(Note: I just wanted to say thank you to gilmoradict for my very first review. I am excited to bring you the next installment. The tale grows a bit darker here, but there has to be darkness before the light. Edward Remington is a fictional character of my own creation, as is the item from his estate sale)
Chapter 4: The Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come
Steele awoke with a start, looking around the bedroom which was in near darkness. It felt like he had just fallen asleep after his trip with the Ghost of Christmas Present. The only light came from outside, moonlight shining through the balcony doors and windows, and it showed a dark fog rolling into the bedroom from the living room. Steele cautiously got up from the bed, wracking his tired brain to come up with what the next ghost was in "A Christmas Carol". Too bad he fell asleep before the heart of the movie. *Let's see, the first ghost showed me the past, and the second ghost showed me the present, so logically it stands to reason the third ghost will show me the future* Just as he reached the doorway, he remembered that the ghost in the story appeared as the Grim Reaper or Death. It was still a surprise to see the figure standing against the far wall of his living room, the dark fog appearing to come from underneath the dark robes the person wore, a hood completely covering their face, and no indication whether it was a man or a woman he faced. The figure stood with its arms crossed in front of it, hiding its hands in the sleeves of the robe, and reminding Steele of the monks of St. Costello. Stepping around the sofa, he stood before the figure, and realized that this ghost was a good deal shorter than he was. Taking a deep breath and swallowing the lump that had appeared in his throat, he said, "I believe you are The Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come, and are here to show me the future, is that correct?" The figure nods its hooded head slowly and deliberately. "I'm ready. Show me."
The hooded figure moved, turning to its left, and allowing its right hand to fall to its side as its left hand pointed to the wall. A small dark hole appeared in the wall, and began to grow in size until it was like a window in the wall. Behind the wall, there now appeared a graveyard, dark and dreary, with more fog covering the ground and wind blowing dead leaves about. Steele took a deep breath, and focused on trying to remember what happened in the book. The Ghost of Christmas Present had warned him that this would be harder, and he was certainly beginning to feel quite scared about what he was about to see. As the portal continued to widen, he thought he remembered that Scrooge was shown his own lonely grave, and the death of Tiny Tim. He tried to brace himself to see a gravestone with the name "Remington Steele" on it - or would it say "Harrison Daniel Chalmers"? Whose death would he be shown? He began to dread what was to come more and more with each passing second. Finally the portal was open to the floor and wide enough to walk through. The Ghost just stood there, pointing out the portal, waiting for him to walk into the graveyard. Taking another deep breath, he began to walk forward. When he was right in front of the Ghost, he turned to look at it more closely. He could see nothing of their face, only their hand. A small, feminine hand poked out of the sleeve, pointing him towards the graveyard. He turned back and focused on walking on the uneven ground towards a small hill with a single, withered tree on it, where he could see a gravestone. As soon as he cleared the portal, he heard the Ghost begin to follow him, and looking back, he saw the portal to his living room closing behind them. The wind was cold, biting through his silk pajamas and robe. He tightened the robe around him and crossed his arms to try and warm his suddenly icy-cold hands. When he reached the base of the hill, he now saw not a gravestone, but two gravestones side by side under the tree at the top of the small hill. It was too dark to make anything out on either stone. He waited at the hill for the Ghost to catch up, not sure what he was to do.
When the Ghost reached him, it pointed up the hill, and suddenly the moon broke through the clouds and shone down upon the gravestone marking the grave on the right. "Daniel Chalmers (1927 - 1987)" it read. Steele stared at the stone and looked back at the Ghost in shock. "Daniel was sick, the other Ghost showed me that he was sick, but he's going to die in the next week?" Thinking back to what he had seen, it was unlikely that he would have received the package Daniel was sending before he died. He didn't plan on calling Daniel for Christmas, he had never thought to do it in the past, so that would mean he never got to say goodbye to his beloved mentor, friend... and father. Steele felt tears pricking at his eyes, and shook his head, "No, that's not right; we deserve a chance to speak as father and son at least once before he dies." He turned towards the Ghost and continued, "Now that I know this, I can book a flight to London first thing in the morning, I can get at least a little time to be with him at the end, can't I?" The hooded figure shook its head no. "No? Why the bloody hell not?" The Ghost waves its arm towards the hill, and the moonlight expanded to include the second gravestone in its beam of light. "Laura Holt (1954 - 1987)"
Steele stared; not believing what the ghost was showing him. Taking several deep breaths he whispered, "I can't go to Daniel because Laura is going to die at the same time?" He turned to the Ghost, the tears now rolling freely down his cheeks, a rare display of emotion for Steele. The hooded figure nods its head and Steele drops to his kneels before the hill, the tears turning into sobs he is unable to contain. Once he is able to gain control of himself, he raises his head. "No. I don't believe you, this can't be the future. I can't lose them both at the same time. What happened? You have to show me what bloody happens!"
The Ghost lowered its hand, and the moonlight fades for a moment, then Steele feels something hit him that was carried by the wind. Looking down he sees a wall calendar showing 1987, and the wind begins to blow the pages, 1988, 1989, 1990, 1991, stopping at 1992. The picture for 1992 shows another graveyard, and as Steele looks at the picture he feels himself falling forward, down into the picture and through it, until he is standing next to a grave next to the Ghost. There is snow on the ground, and he can read the gravestone clearly in the dim light. This is Daniel's grave, and two people are standing next to it. He recognizes Felicia and Chalky, who were friends of a sort to both Daniel and himself. They are speaking softly, and Steele moves closer to hear what they are saying.
Felicia dabs at her eyes with a handkerchief, "I can't believe he's been gone for 5 years now. It seems like just yesterday we were plotting to collect all of those wonderful gems from the Earl of Claridge's wedding. Then poor Michael got pulled into it and it all went wrong." Chalky nods, "'arry ain't been here to visit 'im once?", nodding in the direction of the grave. Felicia shakes her head no. "Michael is in so much pain from losing Laura and Daniel at the same time. I think he blames himself for not being here when Daniel needed him, and stays away as punishment. Especially this time of year, he can't bear it. I visited him for Christmas last year, and he apparently relives the Christmas of 1987 over and over again in some kind of penance. He almost never leaves the apartment, from what that Krebs woman told me. He's completely lost all sense of direction in his pain, and is just collapsing in on himself. It's so heartbreaking to see, I can't bear to go back." Chalky shakes his head sadly, "Will 'arry ever come back?" "I don't know," Felicia says sadly, "I am beginning to doubt it. I thought once Laura was out of his life, he could come back to me. I asked him about that once, and thought now was my chance. But it appears I was wrong, he was far more than smitten with the girl, he was in love with her and never told her so. Unrequited love never to be fulfilled is such a painful thing to see, Chalky. He can't bear to leave her, even though she's gone."
Steele stood there by Daniel's grave, shocked at what he overheard had become of him. He turned to the Ghost, "I need to see this for myself. I don't want to, but I must. Please show me." The Ghost raised its arm, the sleeve hanging down from the arm. This part Steele remembered from the book, and slowly reached out to touch the sleeve of the Ghost. It felt like ice under his fingers, and without feeling himself move at all, he found himself back in the living room of the Rossmore, but it was a far different living room than the one he just left. The curtains at the balcony are pulled shut, closing out the outside world. The furnishings are all the same, but they have a dingy look about them. It looked like the cleaning service hadn't been there in months. Moving over towards the dining room, he saw that the dining room table was covered with take-out food containers from a variety of places in the neighborhood. Steele far preferred to cook for himself, and only did take-out when necessary. If this was his future self's dining habits, things must be dire indeed. He could hear sounds coming from the bedroom, and began to walk around the sofa to see what was going on, when he was riveted by something sitting on the table below his collection of movie posters. Sitting in the center of table was a picture frame, the double image kind that was like a book. On the left side was Humphrey Bogart, and on the left side was Lauren Bacall. He recognized both images as stills from "The Big Sleep", and the two photos were set into the frames to be facing each other, as if they were looking across the picture frame at each other. This wasn't something he owned, and he immediately knew what it had to be. This had to be his mysterious Christmas gift from Laura. He knelt down to look at it closer, and was surprised to find both images autographed. The one said, "To Remington: Humphrey Bogart" and the other said, "To Remington: Lauren Bacall XXX". He just stared, having no idea how on earth Laura could have found such a thing; never even dreamed it existed. Certainly this WOULD have cost a small fortune for the double autographs, but how on EARTH could they be signed "To Remington"? Shaking his head in confusion, he moved forward towards the bedroom, apprehensive about what he would find inside.
He found that he was right be to concerned. He found his future self, unshaven and unkept, in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt watching what appeared to be a traffic video. Steele moved over to get a better view of the screen, and watched in horror as the loop began again. It appeared to be a security video overlooking an intersection with a time-date stamp on it of 12-25-87 12:23PM. He saw what was clearly Laura's little Rabbit enter the intersection, when a semi-trailer truck came flying at her at a 90 degree angle. It slammed into the driver's side of the car at a high rate of speed, before pushing Laura's Rabbit into a parked car on the street, sandwiching it between the semi and the parked car. Steele didn't need to be told this was how Laura was killed; he couldn't imagine anyone surviving such an impact. He realized that the Steele sitting on the bed was muttering and turned to focus his attention on him. "Damn drunk drivers, how is it they can kill an innocent and walk away unharmed? It's not fair, Laura, it's just not fair." He was talking down to a picture he held in his hands, and Steele recognized it as a copy of the picture he had taken of her so long ago, before they had even met, when he was scoping out the security on the Royal Lavulite gems. It was the first time he had laid eyes on Laura Holt, and that moment changed his life forever. That's why he had kept a copy of the picture hidden in his dresser all these years to remember that first brilliant moment. "I need to hear your lilting voice, my love, I miss you so much." The future Steele got up from the bed and moved towards the television where he stopped the video of the accident and switched the tapes. Steele took a closer look at his future self, and could see his hair turning to gray at the temples, and his eyes were so dim. The sparkle that he was used to seeing in them every morning was gone - it was as if something had died inside of him. That something was the piece of his heart that he had given to Laura. This was a shell of his former self, facing day after day without Laura in his world. Steele could see the first tape was labeled "The Accident", and the second tape was labeled "Holt for Steele". After starting the tape, the future Steele returned to the bed and sat back down, picking the picture back up to stare at it until the video started. Then his gaze lifted to the television screen with an intense look, like a glass of water had been placed in front of a man dying of thirst.
Steele turned back to the screen, and saw Laura sitting in her loft, settling back into a chair that had been positioned in front of a video camera facing towards the kitchen. Steele sat down on the bed next to his future self to see what Laura had to say. "Hello, Mr. Steele. If you're watching this video, then something has happened to me and I've died, but you've managed to survive. I'm assuming that we got into some kind of trouble together, we usually do. Whatever happened, there are some things that I need to say to you, and I wanted to make sure that I told them to you, even if I never found the courage to tell you in person. This whole mess with Perennial Life Insurance has made me realize just how fragile our lives are. I know we've had close calls before, but this one was closer than anything I've ever felt before." Steele felt a shiver go down his back, as he remembered the near miss she had with a bomb during that case. If he hadn't defused the bomb in time, Laura could have ended up dead like the young man who triggered the bomb on his own apartment. Additionally, Laura's words were so eerily similar to what Daniel had written in his letter. Daniel couldn't tell him in person, Laura couldn't tell him in person, and he couldn't seem to tell either of them what was in his heart. What a mess. He refocused on Laura's tape. "First, I want to explain to you why I chose to sell the Agency as part of my will." Steele stared in surprise; he didn't even know Laura HAD a will in place. "Almost all of my personal assets were tied into the Agency, and I didn't think it would be fair to you or Mildred to try and continue the Agency without me. So, I decided to make provisions to sell the non-cash assets of the Agency to another Private Investigation Firm, and all of the cash assets be divided up. You and Mildred each get 20%, and the remaining 60% is to be put into trust for my nephew and nieces to go to college. I had Mildred prepare some estimates for the net value of the company and its assets, and your share should give you at least a nest egg to start over with. Before the estate is divided up, it will purchase your apartment at the Rossmore and the Auburn so you can have those, they should belong to you after all this time anyway. If you and Mildred choose to form a new agency and start over again, that's your decision to make together. This was the best way to provide for my nephew and nieces. I hope you and Mildred understand my reasons."
Steele found himself nodding in agreement, and saw out the corner of his eye that his future self was doing the same thing. *How many thousands of times had this tape been watched the past 5 years?* "Second, I want you to know how much you have come to mean to me over the past four years. I tried to fight my feelings for you, put up walls, make you jump through hoops. No matter what I've done, you've stayed. Even when you left, when I drove you away really, you eventually came back with me. I've been very blessed to have you as part of my life, and I've never properly thanked you for that. Even you've done that much for me, remember when you were framed for that diamond theft, you thanked me. I never said thank you back. I should have, long before now, and so I'm saying it now. I wish I wasn't so afraid to say these things to your face. You deserve that, and hopefully someday I will. Then I'll have to borrow the equipment from my attorney and make a new set of tapes." Laura laughed and pulled her hair back over her ear, then leaned forward looking straight into the camera. Both Steeles sitting on the bed felt that she was looking right into his eyes, his heart, his soul. "I love you, Remington Steele. I don't care what your real name is or what your life was like before we met. All that matters is the person you are now, and the life you lead now - and that life is one we've shared the past four years." There is a pause as she takes a deep breath, "You know, I can't remember ever calling you Remington to your face. I think it's because I picture a typewriter instead of you. You've always been Mr. Steele to me, and maybe you always will be. I know some of your girlfriends have called you Remy but that is so not you. Anyway, it took what happened last week to make me understand what I feel for you, enough to vocalize it for this tape. Who knows when or if I'll ever be able to say it in person? It seems like a big risk, a scary risk. Hopefully someday I will - or you will. Because I think you feel the same way as I do, and are just as afraid as I am to put your feelings into words."
Steele glanced down at his hands, which he found were clasped tightly together in his lap. Laura was right - he was afraid of his feelings for her. He had never felt so strongly about a woman before and he didn't know what to do about it. He never wanted to stay in one place for long, but the thought of staying in one place with her for the rest of his life felt so... right somehow. He looked back up as Laura started to speak again, "Now, I know you're probably missing me - I hope you are anyway! But I want you to try and remember the good times we had together, the happy times, and find a new adventure to explore. But I have just one request of you - watch over Mildred for me. I'm sure she's going to be hurting too. I'm asking her to watch over you, and you to watch over her, so hopefully together you'll be able to move on and find happiness. Take care, Mr. Steele. Goodbye..." Laura gets up from the chair, moving to shut off the camera, and then it turns to static. The future Steele rewinds the tape and prepares to watch it again when the door chime rings. He gets up, sets the picture carefully down on top of the dresser and shuffles out of the bedroom towards the front door. Steele follows himself out into the living room. The future Steele runs a hand through his disheveled hair before opening the door. Mildred is standing behind the door with a small wrapped package and a small smile on her face, "Merry Christmas, Boss!" Steele backs away from the door and let's Mildred into the apartment. "You haven't worked for me for 5 years, Mildred, why do you still call me Boss?" She shrugs, "Habit, I guess." She looks around, taking in the mess, but not reacting, so this must be his normal way of living these days. "I brought you some fudge, I made it myself, have you eaten anything yet today?" "No, Mildred, I've been busy." He closes the door, turns on the lights, blinking at the brightness, and makes his way into the living room. Mildred has set the box of fudge down on the table and picked up the autographed pictures. "Every time I see these pictures, I think of Ms. Holt and how excited she was to find it for you." She carries the pictures around the sofa and sits down on one end. The future Steele sits at the opposite end of the couch, and Steele settles in one of the side chairs to listen to this exchange. Mildred looks much older, as if the past 5 years were more like 15. The past five years had obviously put a lot of stress on her. *How much of that stress was I the cause of?* Steele couldn't help but wonder.
"Tell me the story, Mildred." The future Steele said softly. "Oh kiddo, I tell you the story every year, aren't you tired of hearing it yet?" The future Steele shakes his head no, and settles into the sofa, "Please, Mildred." Mildred sighs, and looks down at the autographs before clearing a space for them on the coffee table and setting them down. "OK, well Ms. Holt wanted to get you a very special present for that Christmas. She was having a really hard time finding an autograph of Humphrey Bogart. So she asked me to help track one down. After about a month of searching, I got a lead on an estate sale for a man who was a gopher around the studio before becoming an editor. He had died and the family was selling off his collection, which included a Bogart autograph. Ms. Holt went to check it out, and came back that afternoon so excited. She said it was the perfect gift for you and she had to have it no matter what. She told me it was a double autograph of Bogart and Bacall, but even more amazing, it was made out to Remington. The man who died, his name was Edward Remington, but everyone around the studio called him Remington. She had gotten an estimate for what they expected it to go for at auction, and needed help with coming up with the money. She called your friend, Monroe, who was happy to help out. After the auction, he kept it safe until it got closer to Christmas. Ms. Holt told me that he paid for a third of it, she paid a third, and Daniel Chalmers paid the last third. Funny thing, he called for you one day and ended up talking to Ms. Holt for at least an hour on the phone, which was so surprising considering they never got along well. But I guess he wanted to help her with the gift. So as Christmas got closer, Monroe brought the pictures over to the office while you were at your tailor for a fitting. She showed it to me, and we just knew you would love it. Ms. Holt unwrapped one of the fake presents under the tree, put the picture frame in the box along with a card, and then re-wrapped it. We both stood there just smiling at each other, knowing you were going to have the best Christmas of your life. How could we have known instead of the best, it turned out to be the worst? Because of one drunk driver and that stupid accident, then learning about Daniel dying the next day on top of it all." Mildred turns to look at the future Steele, who has tears running down his face, staring down at the autographed pictures sitting on the coffee table. Mildred leans over and puts her hand on one of his, and he turns to look at her, "Oh Boss, I know it hurts that they are gone, but you have to start living your life again. You can't spend the rest of your life sitting here mourning them. Ms. Holt wouldn't want that, and I bet Daniel wouldn't want that either, you know that don't you?" He absently nods, and Mildred continues, "Look, why don't you come over to my house to have dinner? You could help me cook a really nice dinner for the two of us, and we can watch a movie with some popcorn, just you and me, what do you say, kiddo?" He absently nods again, then clears his throat, "I'll come, Mildred, let me clean up and I'll drive over in a couple of hours, OK?" "Do you promise to come, Boss?" He nods, "Yes Mildred, I give you my word and Remington Steele's word is his bond." Mildred grabs hold of his hand as she stands up and pulls him into a hug. He returns it with less enthusiasm, and she backs away. "If you're not there in three hours, I'm coming back with my key and I'll drag you over there myself." "Yes Mildred." She picks up her purse and lets herself out the apartment, looking back at him once from the doorway.
Steele is sitting in the side chair stunned at the effort Laura had gone through for this gift, this amazing gift just for him. How much love must you have for a person to work so hard just to give them a Merry Christmas? A thought niggled at the back of his mind and finally popped back to the front of his mind just as the future Steele reached for the autographs. *There was more than just a present, there was a question she wanted to ask me* The future Steele popped the back off of one of the pictures and pulled out a small envelope that was hidden there. Steele moved around behind the sofa so he could read over his own shoulder, and the future Steele opened up a simple Christmas card. Inside the card, written in Laura's ever neat handwriting, were two simple lines. "I love you with all my heart, Mr. Steele. With this gift, I ask if you will do me the honor of becoming my husband, sharing your life with mine, until death do us part?" The future Steele reached out and traced the words, the tears flowing again, "Yes, Laura. I would have said yes, if you had been given the chance to ask the question. You were so brave, so brave to ask, I never deserved you..." He put the card back in the envelope, put it back behind the picture, returned the picture to the table, and then paused staring down at the pictures. "My name isn't Remington Steele, my name is Harry Chalmers." He seemed to come to a decision, walked back to the front door, and put the chain lock in place. Walking back towards the bedroom, with Steele following him, he muttered over and over again, "I never deserved you... you deserved better than this..." He started the tape again, and then paused it once Laura's face settled on the screen. He traced her features on the television screen with his hands several times, then leaned down to kiss her image. "Goodbye, my love." He left the screen on, and turned towards the bathroom. He started the shower, and reached for his razor. Steele expected to see him reach for the shaving cream, but instead, he started to remove the blade from the razor. He turned towards the bathroom door to shut it, and Steele started at the complete and absolute despair in his future self's face, and knew he wasn't going to shave and take a shower in that room. As the door closed, Steele closed his eyes and he could picture his future self climbing into the shower and using the razor to slash his own wrists, and sitting down on the floor of the shower waiting to be with his Laura at last. Steele stumbled out into the living room, and there stood the Ghost, a silent witness to everything he had seen. "NO, this is wrong! Tell me, this future isn't locked in stone, it can be changed, is there no way this can be changed?"
He reached out wildly and grabbed the sleeve of the Ghost, and found himself back in the graveyard at the base of the hill. Now, there were 3 graves under the tree, and the third gravestone clearly lit by the moonlight read "Remington Harrison Daniel Chalmers Steele (1952-1992)". The grave in front of it was an open pit. A sobbing Mildred stood behind the gravestone, crying her eyes out. Steele can't imagine what poor Mildred must be feeling, knowing that three hours later on that Christmas day in 1992, she returned to his apartment, found it locked by the chain, probably called the police to force their way in, and they would have found his dead body in the bathroom. Just another victim of suicide. Another victim of a drunk driver from five years in the past. Steele turned towards the ghost in anger, "Answer me, I demand you answer me - can this future be changed, can Laura be saved?" He reached out towards the Ghost, brushing at the hood, which fell back to reveal Laura's face. However, instead of a bright happy Laura, her skin is deathly pale, her eyes a solid black and her mouth moving without making any sounds. She starts reaching for him, and he starts backing away from her in fear. He finds myself backing up the slope of the small hill, until he feels his footing give way and he begins to fall backwards into his own grave.