Naw then lads and lasses.
Thanks again for the nice reviews. I always enjoy a little encouragement.
Now if some of you could make a little effort to let me know what they think of my writing... Please protect me from the evil writer's block and I'll be eternally thankful. ;p
The mood is still a bit angsty, but it will lighten with each chapter. I have a great need for fluffyness, but it's too soon for that.
I'm aware the rythm is a bit slow, and not much is happening, but this fic is mostly focused on the healing of the mind and heart... I just hope you're not bored... --'
Standard disclaimer and warnings applies.
Anyway, enjoy!!
Chap 4: Hope; Shooting star
The subtle scents of the clearing were significantly damped by the late spring mist, as the sing song of the nightingale announced the pre dawn hours to the neighbouring inhabitants.
The miko shifted in her sleep, again, and his massive clawed hand came on top of the crown of her head to calm her unconscious fears. This had become some sort of routine for him, reassuring her to ensure she had a healthy amount of rest, and not endless hours of terror inducing nightmares.
When Rin had come into his care, he had had to let the child snuggle deep into his tail to sleep peacefully. The alternative had been very annoying to his inuyoukai highly developed senses, the smell of her tears and her pitiful sounds of obvious distress calling to his protective nature.
Though, as with the Miko, he never had indulged in such inappropriate demeanour when she had been awake and conscious. This was just one side of his personality he preferred to keep for himself.
And human females had this penchant for confusing pack instinct with sentimentalism anyway. He snorted inwardly. This could really prove to be problematic. He didn't even know he had this sort of behaviour ingrained deep in this stone hard heart of his before Rin.
He would never say aloud to a living soul that it was a mere mortal child's doing, though.
He sighed... again. He was doing it a lot lately, he mused.
Had anybody told him, some years ago, that he would have to take his troublesome half brother's miko under his care, he would have smirked, his "I-m-going-to-disembowel-someone-and-bathe-in-his-fuming-entrails" smirk, and then he would have done just that. He was not someone for empty threats.
Now... It was different. He had changed. His ever smiling ward had awoken a part of him he didn't even acknowledge before. He was inu, his animal counterpart a social creature for whom pack ties were everything. And as youkais were the spiritual expression of the very nature of one animal, he had simply hidden a part of his soul under heavy layers of pain and hate.
More than two centuries later, he finally understood why his father had asked him that last question. The will to protect was deep in every inuyoukai, refusing it was the greatest weakness of all.
Even Inuyasha, a mere half breed, had been fiercely protective. Begrudgingly, Sesshoumaru accepted now to see that his brother had bettered him... in this aspect alone, though.
But, as if he had to adorn a second skin too big for him, he still experienced difficulties in adjusting to this particular part of his instincts. Perhaps the Miko's predicament would provide a good opportunity to train? Not that he would take advantage of such a crisis in her life, but killing two birds with one stone had always been one of his favourite sayings.
He looked closer at her.
Her midnight locks were entangled with his long ivory fingers, the contrast making them nearly ethereal. Her hair was nearly rough, and had lost the gloss he had known it had initially possessed. Her face was sickly pale, though she seemed to have regained a bit of her normal composure, in her sleep at least. Dark bruises and shallow cuts still marred the creamy silk of her skin and her lithe figure seemed lost in the wide expanse of soft fabric of his haori. She seemed lost, a frail pool of beating life almost hidden in a sea of silver fur and white silk.
He refrained from gathering her weakened body in his lap... Again.
The need to soothe her was nearly painful for the usually stoic Daiyoukai, and even Rin had never induced such urges in him.
He had learned to respect her as the warrior she was and knew she reciprocated the feeling. Her forgiving and selfless nature had touched him deeply and to witness the hurt that was threatening her very equilibrium was something he could have done without.
No human could have earned the right to be happy more than her, and yet this right had been ripped from her brutally.
A slight shift in her aura interrupted his musings, as she was close to her wakening. He moved away from her reluctantly, allowing his body to lie a few feet from her against a tree. He let his lids fall over his golden gaze, faking the slumber he didn't need.
She was like a frightened wild animal. He just had to tame her and make her trust him enough for him to help her healing.
Taming an animal was something he knew how to do, as he was one himself.
She knew she was staring, but she just couldn't avert her eyes from the seemingly sleeping male not far from her.
The colours marring the sky announcing dawn set his silvery hair on purple fire, coating his finely chiselled features in an eerie glow. He seemed surreal, more than usual that is, his visage so serene and calm that she could almost forget all the times she had seen it split by a cruel smirk or a life threatening glare.
She had seen less of those directed towards her as years had passed though, thankfully. He had even saved her life on occasions, and now she was apparently under his protection for the time being.
That was a good thing, she thought. She didn't want her friends to discover what had happened to her. Ever.
Not that they wouldn't want to help her, but she didn't want to see pity in their eyes. At this time and age, not being a virgin any more sentenced a woman to die without a husband. Even when non consensual, a woman was considered impure, defiled.
No one would want her now. No human anyway.
And Inuyasha... If he had known what was planned for her future, would he still have gone to rejoin his last love? Would he have protected her?
Would he have left her alone?
Tears brimming in her eyes, she swallowed the sob that was threatening to escape from her lips. Hugging tightly the furry warmth she had been sleeping in, she burrowed her face in it, revelling in the illusion of safeness it procured.
She had remembered that she had fallen asleep curled up in a blanket, but now the youkai's tail was securely wrapped around her and she was deeply thankful for it. Despite all appearances, Sesshoumaru seemed to want to help her. She couldn't decipher his reasons but she didn't bite the hand that fed. He had told her why, in his unique way, and it was already very unusual for him to explain his actions.
Whatever his goal was, she knew he wouldn't harm her intentionally. She trusted him, in some crooked and weird way.
When she let her head surface from the heavy sea of silver fur, watery sapphire locked to liquid gold as their eyes met. Blushing furiously, she averted her gaze after a few seconds when he had seemed to pierce her very soul with the intense fire of his own.
"Good morning Sesshoumaru" She stuttered, her voice still coarse.
"Have you slept well, Miko?" He asked, his face set in his usual disinterested mask.
"Yes, thank you. I could get used to it." She warned, still caressing the youkai's tail dreamily.
He snorted, an amused glint crossing his amber orbs. The already rosy hue of her cheeks turned to a darker shade of red.
"You should get up now. I will start training after the first hour of sunlight, I suggest you do the same. Rin must be up by now, probably providing to break the fast." Still seated near her, he was waiting for her to extract herself from her improvised bedroll.
"This training... I mean... You wanted to teach me something?" Wide navy blue eyes gleamed with anticipation.
He chuckled low, the sound making her jump.
"This Sesshoumaru knows nothing of Miko training. You could use some knowledge about mastering your body though. You should try to overcome your weakness in the matter. In this, I can help. Don't expect this Sesshoumaru to be soft on you, Miko, but Rin follows my teachings quite unscathed." His eyes were still scrutinising her, assessing her non-verbal response to his suggestion.
"Oh... Okay then... But I must meditate first... It's been a long time and I feel I need to rearrange my mind in some way." She started to squirm, extracting her body from the warmth of the fur with a displeased sigh and a shudder.
"Indeed."
That's when she realised she was still wearing his haori. Creating a new nuance of red just for his amused perusal, she seemed suddenly absorbed by the contemplation of her bare feet in the damp grass. He waited a few minutes, just for his own enjoyment of her embarrassed state, and then spoke again in his deep emotionless voice.
"Rin will provide a change of clothing." His features never betrayed the mirth he felt in reality.
Turning his back to her in a flurry of white and silver silk, he walked regally towards the shallow pool, leaving a stunned miko in his wake.
He was naked.
Well, almost. A loincloth never really counted as an overly covering garment. Water droplets sliding along his pale skin, his wet hair clung to his muscular back.
While he bathed, the poor miko asked herself if she was doomed to stay in a blushing state all her human life. Not that she found the view annoying or anything, but it impaired her capacity to think properly.
Rin was cleaning herself a few feet from him, wearing only feudal undergarments. She didn't seem to be upset in any way at the intimacy she shared with her protector. Well, in Japan, it was customary for children to bathe with their fathers, but Kagome hadn't realised the bond they shared was this strong. They both seemed to be relaxed in each other's company, seemingly free of any human taboo concerning nudity.
She had washed herself sooner in the morning and now she was supposed to meditate... Well, she was trying to... And failing miserably.
Instead, she was staring at the handsome nude youkai through her lashes, eyes half closed. Blushing.
Somehow, the rational part of her mind was pleased to know that she could still enjoy male beauty. She had been truly afraid she had lost all interest in this kind of area.
Shaking herself forcefully out of her dazed state, she turned her back to the pond swiftly, groaning under her breath about perfect bodies and the injustice of cellulite.
Focusing on her heartbeat again, she plunged into the source of all power. Spectator to her own muddled thoughts, she watched them pass with a dispassionate eye, totally detached from them. They became less abundant, less demanding of her attention. And then there were no more thoughts, her mind, peaceful at last, drifted to a state of complete awareness.
She was the wind caressing the soft blades of grass, she was the sunbeam warming Earth and all living things. She was the white cloud swimming in a perfect blue sky, she was the small butterfly and the powerful eagle. She was the Daiyoukai and his little girl, giggling with girlish glee as she watched little fishes tickling her toes. And she was the ominous pulsing of all life forces, her heart beating in harmony with its rhythm.
She visualised a golden orb in the centre of her chest and dived into its depths, relishing in the simple sense of rightness it gave her. After a while, she finally attained the core of her being, her soul.
An immense ball of pink light greeted her, beating in unison with the pulse of her flesh. But it was different than usual, threads of sickly purple hue coating the surface.
Instinctively, she knew what it was. It was her human mind hindering its functioning, nurtured by the very trauma she had to endure. Thus, her link with her soul was faltering, weakening the spread of her miko powers. She could call to them, but they would respond the same way they had when she had been sealed.
With a determined grunt, she started to peal the glowing wires, flinching at the unpleasant sensation running up and down her spine.
After having removed only a few, she was jerked forcefully out of her meditation, her body falling with the force of the interruption.
She found herself on her back, panting and sweating, her limbs spread apart. She had no strength left and couldn't move, trying desperately to regain her composure.
A shadow was looming over her vulnerable form and she winced, unable even to move her head to see who it was. Fortunately, it spoke before she had to panic.
"Miko." He said, as if this single word could carry his concern and inquiry about her health at the same time. In fact... it did.
"Huh... This was unexpected..." she said, still flat on the hard floor and unable to move.
"Your meditation." It was a statement.
"Yea... Some thing's around my soul, blocking most of my power. I tried to unleash it... But it repelled me after a short while. And now I can't move any more." He tone was levelled, matter of factly. He appreciated the absence of complaining or whining in her voice.
He picked up one of her wrists carefully and let it fall limply on the grass. He snorted derisively.
"It should wear off in a short while. But I suggest you do not meditate unless this Sesshoumaru is near. You are vulnerable."
"Why... Thank you!" She croaked, sarcasm coating every word.
"Get up now, Rin has prepared lunch for both of you." He smirked, amusement shining in his golden gaze.
Kagome tried to squirm, struggling to regain her lost control over her body. A few minutes later, she was on her feet, walking carefully towards the girl on the other side of the clearing. A fire was burning near her, the enticing smell of cooking fish making her drool. She hadn't realised it was that late but now her stomach was protesting against the deprivation.
She had been out for nearly three hours.
After having let the humans sustain their need for food, Sesshoumaru started the physical training.
At first, it was with a succession of slow movements. It reminded the miko of a martial art from the continent. Tai chi chuan, she explained in her usual unending blabbering.
Copying the graceful undulations of the ethereal being was not simple for such a clumsy girl, but she persisted, focusing on him as if he was her life line. Hypnotised by the slow swaying of his lengthy limbs, she moved if not with accuracy but in harmony with his own rhythm. Her breathing slowed down, becoming more even with the raise and fall of her arms.
The pace was set faster after that, the two girls sparring against each other with wooden swords. Rin was a far better fighter than the miko, so she had to count only on her bare reflexes to parry each of her blows.
A few bruises later, she gritted her teeth in frustration. Seething, she lunged forward with a loud cry and then forced her bokken to loop to the left, feinting a direct blow and then attacking to her right side.
Rin jumped backward, surprised by the sudden change in rhythm, and charged the miko again, her face constantly set in a cold mask. She was stunned to see her miko friend growling threateningly like an animal, sneering with each blow she dealt.
Sesshoumaru had always insisted on the necessity to conceal one's emotions when fighting and Rin had obediently complied. On the other hand, Kagome was an open book, displaying all she felt for everyone to see.
She was a fierce opponent despite her inexperience in close combat, and the girl enjoyed the sparring greatly.
After nearly three hours, the two young women stopped, panting heavily. They went to the pool directly to cool off, under the gaze of their amused protector.
For a short moment, the miko had forgotten she was suffering and had giggled nearly merrily with her female friend. The youkai was internally relieved, he could hope to see her with a genuine smile brightening her features in a not so distant future.