Main conference room
11:23 a.m.
"FRANCE!" England shouted as he barged into the conference room, banging the double doors wide open. He thought he heard some sound a door shouldn't usually make but dismissed it. "Look! I have it! The red dove! There's no way Belarus could have found one so I'm the winner, right! ...France?"
England stopped and frowned. Half of the nations were standing and staring at him, not trying to hide their bewilderment. What was with them? England shrugged and continued his way to France who was standing too and staring at him jaw open, eyes wide.
"What's with you?" England's foot connected with something on the floor and he looked down. It was a gun. "Whuh? Did you guys have fun or what?"
He perched the dove on his shoulder where it cooed contentedly, and leaned down to grab the gun. As it appeared to be an ordinary handgun by all accounts England just shrugged, put it under his jacket and made the last steps to France. "Is something wrong, dear? Look, I brought you a dove."
France stared at him for a while. Slowly he began to smile and soon he was holding back laughter. England didn't get what was wrong. He heard some other nations having the same problem as France.
Cuba was leaning his forehead on the table and already having trouble breathing without snickering. Prussia was much the same but Austria was holding his mouth shut, even as his own lips were twisting upwards. Korea was full-out laughing and was doing so under the table, distorting the sound in a disturbing fashion. Many other nations were shaking with the effort to keep from laughing out loud.
England frowned. "Now really, whatever is the matter with you lot? Can't I even prove my love without you ninnies having a laugh?"
"Non," smiled France and patted England's head. "They're laughing because you were magnifique just now."
China slammed his fist down onto the tabletop like he was mad, but he was laughing. "What is this? A cartoon?"
"Ouch… That. Fucking. Hurt..."
England whirled around to see where the last comment had come from. Was that Turkey?
"England!" America struggled to his feet, holding his bleeding forehead with his left hand and attempting to steady himself on the door that had just hit him in the face with the other. "You don't treat the World Police this way!"
"Oww... I think I broke my nose..." Turkey commented from the other side of the doorway and stumbled to his knees, a hand on his face and a trickle of blood proceeding down his chin. A few pieces of his mask fell between his fingers and down to the floor. Some were stuck to the wooden door beside him, a little below eye level.
England stared at them and then turned to France. "Did I do that?"
"Oui, mon amour." France was still chuckling. "You had perfect timing I must say. They were just reaching the final stage of their oh-so-epic battle when you barged in. By the way, that gun you picked up belongs to America. It ended up on the floor after Turkey kicked it out of his hand. Do you want to give it back to Mister United States, mon chéri?"
"No," England said bluntly, now blind and deaf and uncaring to everyone but France. He held up the dove. "Here. Your bird. Can I have you now?"
France laughed again. "Aren't you straight-forward? Not that I should complain," France purred and pulled England close. The island nation blushed, making France purr even louder. "So impatient aren't we, chéri?"
"STOP RIGHT THERE!"
Alerted by the shriek, France released England just before Belarus could make use of her knives.
"Here!" the woman handed a small cage containing an undeniably red dove to France, glaring furiously at England who had started to emit something green again.
France stared at the red bird in disbelief. "How..." He looked faintly sick for a moment as he was hit with a sudden revelation. "Belarus... did you paint it with your blood?"
"No, used the blood of the pet shop owner," Belarus answered and Greece promptly had a heart attack. Belarus spared him a disparaging glance and continued. "Of course I used my own blood, silly. I'm a guest here; I wouldn't do something like that."
Ukraine sighed in relief and Egypt patted Greece in an attempt to calm him down.
But Belarus wasn't a nice girl after all.
"France," she said and leaned closer. "Marry me."
"Hell no!" England shouted. "Get away from him, now!"
"Ah," sighed France, scratching his head. "What a problem we have here... I really didn't expect you both to... find a red dove... really..."
"To think that they both managed to bring back something that doesn't exist," Lithuania noted.
"Totally," Poland said, sipping his pink, plaid flask of herbata.
"Can you feel the LovePower coming your way...?" Belgium hummed, trying to remember more lyrics to her old Eurovision song.
"Belgium!"
The blonde European quieted down, looking offended. Then she looked around the table. "Where did Canada go?"
"There." Kumajirou, who was occupying Canada's chair, helpfully pointed towards the door, then asked: "Who?"
"Don't point first and still ask..."
Canada was standing by the door, trying to decide whether he should help America or Turkey.
Turkey collected the remains of his mask from the floor, still holding his nose. "We shall call it a draw for now?"
"Definitely," America answered, holding his head. "Until my head stops pounding..."
"So," Turkey turned to Canada. "It's up to you."
"Eh?" Canada looked between the two.
"Just decide, okay?" Turkey leaned against the wall and closed his eyes. "Me or him?"
"...Eh?" Canada asked again. He had no time to formulate an answer before an impatient nation grew tired of their conversation.
"Whatever! Not interested! France!" Belarus grabbed the nation's collar and pulled him near. "Marry me~"
"So this is what it feels like to be Russia," France said quietly, staring into eyes that better befit a cold-blooded murderer than those of a lovesick maiden.
Russia smiled. "You can keep that role, France~"
"Ummm..." France thought about this. "No."
"What!" Belarus shouted, but was pulled back by England.
"Leave him alone, blasted harpy! He clearly said he doesn't want you, you wretched goose!"
"You shut up, damned eyebrow-peacock!"
"Right back at you, you fucking violent mother hen!"
"You malnourished magpie!"
"Ruffle-vulture!"
"Ostrich!"
"Roadrunner!"
"Coyote!"
"...That's not a bird!"
"Not my problem!"
"This is getting absurd..." Japan noted.
"This is just getting lively," Poland contradicted, pouring himself some more sweet tea. "But, the question is, where did France go?" Belarus and England froze. France was gone. He had disappeared from his seat.
"There," Kumajirou helpfully pointed again, now to the window through which France had just been about to sneak away and slip out of sight.
The escaping nation winced as everyone's eyes were now on him. France made a desperate bid for the garden outside, fleeing as fast as he could. England and Belarus charged after him as if on cue.
"Canada, teach your bear some manners!" France shouted back towards the conference room before disappearing to the bushes, two bloodthirsty lovers hot on his heels.
Canada blinked at the ceiling, looking completely innocence. "Who?"
"Well that's… certainly something you don't see every day," Germany said, staring out of the window.
"Whehe~ brother France is having fun," Italy chirped. "Germany~ let's try that too."
"No, Italy."
"Oh this is all so interesting," Seychelles sighed delightedly. She rolled her head and shoulders a couple of times and winced. "Romano. Come here and give me a massage, would you?"
South Italy popped up from his chair as fast as he could. "I can do something for you!" he asked enthusiastically.
"Yeah, yeah, come here, would you? I'll give you a hug."
"Seychelles..." Australia said, looking on as Romano began to knead the woman's shoulders and she closed her eyes. "You're enjoying this, aren't you...?"
Seychelles smiled. "What gives you that idea?"
"Is this okay?" Romano asked, blushing as he touched his beloved and simultaneously glaring daggers at Spain who was trying to talk him over to massage him too (and maybe a little lower).
"It's just what I needed," Seychelles answered and petted him. "Thanks honey. Keep it up just like that."
"Fully in character, aren't you," Australia chuckled and looked around the table. "Hey I wanna have a lover too. Volunteers?"
"Australia, it is not something that simple," China shook his head.
Greece winced and wanted to tell him just how simple it really was. He looked around and tried to find the persistent god that was to blame for all this trouble. Instead of Eros, he saw that a piece of Divine-wrought paper (invisible to everyone else as always) had been taped to the window:
Greece-boy! I figured I've earned a little refreshment after such
good work so I'm going to borrow your house for a midday nap and then
have some coffee and then I'll come back and share some more
love. Hang in there until then okay! Lo~ve! –Eros
Greece turned his back on the note and cursed the fact that Turkey wasn't beside him. Why was the bastard always absent when he really wanted to strangle someone?
.
Next time: Ukraine is confused, Hong Kong has a teacup and Eros meets his match.
TBC.
A/N: Translations:
French: magnifique = magnificent/awesome
non = no
oui, mon amour = yes, my love
mon chéri = my dear
Polish: herbata = weak, sweet Polish tea
Please do correct me if I'm wrong. And then some explanations:
Belgium's song: The KMG's - LovePower (Eurovision song contest 2007, Helsinki) I actually don't like that song. :P Apologies to anyone who does! it just fit too well to this so I added that.
ficfan3484: (chapter 3) America uses a gun because he wants to be cool. And even if he has super strenght, it's no use if you can't get a chance to use it: America is not the only one with quite a bit of battle experience =). And besides, that gun is plot point and I need it *grin*. Are you by way going to review every chapter? Not that I complain XD
Thanks for the other comments as well again. You're all making me happy =)
And then one thing I want to add: One of my personal favorite lines in this story appeared in this chapter: Turkey's "Oww... I think I broke my nose...". I don't know why, I just love that line.