Here comes the third chapter!

Thanks for all the support given me thus far. We have passed the 10-reviews-mark now and I'm super happy!

I'm also excited to announce that as of now, Joyous Children has a beta: welcome the amazing NightsBlackRose13! This chapter and a huge chunk of the coming plot are all thanks to their awesomeness. I'm so glad that you joined in and hope for more rad teamwork in the future.

Enjoy the new chap and tell me what you think, as usual :)

Chapter 3: Who Signed me up for this Rollercoaster Ride?

My resolve stands firm for a grand total of one whole night. Come morning, it starts to crumble like a cookie gone stale.

My desire to be a decent human being is challenged by a massive beast that's never had the chance to rear its ugly head in my first life. It goes by the name of 'I'm-too-selfish-to-risk-my-life-for-the-good-of-mankind'.

Or otherwise known as cowardice.

At least I'm honest with myself.

But this thought doesn't really help me to quench the rising panic. Because suddenly I realize, really realize what having been born into this world truly entails.

This is a place where children are raised to become killers.

Where the lines between failure and success all blur into one huge nightmare.

Where lives are nothing more than figures on a board, easily discarded and sacrificed for the goals of someone else.

The more I agonize over this, the more I become disgusted with myself. Because I'm quickly losing this battle against plain old fear. Seems like fighting for the common good is not enough motivation for me to overcome it.

I am no Uchiha Itachi. I am no Hatake Kakashi. Hell, I'm not even a Shimura Danzou.

At one point, I start making compromises.

I could still try to gain political leverage as a civilian by intelligent scheming. There's got to be a way to be a person with influence without being a shinobi.

Of course I know that something like this will not solve a single thing in a hidden village – or the impending Uchiha massacre for that matter, as far in the future as it is. I know it and I choose to ignore it because I'm weak.

That's where I have to admit it to myself: I'm nothing more but a sorry piece of trash.

)()()(

Two years go by within the blink of an eye. They're peaceful times, characterized mainly by the repetitive rhythm of everyday life.

I continued practicing my language as well as my motoric skills, because even though my enthusiasm for lofty goals has cooled down considerably, it's still better than succumbing to the boredom that comes with living the restricted life of a baby.

I might be a coward, yes, but I'm also uncomfortable with idleness. In fact, practicing to become independent helped a lot with getting over the realization-induced depression. It's familiar and I take comfort in it as it is something that I actually feel confident to do.

Talking became easy as soon as I'd managed the articulation part which involved the main muscle work. After getting down the various and tricky consonants of Japanese, I was up for the actual learning of the language.

I started with repeating everything okaa-chan and otou-san said to me. As soon as I had an idea of the meaning behind their words I proceeded to put them into new contexts. I relished the freedom of being allowed to make as many mistakes as I needed to do to get the things right. Grammar seeped into me almost casually and the more I listened in to the conversations between okaa-chan and otou-san, the more gratifying it became.

I wish I had learnt every foreign language like that.

Learning how to stand, to walk and to use my hands in an intelligent way was much harder, though. Unlike language, which is almost entirely based on theoretical foundations that one mainly just needs to understand, activating your muscles is solid work. Just because you know how your legs are supposed to function, it doesn't mean that they actually do.

Methodical training accelerates the process massively, though, and I'm pretty sure that my rapid progress is not common. As petty as it seems, seeing as I'm actually in my twenties and not a toddler, I'm proud of that.

That is, until I overhear one of okaa-chan's and otou-san's conversations this fateful evening two years later.

I have decided to ask okaa-chan to teach me kanji calligraphy as a follow-up on the hiragana and katakana writing and the reading lessons - and let me tell you, children's books in the shinobi world are so not subtle in their attempts to brainwash you, it's not even funny - and stand in front of the shoji screen that leads to our living room when I hear their voices.

"You're teaching her calligraphy today?" otou-san asks. He sounds surprised and I halt in my tracks, curious about okaa-chan's answer.

"Yes, she asked me to. It's amazing, isn't it? Just last week we started reading 'Adventures of the little ninja Keiichi' and guess what she said after we finished it?"

There's a short pause in which I imagine otou-san nodding encouragingly at okaa-chan to continue.

"She said: 'This depiction of shinobi life is completely unrealistic.'"

Oops.

I don't remember saying this aloud. That's … not good. My hands begin to sweat profusely and I'm just short of barreling into the room to stop okaa-chan from telling more.

In hindsight, I should totally have done that.

"She … she said that?" otou-san asks wearily.

"Yes. And Nobuo, she's an incredibly fast learner at everything we throw at her. At first, when you suggested we test her abilities I was suspicious, but now I think you were right all along."

What. What. What!

They've been testing me? What is this? What did I get myself into? How could I have not noticed this?!

And then she says those words. Words that, I'm sure, will doom my entire existence.

"I really believe that Etsuko-chan is a prodigy."

Well, shit.

)()()(

The world has stopped spinning.

No.

No, no, no, no, no!

Anything, anything but this. Please.

How could I've been so stupid? So utterly, devastatingly stupid? How could I let myself go that much?

How could I have not seen this coming?

My mind is sent into overdrive as I frantically dig through my memories of the last two years. I try to filter every instance in which okaa-chan or otou-san might have given me a challenge to test my abilities.

And now that I think of it, there seem to be quite a few.

The one where okaa-chan talked me into meditation as a cure for the headaches that sometimes accompanied my writing sessions, which ultimately led me to discover my chakra. This in turn resulted in games in which she made me poke at it regularly.

Or the one where otou-san decided that the hours spent on the playground were a good time to try out acrobatics because I wouldn't play with the other kids anyway.

The constant but subtle feed of words that should have been too complex to grasp for a toddler.

I also remember one moment where otou-san had tried to put a rubber kunai into my hands which I had rejected vehemently. It had happened relatively early on and I think that this has been a learning experience for them. Because of my refusal to take the toy when offered outright they had started to disguise their tests as games and challenges.

What I believed to be indulgences in the wishes of a curious child had really been them putting me to a test.

The realization falls like scales from my eyes.

My parents are sneaky, manipulative bastards.

And I ran into their trap head-on.

Goddamnit.

They say I'm a fucking prodigy.

This is so ironic, because if anything, I rather feel like the biggest idiot that ever lived. Because, a mid-twenties woman being beaten by two people who were aiming to outsmart a baby? Haha, joke's on me.

Aside from this there's still the fact that being a prodigy in the Uchiha clan is a failsafe ticket for a ride directly into the realms of insanity.

I definitely don't want that.

The question now is, what can I do to prevent this?

First, I have to create the impression of everything being peachy as usual. It wouldn't do for them to get suspicious.

So I draw in a deep breath, count slowly to ten and push the shoji screen aside.

Calligraphy now, worries about my status as a prodigy later.

)()()(

"You did very well on your first try, Etsuko-chan!" okaa-chan says.

I plaster a cheery smile on my face, but the praise doesn't sound as sweet as it might have done before I heard of my parents' scheming.

For the two hours this session lasted, I've barely been able to hold back on my thoughts and anxieties and I feel like a paranoid nutjob, what with the constant fear that anything I say might be used against me.

I'm pathetic like that and I know it.

I need to retreat as soon as possible and make an inconspicuous beeline for the exit, but okaa-chan's voice stops me.

"Wait, Etsuko-chan, stay a bit! Your father and I have something to discuss with you."

I literally freeze on the spot.

Oh god. They're going to come clean to me?!

This is bad. If they confess to me now, my chances of correcting their opinion will decrease massively. Any attempt of mine to get this prodigy image off my butt will be running into a heightened risk to be revealed, because they might actually think of me trying to do that.

I'm not making the same mistake and underestimate them again.

I panic and inch steadily closer to the shoji screen.

"Does … does it have to b-be now?" I stutter. "I-"

"Are you going somewhere, little lady?"

I spin around hastily and nearly trip over my feet. Otou-san is standing almost directly behind me like a big looming shadow. I feel so small. Not only physically, but, you know, like an animal trapped. He's sporting an amused smirk.

I'd like to wipe that off your face, sir. May I, please?

I don't know how much of my thought is showing on my face, but otou-san either doesn't see or doesn't care. He just bends, lifts me off my feet and carries me back to the table where okaa-chan is still sitting.

After everyone has gotten comfortable on one of the sitting pillows okaa-chan speaks again.

"We have great news for you, Etsuko-chan!" she begins.

Oh god. Oh god. Oh my gaawwd.

"I'm not going to beat around the bush, as it will be something life changing and you'll have to adjust to it."

Nonononono, I don't want to hear –

"So what I'm meaning to say is-"

Leave me alone, I'mnotgonnabeanUchihaprodigy-

"- that you'll soon have a little sibling!"

NOO-

What.

Sibling? Is this a new synonym for 'prodigy'? But that wouldn't make any sense?!

I stare dumbly at okaa-chan. I'm pretty sure my mouth is hanging wide open and that I'm looking like a total moron, but I have other priorities right now.

Like, that prodigy-turned-sibling thing.

After a few seconds of no reaction on my sides, the smile on okaa-chan's face starts to falter and a worried tone creeps into her voice. "Are you alright, sweetie?"

I try to answer, I really do, but somehow my mind is just one blank slate at the moment and I can't think of anything to say.

Okaa-chan shoots a glare at otou-san that clearly says 'Are you just going to sit there and watch?' and hurriedly pulls me into a hug.

"I'm sorry, sweetie, I didn't mean to shock you! Look, I promise, nothing is going to change between us, we'll still do all the things we used to and you'll be able to keep your room to yourself because we're going to make the guest room the new baby's room and-"

Okaa-chan is rambling. I blink and try to refocus.

"I-I'm fine" I croak out weakly against her shoulder. She doesn't notice, though, and I have to say it again, louder. "Okaa-chan, I'm fine!"

And, I think, in a way, I really am.

After all, my nightmare has not come true –yet – and this is kind of … nice news.

I had a brother in my old life. I wonder what he's up to.

She stops rambling and looks at me with wide eyes. "Are you sure?"

I smile tentatively and am relieved that it doesn't feel forced. "Yes, pretty sure."

I wonder if this new sibling will be a girl or a boy.

)()()(

I can't remember having a single dream since being reborn here and I'm surprised at how little it actually bothers me. Perhaps it is because dreams are supposed to be an indicator for a person's desires.

I don't remember desiring anything since I've fallen into this black hole of selfish fear two years ago. Grasping for momentary distractions and connecting them with the purpose inherent to continuous practice has become my new scale for the progress of time.

And look where that got me.

Tonight, though, as my head hits the pillow and the customary darkness begins to envelope my mind, I have an inkling that things are going to change.

It doesn't vanish in the morning.

I wonder if this may count as an imprint of a dream.

)()()(

In the end, I come to the conclusion that there's only so much that I can do in this prodigy situation.

Most of the damage is already done and slowing down my success from now on might not convince them that I'm normal. But maybe I can make them believe that I'm only a smart kid. 'Smart kid' is still miles away from 'prodigy' after all.

Probably.

Right?!

)()()(

My birthday on the 27th of December comes and goes. Okaa-chan asks me if I want a party for my third and I look at her with one raised eyebrow. She shrugs and organizes a small get-together with a handful of the nicer relatives anyway.

I end up mainly stuffing my face with the delicious birthday cake okaa-chan made me and impatiently waving away the few kids that came with their parents. Since they're older than me they're not too sad about not having to babysit me.

)()()(

Okaa-chan is really big now and eating literally every single minute. I ask her one day if I had blown up her stomach that much, too. Otou-san takes my hand and quietly leads me out of the kitchen. As soon as he has closed the shoji screen behind him he squats down to my eye-level.

He's looking dead serious.

"Never, never again tell your mother that she looks fat."

…

Oh.

…

I start to tell him that I didn't mean it as an insult, that I'm really only interested-

He puts a hand on my shoulder and says "Just don't."

)()()(

Winter progresses and on the 10th of February, her water breaks.

Looking back, this date should have rung a bell. Or three.

As I'm sitting in the waiting room, patiently staying put until I and otou-san are given the go-ahead, I can see that he's nervous. He doesn't pace or fidget in his seat because obviously, he's an Uchiha, but I notice the tense line in his shoulders and the rigidity of his back anyway.

The thought that, although he looks like a standard Uchiha male I have come to know him pretty well by now, comes into my mind. I can't deny the warm feeling that spreads in my stomach whenever I think of either okaa-chan or otou-san.

Suddenly I'm glad that they're both safely employed within the village walls, what with otou-san being a member of the Uchiha Police Force and okaa-chan being a retired kunoichi. I'm already long past the point of feeling nothing if something ever should happen to them.

Finally, a nurse opens the door to okaa-chan's room.

"You may come in now. Congratulations to a healthy new baby, Uchiha-san!"

Otou-san thanks her curtly and grabs my hand to practically drag me through the door.

Okaa-chan lies in the middle of pristine white hospital sheets, looking exhausted but happy. She beams at us as we enter the room and gives us an enthusiastic wave.

There, on her chest, is a little bundle.

A middle aged doctor is standing at okaa-chan's bedside but I don't think otou-san even registers her as he tightens his old on my fingers and approaches the bed.

Okaa-chan smiles. "It's a boy, Nobuo" she whispers and I can practically hear otou-san's breathing hitch. "Come here and hold him."

He lets go of my hand and I step back a bit to allow them a moment. Almost reverently, otou-san touches the little bundle that is my brandnew brother and lifts him off okaa-chan's chest. Okaa-chan's eyes find me and she raises one eyebrow.

"What are you doing there in the corner, Etsuko-chan? Come here and greet your otouto, too."

My otouto, huh. It has a nice ring to it.

So it's to the picture of us three crowded around the new baby that the doctor clears her throat.

"Congratulations from my side, too, Uchiha-san. I'm furthermore glad to say that we didn't meet any complications at the delivery. Both Kiyomi-san and the baby boy are in perfect health."

Otou-san looks up from the bundle cradled against his chest. There is a crease between his eyebrows and his voice sounds just a little weary as he asks "So there was nothing … unusual about him, sensei?"

Huh. Did he expect something unusual? And did I only imagine his eyes briefly darting to me when he said 'unusual'? Is there something I should know about?

The doctor shakes her head and smiles. "No, Uchiha-san. Your son is perfectly fine."

Otou-san almost visibly relaxes with a relieved breath. "Thank you, sensei."

I'm pretty sure that there is something and I'm getting antsy. Why do I keep getting the feeling that this world is constantly throwing things at me that I'm not prepared to deal with?

"Have you thought of a name, yet?" the doctor asks.

"Yes" okaa-chan says. "This time, we already prepared one beforehand."

I can't quite stop the quiet snort that escapes my nose there.

Yeah, you'd better have. Wouldn't want to make that mistake again, would we?

Her answer, said in the sweetest tone of approaching doom, goes off like a bomb in my head.

"His name is Uchiha Obito."

Tadah. Any lingering doubts about her place on the timeline should be removed now, ne?

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