I own nothing. Warnings in chapter 1. I own nothing. Enjoy!

'Tell me Santana,' Vanessa signed calmly, 'How do you know ASL?'

Vanessa, Kurt, and I were in Kurt's car driving to Vanessa's house where Blaine was sick as a dog. I don't know why I offered to help. There was just something that drew me to Vanessa. It was almost the thing I felt when I had first started whatever I had with Brittany.

She was so much more though. Vanessa was artsy, smart, and funny. As much as I loved Brittany she made me feel like I had to take care of her and walk on egg shells. The two of them seemed totally different to me and it was making my head spin. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do with either of them.

Brittany looked so sporty and unique, like she was trying to draw attention to her. Vanessa looked like a Bohemian Goddess, like she belonged to the Earth. Everything about her was completely natural and pure. She was someone that I could see owning nothing expect a camera or some things to draw and traveling the world.

'Santana,' Vanessa signed slowly, 'Are you alright?'

'Yeah,' I signed calmly, 'There is a medical condition in my family. It has something to do with a bone growing in the inner ear. My Grandma is deaf because of it.'

'I'm sorry.'

'It's alright.'

'When we get to my place do you want to order some pizza?'

'Sure, how about I order some pepperoni and onion?'

'Those are my favorite toppings. Here, you can use my phone to order when Kurt stops the car. Meet me in my room when you're done. It's the third door on your right when you go upstairs. I'm going to see how Blaine is doing.'

I nodded calmly as Vanessa climbed out of the car and ran into the house. Kurt turned to me and smiled knowingly. Sending him a quick glare I dialed the pizza place and placed the order. Kurt laughed as he climbed out of the car himself.

As soon as I was off the phone I sighed and looked at the house. I had to go in there and act like I wasn't attached to her in any way. I could barely act like I wasn't about to cry whenever I saw Brittany.

She said that when she was done with Artie that she would be with me. They had broken up more then a month ago and we still weren't together. I didn't know what to think about our relationship.

Vanessa was a new start though. She was fourteen and I was sixteen, which was only two years difference. I couldn't think like that yet though, I didn't know if Vanessa would even consider going on with me.

Sighing I climbed out of the car and made my way into the house. Looking around the house I saw just how big it was. With a shake of my head I tried to ignore the feeling of out of place that was filling me.

I could tell that Vanessa and Blaine came from money. It might not have been a lot of money, but it was a lot more then my family. Climbing up the stairs I made my way to Vanessa's room only to freeze when I saw her room.

From the drawings and designs I had seen on the clothes and school supplies I knew that Vanessa could draw, but this was amazing. Her walls were completely covered in paintings, drawings, and so much more.

'Santana,' Vanessa said when she saw me come in, 'What took you so long?'

'It took awhile to get through to the pizza place,' I signed quickly, 'These are amazing.'

'Thank you. I love drawing, painting, sketching, and all of that. Blaine has his music and I have my art.'

'You're really good at it. I wish I could draw.'

'It takes a lot of practice. I mean, I completely sucked when I first started, but I had nothing better to do in the hospital.'

'Wait, why did you have to learn ASL? I thought you were born deaf.'

'No, I lost my hearing a few years back.'

As Vanessa told me what happened to lose her hearing I realized why her and Blaine were so close. How Blaine let her out of his sight was amazing to me and Vanessa didn't seem to mind.

She seemed so happy about everything that happened, like she was completely okay with everything. I knew that if that had happened to me I wouldn't have reacted as well.

Anger filled my heart from just what she was telling me and I could tell that she was playing most of it down. I didn't know whether to think she was hiding her emotions or if she was truly okay.

'None of that matters anymore,' Vanessa signed after a few moment of silence, 'Do you want to look at some drawings?'

'Sure,' I signed sitting on her bed.

Vanessa grinned happily and pulled out a sketchpad. She showed me some drawings she had done and explained what they were before flipping to the last page and looking between it and me.

'Can I draw you?' Vanessa signed with a hopeful look in her eyes.

'Sure,' I signed calmly, 'Why do you want to draw me?'

'I want to because you're beautiful.'

Smiling slightly I looked at the floor and wondered why I was reacting this way to Vanessa. Brittany had told me things like that all the time, but it seemed different when Vanessa said it.

When I looked back at Vanessa she was drawing something. I wanted to look at it, but with the look she sent me when I tried to I realized that she was actually trying to draw me.

It took Vanessa awhile, but when Vanessa was done she looked happy with how everything had turned out. I offered my hand to Vanessa to take the sketchpad, but she looked at me sadly.

'I hope you like it,' Vanessa signed after she handed it to me.

I looked at Vanessa with a smile before turning the pad over. My eyes went wide as I saw how beautiful the drawing was. Vanessa drew me in a way I had never seen before.

'This is how you think I look?' I signed in slight shock.

'No,' Vanessa signed with a smile, 'This is how I know you look. You're beautiful Santana.'

I opened my mouth to say something else to Vanessa when I heard the doorbell ring. Smiling slightly I told her that the pizza was there and I was going to go get it. She smiled back happy and stood from her bed as I left.

After I got the pizza I found myself sitting on the floor in the kitchen. Everything with Vanessa was messing with my mind so badly and I didn't know what I was supposed to do.

"So, what's up with you and Vanessa?" Kurt asked making me jump.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I said standing up, "I have to go..."

"Vanessa is like my little sister, Santana. I don't care if you have a crush on her or if you date her, but don't string her along or hurt her."

"I don't even know if she likes me like that."

"She just showed the drawing of you she did to Blaine. She said you were like a dream she had. That you were so beautiful and perfect. Is that good enough for you?"

I watched as Kurt walked back upstairs trying to decide if what he was saying was true or not. The last time I had put my heart on the line it got riped to shreads and I didn't want to feel that again.

Feeling a tap on my shoulder I turned around and saw Vanessa looking at me worriedly. I gave her a small smile and placed the pizza on the table. Vanessa looked at me in confusion and I saw this innocent look in her eyes.

As much as I wanted to tell Vanessa how much I liked her at that moment I knew that it wasn't going to be the right time. Vanessa needed to know me first before I did this to her.

I knew that she would be okay with me liking girls, but I didn't know how she would react when we had to explain everything to everyone. I couldn't just say that I had a strong like for her the moment I saw her. I couldn't even tell anyone that I loved Brittany.

Vanessa was too special for me to hurt because I wasn't comfortable with who I was yet. She needed me to be completely okay with who I was and I wasn't there. It would hurt her too much if I started dating her and had to keep it a secret.

'Is something wrong?' Vanessa signed with a worried look.

'No,' I signed with a fake smile, 'I just wanted to get something to drink if that was alright.'