~Chapter Four~

Sleep Deprived

"...And then, afterwards, we visited King Tom in Ding Dong Dell," Esther told her father. "He's still having a feud with Dickory Dock, but he claims it hasn't been as irritating as it was last year. He sends his regards to you, father."

Rashaad smiled, giving a chuckle. "It seems your travels have been at a good pace. Visiting old friends, and not having too much trouble... it must have been wonderful," he said, while closing the folds of his tent, closing his stand for the night.

Swaine gave a quiet scoff. "Save for the beasts that are still running about," he commented.

"But nothing we couldn't handle," Esther retorted. "Honestly, Swaine, you act like it's the first time you had to fend off a Bonehead!"

"(better than travelling with the 'bonehead' beside me),"

"What?!"

"I said, you'd be sick of it too if you did it every day."

Rashaad chuckled, shaking his head. "Well, if you are so tired, you're more than welcome to stay in our home for the night," he offered.

"What?/Excuse me?" Esther and Swaine said at the same time, the former shocked while the latter was mildly surprised.

"I don't see a reason why you couldn't. You have been a great help to Oliver and my daughter on their journeys, and a good companion. You are welcome in my home, as any friend is."

"(provided he doesn't steal anything,)" Esther muttered quietly.

"What?" Swaine asked, giving her a look.

"I said it'll save you some guilders, not having to sleep at the Cat's Cradle,"

"Come, lets go in." Rashaad said, and they walked off.

Swaine paused, however, looking over his shoulder at a girl who had walked by, with long black hair tied back with a piece of fabric, and a holster on her side. Something about her drew his attention, but what?

Esther called him back to reality, and he shook his head, following them around the corner. The girl probably wasn't important, anyway.

*0*0*0*

The trio had a quick dinner, followed by exchanging more stories, before Rashaad decided to turn in...

It was then Esther realized they didn't have a guest-room. She and her father lived in a small apartment in the city, with a balcony overlooking the milk fountains, and two small bedrooms, dining area, and sitting room... but no space for company to spend the night.

She figured Swaine could sleep on the couch, or camp out on the floor.

If he wanted to sleep at all, as the thief was standing out on the balcony, looking up at the stars. Esther stood in the doorway. "I'm heading to bed," she said to him, then- because her father taught her to be polite when having guests- added, "Go ahead and make yourself comfortable anywhere you want,"

"Alright, thanks." Swaine answered, walking back inside... towards her room!

She trudged after him. "I didn't mean in MY room," she said bitterly, yet kept her voice low so her father wouldn't hear.

"Hey, you said I could make myself comfortable anywhere I wanted... and your room looks the most comfortable." he smirked.

Esther felt a vein throb in her forehead. "You know I didn't mean there... why don't you sleep on the couch, or on one of our throw-cushions?"

"Fine, whatever you say... as long as I'm not poking fun at your collection of dolls, right?"

Esther rolled her eyes. "GOODNIGHT, Swaine," she muttered, heading into her room, closing the curtain. She heard Swaine chuckle to himself before walking away, and shook her head, then changed into some pyjamas.

The familiar-tamer lied down on her bed, consisting of large plush pillows on a large circular mattress, staring up at the ceiling...

That's when she began to feel uneasy. Having spent so many days either sleeping under the stars or in the decorative rooms of the Cat's Cradle, it felt weird sleeping in her own bedroom again, as if it were a foreign environment now. She let out a sigh, shutting her eyes and deciding to think of pleasant thoughts until she fell asleep, thinking of how comfortable it felt to be home again and not having to keep watch or pay for a room to sleep in...

Before she could drift off, she heard shuffling out in the living room. It had better be father sneaking a late-night snack... she thought bitterly. Her father had a rare tendency to snag a bite from the kitchen (even Great Sages have their own habits), but she knew in her mind exactly who could still be awake.

Getting out of bed, she poked her head out from behind the curtain of her room, seeing Swaine pacing in the living room. "Swaine?" she called out in a whisper, getting his attention. "What are you still doing up? It's the middle of the night!"

"Sorry, I forgot how much 'beauty sleep' you need," he remarked. "Another good 24 hours should make up for it."

Esther shook her head- no matter what time of the day (or night) it was, the thief always had some comment to make. She might as well had turned and gone back to bed, but the fact that Swaine was still up kept her mind from agreeing on that suggestion. There were many reasons on why the older man could be up: Perhaps he was used to staying up so late in their travels that he had grown used to lack of sleep (despite how much he complained about it); Maybe there was something on his mind keeping him awake; Or... he wanted to swipe something but Esther caught him before he could make an attempt- that last part was more of a joke, as her friend gave up thieving the day Oliver mended his broken heart.

Whatever the reason could be, she knew she wouldn't be able to rest until she found out what it was, settled the matter, and made sure Swaine stopped his pacing. It amazed her that anything could keep him up, anyway, considering he was the only one in the group who would immediately hit the mattress the moment they checked into a Cat's Cradle, and would sleep the whole night and even half the morning, giving a killing glance at anyone who kept him up or woke him from his slumber (Mr. Drippy learned that the hard way, once).

"Cut it out with the smart-remarks, and just tell me what's keeping you up," Esther sighed, way too tired to argue with him right now.

Swaine shrugged, stroding over to a window, leaning against it. "Just been thinking, that's all." he answered, casually. "Minds as large as mine never sleep, you know."

The desert-girl rolled her eyes- a number of insults came to mind, but she knew from experience it would lead to an arguement, and as loud as they could get with their bickering her father would no doubt be awoken in moments, angrily demanding they cease their fight- and his mood could rival Swaine's any day.

"I see. What's on your mind?" she asked instead, walking over.

Swaine only shrugged. He wasn't one to really exchange feelings or share thoughts- unless he was giving criticism or complaining- but he had changed somewhat since then. Plus, he figured talking would help ease whatever was on his mind and help him get some sleep. "Quite a bit," he started. "I've been thinking about travelling,"

"Where to? We've been practically everywhere,"

Swaine shook his head. "I don't mean where to go, but more like where I've been... I've been thinking about how much has changed since I first ran away. I had to go it alone for years, used to looking out for myself, decieving and cheating others in order to survive... then one day I just stopped caring, taking whatever I wanted whether I needed it or not. Until the day I heard Hamelin had changed and something was going on with Marcassin, and was desperate to get back. That was the time I met you lot, got my heart mended, and took to travelling.

"Honestly, I didn't know what all I was getting into, 'til Shadar caused that Eye of the Storm. But even after that, I still pressed on with you all, just to help out my brother. After helping him out... I guess I wasn't paying attention at completing my goal, then focused on helping you with your quest." he paused, sighing heavily as he walked out onto the balcony, looking up at the stars as he had been doing earlier that evening. "Now that it's all over... I guess I'm trying to figure out what to do next."

Esther stood beside him, knowing where he was coming from. She, too, pondered what to do with her life now that their adventure had come to an end. Perhaps that's why he asked her to join her in his travels in the first place.

"Though, every time I went out on my own, before you came along, all I thought about was what I had been like the first time, thinking about all the horrible things I've done... That's what's keeping me awake now." he finished. "A rotten feeling guilt is, I must confess. I was hoping that, after helping Oliver save the world, the weight would be lifted off my shoulders, but the sinking feeling is still there."

"Maybe there's more you could do," Esther suggested. "Think about all the people you cheated, and find a way to make amends."

Swaine gave her a look. "You really think that would help? I've done some awful things, Esther... you really think they would forgive me?"

She shrugged. "It's the best you could do. Some might forgive you, others might take some time... but the feeling won't go away unless you try."

The thief nodded. "Well, if the White- er, if Cassiopeia can make amends, I might as well take a wing at it."

"I'll come along too," Esther suddenly offered. She had no idea where it came from- perhaps, talking about a friend seeking redemption for his sins, she wanted to show support. "I mean, if you need a hand. No one should do it alone,"

Swaine chuckled. "I don't think I need help apologizing... but you have a point, it would be best if I had some support." he blinked a bit, shaking his head as if confused. "Damn, sleep-deprivation is starting to get to me... 'better turn in before I start talking crazy, eh?"

Esther gave a scoff. "Too late." They walked back inside, and the thief walked over to the couch, sitting on it and leaning back, still looking deep in thought. The desert-girl knew she wouldn't sleep if she knew he was alone with his thoughts. "Swaine," she whispered, getting his attention once more. "If you want, you can share my room,"

He began to laugh. "Now look who's talking crazy." he stood up, walking over to her room with her. "Alright, then- a thief never turns down a good offer."

Esther rolled her eyes. Entering her room, she grabbed a couple pillows and a blanket, handing them to him to sleep on, before lying down on her own bed, while he slept at the end of it. "Goodnight, Swaine."

"'Night..." Swaine said, yawning. A lot still preyed on his mind- where to start with this new goal of his, who all he had wronged... telling his friend what he had done...

There was something from his past that he deeply regretted, though unlike lying and stealing, he knew it would be impossible to amend.

Sleep began to overcome him, however, and decided it would be best not to worry about it until the time drew near. He covered up with his blankets, curling up at the foot of the circular pillow-of-a-bed, drifting off.

For some reason, he thought back to that girl he saw in the marketplace, wondering where he had seen her before...

*0*0*0*

A/N: Alright, it took me a LOT of strength not to turn this into a Swaine/Esther fluff (I'll save that for another time). Right now, trying to focus one-plot-at-a-time here...

So, yep, looks like this duo will be going on a new quest based on redeeming Swaine's conscience... and don't worry, folks, Oliver will be showing up soon enough to join them ;)

Please review and share constructive criticism. Do not flame.