A/N: In this chapter Kinky performs a parody of "Can't Touch This", it's a parody... which I'm pretty sure are allowed on this site. Interesting fact, Kinky's parody is more or less based on "Can't Touch Me" from Family Guy... I was even listening to that song when I was writing that part...
Chapter 4: The First Battle
Luffy and Zatch L charged in… fighting the monsters…
Kiyo sighed… "This is stupid…"
"This is Luffy and Zatch…" said Tia N.
"I have a plan!" yelled Kiyo.
Luffy and Zatch L still fought… Kiyo grumbled at this.
"Is his arm stretching…" said Sakura watching Luffy and Zatch L fight.
"He's a rubber man…" said Sanji.
"I guess like Mr. Fantastic…" said Kolulu L.
"Well I guess we should fallow suit…" said Sakura.
Yuki shrugged and both began to fight along side Luffy… then most of the others fallowed suit, except for Nami, Tia N, Sherry, Brago S (still a little of it), Zatch K and Kiyo.
"Well you tried…" said Nami.
Sakura was doing both using Yuki while damaging the monsters while fighting them hand to hand… the monster she was about to attack her… frontally Kinky was right beside her.
"Kinky Shield!" she called out using the insane talking rabbit as a shield… the monsters claws broke on the rabbit.
"How did that happen?" asked Luffy.
"I'll tell you!" said Kinky, "Can't kill me!"
She took out a boom box from pocket space and it began to play a karaoke version of "Can't Touch This"
"J-j-j-j-just like that kid Kenny. So can't die can you see! I can shoot my head even set myself on fire, stabbed and disemboweled and take this little pill! Can't kill me! Can't kill me" sang Kinky.
"What is she doing?" asked Nami with eye twitching.
"Can't kill me!" sang Kinky.
"I think… she's creating a distraction…" said Kiyo.
"Stop Kinky time! I'm immortal I can light a fire and jump in it! Don't like it, eat my butt! Just for a moment give me a cut!" sang Kinky.
The monster began attacking her she of course dodged… Kiyo used this time to grabbed Luffy and Tia N grabbed Zatch L while Sherry motioned to the others to fallow them.
"Can't kill me! Yeah do the Kinky cut! Can't kill me!" sang Kinky.
The others managed to get to the back deck.
"I'm immortal Kinky, I'm better than Highlander, I can't get my head chopped off so take a gander… I've survived from drowning to gunshots. It's Kinky! Go Kinky! I'm so Kinky! Your Kinky! Let's see Bill Murray survive this way! Can't kill me!" sang Kinky finishing the song.
The monsters and Mystery Mask began to applaud the talking rabbit… until they realized that all the bookkeepers were gone.
"Where are they?" demanded Mystery Mask.
"I have no idea…" said Kinky.
Meanwhile Kiyo cleared his throat. "Okay as I was saying I have a plan…" said Kiyo,
"Why didn't you say that earlier…" said Luffy.
"You weren't listening!" yelled the rest of the Straw Hats
"Does anyone have a pen and a piece of paper on them…" said Kiyo.
"I do…" said Fulgore.
Taking out what looked like autograph paper and a pen… Kiyo sighed and began draw a diagram, was a circle with 8 points…
"Okay my idea is we get into a circle, we stand back to back with our counterparts… this way can use team work with our counterparts and also make sure that we're not going in blind…" said Kiyo.
"That's a pretty good idea…" said Shion.
"Wow you really smart… I don't think I could come up with that…" said Luffy.
"I think you're the main reason for setting up this plan…" said Nami.
"We need a distraction to get into this formation…" said Kiyo.
"The cheese burgers are flying this way…" said Brago S.
"I think he's still out of it…" said Chopper.
"Well according to this note Kinky gave me, she did the math with Brago's body and the fact he's a mamodo he should snap right about now…" said Sakura looking at her watch that was conveniently on her wrist.
"Ow… what happened… my head…" said Brago.
"The rabbit shot you with a tranquilizer gun…" said Sherry.
"I'll kill her…" mumbled Brago.
"It's a shame you missed the musical number…" said Tia N.
"Apparently she can't be killed…" said Zoro.
"Anyways…" said Kiyo who explained is plan to Brago.
"Now all we need is a distraction so we can get into formation…" said Kiyo.
"Leave the to me!" said Usopp.
Back at the lower deck…
"Tell me where they are now… or you will face an evil punishment…" said Mystery.
"What you going to kill me… are you stupid… I just did a musical number about I can't be killed…" said Kinky.
"That doesn't mean you can't be eaten…" said Mystery Mask.
One of them monsters ate her… however much like the Alien, she popped out the chest… however the creature survived.
"What the hell…" said Mystery Mask.
"I would do the musical number again but I don't want to…" said Kinky.
"That will be your punishment then…" said Mystery Mask.
"That's stupid…" said Kinky but got an evil idea… she was going to sing a different song… but before she could "The Barney Song" they heard Usopp yelled out "Smoke Star" fallowed by a huge smoke cloud surrounding them…
"Shoot I was going to have some fun too…" said Kinky.
When the smoke cleared they were surrounded, the bookkeepers and mamodo stood back to back.
"This needs from cool music…" said Kinky, she took out her boom box and it began ot play Magical Idol Kourin from, Nurse Witch Komugi.
"Put on something more appropriate!" yelled Sakura.
"Fine, fine…" said Kinky. She changed it to H.P.S.J from Bo-bobo.
"Maybe we should just ignore it…" said Nami.
Megumi nodded "Yeah…" she said.
"What's with her…" said Usopp.
"We wish we knew…" said Yuki S.
"This songs no good…" said Kinky.
She began to play the Naruto BGM Turn Over…
"You think you can defeat my monsters…" said Mystery Mask.
"We don't think… we know…" said Luffy.
All of them got their books ready.
"Zaker!" read Luffy.
"Ready Zatch…" said Kiyo pointing to the monster… "Zaker!"
Both shot their lighting… Zatch K hit more than Zatch L.
With Team Tia.
"We should try to our best…" said Megumi.
Nami nodded.
"Right!" said Both Tias.
"Saisu!" read both.
Both destroyed a few monsters.
With Team Kanchome.
"You ready…" said Sanji.
"Right…" said Kanchome S getting in position.
"Poruk!" read Sanji.
Kanchome S transformed into a ball, which Sanji kicked, Kanchome hit a few and destroyed the monsters… Fulgore and Kanchome F stood there with the9ir mouth gapped open.
"No way…" said Kanchome F.
"Their… a whole lot cooler than we are…" said Fulgore.
With Team Kolulu…
Both dark Kolulus were fighting the monsters… Lori was scared… she was trembling a bit
"You okay?" asked Zoro.
"I'm fine… I'm just not used to this fighting…" admitted Lori.
With Team Ponygon…
Both were fighting in Shudoruk armor…
"All right Ponygon!" cheered Kafk.
"You can do it Schneider…" cheered Chopper.
Ponygon K looked at Ponygon C.
"Meru… meru meur mei…" said Ponygon K (Translation: Does he… know your real name…)
"Meru!" said Ponygon C nodding (Translation: Yep!)
"Meru…" cried Ponygon K (Translation: Lucky…)
With Team Nya...
"Peruk!" read Shion.
Nya S grew in size and shot out quills at the monster… they couldn't move in pain.
"Kyadopan!" read Kaya.
Nya K began to slice those in pain with her claws.
"Looks like we already a good team…" said Shion.
"We're not the only ones…" said Kaya, she motioned over to Team Yuki.
With Team Yuki…
"Blizdo!" tread Usopp.
Yuki U sent out a wave of snow and ice… many of the monsters were trapped inside…
"Now it's our turn… Frostruk!" read Sakura.
Yuki S produced her snowman minions that only say "Happy Birthday!"
"You two already make a great team…" said Yuki U.
"We sure do! After all I'm the great Captain Usopp…" said Usopp.
"Yo! Captain Usopp… your legs are shaking…" said Kinky joining her owner's team.
Usopp was a little sacred and that made his legs shake of course.
And finally with Team Brago…
Both Robin and Sherry sighed at their partners… when not aiming at the monsters… they aimed at each other…
"Why only them…" asked Sherry.
"It's because one considers the other weaker, while the "weaker" one hates the "stronger" one for thinking of only himself…" said Robin.
Both Bragos didn't notice the monsters heading towards their bookkeepers… Sherry didn't know how to react however, Robin merely crossed her arms and gave a smirk. Suddenly the monsters were covered in many arms holding them back both Bragos stopped what they were doing… mainly because Brago S' eyes were nearly bursting out of their head. Brago R nodded and aimed for the monsters.
"Reis…" read Robin, right before the gravity ball hit, the arms disappeared.
"What… was that?" asked Sherry.
"Robin ate a devil fruit… like Luffy and Chopper…" explained Brago R.
"Lucky him…" thought Brago S.
Not too long later the last one was destroyed by Zatch L, the majority of the bookkeepers were breathing heavily.
"So you may have defeated me this time by I'll be back…" said Mystery Mask then he disappeared.
"That was tough…" said Kiyo.
"Tell me about it…" said Megumi.
Meanwhile Mystery Mask appeared in a strange dark place and three other people were there… all covered in shadows.
"So how was it?" asked a woman.
"Well they defeated my minions… with help from their counterparts… here's an interesting fact… they brought an immortal rabbit with them…" said Mystery Mask.
"Interesting… but I think we should I should show them our true power…" said the woman.
Later on the Merry Go…
Most of the mamodo were sleeping except for the two Bragos, the bookkeepers, Bragos and insane magical girl mascot were in the galley talking…
"This is going to be tough…" said Lori with sigh.
"It's just something we're going to have to get used to…" said Zoro.
"It's just I'm not used to fighting…" said Lori.
Kiyo knew it was true, Lori only had one mamodo battle ever… and it was hard for her… everyone in the room had some sort of battle experience… now she was forced into this… however the subject was quickly changed by the two Bragos… they were glaring lighting bolts at each other.
"I'm going to bed…" said both.
The glared at each other again… "Stop it…" they both said.
After a few minutes of yelling stop it at each other both left.
"They serially need to work on their team work…" said Sherry.
"I have an idea…" said Kinky.
Everyone turned the deranged rabbit.
"We chain them up, give them a deadly nerve agent, and in order to the antidote they have to saw off each other's leg" said Kinky.
Everyone stared at her while sweat dropping. Sakura grabbed the rabbit, went out side while punting her shouting "I HATE THAT RABBIT!"
"She does have a good idea…" said Robin.
The Straw Hats stared her.
"Robin… have you lost it?" asked Usopp.
"What I meant was part of it…" said Robin with a smirk.
She whispered it to the others… they all began to chuckle evilly… expect for Kiyo who commented, "At least it's not a Saw rip-off…"
Next Time: Buggy the Clown appears! However the Knowlie show off their true powers! What they do is something that will make our rag tag group of heroes save the day even more... meanwhile the two Bragos are handcuffed together, they must learn to get along before they can be free... where's a hacksaw when you need one?