Note/Disclaimer: Part of the fun of this for me is creating the part of DW's characters that we don't get to see. This series is all about that…and about my hopes for #Tuckson. I've had some comments about this being a bit OOC…and I get it…but I'm making my best guess about how these characters would act if they were "real life."
Confessions and Competition
Sarah looked up from her cards and caught a glimpse of Noah lounging in the Papasan with his pile of Hot Wheels, his bear, and some assorted Legos. Of course, the floor would have been a more appropriate venue for cars and blocks, but he had been obsessed with the large, round chair from the moment he saw it. "Olivia, Noah is so good," she marveled. "Does he ever cry? Or whine? Or throw a total tantrum, like, kicking and screaming?"
"Not very often," Olivia said proudly, "Usually only when he's sick. Or tired."
"Well, if I am guaranteed children that well-behaved I would have six or seven," Sarah proclaimed, not really thinking about her audience.
Both Tucker and Jeff raised their eyebrows.
Brooke cracked up as she played her turn. Tonight's game was rummy and she and Ed were neck-and-neck at the top of the leaderboard. "Oooooweeee," she sang, "You, sister, sure know how to raise Dad's blood pressure," she inspected the sets laid out around the table and placed two more cards down, "And Jeff's."
"Oh come on," Sarah retorted as if she and Brooke were the only two people in the room, "Daddy knows someday he'll also be granddaddy. But I was just speaking hypothetically. It was a compliment. For Olivia. Relax." Sarah was sitting, appropriately, between Ed and Jeff at the round table. She leaned over and gave her dad a playful half-hug.
Tucker set his jaw and tried to act irritated, but Brooke changed the subject. "Jeez, Dad, you are red."
Olivia was on the other side of Ed, and she placed a hand on his cheek. It was boiling. "Oh, Ed, let me get you some aloe."
He protested mildly, but his face did hurt, so he let Olivia retrieve the aloe from the bathroom. When she returned, she smeared the gel on his cheeks and forehead. Brooke noticed him lightly run his fingers along the back of her bare leg as she stood over him, but Ed's oldest daughter didn't pounce on the opportunity to tease him. Maybe later.
Earlier that afternoon, the three women left the boys at home to hang out at the pool while they took a drive to the various Outer Banks shops to look around and have lunch. Noah, Jeff, and Ed planned to hang out at the pool for a little while and then wander down the beach to have a happy hour cocktail.
"At least Noah appears to have been properly sunscreened," Brooke reported, peering over at Noah. "And, Jeff, well, you were already sunburned. Are you making up that story about working for the Phillies?"
He shot her a look reminiscent of an annoyed little brother, "No. But I also golf. And play tennis. And bike."
"The perks of working at night!" Sarah pointed out.
Olivia finished attending to Ed's sunburn and went to the kitchen to wash her hands. "Does anyone need anything?" She asked.
"I'll take another beer," Tucker requested. He'd been drinking almost all day but he didn't care. He was on vacation.
Olivia handed him a bottle of the local IPA he liked, touching it first to his neck. He shuddered.
"Sorry," she apologized playfully and gave him a peck on top of the head.
Sarah noticed the kiss. She also noticed the kisses on the beach. And the hand-holding on the balcony. Buoyed by alcohol-fueled courage, she cooed, "You two are so cute!"
Tucker glowered at her, hoping to convince Sarah he was annoyed.
She knew better. "Brooke, don't you think they're adorable?"
"Yes."
Sarah looked curiously at her father with her big blue eyes sparkling. "So did you notice we were low on sunblock so you gave it all to Noah? Is that what happened? Very gallant."
The entire group, including Ed, burst into laughter.
Noah, startled and suddenly interested in what the adults were doing, struggled to wiggle out of the chair. Ed rushed over to help him. "Come on over here with us, bud, we need more men at this table." Tucker took his seat, this time with Noah in his lap, and examined his cards. "Here," Ed directed him, "put these two down." Noah did as he was told. Ed did the same thing with another card, then another, until he was out. "We win that one," he told Noah.
"Yay!" Olivia prompted him. "You and Tuck win!"
"Yay!" Noah repeated, waving his arms around, almost knocking over Ed's beer. Tucker grabbed it just in time.
"Another hand?" Jeff asked.
"Yes," Sarah said, grabbing the messy pile of cards. "And I need another, something. What do we have? I'm sick of this beer."
"We have too much alcohol here," Tucker said wryly.
She turned her bright blue eyes on Jeff, "Sweetie will you make me a gin-and-tonic?"
Jeff obliged.
Sarah was not finished interrogating her father. "Daddy, did you tell Noah to call you 'Tuck' or did he do that on his own?"
Ed looked at Olivia. "That was all Noah," Olivia answered.
"Adorable," Brooke remarked.
Sarah giggled, "Remember when one of us brought friends home and they would say 'Mister Tucker' instead of whatever Dad was at the time? And Dad would correct them. Like, they would say 'Mister' and before they said 'Tucker,' he'd interrupt and say, 'Sergeant.' So funny."
Brooke rolled her eyes. "Now it is."
Ed whispered to Noah, but he made sure it was loud enough so everyone could hear. "Noah promise me when you are sitting here twenty years from now you will not torment me the way the girls do." Noah reached up and patted Tucker just below the ear as if he understood. I got you, Tuck.
It wasn't long before Noah, who had been consistently staying up well past his bedtime on this vacation, was nodding off in Ed's arms. Tucker cradled him and played cards one-handed, not particularly eager to put him down.
At the conclusion of yet another game, Olivia yawned and announced she was turning in for the night. Wine, sun, shopping, and food had overcome her. She took Noah and wished everyone goodnight.
"I'll be in soon," Ed told her.
When it was apparent neither Jeff nor Sarah were going to usurp Brook and Ed at the top of the leaderboard, they turned in as well. Brooke and Ed decided to continue the battle for first place.
"Dad, can we take a quick break?"
Ed nodded. Sarah found her purse and took out two cigarettes. She held one out to Ed, "Are you still smoking?"
"I've been trying not to. And I thought you quit?"
"It's hard when I'm drinking. And I've been drinking a lot today."
"Well, I started back up after the mess Eugene got me into."
They moved out to the balcony. Brooke lit her smoke and passed the lighter to Tucker. They stood at the railing looking out into the ocean.
"I really like Olivia, Dad."
"I do too."
Brooke stared at him until he met her gaze. "I think you more than like her."
"You're right."
"I've never seen you act like this with anyone before. Not even mom."
"Brooke," Ed was matter-of-fact, "Your mom and I were having a rough time long before we got divorced. But we were in love once."
"But the way you look at Olivia. And you even touch her and kiss her in front of everybody. It's like you're a different guy. It's good. I like it."
"We had to keep things under wraps for so long," Ed mused, "It feels good to not have to hide. And I certainly don't want to keep it a secret around you and Sarah."
"Of course not," Brooke replied, "And Noah loves you."
"He warmed up to me quickly," Ed boasted. "And I wasn't sure how that would all go, how we would work when it had to be the three of us, but it's great."
Brooke was absolutely intrigued. She had never heard her father talk like this before. Even his voice—it was usually so edgy and harsh and now it was gentle and kind of compassionate albeit still gravelly and unmistakably that of a police officer. She decided to press him further. "Are you living together?"
Ed blew a stream of smoke away from Brooke, "No. But I think I have more clothes at her place than at mine."
"Do you want to live together?"
Tucker shrugged. "It's up to her. Things are really good right now. I don't want to press the issue if she's not ready to talk about it."
Brooke nodded, understanding his point. "We had fun today shopping."
"Buy anything?"
"I didn't. Olivia got those two shirts for Noah. Sarah, of course, bought like five sundresses."
Ed forced an exasperated laugh. "I don't know what we're going to do with her. I hope Jeff makes a lot of money."
Brooke looked down, trying to hide her smile. You could not fool her Dad. He knows Sarah is lying about how long she and Jeff have been together.
She was right. Ed knew. He hadn't known at first, but seeing how comfortable they were with one another gave them away.
"What?" Tucker asked her.
Brooke stubbed out her cigarette in the nearby fern. "Nothing. You want another one?"
"One more. And will you bring the bourbon out here?"
She returned with the bottle, two glasses, and the pack of cigarettes.
Tucker poured each of them a bourbon and lit another smoke. For a while they sat across from one another in contemplative silence. Both Brooke and Ed cherished these talks. They usually occurred on birthdays or Christmases or other holidays when they were all together and the others had either gone home or were asleep.
Brooke had recently cut her hair into a chin-length bob which made her appear older and more sophisticated. With Sarah, Tucker felt like he was looking into a mirror, but Brooke was more of a combination of him and his ex-wife. Her features were softer, her face round, and even though she was just as good-natured and fun-loving as Sarah, Brooke was more thoughtful and less spontaneous. She was a good listener, and for as young as she was, she had keen insight.
"You know," Brooke started talking again, curiosity in her voice, "when we were at lunch today, Olivia said she'd never been married. I can't believe that."
Ed furrowed his brow, "How did you get on that subject?"
"Guess." she replied sarcastically.
Dumb question-Sarah.
"Well, when you have jobs like ours a lot of times you get married to it," Ed pointed out reflectively, "and you kind of forget time is passing."
"And she told us all about rescuing Noah and the judge surprising her with the foster care and then the adoption. So awesome."
Ed stared over at Brooke, stunned that Olivia had opened up so much to her and Sarah. Wait…Sarah. Sarah the loose cannon. What else did she ask Olivia? "How did Sarah manage to get her going on that?" Ed asked cautiously.
"She didn't. We were just talking about being in SVU. She said most detectives don't last very long, but she loves it and feels a higher purpose in it. Then she mentioned if it weren't for her job she probably never would have gotten Noah."
Tucker was relieved. He had been concerned because Sarah often spoke without thinking, and she most likely knew about the William Lewis trial which had not been just New York news; it had been covered throughout the region, including Philadelphia where she lived. He hoped Sarah would have enough sense to keep her questions about Lewis to herself if she had realized that his Olivia Benson was that Olivia Benson.
Ed wondered what else Olivia had revealed about Noah. Would she have told them about Johnny D, too? No, Ed decided, she wouldn't have a reason to go there with the girls. It didn't matter now. "Well you got a lot of information this afternoon," he concluded, smiling over at Brooke and downing the rest of his bourbon.
"We did."
Ed noticed Brooke looking fixedly at him the way he imagined she stared at the disobedient middle schoolers she taught. "What?"
"Don't screw this up, Dad." She warned.
He seemed hurt. "Why would I do that?"
She shrugged. "I'm just saying."
And slurring, Ed thought. It was time to go to bed. He'd had enough for the night.
"You want help with the sofa bed?"
"No, I got it." Brooke stretched out on the loveseat and lit another cigarette.
"Don't fall asleep out here."
"I won't."
"And don't fall asleep with your cigarette lit."
She gave him a tipsy salute. "Kiss Olivia for me."
…
Ed undressed in the bathroom, brushed his teeth and washed his face, neck, and hands, trying to mask the smell of cigarettes. He crawled into bed next to Olivia, clad only in boxers, and nuzzled her a little more aggressively than he normally would, trying to wake her. She stirred ever so slightly but did not open her eyes. He kissed her bare shoulder, then her neck, then her cheek and pulled her body against his.
"Liv," he whispered.
"Mmmmm."
Progress.
"Lieutenant," he whispered again, this time directly in her ear, running his tongue along her earlobe.
Her lips formed a faint smile and she mumbled something incoherently.
Undeterred, he stroked her stomach with his fingertips and kissed her again on the cheek and neck.
She reached behind her and caressed the back of his head, still refusing to fully come out of what had been a peaceful slumber.
"Liv."
"Hmmm?"
"Wake up."
"Ed," she mumbled, "Noah…"
"I just want to kiss you."
She turned towards him and opened her eyes slightly. "Riiight."
"And tell you something."
She opened her eyes wider as he played with her hair, waiting impatiently for her to come to consciousness.
She could smell the salty beach air on him. His warm breath was full of alcohol and mouthwash, and, yes, cigarettes.
"Tell me what?" She rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand, smearing what was left of her mascara and eyeshadow. She was so tired when she collapsed in bed that she hadn't bothered to wipe off her makeup.
"Look at me," he insisted.
Their eyes met—hers dark and sleepy, his blue and shimmering with desire.
He took a deep breath. "Olivia. You're the best thing to happen to me since Brooke and Sarah were born." Another breath. "I'm…so…in love with you. I will always love you. I always want to be with you."
He had her attention now. Part of her assumed he was drunk and rambling, but she was so enraptured by what he'd just said she decided to take it at face value. "Ed," she murmured. "I…"
Tucker put a finger over her lips. "No, no, don't say anything." He held her tightly as he began kissing her. He concentrated hard on what he was doing, wanting the kiss to be absolutely perfect, to communicate to her via his lips and tongue that he was permanently hers if she wanted it to be that way. Respecting that Noah was five feet away in his portable toddler bed, he kept his hands outside of Olivia's clothes, locking her in a possessive embrace, taking pleasure in the simplicity of her body against his and loving that, for all her sleepiness, she kissed back with equal gusto.
When they finally pulled away from one another's lips, Tucker refused to let her go. "Stay like this," he commanded, craving the comfort of her head on his chest.
Olivia fell back asleep easily in Ed's arms. They often fell asleep wrapped up with one another, but rarely did they remain that way for the entire night. Tonight, though, Ed kept his arms slung around her, even when one limb became numb, and even when he finally fell into his own deep, contented sleep.
…..
The next morning, every adult in the condo felt the effects of the previous day's alcohol binge.
"Well," Sarah announced resolutely as she shook a bottle of Bloody Mary Mix, "There is nothing else to do but get right back on the horse."
Brooke and Jeff glared at her with disgust.
"You don't want one?" Sarah asked, disappointed. "We have all the stuff to go with it-olives, celery, lemon, lime…vodka…c'mon, you'll feel better."
"Fine," Brooke conceded, "and I'm sure Dad'll make breakfast."
Jeff's face hadn't seen a razor since they'd arrived and he looked extra scruffy in addition to being haggard from yesterday. His voice was hoarse, "Where are they?"
"Took Noah for a walk on the beach."
"Man," Jeff marveled, "Your dad can drink."
"How much did you drink before we came back from shopping?" Brooke asked.
Jeff thought. "Let's see. We took a six pack to the pool and split it. Then we went down the street to that oyster bar and had some oysters and more beer and then on the way back stopped for a couple of vodka tonics. Then we came back and, well, you were here."
Sarah shook her head with mock shame, "Poor Noah, looked after by drunks, barhopping at the age of two. Did you at least feed him?"
"He ate a lot of junk. Chicken fingers, cookies, ice cream…I'm surprised he ate dinner."
Brooke rifled through her purse searching for Advil or Tylenol…anything to take care of her splitting headache. She found nothing. "Does anyone have any ibuprofen or something?"
"I just have vodka," Sarah replied sassily, sliding an expertly garnished tumbler across the kitchen island toward her sister. "Go look in Dad's bathroom, I'm sure he has something."
Brooke hesitated, "I'm not going in there. It's kind of Olivia's space, too."
"Oh, please," Sarah scoffed. "It's just the medicine cabinet. What do you think, he has, like, sex tapes playing on a loop in there or something?" Jeff and Brooke both laughed as Sarah darted in and out of the bedroom but came back empty-handed. "Nothing," she reported. "Sorry." She took a sip of her drink and looked pleased with her bartending skills. "So it does look like they're sleeping together."
"Uh, hel-lo? Duh." Brooke shot her sister an incredulous glance. "Of course they're sleeping together, and by sleeping I mean not just sleeping. Dad's been talking about her for months now. You didn't think they were doing it?
"It's just funny to see him in boyfriend mode," Sarah went over and hugged Jeff by the neck, "He's like, so, ga-ga over her. Like you are with me," she told Jeff and gave him a peck on the cheek. "Maybe now is the time to tell him we're going to move in together."
"I don't think that's a good idea," Jeff said.
Brooke agreed. "Don't do it. You don't know how he'll react and we still have two more days here."
"Maybe I should have Olivia sort of, well, get him used to the idea," Sarah thought aloud.
Jeff objected, "Don't do that to her."
"Just tell him over the phone in a couple weeks," Brooke suggested.
"I really don't think it's a big deal," Jeff said. "You're twenty-five years old."
"Trust me," Sarah said, "He's nutso when it comes to his little girls. Let me handle it."
Their conversation had to end because Ed, Olivia, and Noah returned from their walk just then. Noah, full of energy, ran to greet Jeff and then Brooke and then Sarah who hoisted him on top of the island.
"Hi, No! Didja have a good walk?"
Noah held out his hand to her, offering a shell he'd collected along the way. "Here, Sarah," he said, pronouncing the "r" as a "w."
"Thank you," she gushed, "You sure know how to treat a lady!"
"You're drinking again?" Ed asked, shaking his head in disbelief.
"We couldn't find any Advil, so we figured we'd do the hair-of-the-dog method."
Olivia found her purse and produced a bottle of Advil, "Here, I have some."
Sarah smiled at Brooke, "Thanks, Olivia, we looked everywhere but your purse."
Olivia grinned at her.
Tucker was on the balcony cleaning up the mess he and Brooke made last night. The wind had taken care of most of their stray ashes, but the glass table was sticky with bourbon and the makeshift ashtray, the fern, needed to be cleared out.
"Dad?" Brooke called through the open door. "Are you going to make breakfast?"
"Or we could go out," Jeff offered.
"No way," Sarah replied, "I look and feel like crap."
"I'll do it," Olivia said. "Noah," she put him down, "Wanna play with mommy's iPad?" His face brightened. "Brooke, my iPad is over there on the table, will you turn it on for him? He knows how to get to the games."
"Sure," Brooke answered. Jeff, Sarah, and Brooke went over to the sofa, and Brooke plopped Noah in the Papasan.
Tucker joined Olivia in the kitchen. Neither one of them was an expert chef, but they could handle eggs and bacon. The kitchen was spacious enough for several people; even so, Ed made sure to accidentally-on-purpose bump into her every chance he got. As she held a large mixing bowl and whisked the eggs, he slid his arms around her waist from behind, nuzzling her neck and looking out at the four "kids" in the living room and the ocean in the distance.
The two of them had interacted more with Noah than with each other on the brief walk mostly because they were shaking off the cobwebs from yesterday, but partially because of the teeniest bit of awkwardness Ed had created by confessing his undying and endless love for Benson in the midst of a bourbon/vodka/beer-induced stupor.
He needed to clear that up.
"This is perfect," he said softly. Jeff had turned the television on and the sounds of ESPN's Sportscenter filled the room, so there was little chance of anyone else hearing him. Also, the hungover twenty-somethings were not interested in anything other than their impending breakfast and were not watching Ed and Olivia.
She continued whisking and agreed, "It is…how are you feeling?" Olivia was glad she'd gone to bed when she did. She felt a little fuzzy but not nearly as bad as she imagined the rest of them felt after drinking all day and night and mixing beer and liquor.
"Fine," he lied. His head was actually pounding and he was planning to ask Sarah to make him a Bloody Mary to have with his food. That would probably do the trick. He didn't want to ask Olivia for Advil. "And, like I said, this is perfect."
She moved to pour the eggs into the frying pan, so he released her from his grip and pushed the bacon around the skillet.
"I meant what I said last night," He said out of the side of his mouth, still staring straight ahead.
Olivia leaned into him. "I wasn't sure if you remembered."
He laughed nervously, "Like when you're their age, right?" He gestured to the twenty-somethings, "You drink too much and say things you don't mean and don't remember anyway?"
"Right."
"Brooke and I had a long talk. She told me not to screw this up."
Olivia concentrated on the eggs. "Have you often screwed things up?"
"Only once that mattered."
She wasn't quite sure how to respond. She knew he meant his marriage. She also knew from their previous conversations that he hadn't had a serious, long-term relationship since he'd been married, but she just now realized that this was new for him, and maybe his effort to make her feel secure was actually a ruse to erase some of the vulnerability he was feeling.
She finished with the eggs and skidded the pan across the stove. This time, she slid her arms around his waist. "If you're trying to screw things up," she said, "you're doing a really bad job at it."
He abandoned the bacon and faced her. "If I'm ever toeing the line, let me know." He tilted her chin up towards him and kissed her—Ed employed that outwardly innocent kiss of his where he let his lower lip linger for a split second, suggesting, if it weren't for the timing, he really would have gone for something more intimate.
Olivia raised an eyebrow and gave him her best Ed Tucker smirk. "Deal."
…..
As they were eating breakfast the sky clouded over and the predicted scattered thunderstorms moved in. Rain pelted the windows and thunderous clouds hovered over the ocean. Noah pressed his face to the glass door, mesmerized by Mother Nature.
"Cards?" Jeff suggested drowsily.
The girls shook their heads.
"How 'bout a movie?" Sarah suggested.
Brooke agreed, "Dad, let's watch Summer Rental! We always watch it here!"
"Oh, that's a good one," Olivia agreed.
Ed found the DVD, put it in the player, and returned to the couch. Noah was now on the floor entertaining himself with his toys, but the rest of the group left the Papasan open for him. Sarah and Jeff cuddled up in the armchair large enough for two. Brooke sat on one end of the sofa, and Tucker sat on the other end, Olivia nestled under his arm. He and Olivia were the only two who made it through the first half of the film.
"Everyone's asleep," Ed observed, scanning the room. Noah was curled up with Bernie and his Thomas blanket, Brooke was drooling on the armrest, Sarah was sprawled in the armchair, and Jeff, ceding the chair to his girlfriend, was snoozing on the floor, his head resting on one of Brooke's pillows.
"Do you want to keep watching?" Olivia asked, already knowing the answer.
"Let's leave it on." Ed stood up, "But you're coming with me." He led her to the bedroom, holding her hand.
As soon as he closed the door quietly behind them he began methodically removing her clothes, carefully paying attention to every inch of skin he revealed, trying to kiss every part of her body.
He was intent on finishing what he'd started last night. Ed Tucker was not a man of many eloquent words, so he relied on other ways to show his affection, his love, and his passion for Olivia. He gently lifted her onto the bed and methodically began making love to her. By now he knew precisely where she liked to be touched and caressed and teased, and he made sure to hit all the right spots. Every time she made an attempt to be even the least bit assertive he gently declined; right now was all about him pouring all of his sexual and emotional energy into her body and soul. She could reciprocate later.
There was very little time to bask in the afterglow, but they did devote a few minutes to remain entangled, staring into each other's eyes, not really knowing exactly what to say but able to understand and appreciate one another via the unspoken and esoteric chemistry felt only by those deeply in love.
They were brought out of the amorous trance by voices and footsteps. The condo was coming back to life.
Ed broke away from her and stretched out, brushing the back of his palm playfully across Olivia's face.
"I'm going to shower," he said lazily. "You wanna go out for dinner?"
Olivia gazed at him, "Yes," she said light-heartedly, "I think we expended all culinary skills on breakfast."
Ed moved to get out of bed, but Olivia pulled him back. "You're amazing," she whispered seductively into his ear, knowing she was not only lauding his sexual prowess but also tapping in to his general masculinity, his skills and instincts as an investigator, and his attentiveness to fatherhood. Ed Tucker took pride in being a good man, and Olivia's complement had a way of gratifying him on all possible levels.
He didn't really know what to say in response, so he just kissed her and headed to the shower. He turned on the fan and closed the door, but then had a thought.
"Hey," he stuck his head out before Olivia went back into the living room.
"Yeah?"
"I never wanted to be amazing before I met you." His eyes sparkled, and then he disappeared into the shower.
Olivia teared up, once again overwhelmed by Ed Tucker's unexpected eloquence.