"When Dinosaurs ruled the earth"
Habitat Cluster Charlie
(Skipper's POV)
We rushed out of the visitor center to find utter chaos. All the secure staff gates were open, zoo guests running around in a panic, and a multitude of confused and panicking prehistoric beasts. The zoo's asset containment unit was struggling to contain the escaped animals with tranq-guns, stun-guns, and tasers. "I want those dinosaurs returned to their habitats as quickly and humanely as possible," a game warden shouted, "also I want tasers on full charge!" "Keep the raptors from going into the long grass!" one of the asset containment troops said. "Skipper," Kowalski said, "Hans is incoming!" I turned around and saw hans running towards us with the red squirrels pain cannon. Rico quickly destroyed it with his rocket launcher before hans could fire a shot. Hans disappeared back into the visitor center probably to get another weapon. He probably has a weapon cache secreted away somewhere.
"Secure the paddocks!" someone shouted. "The gate controls aren't responding!" "somebody get the technicians down here!" "there all the way in India!" "why are our technicians in another country!" "Outsourcing!" "Idiots," Kowalski muttered, "complete and utter idiots." "Is there a manual override!" "I don't know! nobody answers my questions or tells me anything!" "What is going on over there?" Alice shouted, "get those overgrown lizards back in their habitats!" "what do you think we're doing!" a CPZ ACU commander shouted. "What gives you the right to be over here anyway?" the head game warden shouted. "Head Zookeeper," Alice replied, "I was promoted…about time too." "Promoted? Since when?" I said. "Since I hacked into the zoo overlords' system and appointed her head zookeeper," Kowalski replied, "she seems happier…especially after she hired all those much needed new zookeepers. And a zoo secretary."
"should we contain the dinosaurs?" Private asked. "These people are out of their league," I said, "let's do this." Kowalski held up a strange gun, "Perfect! This is a great oppunitity to test my new stun gun!" Kowalski blasted a bolt of electricitity at a Triceratops which was instantly rendered unconscious. "Nice one Kowalski," I said pulling out my taser, "but I'm still hankering to use this thing!" Rico hacked up a tranq gun and a game-rated taser. "Let's move! Commence Operation: Prehistoric Security!" "we have incoming," Private said, "Alice!" we quickly rushed into the bushes as Alice came across the unconscious Triceratops. "This is sleeping beauty back in it's habitat!" Alice ordered two interns and a couple of ACU troopers. A pair of U.S. Park Rangers watched warily tranq guns at the ready. "we should really be renamed to Dino Rampage Response Team. "What is this Zoo Tycoon?" somebody asked. "How about Animal Containment Team," another person asked. "How about you hurry up!" Alice asked, "this isn't a staff meeting!"
"Looks like the nastiness is still there," Kowalski said. I shuddered, "at least she doesn't direct that at us…" "I like this better when we only had to worry about a giraffe, a zebra, a hippo, and a pampered lion escaping," Zookeeper Maurice said. "Wait? We had a lion?" Alice said. "You know Alex…the Lion…the city of new york." "Who?" Alice asked. "he's with the fur power circus now," (Zookeeper) Maurice said. "Never heard of him," Alice replied. "You never heard of the most famous lion on earth?" the game warden asked. "Alex…the lion? Nope never heard of him? Maybe if he had a twitter account?" "He used to be the best act in the zoo," Maurice (the zookeeper) said. "He was much easier to care for than Melmen," Dr. Goldstien said. (wait? He still works here!? I thought he was replaced by Dr. Deranged?) "I can imagine," Dr. Deranged replied cocking a tranq gun.
"I have my eyes on you…you needle sticking monster!" I shouted. Kowalski, Rico, and Private gave me weird looks. "I mean…we have dinos to save!" I said. "Wait," Kowalski said, "the zoo has an entire team decided to containing escaped dinosaurs…" "ACU…they do need a new name that sounds too…" "Jurassic World," Kowalski said, "I mean all the ACU did was get eaten!" I watched as the zoo staff Load a Tranqalized T-rex onto a truck with a crane. "We only have 30 minutes!" a man shouted, "move it!" The Truck drove to the T-rex Habitat as a helicopter flies into view carrying a Stegosaurs on a sling. A heavy duty forklift carried a bundled Triceratops into it's habitat unscathed. A team of vets then injected the dinosaur with aderaline waking it up. The Triceratops then lumbered to join the rest of it's herd who were happily munching on vegetation.
"Wow these people don't mess around," Kowalski said. "Assets 65% contained," a man said into a walkie, "we got these in the bag." "Okay," I said, "let's leave this to the dino-wrangling professionals…now what we're expert at is…PUFFIN BEATING!" "I thought it's military operations," Private said. "Dail down the moxie! We're getting that puffin!" We rushed into the visitor center and found it completely empty. Kowalski had his phone hacked into the CCTV feed, "Okay according to CCTV," Kowalski announced, "Everyone is in the safety zone." "Good no witnesses," I said, "can you locate Hans on CCTV!" "I would need direct access to security command," Kowalski said.
"Where is that?" I asked. "based on the semactics I stole it should be located next to the staff room in the basement." Private was looking at the maps by the front entrance, "Kowalski! That level's only accesable by the staff elevator!" "I believe the staff elevator is this way!" Kowalski said walking towards the exhibit hall. We followed Kowalski into the hall and pasted several fossil displays including a large sauropod. "Hmm…I've seen bigger," Kowalski said as he glanced at it. We then past some statues depicting several species including some raptors. "Grossly Inaccurate," Kowalski muttered as we passed the raptor statues, "Too large and where the feathers? Even I idiot knows that dinosaurs had feathers! This is an insult to our mightly ancestors!" We passed a complete igunadon skeleton that was next to the famously inaccurate Igunadon statue from central park. "Oh not that thing again!" Kowalski muttered, "that thing should go in the scrapheap!"
After several minutes of Kowalski critizing the exhibits we made it to a hallway with a exit sign on it. We passed the two public bathrooms and the family bathroom and visitor elevator. At the end of the hallway towards the emergency exit was the staff elevator. "Blast it!' Kowalski said, "we need a staff passcard!" "Rico! Secure a staff ID badge!" I shouted. Rico hacked up Alice's old ID Badge and tossed it to Kowalski. "Is this even still valid anymore?" Kowalski said as he pressed it against the scanner. There was a ding and the elevator opened and we quickly pailed in. Kowalski hit the button for the basement and the doors slid close.
Shortly…
We got off the elevator the doors closing behind us and found ourselves in a boiler room. Kowalski had his tablet out with the semactics and led us into the staff break room. We snuck past the staff in the room and went up to the security room. "We move silent, we move fast," I whispered. We silently entered the room and took out the two on-duty rent-a-cops. The two slightly overweight men fell out of their chairs and crumpled to the ground. A donut fell out of one of their hands and rolled across the floor and disappeared under a table. And that table happened to have a open half-finished box of donuts on it.
Kowalski was quickly at the security control panel. "Oh come on! Who eat's a jelly donut over a keyboard!" Kowalski complained wiping some jelly off the controls. "There!" Private shouted pointing to one of the screens. "Kowalski focus on level 3 cam 4!" I shouted. Kowalski hit a button and the field of screens were replaced by the feed in question. We watched as Hans moved out of a storage closet holding his infamous laser weapon. "Got you hans!" I said. Hans aimed his weapon at the camera and fired and the feed instantly went dead. Kowalski quickly switched by to the feed overview. Suddenly all the camera's on level three went out. "He's taking out the cameras!" Kowalski shouted. "Oh dear!" Private said, "we just lost all the level two camera! And the level one cameras!" Suddenly the feeds in the boiler room went out followed by the staff room.
Suddenly all the camera but the one in the staff room turned back on. And then the camera to the hallway just outside the door turned off. "What is this Five Nights at Freddy's?" Kowalski asked. "That Game gave me nightmares!" Private said. "I told you not to play it at night!" Kowalski shouted. "The Second one was even worst," Private said. "Why would you even play the second one?" Kowalski asked, "not even I could finish that one!" "I did't say I finished it," Private said. "Seriously?" I said, "It wasn't that scary you nancy cats!" "CLOSE THE HEAVY DUTY DOOR!" Kowalski shouted. "You don't have one," Hans replied, "So I guess you all just died." Hans smirked as he leveled his weapon at us, "any last words?"
"Personal fowl! 15 yard penality," I replied, "automatic first down!" "What?" Hans said, "what does American football have to do with anything?" "American football?" I said, "why can't it be just football." "Because in Europe…and well the rest of the world Soccer is called football," Kowalski said, "Soccer? What idiot came up with that name? Your kicking a ball around with your feet therefore…Football!" "Makes more sense then throwing a misshapened ball around," Private said. "I knew right!" Hans said. "Then what do you call proper football?" I said, "with the goalposts, and the tackling!" "rugby," Kowalski replied. "Okay Kowalski tell me this," I said, "what the weird game with the strangely shaped bats and the posts instead of bases." "What!?" Private said, "Cricket isn't weird! It's the national sport of england"
"And who calls fries…chips," I said. "because there chips," Private said. "And why are potato chips called crisps?" "Because their crispy!" Private shouted. I slapped Private across the face and held up a potato chip, "THIS IS A CHIP!" I then held up a french fry, "These are fries!" I then help up a cheesy dibble, "And THESE ARE CRIPSY!" "Skipper," Kowalski said, "maybe stop insulting the countries!" "Insulting the countries?" I said, "I don't insult countries…the idiot in charge of the country does that!" "Donald Trump?" Kowalski said. "Never say his name!" I shouted, "He is he-who-colludes-with-russia-obstructs-justice-insults-allies-wants-a-wall-that-mexico-pays-for-tweets-too-much-wants-a-space-force-and-shall-not-be-named!"
"whoa," Hans said, "he really hates that orange haired human." "Almost as much as you, dave, and blowhole," Private replied. "Hmm…exculsive club," Hans muttered. Suddenly an alarm went off on the security screen. "Alert! Alert! Massive Escape breech near Discovery center!" "What!" I shouted. "Let just say I weakened a wall or two," Hans replied, "with…bombs." "all those children and their families…what a disaster." "No not a disaster!" I shouted, "we're saving those dinosaurs, the humans, and this zoo or I'm not your skipper!" "Make a choice Skipper," Hans said, "Your revenge on me or the lifes of countless humans and Extant Dinosaurs." "what does Extant mean?" Private asked. "Un-extincted," Kowalski replied. "Move! Move! Move!" I shouted as we rushed out of the lair. Once we were out of earshot a phone rang and Hans picked it up. "Hello?" Hans asked. "Give me a status report," a voice said. "the break-out didn't go as smoothly as we wanted," Hans replied, "Those blasted penguins got involved again."
"Forgot about the Pen-gu-wins for now," Blowhole replied, "everything is going exactly as planned…" "If you say so Dr. Mammalfish," Hans replied. "Stop calling me that!" Blowhole replied. "What ever you say Dr, Mammalfish," Hans replied. " Uh…anyway, the Pen-gu-wins must continue to believe that I have nothing to do with this." "Very well," Hans said. "Now while the penguins are distracted saving the day…I want you to make sure that the zoo gates are shuttered…FOREVER!" "You know the ridicously deep-voice doesn't really work over the phone," Hans said. "Just get it done!" Blowhole shouted as he hung up. "It will be done Dr. Mammalfish," Hans replied as he silently walked out of the room. The two security men finally came to and immeditately got to work…on the box of donuts. Seriously Officer X would have done a much better job!
(end of chapter four)