled me directly in front of him.
I was relentlessly crying now. No point holding it in.
"I love you. That's never going to change. So please, stop deluding yourself. What I meant, before you played the drama card back there, was that Friday night was a mistake. I intended for it to be romantic, and completely centred on you. But alcohol took over instead. So I'm sorry." Pain flashed across the planes of his face.
I understood. Damn my theatrics...
I'm such a bitch sometimes. "I'm sorry too. For not listening to you...and then ignoring you." I wrapped my arms around him. I felt his lips press against my hair. Tears were still pouring down my cheeks.
"Wh-When do you..." I tried to choke the word out. "Leave?" I rubbed my tear-stained cheeks in the nook beneath his shoulder blade.
Edward sighed. "Next Friday."
...-...
My dreams were full of endings and beginnings. Light and darkness. Happiness and loss. The strange thing was that I could not separate them. They were laced together, part of the same string. Especially the happiness and loss.
The next morning, I woke up feeling groggy. I was restless. I splashed cold water over my face, in a poor effort to wake me up. Charlie had left me a cup of tea out on the counter that was still hot when I got downstairs. His random acts of kindness were, of course, random, yet they were sweet nonetheless.
I heard Edward's Volvo pull up outside, and grabbed my bag and hopped in. I was going to put on a brave face, I decided. Edward would be feeling shit about the whole thing, and me being a bitch to him wasn't going to help anything.
"By the way, you're coming over Casa del Cullen tonight. Esme's cooking you dinner." Oh. Okay.
"Any reason for this? Or is Esme trying to soften the blow of you guys leaving?" I smiled at him. Putting on a brave face and all that...
"Well...she feels guilty. Just come, please?" His tone was sweet, and I couldn't refuse Esme's meals...
I put on my best hero's smile, and nodded.
School was...school. It was pointless. If it wasn't for the fact that I needed to get into college, I wouldn't even consider turning up. Edward was a natural born genius, so of course, he enjoyed school, much to my bitterness.
At lunch, Edward made his announcement to our table.
"I have something to say to you all. I'm sure you'll find out soon enough, but...me and my family are leaving town." I turned and hid my face from the stares of the table. "We're moving to Seattle." Mike was the first to respond.
"Seattle? But...Edward. What about..." Again, the stares were heavy on my shoulders. Mike mumbled on. I couldn't hear anymore of this. Edward's fingers brushed against my cheek and I was secure.
...-...
Heaven was attacking my nostrils. Sitting in the Cullens' kitchen, it's hard not to feel at home. So many happy memories...
This table. It was where Edward and I baked cookies for the school fair. Double chocolate chip. We turned the kitchen into a chocolate-covered mess.
The state of the art oven. It was where Edward burnt his hand, attempting to cook me a birthday meal, and we ended up spending the evening in the emergency room.
Esme's honey soft voice woke me out of my stupor. "Here you go, sweetie." She stroked my hair and put a bowl of pesto pasta out in front of me. Edward sat next to me, and then Jasper opposite. Esme joined us carrying her bowl, and we started eating. I was disconnected from the food; the thought of not being able to sit down like this whenever I pleased was startling.
I chewed the pasta, not tasting it.
Carlisle returned home shortly after, directing a curt nod towards me. I looked away.
"Right, I'll walk you home, Bells." Edward held out his hand, waiting for me.
"Wait." I mumbled. I approached Esme, giving her a hug. I put all my worries, love and despair into it. She kissed my head in return.
I joined Edward, placing my hand in his.
…-…
The days ran on like water. I tried to grasp at them, to make them stay, but time took its course.
Before I time to prepare, it was the day. Friday.
I woke up earlier than usual. The Cullen's were leaving early, and I would be damned if I didn't see them off. Him off…
Charlie didn't say anything to me. I was grateful. I couldn't handle words. He was letting me stay off school for the day. Again, I was grateful.
I walked across the road, seeing the bright yellow moving van. I bit down on my lip.
Be strong, be strong. I chanted.
Edward was stood outside, waiting for me.
Again, he spoke the words I had heard so many times. There was a chilling familiarity about them.
"Let's take a walk." He spoke with meaning. I knew this wasn't our final goodbye; I would be up there every weekend, seeing his face. Yet it felt so final.
I placed my hand in his. He squeezed.
We were under the old oak trees now, in the Cullen backyard. The leaves were threatening to fall, hanging on for dear life, as if scared of falling. The air was chilled. Fall was coming.
Edward stopped. He took my head in his hands, and placed his lips on mine. The kiss was strong, like diamonds, yet there was a fragility about it. A brokenness.
I fervently poured my soul into his lips, his soft embrace. He was my best friend. My savior. My constant companion. My everything. This wasn't a crush; I knew for a fact that our love would not go away. Like ivy on an old tower, Edward had grown with me. He completed me.
His arms wrapped around my waist. Pulling and pulling, closer. I could feel his heartbeat beneath his shirt, the blood pumping around his veins.
Breathless, he broke the kiss. "This isn't the end." He whispered onto my lips. "I love you, Isabella."
I hid my face in his shoulder. I let him go.
The sun retreated behind the clouds, and my happiness pulled away.
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