A/N: Sorry about the uh… one year break? I kind of forgot about this until now! So without further ado, here is chapter four of Hidden Emotion

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As soon as the door closes behind me I immediately take action.

Damn Yukio, making decisions without my consent! The whole reason I'm not in their dorm in the first place is because I'm a flame wielding, uncontrollable demon!

I rip off the bloodied bandages that wrapped my leg where they had pulled the shard of glass free. It hurt a lot at first, but now it is a mere ache compared to what I have gone through.

I limp slightly over to a four legged, wooden chair and pick it up with ease. Carrying it over to the door, I tilt it on it's side and jam the top of the chair under the door handle so that they couldn't open it.

With a little smirk, I pick up Kurikara and sling the long blade onto my back and look around before giving a small sigh.

I walk over to the desk that sits in front our window and grab a few things before stuffing them into a small bag - pencil sharpener, a small army knife (hey, you never know what might happen), a jacket and a small note book.

My hand lingers in front of a picture of Yukio and I when we were younger in front of Shiro. Back before this whole mess started in the first place. But even then, I could not escape the names that would haunt me forever.

Demon

Monster

Satan's child

Even back in kindergarten I would be called these names because of my unknown strength.

I guess thats what they call irony.

I snap out of my little day dream with a twist of the door handle behind me. This causes a little bit of panic to rise in my chest, but I try my best to ignore the feeling.

Reaching out to the window overlooking the city I now live in, I unlock it and open it up. I can hear Yukio calling, pleading for me to open the door.

I guess I'm a pretty shitty brother.

I push myself over the edge just before I hear the chair behind me fall over. Hurtling towards the ground, I readjust myself in the air to land on my feet. The sudden impact shudders through my legs, causing my new injury to reopen.

Any human who attempted to jump from this height would have most certainly been killed; however, it was a nice reminder that I am just a mere demon who doesn't belong in this world.

A tight knot instantly forms in my chest as I hear Yukio's worried voice from above.

I'm making Yukio worry about me again…

Without further notice, I stand up and run around the building and down the streets. I know I can't get far because Mephisto would probably be able to track me down the moment I stepped outside the city.

I duck into a small, dark alley to catch my breath and think. The knot in my chest is still building with every thought of leaving Yukio behind in his moment of despair.

My hands fumble for my bag, opening it up and taking out the pencil sharpener and the army knife. The knot in my chest simply grows and grows, making my hands shake harder and my vision blur.

Shit, calm yourself!

I blink away the tears that were forming in my eyes. I'm a demon, I'm not supposed to have emotion according to everyone else.

But then why do I do this?

I breath in slowly and out slowly to calm my racing nerves as I flip open the knife, popping out a screwdriver tab within the army knife. I insert it into the screw that held the blade on the sharpener itself.

With a few successful turns, I now have two separate pieces of metal in my hand.

I immediately drop the army knife and the now useless hunk of metal, gripping the blade of the sharper tightly in my hand.

The welling sensation was growing evermore larger now

I need a release of some kind before…

My thoughts trail off.

Before what? What do I have to live for anymore? Yukio was the only one that cared for me before and now he probably hates me!

I didn't realize how hard I was gripping the small, rectangular, metal blade until I saw a small pool of red in my hand. I watch the colour rising in my hand, before tilting it and letting the red colour fall onto the ground beside me.

That's right… no one needs my anymore.

I roll up my sleeve.

I'm just the fucked up twin.

I admire the blade, it's deadly sharp. Sharp enough to cut wood and lead.

My classmates hate me.

I move the blade over a vein on my left arm.

I hate myself.

I push down with the blade deep enough for it to instantly making the red liquid pool onto my skin and drip down the side.

It doesn't even hurt anymore, it's just a dull ache compared to everything that's going on.

Everything around me seems to stop. I can breath a little easier now, the knot in my chest fading just a little.

I drag the blade towards my body, cutting deeper than I ever had before. I can already feel myself getting dizzy. Whether it was from adrenaline or blood loss, I don't know.

And I honestly don't care.

I raise the blade slightly, watching the red liquid ooze from the fresh wound I just gave myself. The knot in my chest is still there and it still hurts to breath.

I avoided the vein last time, but this time I position the blade directly over the vein itself. I push down again, this time I can feel a shooting pain through my body as it hits the vein.

I can't say I don't enjoy the feeling anymore.

My vision blurs once more and I can see black spots dancing in the corners of my eyes.

Dragging the blade once again quickly, another small stream of blood instantly poured from the newer cut.

Even with my demon healing capabilities, I know this will take a while to stop bleeding.

My hands start to feel slightly clammy, my body was probably going into overdrive to stop myself from bleeding out.

I find myself hoping that I do bleed out.

I tilt my chin up towards the sky, dark grey clouds had appeared overhead and I could feel a few drops of rain. A few drops turned into a steady rainfall, which quickly turned into a full out rain storm.

Thunder rumbled overhead as I was instantly soaked all the way to my bones. I shiver slightly, finding my motions now were becoming sluggish. The black dots now took over half my vision as I shift my hand to my bag groggily.

I'm desperately trying to get out a my jacket I packed earlier but my hands just aren't coordinating anymore.

If the blood loss doesn't kill me, hypothermia definitely will.

A sudden bubble popped into my head as my hands shake uncontrollably from the cold.

Do I really want to die like this?

I sniffle through the rain, my arms dropping to the side in a failed effort to take out the jacket.

I simply lay there, limp and completely soaked all the way through my clothes. Cold to my bones.

Blood still pouring out of my two fresh cuts on my arm.

The black suddenly overwhelms my vision and I can do nothing but close my eyes.

Thunder rumbles overhead, but I can not hear it over the hammering of my heart in my ears.

I don't want to die!

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A/N: So there is chapter four, I sincerely apologize about the one year break. I'll be sure to update in the near future… that is if Rin survives this ordeal.

Reviews are welcome!